RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it only a slave's job?

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 1:23:28 PM

WomanlyWiles

Posts: 166
Joined: 3/14/2012
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I guess I'm one of those old hags on the lookout for a younger man that i have no hope of attracting otherwise. That's me told.

(in reply to spideycool69)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 1:31:12 PM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69
I've been contacted by Mistresses on some occassions and I started to ask myself that do Mistresses really do that? Or that task is just reserved for slaves? I mean I've always pictured Them attracting slaves not contacting them.

I've been contacted by women (or maybe better said "female profiles") over the years. Usually it's been because of something I posted here, or a comment like "nice waterfall," because when I've had a pic up, it's shown me hiking next to a waterfall. I've also received more spammy emails, which I've marked as spam and reported.

Something to think about: I've only written back to maybe half the women who have written to me, even if I thought they were really women. Would you write to anyone and everyone? The two dommes above me who said they sometimes write men are RumpusParable and LittleMsMary. I'd respond to both of them, because I've seen how they think, and they are sensible. But LittleMsMary's great "dat ass" shot probably wouldn't be enough, just by itself. I'm interested in making serious connections with compatible individuals.

This might sound backward, or excessively zen, but if you stop chasing women's bodies, they are much more likely to write you, and to write you back if you make the first move.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to spideycool69)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 1:46:32 PM

MadameM4U

Posts: 62
Joined: 4/23/2012
Status: offline

I am very sure I am "a genuine dom" and I know I am not in this "for the money" although I am "older" and could even be thought to be "very unattractive" by some.

I have made first contact with some submissive males but definitely receive more initial emails than I send.

So, watch out because you may get struck by lightning!

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4asiansub

From the sheer numbers i would say not very likely. The ration of female dominant to male masochist on this site, is anywhere around 1/100, to 1/300. Most of female dominants are in it for the money, or alternatively just some older (or very unattractive women) in hope to get younger/much better looking guys (which without it being female dominant they never would, quite a smart strategy). I'm not saying all of them are like this. But you have more chance to get struck by a lightning, than to get contacted by a genuine dom that doesn't fall into the above categories.

Just my 2c.

Peace.

(in reply to looking4asiansub)

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Post #: 23

RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 3:19:57 PM

naughtynick81

Posts: 890
Joined: 3/23/2007
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Like on any site, it's usually the women getting fuck tons of messages while most men get little.

I think this all boils down to old school traditions that people don't want to give up. It has nothing to do with BDSM. Many women want men to give up their traditional privileges while they get to keep theirs.

Many women see it as a "pick and choose" game when it comes to the modern expectations of equality. Kinda like I want equal pay in the workforce but I don't want equal pay on dates.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 4:14:18 PM

TheLilSquaw

Posts: 2340
Joined: 10/24/2012
From: Middle River, MD
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: spideycool69

I've been contacted by Mistresses on some occassions and I started to ask myself that do Mistresses really do that? Or that task is just reserved for slaves? I mean I've always pictured Them attracting slaves not contacting them.

If I contact someone it's usually because they have a photo, something in their profile, or a journal entry that has caught my eye.

It's a personal thing.
I don't contact people to for personal relationships, granted I am not looking for a new primary partner or actively seeking.

My advice, if someone catches your attention.
Read their profile.
If they still have your attention, reach out.
No harm no foul.
Just don't get butt hurt if they don't respond or don't respond the way you hope.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 6:44:11 PM

cloudboy

Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
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In my eight years here, it's never happened. Whenever I am contacted, its a scam. My one caveat is that I've never been "looking" or available.

Taken a step further, I sometimes write to other Femdoms b/c of something in their profile. So I might send a message with a question, comment, or observation -- and I would say the response rate for me is about 30%. Within the response rate, thoughtful responses happen about 1 in 3 times.

If I write to a professional, the response rate is 100%.

(in reply to spideycool69)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 6:46:24 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
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It's sounds harsh, but with the male to female ratio in the D/s BDSM communities, I don't think women have had to make first contact.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 8:50:14 PM

RemoteUser

Posts: 2854
Joined: 5/10/2011
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A Domme once contacted me and after a few hullos and such, she asked for a pic, so why not - I obliged.

She then tried to order me to cut my hair.

