RE: Why A Slave? (Full Version)

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Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:20:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Good thing most dont know how to do it. [;)]


Let's face it: most men hardly know which end of their stick goes where. [:D]

Those of us that do know how to do it... well... you know better than most what that's like, good and bad.

IWYW,
— Aswad.



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:22:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl
The fact that she can contact her family tells me she doesnt really want to leave. She wants him to change. And until she realizes he wont change, she wont leave.

She does not work, not allowed to work, to hold money, has no money of her own, she surrendered her entire bank account to him, does not own anything, and possibility of parents not being helpful is very high. I think she's quite stuck.
But I hope it is as you said that she will find a solution to leave when she is ready to leave.
One of the things that freak me out most is not having my own money, that is a very fearful, insecure position. With money, you can leave anytime, just hail a cab, whatever, but without..., you are reliant on kind souls to help you when you run away. Which means, vulnerable target for more bad folks.



Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:26:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

One of the things that freak me out most is not having my own money, that is a very fearful, insecure position.


Ah, but a good girl might get pocket money as a reward, quite possibly more than she could afford living on her own.

Realistically, once she is gone, there's not much he can do to access her money.

The barrier to leaving is all in her mind.

As is always the case.

IWYW,
— Aswad.



littlewonder -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:27:55 PM)

or you go to the police and the nearest women's shelter.

Sorry but if she's able to contact people outside the house, there's a way out. I'm guessing you have never met this girl in real life. Again, another tap tap tap story.

For now on I'm just gonna refer to these as tap tap taps. [;)]



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:29:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aswad
Ah, but a good girl might get pocket money as a reward, quite possibly more than she could afford living on her own.

That could be your style, but not his style, his deprivation of giving her any money of her own to spend, as well as forbidding her to work to earn her own dough is all part of making her more dependent on him. She doesn't get to have any money, period.
quote:

Realistically, once she is gone, there's not much he can do to access her money.

She said that the conditions of her slavery is that, she close her bank account, empty out all the cash and give it to him. Which she actually silly girl, did...



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:33:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

or you go to the police and the nearest women's shelter.

Sorry but if she's able to contact people outside the house, there's a way out. I'm guessing you have never met this girl in real life. Again, another tap tap tap story.

For now on I'm just gonna refer to these as tap tap taps. [;)]

I don't believe it's any tap tap tap story, because, no money was solicited at all. And no conditions, requests, nothing. How can I possibly meet her if she's not allowed to socialise or have friends?



tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:35:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Aswad

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Good thing most dont know how to do it. [;)]


Let's face it: most men hardly know which end of their stick goes where. [:D]

Those of us that do know how to do it... well... you know better than most what that's like, good and bad.

IWYW,
— Aswad.



Oh yes... grins



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:37:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
or you go to the police and the nearest women's shelter.

I was thinking about this, but if she's been stockhelm syndromed, then, she would not be able to do anything that she feels could put her master in danger too.
I mean if she went to any of those places, they would hunt him down.



Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:41:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

That could be your style, but not his style, his deprivation of giving her any money of her own to spend, as well as forbidding her to work to earn her own dough is all part of making her more dependent on him. She doesn't get to have any money, period.


Then he is underutilizing the available control mechanisms. Which is not surprising: he sounds more like an abuser than a decent dominant. And, as tazzygirl said, until she realizes that isn't going to change, she's going to stay with him. The instant she realizes it, she will give serious thought to leaving, and quite possibly do so. If he had used both positive and negative control mechanisms, she would develop a much stronger bond, and be less inclined to leave on discovering the truth of her situation.

As a sidebar, in being so one-sided about it, he's setting himself up for charges and poor credibility in court.

quote:

She said that the conditions of her slavery is that, she close her bank account, empty out all the cash and give it to him. Which she actually silly girl, did...


