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LadyPact -> RE: How to filter the fakes? (12/28/2012 10:20:24 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: lizi
I'll preface my response by saying I remember your past threads under your old username. You have admitted in the past that you have abandonment issues, and in a couple of those threads someone had gone poof on you. I'm not sure that there are many men out there that can satisfy your contact needs, or are willing to try in the beginning stages of a relationship- it doesn't mean they are fake. If you reread your comment above, it has to do with you not receiving what you need...from a stranger at that point. It has nothing to do with that person being a fake Dominant. This thread is not about the universal application of some measure of fakeness, it has to do with what you need out of a relationship- therefore it has no connection to some group of people that everyone here can label as FAKE.
In other words, you have needs that you want to be met, the needs that you have don't pertain to everyone here on the site. Your standards of what is acceptable behavior from a prospective partner are yours, they are not some code of regulations. You'd have done better to approach this question from a personal point of view and ponder how you can find a good match for yourself, rather than paint everyone who doesn't live up to your standards of contact as being a fake.
You've been told this before, but it bears repeating...everyone has different standards and different needs. All you can do is try to find a good match for yourself. It doesn't seem as though practice is giving you a better filtering process if you are still struggling with the same issues you struggled with all along. It might be good to remember that there is no shortcut. A relationship is a time consuming process. You have to put in the time and effort to see if someone matches up to what you want or not. There isn't any simple litmus test of fakeness, because it's personal to every member on here. You were given good advice on your old threads, I'd go over those again and see if you can't get some of your answers there.
Thank you for typing out this post, lizi. I was sitting here last night trying to come up with a way that I could reply to the original without sounding rude. You did a much better job than I would have.
OP, there's nothing wrong with wanting what you want, but just because somebody else doesn't want the same thing doesn't make them fake. Being so narrow in the view of real and fake comes across as being very shallow. By your definition, I'm fake because I don't want what you want.
Last time around, you were encouraged to hit some munches and things. I hope that is going well for you.
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