njlauren -> RE: What actions , if any, should I take? (5/5/2013 9:33:51 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar quote:
ORIGINAL: Wendel27 It's not bullshit to suggest that rape victims might not want to go through the ordeal of an examination, interview and possibly trial yet be able to tell other people about it Ishtar. Ah, that's absolutely plausible. However, that has got nothing to do with being too traumatized or intimidated to talk to the cops, which is what I called bullshit on. You may be leaving out something significant here. It is very, very hard for women to report rape as it commonly happens, whether at gunpoint or where someone won't take no for an answer, or has sex with someone who cannot consent (like the Steubenville, Ohio incident, where two dumbass, middle america jock types decided they had the right to do what they wanted to a girl who was passed out,and would have gotten away with it if it weren't for a blogger cutting through the coverup the cops and coach did). ..but there is something else, and that is that they may be afraid to report it for fear it will get out what they were doing. We might claim to be living in the 21st century, but people are still very afraid of their lifestyle getting out. Technically they would be covered by rape shield laws, but as wonderful rags like the NY Post demonstrate, or Fox News, somehow names 'slip out'...plus they also fear the cops will make them the guilty party, or look the other way because if they were sub, they must be asking for it or something. BD/SM in some ways is kind of like what happened with rapes years ago, when the victim and their lifestyle became fodder for defense attorneys. Bad tops know this, it is one of the reasons they feel empowered to do things, because they know the victims won't come forward. Not all that many years ago, men having sex with men who were abused or raped wouldn't report it, in large part because they didn't want it getting out, and also knowing that cops were (and in many cases still are) homophobic assholes. Posting on fetlife is pretty easy because it is anonymous, and they may have felt while they couldn't go to the cops, that they could warn others. One note about rape, the definition of rape is such that it doesn't matter what the person did, despite what the defenders of the assholes in Steubenville say. The girl was stupid to drink like that, or to go off with the players, but it is still rape, despite those who say it was her own fault (being stupid isn't a crime, taking advantage of someone's stupidity is). In this case, it can be really hard to determine what is really rape and what is part of consent. There was a case in NYC where a grad student was convicted of multiple counts of sexual assault after a weekend of scene play with her, when apparently the girl had second thoughts about what she did, freaked out and called the cops. The DA had e-mails squashed that showed she had agreed to their tete a tete, and the judge agreed it was irrelevant because you can't consent to assault.........(and this was NYC, not the court of Roy Moore in Alabama)....it was overturned on appeal, they appeals court ruled that suppressing the e-mails was a judicial mistake (too bad they didn't rule misconduct and get the judge removed from the bench, the ADA retired), and the District Attorney himself dropped all charges..so crying wold does happen (In case anyone wants to read up on it, it was called the Janovic case). Does the guy blow through safewords and do things the subs don't want, or did they just freak out? No way to know, but the fact that multiple women are complaining tells me there may be more there, but that isn't proof. One woman freaking out could be simply that, but more then a couple? If anything, this guy may be stupid enough to think being dom means doing anything he wants, because even if not rape, it sounds like he is taking inexperienced subs too far, which may not be a crime, but could be pure stupidity and arrogane.
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