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Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when it comes to peacocking genitalia R/T vs O/L?


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Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when it co... - 2/1/2013 8:55:49 AM   
Pyramus


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QUESTION:
Why do some men appear to utterly lose their sense of decorum in this fetish forum when those very same men clearly dress almost always without offending women in the real world. (And why are women more balanced in this regard.)

In two recent threads, it becomes painfully obvious that women:
(a) Do not often want to see naked pictures of we men in our profiles, and,
(b) Do not, in general, find the male genitalia visually attractive

On the one hand, men are clearly restrained in the outside world from showing their primary and secondary sexual genitalia, in that typical male business, casual, sport, and even bedroom attire can not be considered to be overtly sexually revealing.

Specifically, one almost never hears women vehemently complaining about how men dress in the 'normal world'.

Yet, apparently, it's a common no-more-genitalia complaint of women here which is revealed in this vignette which was offered as advice to men today:
VIDEO: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7CxgpevKuU

The conundrum is why (a large proportion of?) men appear to throw all that unassuming decorum they exhibit in their normal lives to the wind, by peacocking their genitalia here, much to the (cringing) distaste of women.

Why the striking unbalance?

BEGIN STRIKING CONTRAST:

Contrast men with women in the outside world, where it is this man's opinion that women are much more balanced in their action. Specifically, women show far less genitalial restraint in the common world than men do, where many ladies show (and enhance, perhaps even falsely) as much of their primary and secondary genitalia as they feel they can get away with (perhaps inversely proportional to maturity) in those same business, casual, sport, and bedroom attire situations we noted above (where the men showed none).

Witness these commonly heard expressions:
- "Is this skirt too short?"
- "Does it make my butt look fat?"
- "Can you see through my blouse?"
etc.

Having had both girls and boys, I've never had the boy sent home for inappropriate dress (e.g., too short of a skirt), while it's a constant struggle with the girl (who argues vehemently to wear skimpy clothing for reasons unknown to me).

The contrast is striking:
- It appears men show supreme restraint in the common world - yet the unbalance is that some of those men show supreme unrestraint on this fetish web site. In total contrast, women appear to be greatly more balanced in that they show far less restraint than men in the BOTH worlds ... but, concurrently, they seem to at least have a better sense of balanced decorum here, in the fetish world.

So, the question arises:
QUESTION: Why is it that a decent number men are clearly more unbalanced than the women - while the women as a whole, are clearly more balanced, yet less restrained, than the men?

< Message edited by Pyramus -- 2/1/2013 9:04:05 AM >
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Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in &quo... - 2/1/2013 8:56:53 AM   
Pyramus


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I fixed the title to better reflect the somewhat complex enigma:
Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when it comes to peacocking genitalia real time vs online?

< Message edited by Pyramus -- 2/1/2013 9:00:05 AM >

(in reply to Pyramus)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 9:03:50 AM   
Level


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This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Pyramus)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 9:08:12 AM   
subinsilicon


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I can be my true self here. I can't strut around naked on all fours at work. Not unless some Domme wants to give me a job. :)

(in reply to Pyramus)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 9:14:04 AM   
usemetopleaseyou


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It's simple.
Women are whores all the time.
Men are only whores here.

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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 9:18:23 AM   
pompeii


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I think it is related to how each perceives their body in relation to their actions.

Men don't perceive their body to be all that important in the business or casual world.

Here, on the forum, men perceive their body to be more important, relatively, than in their normal lives.

I'd guess that women on the forum don't see their body as being any more or less important than their body is in real life.

(in reply to usemetopleaseyou)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 10:09:22 AM   
OsideGirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: usemetopleaseyou

It's simple.
Women are whores all the time.
Men are only whores here.


That's amazingly offensive.


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The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 10:25:16 AM   
Cilicia


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

That's amazingly offensive.



I'm guessing the point was women are selling their bodies all the time and men only do it here.

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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 10:48:17 AM   
freedomdwarf1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: usemetopleaseyou

It's simple.
Women are whores all the time.
Men are only whores here.


That's amazingly offensive.



Even I find that sort of remark amzingly obtuse and offensive - as a guy!!

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 11:02:57 AM   
Lucylastic


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Luckily some dickheads are fairly easy to spot after a few posts.

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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 11:19:40 AM   
OsideGirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cilicia


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl

That's amazingly offensive.



I'm guessing the point was women are selling their bodies all the time and men only do it here.


