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RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 6:34:03 AM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

In turkey kink is illegal AND WILL GET YOU KILLED!!! Do not under any circumstances tell this man (especially if he's muslim) anything about kink or tying up!!!!! You can legally be stoned to death in the street & no one could do anything about it. Your family if you are UK or american could even be prohibited getting your body back. Frankly ishocked beyond words you were even able to access this site from turkey


Please educate yourself beyond your silly American notions of what "Muslim" countries are like before you go of and spout idiotic nonsense when you don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about.

What in the world would give you the idiotic and bizarre idea that stoning is legal in Turkey, when that's not only blatantly false, but it also hasn't been true at any time in recent memory?

Turkey is a modern country, that doesn't follow Sharia law, being kinky isn't at all illegal there. And even IF it actually was... there isn't a chance in hell they'd stone a person to death for it...

Considering business contacts as recent as monday are my frame of reference where I can deal over the phone all I want but must either travel with a man or have men pick up my goods...I don't give a crap how modern they claim to be!! Hell in denver modern, forward thinking blah blah blah something as simple as pride fest takes almost 500 police & security to put on. Let's forget matt shepard murdered & hung on a fence just for the suspicion of being gay. Oh so modern & forward thinking are also the issues encountered by local kink & swinger clubs. Every month or so they are dealing with some license or rule or permit that might force them to move once again.
So what was that you were yapping about modern society being safe? Your...our own "modern city" kink has to be kept in the closet...the middle east be open & tell a man with obvious red flag hang ups you're kink?? Are you fucking nuts!!!
Every day of the week I will support being open & honest about sexuality...when that will not harm yourself or others. My experience with turkey, she's risking a legally sanctioned & non consentual beating possibly to death demanding kink from an obviously repressed guy.

Edit to add: OP even as much as she's claiming modern safe blah blah blah questions his reaction enough to not say anything!!

< Message edited by theRose4U -- 11/2/2012 6:47:50 AM >


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(in reply to UllrsIshtar)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 6:42:22 AM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LonDom61

quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar


quote:

ORIGINAL: theRose4U

In turkey kink is illegal AND WILL GET YOU KILLED!!! Do not under any circumstances tell this man (especially if he's muslim) anything about kink or tying up!!!!! You can legally be stoned to death in the street & no one could do anything about it. ...


Please educate yourself beyond your silly American notions of what "Muslim" countries are like before you go of and spout idiotic nonsense when you don't have the slightest idea what you're talking about.

What in the world would give you the idiotic and bizarre idea that stoning is legal in Turkey, when that's not only blatantly false, but it also hasn't been true at any time in recent memory?

Very true Ull.

If you define recent as 8 years. And if there haven`t been others since this one.


Turkey is a modern country, that doesn't follow Sharia law
, being kinky isn't at all illegal there. And even IF it actually was... there isn't a chance in hell they'd stone a person to death for it...


Yeah, Rose. How DARE you make a 2 minute forum post without doing a couple of hours or more of online research first!


ahem

I did some research. Took me about 20 minutes to find the following, and more:


Mist: I will take your word for it about not eating people. But regarding stoning...


Until 2003 or so It WAS LEGAL. They changed the law to qualify as a modern country worthy of entering the EU. That made them one of the TWO Muslim countries in which it is illegal.

So Rose...how could you possibly have failed to realize that, though stoning is legal in all other Muslim countries in the world except one...it isnt in Turkey.

But it is still practiced by the people.



NY Times, 13 Jul 2003, 'Honor Killings' Defy Turkish Efforts to End Them

YAYLIM, Turkey — Last month a woman named Cemse Allak was buried in a corner of a municipal cemetery here. Ms. Allak, unmarried and pregnant, had died from a stoning.


Villagers and local lawyers said Ms. Allak -- as well as the man who had made her pregnant -- had been killed to restore the honor of their families.

For seven months after her stoning, Ms. Allak lay semi-conscious, her skull crushed, unable to move or speak. Relatives visited once, in the beginning, to tell the hospital staff that they could not pay for her care. The fetus inside Ms. Allak died six weeks after the attack.
When Ms. Allak died on June 7, no one from her family claimed her body, and none of her relatives attended the funeral.

The death of Ms. Allak, 35, underscores the distance between legislative pronouncements emanating from Ankara, Turkey's modern capital, and the sometimes grim, medieval realities of everyday life in other parts of the country.

...

The stoning of Mr. Acil and Ms. Allak appeared to follow in the tradition of recm, which is, according to villagers here, the religiously sanctioned trial and stoning of a dishonored woman or man by an entire village.

http://plancksconstant.org/blog1/2011/02/throwing_stones_in_turkey.html

= ==

With the Islamists’ Rise to Power, Turkey Became the World’s Leading Hotspot of Honour Killings
Tuesday, 10 April 2012 01:41 M. A. Khan

To educated Muslims, honor killing has nothing to do with Islam and Turkey is the only "role model" Islamic country, because in all other Muslim countries, honor killing occurs. Unfortunately, after the Islamists came to power in 2002 and opened the gates of gradual Islamization of Turkey, after 8 decades of strict secular rule, Turkey has risen to be the world's "number one honor killing country", with a killing rate 5 times higher than that of Pakistan, known to be notorious for honor killing.