If I laughed any harder I would have wished I had a diaper fetish.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 9:07:55 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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That's ok, dude. Other Dommes have told you that they liked your hair.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 9:15:23 PM

EsotericLady

Posts: 713
Joined: 1/2/2013
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I'm so glad a 30 year old guy FINALLY told me who I am! LMAO
Dearie, I am not in it for the money. I am financially secure myself, thanks.
I am also not some older, very unattractive woman who couldn't get a male to look at her...no matter what age...so I figured out a strategy to come here. (OMGGGGG! Where do these guys get this stuff? LOL)

And after reading your comments, I agree with you. YOU have a higher chance of getting struck by lightening than to get contacted by an intelligent, independent, successful, creative, spontaneous Domme with a sense of humor....exactly like me!

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4asiansub

From the sheer numbers i would say not very likely. The ration of female dominant to male masochist on this site, is anywhere around 1/100, to 1/300. Most of female dominants are in it for the money, or alternatively just some older (or very unattractive women) in hope to get younger/much better looking guys (which without it being female dominant they never would, quite a smart strategy). I'm not saying all of them are like this. But you have more chance to get struck by a lightning, than to get contacted by a genuine dom that doesn't fall into the above categories.

Just my 2c.

Peace.

(in reply to looking4asiansub)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 9:24:35 PM

EsotericLady

Posts: 713
Joined: 1/2/2013
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I may occasionally reach out to someone because I read a comment of there's... or something in their profile struck me as interesting.
It in NO WAY is an indication that I am hard up for messages, or that I am a fake, or a scammer.
I haven't had a difficult time approaching someone I thought was interesting (even offline) for years now.
The more freaked out and quick to put labels on women who do, the quicker you'll be letting a nice, compatible person slip through your fingers.

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingOwnertoo

From time to time ... a Real Domme ... will reach out to you. Could be something written in your profile ... or if you use them, the message boards.

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 9:35:06 PM

EsotericLady

Posts: 713
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I know.. I know. It should have been spelled "their's." I'm tired! lol

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/16/2013 9:59:12 PM

Ronnie1986

Posts: 102
Joined: 1/15/2013
Status: offline

i have been contacted by many fakes in the matter of a day or two however i have had allot more reals than i would have expected.. the problem is im not a slave.. im looking for somone dominant to submit to.. so these real ones i guess either ignoring my info or reading it and not caring still message me.. maybe they are using a phone and cant read my profile the way i require it be curse over to read.. regardless they message me with somthing like.. Show me your body... like seriously you expect me to drop everything and strip for somone online when i clearly say im not a slave in my profile? what happened to getting to know each other and seeing if we even connect.. id have to say i have been messaged by 5 real ones well... for all i know they were catfish bu they wernt fishing for information they were lookin for a slave.. and i have turned them all down so far.. except one but thats a iffy thing.. bottom line is they come at me like im 100% submissive when it clearly says in my profile im somone who has to build trust and respect.. above all i think im a sapiosexual so coming at me like a drone calling me slave just really turns me off...

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 4:16:27 AM

MistressJinxBBW

Posts: 47
Joined: 1/8/2013
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To all the older female Dommes....
As A younger Dom I admire you and your beauty, Please do not put yourself down. You are beautiful and an inspiration to the younger dom's on this site. I don't think appearance matters but the soul.

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(in reply to Ronnie1986)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 7:06:17 AM

Rochsub2009

Posts: 2536
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: TNDommeK

What do you mean by " real"?
I do not contact males, I get enough email from them already.

Yeah but, presumably, you don't get enough contact from *the* male, singular. So why don't *you* contact *him*, hmmm?

Actually, she has.

TNDommeK, are we still on for this weekend? I'll bring the lube, you bring the strap-on.

The above was said jokingly, but in reality TNDommeK has written to me. So have several of the other Dommes in this thread. They all know that if they write to me, I'm going to respond, and vice versa. Moreover, there are many Dommes on this board who I would gladly invite to dinner if they happened to be visiting my town. And I've actually met a few under just those circumstances.

I never understand why so many guys say that Dommes never respond to their messages. The Dommes who participate in the forum almost always respond. The Dommes on the other side who don't participate in the forum may be an entirely different matter.

