love and respect (Full Version)

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LordKonstantine -> love and respect (2/15/2013 8:57:15 AM)

I see it all the time, females want to be cherished, loved and appreciated by that one dom/master who they can submit to. If that is what you truly want, women, stop being bitches! Men shut down when they are not respected, they take their love and bury it. If you truly want a man to love you and give you the attention you crave, respect him. Not in the way you recognize respect, but in the way he recognizes respect. Thank him for providing for you, protecting you, leading you. When men are disrespected, they shut down, turn off etc. When women dont feel the love, they disrespect a man. It keeps going around and around in a crazy circle. We are both hard wired like that. Ladies, if you want your man to "get it", you need to "get it" too.


A womans place is in the home, submitting to her man, and being respectful. The bible orders men to love their wives, it does not order them to respect their wives. Because men show respect when given respect. The bible also orders women to submit and respect their their husbands, not to love their husbands. Because women are hard wired to love naturally. They are the nurturers and caregivers. Its their job to love and care.





If a soldier is willing to die for his battle buddy on a field of combat, yet will walk away from a contentious woman, what does that tell you?





No greater love hath a man than to lay his life down for another.





Men reciprocate love thru their respect, a woman who is mean, mouthy, disrespectful, demeaning, complaining, etc.... will get no love from her husband. He will just walk away and say, "I dont need this shit".





Women if you want men to treat you the way you want to be treated, treat them that way first.



OsideGirl -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 8:59:54 AM)

Well, aren't you just a big ball of sweeping generalizations and wrong assumptions.



ChatteParfaitt -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:05:10 AM)

Alrighty then.

This is your personal philosophy, and you are entitled to it.

Some may agree with you, many will disagree. But if you are really interested in discussing this subject, you will get better results if you don't appear so very close minded. Posting a personal opinion and claiming it as the only right way to think does not generally get good results here.





LordKonstantine -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:05:43 AM)

Another so-called self proclaimed submissive who just doesnt get it. And at 46, I doubt she ever will.....
Instead of getting defensive about it, why dont you look at for what it really is? Look at how each persons behaviour affects the others. Or does your pride keep you from doing that?



ChatteParfaitt -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:08:56 AM)

[sm=jerry.gif]

It's Friday isn't it?

Is it a full moon too?




MissBlueangel -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:12:41 AM)

Going to be good

[sm=alien.gif]



OsideGirl -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:15:38 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordKonstantine

Another so-called self proclaimed submissive who just doesnt get it. And at 46, I doubt she ever will.....


I've been very happily married to Master for 13 years....you're single and preaching one twue way-ism from a soap box on an internet forum.

So, once again, we have the single person telling everyone else how to run a relationship.

And FYI: Another assumption.




TheLilSquaw -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:15:41 AM)

OP,
Your post is nothing but YOUR POV.
That doesn't mean it's mine or anyone else's.

Your post is full of wild generalizations of both men and women.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordKonstantine

When men are disrespected, they shut down, turn off etc. When women dont feel the love, they disrespect a man.


The men in MY life don't shut down when disrespected by me or anyone else.
They check who ever is being disrespectful.
They don't even "turn off" they may choose not to deal with the one disrespecting them but that isn't turning off.



quote:


A womans place is in the home, submitting to her man, and being respectful. The bible orders men to love their wives, it does not order them to respect their wives. Because men show respect when given respect. The bible also orders women to submit and respect their their husbands, not to love their husbands. Because women are hard wired to love naturally. They are the nurturers and caregivers. Its their job to love and care.


You may believe that the bible is the word of god.
Not everyone does.
You may believe this is what the bible says in regards to the relationship between men and women.
Not everyone does.
You may think that all women are naturally nurturing and caregivers.
It's been proven that that is not the true.


quote:


Men reciprocate love thru their respect, a woman who is mean, mouthy, disrespectful, demeaning, complaining, etc.... will get no love from her husband. He will just walk away and say, "I dont need this shit".


This isn't always true.
Some people simply do not know how to show love.
PERIOD.

I also know many men who actually LIKE their wives/ partners to be mouthy, mean, and demeaning.











TheLilSquaw -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:18:50 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordKonstantine

Another so-called self proclaimed submissive who just doesnt get it. And at 46, I doubt she ever will.....
Instead of getting defensive about it, why dont you look at for what it really is? Look at how each persons behaviour affects the others. Or does your pride keep you from doing that?



Another self proclaimed dom trying to tell everyone else how to live their lives and run their relationships.

If you are such a good catch why are you single?

I'd think by 40 you would have figure out people are individuals.



RedMagic1 -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:26:41 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LordKonstantine
The bible orders men to love their wives, it does not order them to respect their wives.

There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.
--Galatians 3:28

Do you respect Christ Jesus? Because at least according to Galatians, how you treat women is how you treat Him.



poise -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 9:33:10 AM)

What comes first, the chicken or the egg?
As a submissive woman, I find it incredibly hard to submit to a man I can't respect,
regardless of whether or not he loves and cherishes me. He does not magically
get respected simply because of his gender, but by his actions.
Just as I may need to earn his love, he also needs to earn my respect.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LordKonstantine
I see it all the time, females want to be cherished, loved and appreciated by
that one dom/master who they can submit to. If that is what you truly want, women,
stop being bitches!

Perhaps if this is all you are seeing in your relationships, the common denominator is you?



SeekingTrinity -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:08:20 AM)

~Fring it~

Thanks, OP...I needed a good laugh this morning. You should have put a disclaimer in the beginning of this so that I wouldnt have had a mouthful of coffee at the moment I started reading this little manifesto of yours. Let me drop a little wisdom on you. Im a woman. And my place in the world is wherever the hell I feel like it is. Respect is earned, it cant be demanded or taken by force.

