RE: Is moving too fast a red flag?

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/15/2013 2:59:05 PM

ClassAct2006

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For a relationship it would be too fast, but even with that I think it's good to speak and then meet because until you meet you don't know if it's likely to work so weeks of emailing can be a bit pointless.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/15/2013 6:35:44 PM

littlewonder

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depends on what you are looking for. Are you just looking for a session and/or casual sex? Then no it's not fast or a red flag. Hell I wouldn't even consider it a red flag if I found some guy that I liked.

If it's a red flag for you then so be it. But that would be for you, not everyone.

If it bothers you then don't do it. Simple.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/15/2013 6:38:58 PM

littlewonder

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

Okay so he is saying, in essence, "even though she is a Pro". Fair enough. Most of the rest of my comments still stand. It is rolling the dice to commit to a session the next day. Unless this Pro is very well known in the community. But even then, it doesn't necessarily follow that she is a good match for him.

Do you get to know a prostitute before you hire her to see if she's the right fit? Other than asking her "do you do threesomes and rough sex?"

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/15/2013 7:44:24 PM

ResidentSadist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

Okay so he is saying, in essence, "even though she is a Pro". Fair enough. Most of the rest of my comments still stand. It is rolling the dice to commit to a session the next day. Unless this Pro is very well known in the community. But even then, it doesn't necessarily follow that she is a good match for him.

Do you get to know a prostitute before you hire her to see if she's the right fit? Other than asking her "do you do threesomes and rough sex?"

I know that's always the first question I ask a hooker.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/16/2013 9:44:33 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

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If I was a pro Dom I would not want to wait a few weeks to set up a session. time is money.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 9:25:25 AM

SomethingCatchy

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quote:

would you meet someone the very next day if you started talking to them online?

Yes. I have before and I will continue to do it. What's the big deal? Waiting a week doesn't change the facts of what they really are. If you're scared of strangers, then lock yourself in your house and never go outside.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 9:31:32 AM

Reged

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I prefer to move towards meeting up with people quite quickly, corresponding online is fine though I think a 5 minute talk with someone face to face outweighs months of corresponding online when it comes to getting to know someone.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 9:37:18 AM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SomethingCatchy

quote:

would you meet someone the very next day if you started talking to them online?

Yes. I have before and I will continue to do it. What's the big deal? Waiting a week doesn't change the facts of what they really are. If you're scared of strangers, then lock yourself in your house and never go outside.

Well, sure, but here is the thing. I have had men write me one email and say, Hey!! Let's be impulsive and meet later tonight or tomorrow!! What do you say?

I say you did not ask my NAME, did not tell me your name, did not ask any questions and did not suggest a phone conversation, all of which, I require.

Meeting the next day or later that day, in the above cases, can be seen as desperation, which is not attractive to me.

Oh, and I am not scared of strangers, unless they want to cook and eat me.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 1:43:45 PM

littlewonder

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eehh....I've met people from online within 20 minutes of talking online. BUT the difference here is I was quite aware of what I was doing and with whom and all the risks involved. I was more than happy to accept all of that. I saw it no different than going to a bar and going home with someone.

I had no preconceived notions of what would happen and that the person would be who they said they were. I figured if I got there and I didn't like the person I'd just say thanks but no thanks and leave.

It was as simple as that. The problem is people get preconceived notions in their heads and build things up to be more than reality.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 2:04:51 PM

sexyred1

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This has nothing to do with risks and being unaware. That is cool for you and anyone else who wants to meet in 10 minutes of chatting online.

For me, not so much. I value myself and I would not be respecting myself to just jump into meeting anytime anyone who wanted to meet after sending one email.

I also did some things in my younger days that were more impulsive. That worked then and now, I am different. I am still very much aware of why I do what I do and my choices now are geared a different way. I am not interested in immediate gratification now. I can wait. And most importantly, I am seeking someone who feels the same.

Interestingly enough, I was just on a vanilla site chatting with someone who seemed very promising. We were IMing on the site and he started out ok, but then got increasingly excited to meet NOW.

I told him I would be interested in having a phone conversation and then making a plan to meet in a few days. He said NO, it has to be tonight, please let me come over and watch a DVD with you and snuggle.