Which is STILL offensive and incorrect.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

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RE: Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when i... - 2/1/2013 11:57:33 AM   
fucktoyprincess


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I think the crux of the issue is still why heterosexual men use their genitalia to attempt to attract women when most women find genital pics distasteful at best, downright offputting at worst. In other words, I'm not surprised that women try to appear attractive to men (however one might define that - including appearing "sexy") because men are highly visual creatures who generally respond to a female's body (whether fully clothed, scantily clothed or naked). So women do the sensible thing and try to put some photo up (clothed or not) that they feel will be visually appealing to the men, and guess what, most heterosexual men are attracted to a woman's body, period, whether clothed or not. That's just a fact of life. It's what sells a lot of men's magazines and what drives part of the porn industry - scantily clad and/or naked women. So women here, and in the world, are only trying to do what they know seems to work - which is to try and be attractive to men - knowing full well, that a sexy appearance is attractive to men, and a "sexy" appearance often has to do with highlighting her body. I'm not saying women put up naked pics or show up to dates naked, but simply that women do think about how to accentuate their positive physical attributes, knowing full well that men are visually excited.

Now why heterosexual men would continue to use the infamous "cock shot" to try to attract women when most women express a dislike for that kind of picture - well, the only thing that can be said is that they must be having inordinate success with the small minority of women who like that kind of picture. So if it works for them, so be it. Why should I care.

I have to assume that these pics are working for these men. Or that have exhibitionist tendencies that are satisfied purely by having a profile up with a cock shot. Or are fake profiles. Or profiles of men who don't actually want to meet anyone. Or are profiles of men who only want to meet women who like these kinds of pics (even if those women are rare). There is no question that such a pic likely reduces their probability of finding a match - but it doesn't reduce it to zero.

I've never ended up meeting someone online that resulted in a relationship when they had a cock shot in their profile (whether as their primary pic, or even a secondary one). In other words, I've corresponded and even had coffee with men who had - but ultimately those have never worked out. Fundamentally, I think the kind of man who would use a cock shot is just not that compatible with me as a human being. But I don't claim to represent all women on this issue. These men must be having some measure of success (or deriving some other benefit) to be putting these pics up. Otherwise I have to draw the conclusion that they are just plain stupid.

So, unless a man with a cock shot is complaining that he isn't meeting enough women on a site like this, I could care less what he is using as his pic. But if he is complaining, then he ought to take heed to the feedback that most women are giving, And if he's happy, let him use whatever pic he wants.

ETA to add: This discussion does not apply to gay men - my gay male friends have a very different take on nudity and nudity in profiles. I don't know if they are representative, but my comments are only referring to heterosexual men who are trying to attract women.






< Message edited by fucktoyprincess -- 2/1/2013 11:59:22 AM >


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RE: Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when i... - 2/1/2013 12:06:27 PM   
PeonForHer


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quote:

There is no question that such a pic likely reduces their probability of finding a match - but it doesn't reduce it to zero.


Their chances could have been zero to start with. I think an element of certain men's thinking, that people sometimes ignore on this subject, is that of 'What have I got to lose? To hell with it, I might just as well do what turns *me* on.'

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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 12:16:35 PM   
kdsub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.



Level I'm a glutton for punishment but... this is so true and it's amazing that many, otherwise intelligent, women here on CM can't at least understand this and be tolerant. Just as we as men are expected to decipher the minds of women on this site so should women make the same effort. Instead they spend an inordinate amount of time complaining as if this will change the nature of men.

All and all I believe men try far harder to please women on this site then women men. We are different creatures with different needs and we feel the world with different emotions.

Lets just check back on these kinds of threads…who is bitching over and over…bitch bitch bitch. The only choice for women is learn to understand us and help us understand you or spend useless lives waiting for the perfect man that dresses as they like….watches the correct television programming…enjoys chick flicks…and never looks at porn.

Butch

< Message edited by kdsub -- 2/1/2013 12:25:50 PM >


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RE: Why are MEN far less BALANCED than women ... when i... - 2/1/2013 12:17:35 PM   
fucktoyprincess


Posts: 2337
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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

There is no question that such a pic likely reduces their probability of finding a match - but it doesn't reduce it to zero.


Their chances could have been zero to start with. I think an element of certain men's thinking, that people sometimes ignore on this subject, is that of 'What have I got to lose? To hell with it, I might just as well do what turns *me* on.'


