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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 4:13:55 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
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From: Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: alildifferent
To me a slave shouldn't have too many contacts with the outside world. A slave does as it's master wants regardless of it's will if one goes by history. Having friends and family one can escape to is an easy way to escape slavery. Submitting is a volunteering thing. People who submit should not be cut off from friends and people who like them. Submission is a gift not forced.

Out of curiosity, why shouldn't a slave have too many contacts with the outside world? Traditionally (since you groove on that) slaves have done ALL MANNER OF THINGS in the outside world because... you know... that's where the shit that 'serving their master' happened at. So what's your rationale for that?

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 5:07:38 PM

littlewonder

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Besides if a slave has no access with the rest of the world, how does the slave run errands and get stuff done for it's Master/Mistress? Does it just stay home locked up all day in a cage? If so that means the Dom is actually the slave does it not? He now has to do all the running around and getting stuff all done, has to clean and feed and take care of the caged slave, etc...how exactly is the slave serving anyone at all?

If I were a Domme I'd be like fuck this shit! What use is it to have a slave who does nothing at all??

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 5:54:04 PM

searching4mysir

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quote:

ORIGINAL: alildifferent

To me a slave shouldn't have too many contacts with the outside world. A slave does as it's master wants regardless of it's will if one goes by history. Having friends and family one can escape to is an easy way to escape slavery. Submitting is a volunteering thing. People who submit should not be cut off from friends and people who like them. Submission is a gift not forced.

Since slavery as in the days of old is illegal, all it requires now is for the slave to cease consenting. Then any action the Master takes against the slave is illegal.

If slavery is consensual, any dom that worries about escape is not only an ass but dangerous.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 8:49:58 PM

Vickiepooh

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Joined: 12/18/2012
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He said I could have contact with family and friends but no Doms and i dont think he likes me even talking to my male friends. he would consider them if he could monitor me for a while. He doesn't live in my state but says he will visit before he completes the consideration and moves me to where he is.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 8:55:49 PM

littlewonder

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I guess if you like it, whatever works for ya. I'd hate to imagine what would happen if you two lived together. Have you two ever even met in person yet? If not I don't even know why he's your Master yet...but that's me.

My daughter's boyfriend tried to pull that crap on her. He got angry every time she hung out with her male friends. What did she do? She left him.

After a few days, he called her, crying for her to come back. She did only under the agreement that he'd get over his jealousy and deal with it that she has male friends. Since that day he hasn't said a word. He knows if he does, she'll be gone in a heartbeat again, and this time permanently.

So yeah....good luck to ya.

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 12/26/2012 8:56:11 PM >

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/26/2012 8:59:12 PM

JeffBC

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quote:

ORIGINAL: searching4mysir
If slavery is consensual, any dom that worries about escape is not only an ass but dangerous.

As is always true such sweeping generalizations are prone to error. At one point I would have agreed with you until I was presented with a real life couple that contradicted my assumptions. This is the sort of statement which makes me say, "M/s is still barely tolerated in the BDSM community despite the way it's been glorified in the US scene."

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 8:35:23 AM

hiswishes

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I would like to thank you for posting this. I did not know it is such a common order to be made by a Dom. That helps. It scared me when He had made that demand.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 8:55:39 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

He said I could have contact with family and friends but no Doms and i dont think he likes me even talking to my male friends. he would consider them if he could monitor me for a while. He doesn't live in my state but says he will visit before he completes the consideration and moves me to where he is.

I hope that "consideration" means more than "cock-block you while he looks for someone local" but am not optimistic.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 9:01:00 AM

OsideGirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Vickiepooh

He said I could have contact with family and friends but no Doms and i dont think he likes me even talking to my male friends. he would consider them if he could monitor me for a while. He doesn't live in my state but says he will visit before he completes the consideration and moves me to where he is.

So, basically, you have a guy you've never met controlling what you do.

Then you're going to rip up your life and move in with a guy that you've met once.

Does that seem even remotely sane to you?

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 9:03:07 AM

MAINEiacMISTRESS

Posts: 1180
Joined: 9/12/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Besides if a slave has no access with the rest of the world, how does the slave run errands and get stuff done for it's Master/Mistress? Does it just stay home locked up all day in a cage? If so that means the Dom is actually the slave does it not? He now has to do all the running around and getting stuff all done, has to clean and feed and take care of the caged slave, etc...how exactly is the slave serving anyone at all?

If I were a Domme I'd be like fuck this shit! What use is it to have a slave who does nothing at all??

I have run into this situation many times, with "slaves" contacting Me wanting to be kept locked up 24/7...well bullshit to that. I don't clean up after others, I don't wait on others hand and foot, why would ANY self-respecting Dominant do so?
To Me a "slave" is one who tends to his/her Owner's needs; it is a Devotional thing. CONSENSUAL Devotion.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 9:15:20 AM

MistressSyMoane

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Joined: 11/4/2012
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: Vickiepooh

He said I could have contact with family and friends but no Doms and i dont think he likes me even talking to my male friends. he would consider them if he could monitor me for a while. He doesn't live in my state but says he will visit before he completes the consideration and moves me to where he is.

So, basically, you have a guy you've never met controlling what you do.

Then you're going to rip up your life and move in with a guy that you've met once.

Does that seem even remotely sane to you?

I gotta agree with this response. There is NO WAY I am going to tell any potential sub/slave what she can or can't do UNTIL she is in my home. Even then, I wouldn't cut her off from contact with other people. This guy sounds more like an abusive situation is coming your way. It reminds me of the only "dom" I ever had. He did the same thing to me and the 7 years that followed were HORRIBLE! I can't tell you what to do but you do need to be careful with this one.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/27/2012 11:08:41 PM

tidbit5021

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Joined: 11/26/2012
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This seems very scary to me. If you do move to be with him, what is to stop him from you off from all contact with even your family? It sounds to me like this man has serious trust issues and a potentially dangerous need to control all of your actions (not only what you consent to).

Please be careful.

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RE: He Won't Let Me Talk To Others - 12/28/2012 12:32:48 AM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl
So, basically, you have a guy you've never met controlling what you do.
Then you're going to rip up your life and move in with a guy that you've met once.
Does that seem even remotely sane to you?

Yeah that.

Earlier on this thread I was pointing out that there were perfectly normal, understandable reasons for adjusting your property's social circle. This isn't one of them and VickiePooh's not property. I tried hard to come up with a sensible scenario here like... "What if Vickiepooh is the cheater type and they both know it?" But even then the right answer is to dump her like a hot potato rather than try to control that.

Of secondary concern to me beyond question of sanity above is what appears to be towering insecurity on his part. Honestly that just doesn't go with the word "dominant" in my mind. I wouldn't have a clue how to dominate someone from a position of weakness.

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Post #: 73