The Quran and hadiths prohibit adultery, apostasy, fornication, and homosexuality etc. And Muslim societies, since the days of Prophet Muhammad, have punished such offenders, normally by killing them, in perfect harmony with sanctions of the Quran, Sunnah and the Sharia.

http://islam-watch.org/authors/65-khan/984-with-the-islamists-rise-to-power-turkey-became-the-worlds-leading-hotspot-of-honour-killings.html

==================================================

You might say -well, thats for adultery. not kink- But the prohibition includes homosexuality and fornication. Basically, if its not required, its forbidden. You think the shit we do could never count, in the perspective of a Muslim fundamentalist, as fornication .qm

Its not the government. They have been anti-stoning for almost 10 years now. So much for Ull and her -recent memory-. Its the people who havent yet gotten the memo.

Of course that is Muslim on Muslim violence. Our friend here is from Norway. And her sweetie, she has told us, is not Muslim either.

We know that Muslims never get violent to impose their values on non-Muslims. Right

I have been guilty, above, of bringing Islam into this conversation. This post too. But I had to refute Ull and her high handed flaming of Rose. And set the record straight.

And yes, it is relevant from the standpoint of what if she is outed.

But lets get back to the OP. She wants to know how to deal with her boyfriend.



Lol lon stop it, your cranium is turning me on

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to LonDom61)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 6:43:28 AM   
flyhumbleguy


Posts: 162
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After reading two pages of comments, I'm getting the vibe that he is gay and that you are in denial. Does he have a big bank account or is the opportunity for international travel making you want to stick around? I'm not hearing much else that is worthwhile for such. All I'm hearing is fear and being scared which are not things that you want to base a long-term relationship on unless it is due to consensual roleplay and involves a safeword...things that it doesn't sound like you both have come anywhere close to discussing. Somebody else said run for the hills...I couldn't agree more. Look at why you are in such denial and are willing to settle.

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 6:53:47 AM   
mnottertail


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Joined: 11/3/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sinfulneeds

i told him last night i had to talk to him... but i cant get any words out.. cus i dont know what to say ...
i have no idea what so ever to say to him.. so he sit there for 30 min looking at me and waiting for me to speak .. and then i say ,.. nevermind..


Exactly what I told you not to do.   You eat an elephant one bite at a time.   Well, every bit of sound advice given you has some pathetic excuse of why it won't work, and you have no idea what to say or do, and as DS summarized in post #53 we are now down to two options....

Live alone or become a lesbian.  If you are going to refuse to GET it, that is what is on the cart.

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Profile   Post #: 64
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 8:41:24 AM   
chatterbox24


Posts: 2182
Joined: 1/22/2012
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Yikes. No amount of talk is gonna help. I think your half hour of silence was VERY GOOD. I wouldn't pursue it AT ALL. Guy doesnt care to get your rocks off, doesnt care simply. Rigid, and stiff about sex only one to two times a week. DOesnt want to talk about sex period? SOunds like sex is almost just a act of nature to him, which is almost shameful to him or is shameful.
Sounds like a man who just goes through motions, not caring about what you get back, he doesnt even have that mind function. You woman, you cook, clean, do laundry, make my life easy. I am man, I eat, enjoy the clean house, wear the clean clothes, and use you for a cum container when I feel like it.
Setting yourself up by staying, a life full of resentment, due to not only sexual dissatisfaction but emotional as well. A combo one day to surely make you want to slice your wrist in the future.
GET THE **** out of there. Thank me later.

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Profile   Post #: 65
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:06:40 AM   
absolutchocolat


Posts: 1392
Status: offline
roch, that was kind of a joke...but porn that you make counts as "watching porn", at least to me.

it was more of a silly response to a situation that seems, for all intents and purposes, almost a hopeless one. i mean, the OP has literally said this guy is not open to suggestion in any way -- no talking, no porn, nothing. i myself find it a bit hard to believe, but i'll remain hopeful that some suggestion eventually works. carry on.

< Message edited by absolutchocolat -- 11/2/2012 9:10:24 AM >

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:07:53 AM   
mnottertail


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Not if you are doing it blindfolded........just sayin.......look at that big blue thing he wears over his eyes.....

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Profile   Post #: 67
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:13:17 AM   
absolutchocolat


Posts: 1392
Status: offline
no peeking at all?! i just don't have the willpower for that. i gots ta see.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:36:32 AM   
BurntKitty


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Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
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OP is Norwegian & loves giving blow jobs. I think the obvious answer is for her move to Minn & become Ron's BJ giving submissive.

Case closed. Next.

