find a non pro dominatrix

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

find a non pro dominatrix

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> find a non pro dominatrix

Page: [1] 2 3 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 11:50:30 AM

slavejohn1234

Posts: 23
Joined: 4/1/2008
Status: offline

How can i find a non professional dominant in London Uk without going to clubs? I seek to be taught what the cane is really about but cannot afford pro domme fees. Thanks john

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 11:54:42 AM

RumpusParable

Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline

Go out, be social, meet males and females, make lots of friends, be honest about your kink interests without being pushy or creepy and eventually you'll find a female who already likes or is willing to try caning.

Same as meeting a female who like J-Pop concerts or skydiving or whatever.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to slavejohn1234)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 11:54:46 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

The term Dominatrix usually refers to someone that is pro.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to slavejohn1234)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 11:59:10 AM

VioletViolence

Posts: 169
Joined: 1/30/2012
Status: offline

It's simple really, but it's a concept that most men seem unable to grasp. Either you pay in money or you pay in time and attention. If you don't want a pro-domme, then you must approach the lifestyle Dommes as REGULAR PEOPLE, not as a way to get your kink fix. As you get to know these ladies, if you find one in particular whom you like, then you mention to her that you'd like to get to know her better and see where it goes. Yup, just like in regular vanilla dating. You need to get the latex/leather clad bitch with a whip out of your head and start remembering that Dominant women are WOMEN. You treat them the same as you would any other woman (hopefully that means with respect, courtesy and politeness).

(in reply to slavejohn1234)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:14:00 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

dude, you want to meet non-pros without going to clubs? WHat about attending munches? Seriously, the best way to meet people (regardless of kink/non-kink/whatever) is to step out from behind the computer and go where the people are.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:14:58 PM

SophiaMaam

Posts: 20
Joined: 11/21/2012
Status: offline

If all you're looking for is a good solid caning, going to a prodomme is likely to be CHEAPER in the long run than going to munches (spending money on meals and drinks) multiple times in the hopes of meeting someone....taking that someone you meet out on a couple dates (which even if going dutch will cost you for meals, drinks, museum tickets, movie tickets, bus passes, etc) plus flowers, maybe a small gift - all of which adds up fast, with no guarantee that she'll ultimately like you enough to want to get let you get naked and do to you what you want done.

With a pro, you know the cost up front and you know you'll be getting the service you want. It'll take a lot less time and effort to find one compatible to boot.

Or were you just hoping that this discussion would get you someone willing to give you a pity beating?

< Message edited by SophiaMaam -- 12/7/2012 12:15:49 PM >

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:16:17 PM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

attention

****ing hell, nothing in life comes easy, does it?

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:17:10 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

I love your hair. *jealous*

/hijack

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to SophiaMaam)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:23:45 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejohn1234
How can i find a non professional dominant in London Uk without going to clubs? I seek to be taught what the cane is really about but cannot afford pro domme fees. Thanks john

Hi John,

Pretty much everyone, male or female, straight or gay, looking for a partner of any sort -- spouse, fling, platonic friend -- needs to bring at least one of three things:

1. Money
2. Personality
3. Looks

If you don't have (1), and think that's unlikely to change, then focus on developing (2) and (3). Become better read, do more volunteer work, spend more time at the gym. Also, it is perfectly possible to recruit kinksters from the vanilla dating pool -- at least, it is if you're looking for a relationship. If you just want a caning partner, you will find things more difficult, because, as another poster mentioned, women enjoy attention.

Bottom line: how much of yourself are you willing to give?

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to slavejohn1234)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:44:15 PM

RumpusParable

Posts: 1923
Joined: 7/7/2005
From: NYC now!
Status: offline

As I just said in the inappropriate private message you just sent me:

Dude, you would need to pay me as a professional.

Read and attempt to understand the replies to your post.

_____________________________

Relationships come and go, but plastination is forever.

I generally use fast-reply. If directing my post at someone specific I will indicate so.

Minimal summary: Artist, Disabled Veteran, Vegan, Pornographer, and Agender dominant female.

(in reply to RedMagic1)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 12:52:43 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Hello A/all,

Let me echo Ms. VioletViolence. Men here on CM have an unfortunate tendency to jump over all of the necessary first steps in the courtship process.

NOTE: I use the word courtship because my limited Tech School education does not provide me a better one.