I told him that if that approach worked for him, he could go try one of the many, many other fish in the sea as I don't dig desperation.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 3/17/2013 2:10:05 PM >

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 2:14:01 PM

Dyfrynt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

Okay so he is saying, in essence, "even though she is a Pro". Fair enough. Most of the rest of my comments still stand. It is rolling the dice to commit to a session the next day. Unless this Pro is very well known in the community. But even then, it doesn't necessarily follow that she is a good match for him.

Do you get to know a prostitute before you hire her to see if she's the right fit? Other than asking her "do you do threesomes and rough sex?"

So you are suggesting Pro Dommes are equivalent to prostitutes. WoW!

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 2:17:57 PM

Dyfrynt

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Of course her interest is the money. What do you think she is doing pro sessions for? To make friends?

Oh course she is doing it for the money! Why state the obvious.....

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 2:37:49 PM

littlewonder

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt

Okay so he is saying, in essence, "even though she is a Pro". Fair enough. Most of the rest of my comments still stand. It is rolling the dice to commit to a session the next day. Unless this Pro is very well known in the community. But even then, it doesn't necessarily follow that she is a good match for him.

Do you get to know a prostitute before you hire her to see if she's the right fit? Other than asking her "do you do threesomes and rough sex?"

So you are suggesting Pro Dommes are equivalent to prostitutes. WoW!

did I say that?

Prostitutes are in the business of physical sex.
ProDommes are in the business of sex as well, just not physical in the way we think of sex in the manner of prostitutes.

It's a business. Neither are going to wait around for you. They'll both just say "honey, when you decide what you want, come see me. Until then I gots others interested in what I'm offering".

Why would either one wait around for you to make up your mind? They are not here to have a relationship with you. They're here to make money, not be your friend.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/17/2013 2:52:12 PM

Dyfrynt

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Did you say that? Your first message I was unsure. Now I am understanding you were not saying that.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/18/2013 9:10:30 AM

LadyPact

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dyfrynt
Oh course she is doing it for the money! Why state the obvious.....

Because you didn't seem to get it the first time around that the guy is just booking a session.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/19/2013 7:42:27 AM

Dyfrynt

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Okay.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/22/2013 6:32:34 AM

Esinn

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I am semi-pro & pretty awesome. Personally I would never want to meet anyone tomorrow. At least if I ever did such circumstance has not presented itself. I am old fashion - actually that is 100% BS. Next day seems quick. But as mentioned... If she is pro.... Along the same lines escorts are pro. They will meet in 20 min. Thinking about this now though. I guess for me it makes sense I am not into the next day thing. As a pro/escort would not really meet / address my needs. Possibly I am odd.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/22/2013 4:33:08 PM

HarryVanWinkle

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TheWriter13

I just started to email this girl and she's telling me that if I'm serious about a session tomorrow I should text her in the am. I'm like wait isn't that a bit fast even if she's a pro I think we should wait at least week or two. I mean would you meet someone the very next day if you started talking to them online?

If she's close enough to meet right away and you both have the time available, what's the use of spending weeks talking online. That being said, I personally will not make any commitment to play before having a face to face meeting. That doesn't mean that there won't be any play right away, just that the existence of face to face chemistry must be established first and that can't be done without actually meeting.

Edited to add that I didn't see that she was a pro. Although, it really doesn't really make a difference, everything I said above would still apply if I were interested in, and were in the financial position to pay a pro.

< Message edited by HarryVanWinkle -- 3/22/2013 4:36:43 PM >

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/26/2013 8:25:21 PM

Aphrodite1974

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It is a big Red Flag to me.
In the heat of the moment when you are talking it seems great but give pause and think on it...at least overnight. I met a Dominant online and we talked for 2 days, met once and he was ready to collar me?? What the heck?
I know I am new to the lifestyle again after a lengthy absence but Woah.. so yes, it Can be a Red Flag.

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RE: Is moving too fast a red flag? - 3/27/2013 1:01:04 PM

kalikshama

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quote:

If the sexes were reversed everyone would be clamoring for the woman to hold back, be careful, don't rush into anything.

If this woman were booking a session with a pro, I'd want to do it the next day. I'm very cranky with the lead times for my masseur.

In fact, that's very similar - I get a Groupon offer for a local massage place. I check out the website. I might call and find out if when they say "deep tissue" they aren't going to wuss out on me. I'm in the mood for a massage and want it within 36 hours but will impatiently wait for a week or so if I must.

I don't need endless convos about where they trained and what the session will be like.

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