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Profile   Post #: 69
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:43:36 AM   
Aswad


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No fair. Why does Ron get all the fun?

IWYW,
— Aswad.


_____________________________

"If God saw what any of us did that night, he didn't seem to mind.
From then on I knew: God doesn't make the world this way.
We do.
" -- Rorschack, Watchmen.


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Profile   Post #: 70
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:50:10 AM   
sinfulneeds


Posts: 53
Joined: 4/12/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

No relationship can function without honesty.


I beg to differ, most relationships can't function with honesty.

OP, I think you can expect this incompatibility to be continuing. As he does not know what gets you excited, you have also not said what get's him excited.

nothing seems to get him excited .... maybe he just dont like me ..

(in reply to cloudboy)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:51:13 AM   
BurntKitty


Posts: 3340
Joined: 9/7/2010
From: Here To Eternity.
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He speaks Norwegian. If you speak Norwegian as well, then OP has her choice of toppy types here. (I'm of Norwegian decent, love giving BJs, but I can't speak a lick of it. Pun intended.)

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Profile   Post #: 72
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:51:47 AM   
absolutchocolat


Posts: 1392
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hands aswad a blowjob

see, now everybody's happy.


(in reply to BurntKitty)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:53:05 AM   
mnottertail


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Med snuse unter luffa, og smult im det haar...reise up alle gutter, Kong Haakon, er her.

And yes, al-Aswad, I am pre-ashamed of my spelling before you correct it.

LOL.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


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Profile   Post #: 74
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:56:10 AM   
sinfulneeds


Posts: 53
Joined: 4/12/2008
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wow .. so many posts made here while i was out ..
and sadly .. i think so many of them sais something i should listen to ..

i have alot of thinking to do im afraid ,.. ,.,. oh my.. what am i going to do...:(

(in reply to sinfulneeds)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 9:56:49 AM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
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eeerrr....my daughter has been to Turkey. According to her it was just like the U.S. She had no problems at all there. It's a modern country. It's nothing like Iraq or Iran. She didn't have to be with men to travel, she didn't have to cover her entire body except when she visited the mosques and just about everyone spoke English. Let's not lump all "Muslim" countries as exactly the same.


ETA: Just because he doesn't like bjs does not make him gay. I know a lot of men who don't like them because their penis is simply too sensitive to it or it just doesn't do anything for them. There are women who don't like cunnilingus. Again, doesn't make them gay. They just don't like it for the same reasons.

As for the op, if you can't even talk to the man you are engaged to, then your marriage will never ever ever work. Either get over it and learn to talk to him or get out now while the getting is good. I can't imagine being married to someone that I can't even talk to.


< Message edited by littlewonder -- 11/2/2012 10:05:46 AM >


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Profile   Post #: 76
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 10:02:39 AM   
sinfulneeds


Posts: 53
Joined: 4/12/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

eeerrr....my daughter has been to Turkey. According to her it was just like the U.S. She had no problems at all there. It's a modern country. It's nothing like Iraq or Iran. She didn't have to be with men to travel, she didn't have to cover her entire body except when she visited the mosques and just about everyone spoke English. Let's not lump all "Muslim" countries as exactly the same.


thank you. this is also the way i see this country.

(in reply to littlewonder)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 10:12:04 AM   
Aswad


Posts: 9374
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BurntKitty

He speaks Norwegian. If you speak Norwegian as well, then OP has her choice of toppy types here. (I'm of Norwegian decent, love giving BJs, but I can't speak a lick of it. Pun intended.)


Burde egentlig si seg selv at jeg, som født og oppvokst i det ganske land, snakker flytende norsk, frk. BurntKitty...

quote:

ORIGINAL: absolutchocolat

hands aswad a blowjob

see, now everybody's happy.


Whee. We keep this up, and we'll have world peace in no time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

And yes, al-Aswad, I am pre-ashamed of my spelling before you correct it.


Nothing to be ashamed of there, Ron.

It's a bit Shakespeare, if you get my meaning, s'all.

IWYW,
— Aswad.


_____________________________

"If God saw what any of us did that night, he didn't seem to mind.
From then on I knew: God doesn't make the world this way.
We do.
" -- Rorschack, Watchmen.


(in reply to BurntKitty)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 10:12:47 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
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I've been to Turkey several times in recent years and I find it a very friendly, relaxing country. My (female) friend and I walked around in shorts and t-shirts, as did most of the other tourists, and no-one batted an eye. We covered up to go into a mosque to look around, but everywhere else it felt very western.



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Profile   Post #: 79
RE: need some help with my man - 11/2/2012 10:19:20 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

  al-Aswad
It's a bit Shakespeare, if you get my meaning, s'all.


As you know, the smattering of Norwegian I know comes from around the 1880s to 1900s.   I haven't gotten much NyNorske.

Remember, I was at:
Hvordan har det til until you changed me to Hvordan har du det. 


_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 80
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