Expect your search to take TIME. Here on CM if you contact a woman that interests you, start with... Dear Ms VioletViolence, I am responding to your profile because of what you said about a tent and a fire. Be polite! A polite hello is still the rule.

HINT: Reading the whole profile is more than marginally useful.
HINT: Do not, repeat DO NOT open correspondence with.. Please spank me! or... Let's...
Nuff Said?

Munches and other face to face gatherings are a good place to start too. My only problem is that I can not always figure out who is dominant and who is submissive.

Be patient. Get out there and get known.

Respectfully,
Mike
SnowRanger

_____________________________

You can't help where you were born; and, you may not have much to say about where you die; but, you can and you should try to pass the days in between as a good man.
Anton Myrer Once an Eagle

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 1:21:06 PM

theRose4U

Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline

quote:

Munches and other face to face gatherings are a good place to start too. My only problem is that I can not always figure out who is dominant and who is submissive.

Well the ones with the large capes & giant D on the chest are dominants, the ones with eye masks & small capes are subs

Otherwise, well said!

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 1:40:56 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Thanks Ms. Rose,

I have not seen these Giant Ds and eye masks yet. Well Twain said that the end of the world would take ten years to get here. ;-)

SR

(in reply to theRose4U)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 1:47:47 PM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

NO CAPES!!!

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to theRose4U)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 1:47:53 PM

SnowRanger

Posts: 503
Joined: 5/25/2008
From: Sinsinnati
Status: offline

Hey slave john! Aproppos of nothing what ever, there is a concurrent thread on Ask-A-Mistress posted by a LadyMari. That IS London UK and not London Kentucky... ...Right????

(in reply to SnowRanger)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 3:21:19 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejohn1234

How can i find a non professional dominant in London Uk without going to clubs? I seek to be taught what the cane is really about but cannot afford pro domme fees. Thanks john

Yellow Pages...under "Non Pro Domme".

(It's in the "N" section).

(in reply to slavejohn1234)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 4:27:20 PM

naughtynick81

Posts: 890
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence

It's simple really, but it's a concept that most men seem unable to grasp. Either you pay in money or you pay in time and attention. If you don't want a pro-domme, then you must approach the lifestyle Dommes as REGULAR PEOPLE, not as a way to get your kink fix. As you get to know these ladies, if you find one in particular whom you like, then you mention to her that you'd like to get to know her better and see where it goes. Yup, just like in regular vanilla dating. You need to get the latex/leather clad bitch with a whip out of your head and start remembering that Dominant women are WOMEN. You treat them the same as you would any other woman (hopefully that means with respect, courtesy and politeness).

quote:

It's simple really, but it's a concept that most men seem unable to grasp.

Golly gosh, this is the type of domme that I would just laugh at in her face if I ever saw her in person.

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 4:44:52 PM

fetisheden

Posts: 274
Joined: 1/25/2011
Status: offline

this is so true

quote:

ORIGINAL: VioletViolence

It's simple really, but it's a concept that most men seem unable to grasp. Either you pay in money or you pay in time and attention. If you don't want a pro-domme, then you must approach the lifestyle Dommes as REGULAR PEOPLE, not as a way to get your kink fix. As you get to know these ladies, if you find one in particular whom you like, then you mention to her that you'd like to get to know her better and see where it goes. Yup, just like in regular vanilla dating. You need to get the latex/leather clad bitch with a whip out of your head and start remembering that Dominant women are WOMEN. You treat them the same as you would any other woman (hopefully that means with respect, courtesy and politeness).

_____________________________

http://losangelesblackdominatrix.com
http://findomme.blogspot.com
http://blackmailfetish.blogspot.com
www.twitter.com/fetisheden

(in reply to VioletViolence)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 4:48:30 PM

naughtynick81

Posts: 890
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline

If a male made any generalisations towards women, he would be shunned for it.

It's funny how it's anti social to generalize women while it's not if a woman generalises men.

A round of applause for female favouritism.

< Message edited by naughtynick81 -- 12/7/2012 4:56:12 PM >

(in reply to fetisheden)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: find a non pro dominatrix - 12/7/2012 5:51:18 PM

VioletViolence

Posts: 169
Joined: 1/30/2012
Status: offline

Well Nick, you can laugh if you like. Doesn't change the fact that if a guy doesn't want to pay for a service then he's stuck with having to relate to women as people. A terrifying thought for you I'm sure, but that's the world we live in.

(in reply to naughtynick81)

Profile

Post #: 20