Just a word of friendly advice...drop the Neanderthal "me man, woman kneel before me" bullshit because its really ridiculous and foolish. And you come off sounding like a real douche canoe. You dont want that, do you?



theshytype -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:13:58 AM)

Not every woman is submissive. Not every man dominant.
Not everyone is heterosexual.
Not everyone believes in the bible or religion in general.
Not everyone is single and needing relationship counseling from a single man.

I do not freely give my respect to just anyone, as there are many individuals who do not deserve. Be it sex, age, race, religion - nothing will automatically ensure I give my respect.
A man who is man enough to cherish and respect me, he will be deserving of my respect and I will cherish him.
He will love me in the way I want to be loved, and I will love him in the way he wants to be loved.
It's a two-way street.

We've been married for 12 years and the happiest we have ever been, so I think we're doing it right (for us).
You can have your POV, but if it's not working for you then maybe you should question your thinking instead of blaming everyone else's.




OsideGirl -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:15:11 AM)

I just brought Master his breakfast. He swatted me on the ass, kissed me and said, "You're a damned good woman, you know that?" I said, "Not according to some schmuck on the internet". Master is laughing his ass off.



Notsweet -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:20:57 AM)

It's unfortunate that the OP presented it quite that way, because what he says actually does make sense.

We all know that men process stuff differently than women. I'd say that of the men I have known, they valued respect a great deal more than they valued what I saw as acts of love. Case in point: You ask him to do something. He says ok and ignores you (you think). You ask again. He says "I said OK," and then ignores you (you think). Finally, you ask again, so now it's nagging and disrespecting what he said (he thinks).

The issue--you didn't say when you needed it, so he's going to do it when the game's over, or after his nap, or after whatever.

I know this is a real simplification and over generalization of how the problem of love/respect comes up, but if anything, I occasionally learn from experience.

What he's talking about is communication, and how when it breaks down, men feel disrespected and women feel unloved.
There's a theory here. YMMV, and I'm certain I'll hear about it now, LOL....



OsideGirl -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:36:12 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Notsweet

What he's talking about is communication, and how when it breaks down, men feel disrespected and women feel unloved.
There's a theory here. YMMV, and I'm certain I'll hear about it now, LOL....



I disagree, he's not just talking about communication. He states that a woman should be loved, but doesn't have to be respected. He states that women belong in the home, submitting to her man and he states that all women should be submissive simply because they're female. He states that women are naturally caregivers and nurturers, which has been proven false over and over again by society.

He's not preaching communication. He's made sweeping generalizations about women and assumptions about how EVERYONE'S relationship should work.

If his chauvinistic view works for him....yippee. But, preaching it as the one true way to everyone, including those that have happy successful relationships and relationships where the female is dominant, was pompous and a misstep that people here will call him on.




theshytype -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 10:51:51 AM)

I didn't get that at all. When someone starts throwing in their interpretations of the bible out, it leads me to believe more closely to the "kneel bitch" philosophy. 

When someone talks about a woman bitching or nagging, I'm not thinking communication issues I'm just thinking they're incompatible. 
Yes, I thinks it's common knowledge people can communicate differently (I'm not going to limit it to men vs. women) and is up to those people in that specific relationship to figure it out.   However, at least with the people I know, when they start bitching or nagging it's because they already feel their lacking something from their significant other. They're past the communication issues usually. 



Notsweet -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 11:03:32 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


I disagree, he's not just talking about communication. He states that a woman should be loved, but doesn't have to be respected. He states that women belong in the home, submitting to her man and he states that all women should be submissive simply because they're female. He states that women are naturally caregivers and nurturers, which has been proven false over and over again by society.

He's not preaching communication. He's made sweeping generalizations about women and assumptions about how EVERYONE'S relationship should work.

If his chauvinistic view works for him....yippee. But, preaching it as the one true way to everyone, including those that have happy successful relationships and relationships where the female is dominant, was pompous and a misstep that people here will call him on.




Well, there you go, he's not communicating well.

What he's trying to say, if I'm correct, is NOT that women DON'T NEED respect, it's that they value love as a higher goal, and tend to seek that first. For women, respect without love doesn't make a relationship. For men, love without respect isn't a relationship. It's not that men don't NEED love, it's just that respect is the primary goal.

Does that make sense?



Notsweet -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 11:09:44 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: theshytype

I didn't get that at all. When someone starts throwing in their interpretations of the bible out, it leads me to believe more closely to the "kneel bitch" philosophy. 

When someone talks about a woman bitching or nagging, I'm not thinking communication issues I'm just thinking they're incompatible. 
Yes, I thinks it's common knowledge people can communicate differently (I'm not going to limit it to men vs. women) and is up to those people in that specific relationship to figure it out.   However, at least with the people I know, when they start bitching or nagging it's because they already feel their lacking something from their significant other. They're past the communication issues usually. 


Well, some of us have a reaction to anyone mentioning the bible as a reference point because either we're agnostic, atheist, or have been smacked around by bible interpretations, so I certainly understand that.

Bitching and nagging are, in fact, communication issues. It's not because they don't fit, it's because men and women (yes, all kinds of people, but in this case, we're discussing male/female dynamics) do speak from different places. What a woman sees as making herself heard, men interpret as nagging. This is the kind of thing that begins to destroy relationships--before you get to the "lacking stage" there's been a communications breakdown. The "something lacking" is most often feeling respected, feeling loved, being heard. That's why a good marriage counselor can nip that stuff in the bud, and get couples bck on the right track.

At least, that's what they taught me for the x number of years that I paid to study it <grin>.



LordKonstantine -> RE: love and respect (2/15/2013 11:17:53 AM)

Not, you hit the nail on the head!



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