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 10:34:36 AM

TNDommeK

Posts: 7153
Joined: 3/13/2010
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You know you turn me on when you talk like that Roch, lol.

There are very few messages I will not respond to. They are usually the "nice tits" or " will you chop off my cock" messages. Even then sometimes I will write back with "really?!?!"

Edited to make "ice tits" into "nice tit". Although I should have left it, ice tits sounded funnier.

< Message edited by TNDommeK -- 1/17/2013 10:35:57 AM >

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 11:23:58 AM

cocomistress

Posts: 13
Joined: 12/31/2012
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4asiansub

From the sheer numbers i would say not very likely. The ration of female dominant to male masochist on this site, is anywhere around 1/100, to 1/300. Most of female dominants are in it for the money, or alternatively just some older (or very unattractive women) in hope to get younger/much better looking guys (which without it being female dominant they never would, quite a smart strategy). I'm not saying all of them are like this. But you have more chance to get struck by a lightning, than to get contacted by a genuine dom that doesn't fall into the above categories.

Just my 2c.

Peace.

1.) Don't make sweeping generalizations accusing people of being gold diggers
2.) Financial domination is a legitimate fetish. If a consenting adult wants to pay tribute to a mistress or domme, they made an informed decision of their own free will.
3.) Some people are not concerned with age and appearance.
4.) Don't use double standards. There are plenty of old, unattractive men who go after young attractive dommes. But it's not about looks, it's about character.
5.) There is no protocol. I can just as easily message as I would expect a sub to message me.

(in reply to looking4asiansub)

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 11:35:57 AM

Ronnie1986

Posts: 102
Joined: 1/15/2013
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cocomistress

quote:

ORIGINAL: looking4asiansub

From the sheer numbers i would say not very likely. The ration of female dominant to male masochist on this site, is anywhere around 1/100, to 1/300. Most of female dominants are in it for the money, or alternatively just some older (or very unattractive women) in hope to get younger/much better looking guys (which without it being female dominant they never would, quite a smart strategy). I'm not saying all of them are like this. But you have more chance to get struck by a lightning, than to get contacted by a genuine dom that doesn't fall into the above categories.

Just my 2c.

Peace.

1.) Don't make sweeping generalizations accusing people of being gold diggers
2.) Financial domination is a legitimate fetish. If a consenting adult wants to pay tribute to a mistress or domme, they made an informed decision of their own free will.
3.) Some people are not concerned with age and appearance.
4.) Don't use double standards. There are plenty of old, unattractive men who go after young attractive dommes. But it's not about looks, it's about character.
5.) There is no protocol. I can just as easily message as I would expect a sub to message me.

actually he is right.. if you search female dominants in michigan all you will see is a bunch of 18-26 year old girls seeking online only financial domination and/or the professional domme... it doesnt take a rocket scientist to see these younger girls have found a way to not at all be a kinkster and still manipulate idiot kinksters into giving them money.. honestly i cant blame them because id probably do the same if i were them and i think they are pretty smart for figuring this out lol.. but it does seriously kill this site when every profile in your state is a young findom.. to top that off findoms being here business oriented constantly sign in and out putting there profile at the top.. this gets really annoying.. to somone like me who is here to find a ltr with somone of like mind its a huge turn off to this site seeing only woman that want sugar daddies and no real commitment..

i would like to add if youre a professional domme you are technicly plugging your business with your profile and should have to pay the site advertising fees as any other business..

< Message edited by Ronnie1986 -- 1/17/2013 11:40:07 AM >

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 11:54:22 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Ronnie1986
to top that off findoms being here business oriented constantly sign in and out putting there profile at the top.. this gets really annoying..

Can't you just hide their profiles? I have over 200 female profiles on hide. I haven't hidden too many findomme profiles though, because I enjoy perving their photos.

But yeah, if you aren't living in a major metropolitan area, odds are, if you want to date off CM, you're going to have to travel. Women understand this too, though. If you connect with someone who wants to meet you, don't be afraid to split the cost. Or, one of you drives and the other pays for gas. Anyone looking seriously on this site knows that distance can be an obstacle to overcome.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

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RE: Does a Real Mistress ever contact a slave or is it ... - 1/17/2013 11:56:33 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
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I have probably thousands of profiles on hide.

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