So she heads down to wherever in her sluttiest clothes, waits for someone willing to part with some cash for something that's easier to do than what she's been living with for a long while, then has money. That money can be used to get to a shelter, open a bank account, and so forth.

As I said, it's in her head, which doesn't make it any less real to her.

IWYW,
— Aswad.



tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:44:20 PM)

I gotta tell ya, the more you discuss this, the harder it is for me to believe.



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:46:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

I gotta tell ya, the more you discuss this, the harder it is for me to believe.


We came from different countries, where I come from, women are brought up to be dependent on men, not independent and strong minded, we are always taught that we are less of a human being if we don't have a man, it's damn easy for things like that to happen.

People don't even encourage not settling, they totally encourage settling and telling women not to be too choosy, being with a man is better than being without one.

She's also from a Muslim country, and I frankly don't know if going to the authorities will help her, since they are all so bribable. I've brided police to waive my speeding ticket in her country.



Aswad -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:47:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75

I was thinking about this, but if she's been stockhelm syndromed, then, she would not be able to do anything that she feels could put her master in danger too. I mean if she went to any of those places, they would hunt him down.


Right about now, it should be dawning on you how cool Internal Enslavement is, when slavery is mutually desired.

For a regular submissive, on the other hand, it's probably a bad idea to go for Internal Enslavement.

Hence, common advice to [would-be] kajirae: Run. Now. And don't look back.

The most enjoyable ones tend not to listen. [:D]

IWYW,
— Aswad.




Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:50:53 PM)

quote:

Right about now, it should be dawning on you how cool Internal Enslavement is

I don't know about "cool", but does it work, yes I believe it works with the right victim.



thursdays -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:51:00 PM)

Argh



tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:52:19 PM)

The consent is in the beginning.



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:53:38 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

The consent is in the beginning.

Yup, that's the thing, once ya go in, tough turning back. Tough getting out. Depending on how much the Dom wanna hold on to you. If his determined you're staying forever, you're staying forever.



crazyml -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:56:11 PM)

Sure, but that's assuming that the consent was a) informed or b) asked for



JeffBC -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:59:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Greta75
I don't know about "cool", but does it work, yes I believe it works with the right victim.

Wait wait... Carol is a "victim" now? Do you have any idea how laughable that is? She is a woman wrapped in warmth and love and affection. She has a marriage that is better than any she knows with possibly two exceptions that are "on par". She is [reasonably] financially secure, has a roof over her head and food in her mouth. Yet she also cannot really think of disobeying me. Don't you think it kind of matters who you are enslaved to before we talk about whether it's abusive?

edited to add because Tazzygirl said "consent is the beginning"
Not for us it's not. For us the fact of our two personalities is the beginning and end. Consent in any sort of realistic fashion wasn't a part of the equation. Don't think I'm trying to support abusive behavior, I'm not. But the thing that happens between Carol and I does not start, end, or require an agreement. It is "that which happens" and it'd be damned hard to make anything else happen -- witness my comic attempts at releasing her.



tazzygirl -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 10:59:58 PM)

When I moved in, I moved in with my eyes wide open. I knew what I was getting into, and I agreed to it. I wasnt new to the lifestyle, nor to gor. I consented to everything and anything he wanted because we had a history, not to mention mutual friends, which told me he was honorable... and he was.

Does that always happen? Nope. But, to be honest, why would that girl simply empty a bank account? Why did she run from her family? Why can she not contact them now? Are they married? If I am guessing right, your culture frowns on living together, yes?



Greta75 -> RE: Why A Slave? (6/3/2013 11:05:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JeffBC
Wait wait... Carol is a "victim" now?

Jeff, I don't know why you are lumping yourself as one of these doms. To me, you care a whole loads about Carol feelings, and frankly, your relationship dynamic with her from your own description here seem to imply that you really respect her objections. You respect it but you are not giving up on trying to find another angle to make something you want more acceptable to her. So I don't even know why you lump yourself into this sort of slavery.





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