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I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:13:32 PM   
OsideGirl


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From: United States
Status: offline 		My ex did a number of mosaics in 1/4" gemstone tiles. One of them was a nude of me from the back. He still has it and it has been a bone of contention in his marriage. He's had an offer to purchase that piece and he's asked me if it's okay.

So, part of me feels like no one knows it's me, but another part of me feels exposed. (I never expected it to be for sale) He's offered it to me but even though he and Master know each other, I kind of feel that Master would feel disrespected to have it in our house.

I don't know how I feel about it.



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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:15:49 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Get it from him and destroy it,that's what I'd do

< Message edited by Kana -- 12/2/2012 5:16:02 PM >

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:23:17 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		I would ask your Master how he feels about it. If he says he does not want it in the home and you don't want it to be sold, either find it a new home with someone you know well and you would like to have it or destroy it.

When the ex and I broke up, he had given me back a few things. I felt odd about keeping them in case I was ever in a relationship ever again and so I destroyed it all since there was no one else I would have wanted to have them. With stuff from my deceased husband, I have kept a few things but they are put away for safekeeping for my daughter later in life and some stuff I've already given to her. That could be something also....if you have children and you think it might be something to give them when they are older, put it away for safekeeping until that time.



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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:23:29 PM   
lizi


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Joined: 2/1/2009
Status: offline 		I wouldn't let it be purchased by another, it seems like it belongs with you. Talk with your Master about the fact that you don't want it with someone else, see what he says. If he doesn't want it displayed in your home with him, that's fine, ask if he'd be ok with it wrapped and covered and stuck in a closet.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:25:33 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

... He's offered it to me but even though he and Master know each other, I kind of feel that Master would feel disrespected to have it in our house...

I don't know how I feel about it.




What Kana said, but what I quoted sounds as if you haven't discussed it with your Master. Does he even know?

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:31:33 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		Master has been out all day and the ex emailed me this morning.

It's one of those things that I'm trying to wrap my head around how I feel before I bring it up because I know he'll ask what I'm thinking.

Destroying it kind of feels like trying to wipe out part of my life. I was always content for the piece to stay with him, but I can understand where his wife is coming from too. She's got a portrait of me and three of his books dedicated to me sitting in her house.

ETA: It's a piece made up of almost 3000 turquoise 1/4" tiles.

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 12/2/2012 5:32:08 PM >

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:36:09 PM   
hlen5


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Master has been out all day and the ex emailed me this morning.

It's one of those things that I'm trying to wrap my head around how I feel before I bring it up because I know he'll ask what I'm thinking.

Destroying it kind of feels like trying to wipe out part of my life. I was always content for the piece to stay with him, but I can understand where his wife is coming from too. She's got a portrait of me and three of his books dedicated to me sitting in her house.

ETA: It's a piece made up of almost 3000 turquoise 1/4" tiles.


Maybe your Master will like it as simply as art. If he doesn't care for it, it could be tucked away, like lizi suggested.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:40:10 PM   
LaTigresse


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quote:

ORIGINAL: hlen5

Maybe your Master will like it as simply as art. If he doesn't care for it, it could be tucked away, like lizi suggested.


This.

It wouldn't phase me to have it in the house. I love art and, if it's something I find beautiful, the origin wouldn't be an issue.

We all have a past. I would never ask for it to be destroyed.


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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:40:40 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

Master has been out all day and the ex emailed me this morning.

It's one of those things that I'm trying to wrap my head around how I feel before I bring it up because I know he'll ask what I'm thinking.

Destroying it kind of feels like trying to wipe out part of my life. I was always content for the piece to stay with him, but I can understand where his wife is coming from too. She's got a portrait of me and three of his books dedicated to me sitting in her house.

ETA: It's a piece made up of almost 3000 turquoise 1/4" tiles.


It does sound like a piece of art.

If your Master wants to keep it, would you still be uncomfortable with it? If he doesn't want it around, would a photograph of it (or saving the pieces in a jar, or whatever) be enough to keep from feeling you're trying to wipe out part of your life? They sound like two separate issues to me.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:45:58 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		I would not be uncomfortable keeping it. I just don't want him to be uncomfortable with keeping it.

