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RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/14/2016 3:53:38 PM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline 		I don't often get many "funny" messages on the other side.

But here's one I got recently -
quote:

From: Sweet********



Dated: 6/28/16 6:19 PM

[You cannot respond to this message because the account no longer exists]

idi amin


Dafuq????

Never heard of her and never conversed with her either.
There's some weird nutters out there.


_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
George Orwell, 1903-1950


(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1521
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/14/2016 4:15:28 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:


Hello
Do you get spanked online?


And that is the entirety of the message.

I politely <cough> explained that it's impossible to get spanked online.

And now he's emailed the same exact message again and done a chat request after I told him to go away.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1522
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/19/2016 10:40:45 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		So, my profile says "Just here for the forums"

I received this:

Him: Are you fat,slim or plumpy?? Well I don't care I just wanna know OSIDEgirl

Me: As my profile says, I'm just here for the forums.

Him: Forums? Or you don't do men... I got a lot of female slaves..you could have one








_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1523
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/19/2016 1:22:27 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Takes a hell of a lot of stupidity to be on this site and not know what the word forum means.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1524
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/19/2016 1:24:31 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Takes a hell of a lot of stupidity to be on this site and not know what the word forum means.



Apparently, it's code for "I'm a lesbian".... I never knew that.

I wonder how his multitudes of female slaves would be pleased to know that he'll offer to give them away to anyone on the internet.

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 7/19/2016 1:37:01 PM >

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 1525
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 7/25/2016 9:02:48 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		So, the other day, I was on the Kindle, went to set it down and my hand hit the screen and opened a profile. Within a few minutes, I get a cut and paste message:

quote:

Greetings: We noticed you viewed Our profile so We returned the favor. And since We consider it bad form to not at least say hello and introduce Ourselves that is what We now are doing....; ) If you have any questions or comments feel free to ask We pride Ourselves on being very open and honest and try to help with what advice We can or if it's just a chat We are on most nights.


I don't understand people that think viewing a profile is an invitation or indication and honestly, it just strikes me as something desperate. And the part about "We consider it bad form" kinda comes across as a manipulation to get people to reply.

So, I came to the conclusion that I would test them to see if they actually had seen my profile. I have a picture of M placed in the middle of my photos, to see if people actually look at my profile.

I asked them if they could tell me three things about myself beyond age, ethnicity and orientation.

The response I got back was epic.

quote:

Well frankly nothing caught Our eye and if you were to read Our message you would have noticed the only reason We looked at your profile was because you had viewed Ours. (let's start with an insult...ohhh...burnnn) But unlike you We had the common courtesy to introduce Ourselves and offer a polite invitation to both read Our profile and to contact Us if you liked.(We troll everybody that looks at our profile and then try to make them feel bad about not sending a message) But like so many on here you feel you are special and have no manners or proper composure. (translation - I didn't do what they wanted) A simple thank you for Our message or even a no thank you was all that was in order (We're supposed to thank Trollers for their messages?) but instead you decided to be rude (Again, how was I rude? Because I didn't respond like they wanted me to?) and if as your profile states you are only here for the forums We suggest you stick to them and stay off of Real members profiles. (and a closing insult about being fake because I'm not trolling)


All this because I accidentally bumped my Kindle.

Quick everyone.....go view their profile....



< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 7/25/2016 9:11:57 AM >

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1526
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/23/2016 1:10:00 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1527
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/23/2016 2:57:19 PM   
WhoreMods


Posts: 10691
Joined: 5/6/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
I wonder how his multitudes of female slaves would be pleased to know that he'll offer to give them away to anyone on the internet.

I suppose if he has a swap or two, it's one way to complete his set.

_____________________________

On the level and looking for a square deal.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1528
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/23/2016 4:15:20 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1529
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/23/2016 4:29:10 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles

I'm sure the photo of M on my profile suddenly gained some perspective for him.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 1530
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/24/2016 3:05:41 AM   
ShaharThorne


Posts: 11071
Joined: 2/24/2009
From: Somewhere in TX
Status: offline 		I get that guy once in a while, Oside...I just check it and delete unread (love the preview option).

_____________________________

Goddess of Yarn

You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex! -Lola, Kinky Boots

Founder: Bitch with Tits

Whip me, beat me, make me feel cheap and have great sex

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1531
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/24/2016 10:08:58 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Just got this one:

Him - I lead you into the hotel room, as soon as the door closes, I shove you against the wall. Then I run my fingers all over your upper body. Do I find you wearing a bra?

me - What you find is my ex-linebacker Master/husband removing your teeth.

For some reason he hasn't replied.....


This made me laugh ... I mean hard!

I am so surprised he hasn't messaged you back lol

Needles

I'm sure the photo of M on my profile suddenly gained some perspective for him.


Haha, had to check him out for myself just so I had the perspective too. I'm sure M is going to fit nicely in to this guys fantasy

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1532
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/26/2016 3:47:45 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Him: Are you enjoying the forums?

Me: Yes, I like seeing the perspectives of other people

Him: Sir

Me: Oh, I'm not a "Sir", I'm female.

Him: I'm a Sir and you will address me as such.

Me: You're not my Sir and it's a term of respect...so no, I won't

Him: You're not a submissive, you're fucking wannabe. That's why you can't find anybody and have to hang out in the forums.

Me: Wrong. I've been married to Master for 17 years. Have a nice day.

<blocked>

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 8/26/2016 4:11:53 PM >

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 1533
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/26/2016 4:00:07 PM   
Spiritedsub2


Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline 		^ Impossible to believe that charmer is still on the market

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1534
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/26/2016 4:12:32 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

^ Impossible to believe that charmer is still on the market

If you hurry, I bet you could snatch him up!

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)
Profile   Post #: 1535
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/27/2016 12:42:48 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read.

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 1536
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/28/2016 11:06:08 AM   
NorthernGent1


Posts: 218
Joined: 6/27/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read.

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.



(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 1537
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/28/2016 11:32:09 AM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent1


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read.

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.





An assessment of my profile?

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to NorthernGent1)
Profile   Post #: 1538
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/28/2016 12:23:37 PM   
NorthernGent1


Posts: 218
Joined: 6/27/2016
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins


quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent1


quote:

ORIGINAL: needlesandpins

Wow, super stud.

One in my mail box today;

"Hello. Dominant Male and experienced Master, seeking submissive/switch. Are you interested?"

Well now, Sherlock, the clue you are seeking would be in my profile that you haven't read.

Needles



Just read your profile, well, skimmed it.

I could give you an honest assessment, but probably wouldn't be good form in public.





An assessment of my profile?

Needles


Yes. You. Aged 42. From Doncaster, Bradford or whatever it is in Yorkshire, of Italian heritage.

(in reply to needlesandpins)
Profile   Post #: 1539
RE: Funny Messages from the "Other Side" - 8/28/2016 12:34:18 PM   
needlesandpins


Posts: 3901
Status: offline 		News flash;

I don't need you too. It's Greek BTW, and Bradford, where Doncaster is no where near, is in Yorkshire

You see my profile does what it says on the tin. Quite clearly it states exactly what I'm here for, and what I'm not here for. It's mine, so it's not up for debate, just the same as what I wear is not up for debate, and is not a come on for any random bloke.

You have pointed out one flaw of this dated site though; it doesn't do the auto update of ages. I'm actually 44.

You see, not only would it be really poor form to comment on my profile in public, in actual fact what you have done already is, but it would be shear arrogance when your opinion hasn't been asked for in the first place.

Needles

_____________________________

I deserved better. Not than you, but from you.

(in reply to NorthernGent1)
Profile   Post #: 1540
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