I often do think there is a huge exhibitionist quality to those pics that has much more to do with making themselves happy through self-expression than it does with trying to attract anyone. (maybe this is why - men feel too restricted in real life to let it all hang out so they overindulge in online cock shots??)

Oh, and p.s. while I really don't find cock shots attractive, it simply must be said that chest shots of men are an entirely different thing. Yes, indeed.





< Message edited by fucktoyprincess -- 2/1/2013 12:22:59 PM >


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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 1:09:00 PM   
RedMagic1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level
This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.

My interpretation is slightly different. I think a lot of people on the site, both male and female, feel desexualized in real life, and hope that CM will provide them an avenue where they are seen as a sexual being. I see men's dick pics as cut from the same cloth as the stereotypical photo of the "400 pound woman in a thong." They want to be recognized as someone who has fetishizable body parts.

Ironically, this means that the men who have the least game in day-to-day life, are often the ones who are the most penis-in-your-face on CM. They have the most unrequited desire to be seen as a sexual being, so they feel the most urgency about ensuring women see them that way.

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Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
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(in reply to Level)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 1:10:56 PM   
Level


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kdsub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.



Level I'm a glutton for punishment but... this is so true and it's amazing that many, otherwise intelligent, women here on CM can't at least understand this and be tolerant. Just as we as men are expected to decipher the minds of women on this site so should women make the same effort. Instead they spend an inordinate amount of time complaining as if this will change the nature of men.

All and all I believe men try far harder to please women on this site then women men. We are different creatures with different needs and we feel the world with different emotions.

Lets just check back on these kinds of threads…who is bitching over and over…bitch bitch bitch. The only choice for women is learn to understand us and help us understand you or spend useless lives waiting for the perfect man that dresses as they like….watches the correct television programming…enjoys chick flicks…and never looks at porn.

Butch


Hey there Butch. It just seems to me that for someone to be offended, or disguted, by sexuality on this sort of site....lol. Has the concept of "I'm female, so I control the zipper", over-extended its bounds here, in terms of pics/language?

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to kdsub)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 1:13:28 PM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level
This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.

My interpretation is slightly different. I think a lot of people on the site, both male and female, feel desexualized in real life, and hope that CM will provide them an avenue where they are seen as a sexual being. I see men's dick pics as cut from the same cloth as the stereotypical photo of the "400 pound woman in a thong." They want to be recognized as someone who has fetishizable body parts.

Ironically, this means that the men who have the least game in day-to-day life, are often the ones who are the most penis-in-your-face on CM. They have the most unrequited desire to be seen as a sexual being, so they feel the most urgency about ensuring women see them that way.


I think there's a great deal of truth in your post.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to RedMagic1)
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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 1:17:07 PM   
Servant4Queen


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quote:

ORIGINAL: kdsub

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

This site is seen by many, if not most, as sexual in nature. Many males thus think the women here won't mind, or want to "share" the male's sexuality.



Level I'm a glutton for punishment but... this is so true and it's amazing that many, otherwise intelligent, women here on CM can't at least understand this and be tolerant. Just as we as men are expected to decipher the minds of women on this site so should women make the same effort. Instead they spend an inordinate amount of time complaining as if this will change the nature of men.

All and all I believe men try far harder to please women on this site then women men. We are different creatures with different needs and we feel the world with different emotions.

Lets just check back on these kinds of threads…who is bitching over and over…bitch bitch bitch. The only choice for women is learn to understand us and help us understand you or spend useless lives waiting for the perfect man that dresses as they like….watches the correct television programming…enjoys chick flicks…and never looks at porn.

Butch


Butch and Level I couldn't agree more!! Amen!

I know cock shots are not popular , but many men show it because its the only opportunity to show our "private" parts EVER. Whereas a woman on the beach or even in the workplace has far too many opportunities to flaunt their stuff. example being men where bog ole trunks at the beach. Women where thongs, bikini's and other attire showing off a lot more. So on a site like this this is the time we feel we can safely show ours "stuff".

fucktoyprincess ..... I happen to find close ups of vaginas for more unattractive myself. While I'm at it the classic shot of holding your tits in your hands is also disturbing !


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RE: Why is it that MEN are less balanced than women in ... - 2/1/2013 1:24:52 PM   
Level


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Joined: 3/3/2006
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Servant4... I do understand. Just go into it with the knowledge that many women won't share that philosophy .

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to Servant4Queen)
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