I do think it's an incredible piece. It's done using the variations in the natural color of stone, so it's subtle. You almost don't see it and then when you do, it kind of stops you. He did about 10 pieces like that. They're beautiful (getting past that one of them is me).

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:48:00 PM   
evesgrden


Posts: 597
Joined: 6/9/2012
Status: offline 		You don't know what you think till you hear what you have to say. You'll know more when you talk it over with your Master.

That said... don't destroy art. If it's a beautiful piece of work, and it sounds like it is, then if you must, tuck it away somewhere and perhaps it can be appreciated by future generations who don't know you, or your master or your ex, and just know that they love the art itself. So much art has been destroyed over the centuries due to war, or simple human nature which put insecurities against.. art. Stow it somewhere if you must, but don't destroy it.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 5:59:45 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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Joined: 1/23/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I would not be uncomfortable keeping it. I just don't want him to be uncomfortable with keeping it.

I do think it's an incredible piece. It's done using the variations in the natural color of stone, so it's subtle. You almost don't see it and then when you do, it kind of stops you. He did about 10 pieces like that. They're beautiful (getting past that one of them is me).



It really does sound incredible.

From how you've talked about your Master, I'm sure you can trust him to be honest about whether he wants to keep it. He thinks you're a thing of beauty, and there's a piece of art showing you as a thing of beauty from a time before you both had the opportunity of meeting each other so the worry about his discomfort may be for nothing. But as I said before, he'll tell you. :)

(And I'm being oh so careful not to say I'd love to see it! lol)


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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:03:14 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14442
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		I think that's part of the question for me.

Master and I were platonic friends while I was with my ex. They know each other. It's not an abstract of some other guy.

ETA: I'd post a picture of the piece, but I don't want to out my ex by someone following the picture out to him.

< Message edited by OsideGirl -- 12/2/2012 6:04:21 PM >

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:07:57 PM   
ARIES83


Posts: 3648
Status: offline 		Oside...
Just tell your master, let him deside...

-Aries

< Message edited by ARIES83 -- 12/2/2012 6:08:14 PM >

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:23:31 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		Nobody has said "Take the sell it option," so I will.
If someone wants to pay for it, it's going to a good home, right?  And the art won't be destroyed.
And that's what you can remember.
(Would the artist be willing to share the sale price? Especially if said cash goes to a charity of YOUR choice?)

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:24:55 PM   
MissToYouRedux


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Joined: 1/23/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

I think that's part of the question for me.

Master and I were platonic friends while I was with my ex. They know each other. It's not an abstract of some other guy.

ETA: I'd post a picture of the piece, but I don't want to out my ex by someone following the picture out to him.



See, dominants take note. This is a perfect example of how subs try to protect their Masters, just as Masters protect their submissives.

He knows you were with the other guy. I know for women seeing something tangible is much different than being aware of it in the abstract, but generally guys already have the visual in their heads. Tell him, show him and trust his response. In any event *you* aren't making him uncomfortable, even if the image does.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:30:24 PM   
FelineFae


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Status: offline 		You could ask your ex to donate it or you could donate it.


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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 6:45:36 PM   
poise


Posts: 9509
Joined: 7/3/2010
Status: offline 		Surprise surprise! I'm with Mr. Hughes on this one.
It's been a bone of contention in your exes marriage.
It could become an issue for your marriage, regardless of what is said today.
I say both you and your ex should celebrate this part of your past by selling it
to someone who seems to be very fond of it, and then celebrate the future with
your current spouses by using the money for some special occassion together.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 7:39:02 PM   
LanceHughes


Posts: 4737
Joined: 2/12/2004
Status: offline 		Right on, poise!
The way you phrased it reminds me of selling my wedding ring and using the proceeds for..... well....a celebration.

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RE: I have an odd situation - 12/2/2012 7:56:37 PM   
LookieNoNookie


Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

My ex did a number of mosaics in 1/4" gemstone tiles. One of them was a nude of me from the back. He still has it and it has been a bone of contention in his marriage. He's had an offer to purchase that piece and he's asked me if it's okay.

So, part of me feels like no one knows it's me, but another part of me feels exposed. (I never expected it to be for sale) He's offered it to me but even though he and Master know each other, I kind of feel that Master would feel disrespected to have it in our house.

I don't know how I feel about it.




I'll take it.

No money needs to change hands so no one feels dirty.

(I'm here to help).

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