RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master.

RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (Full Version)

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OsideGirl -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/12/2013 5:38:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 The OP's profile has 85 rules for a slave. It goes right back to one of my favorite quotes: Some people, you wonder why they're single. Others, not so much.

littlewonder -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/12/2013 6:05:57 PM)
Imo, one is not a Master till they have someone to Master. Otherwise you're a Dom. If you have a dominant personality but it doesn't matter to you if think in bdsm or vanilla terms, then imo, you're a dominant. And if you're just into playing and being the one on top then you're a top.

JeffBC -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/12/2013 6:15:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hrxxx What do you see yourself as Master / Mistress, Dominant / Domina. And are you a slave or submissive I'm a natural born leader married to a woman who "prefers to defer". I generally use the M/s label set to start out with because of the TPE, IE nature of our marriage.

ChatteParfaitt -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/12/2013 6:53:27 PM)
quote: Can a karate masters knowledge leave him? Can he ever be without his Mastery? No. But a guy can be lord over an empty home with no chick to play slave. That a person doesn't have someone to master does not make him or her less masterful. It makes him or her a master w/o a slave. He(she) retains the skills of good leadership, self control, and self mastery. These things don't evaporate when s-type goes off to work his or her real job. Which is why I believe a good dominant is a good dominant, with or without an s-type. I also prefer the term dominant instead of master, although I have used the term and sometimes do in my current relationship. The thing is, the term Master does not define who and what we are and how and why we do things. It is also a term that far too many imbue with all kinds of 'specialness.' It's become the new mantra, like 'submission is a gift.' Edited b/c the original seemed highly sexist once I reread it. Now it's close to slashy type. AH well.

amaidiamond -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 7:33:07 AM)
I just want to Applaud Stevens well thought out, informative response. OP - you would do well to listen and learn.

JeffBC -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 7:37:44 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt I'm going to steal this line. TY quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Punishment is the weakest of tools, inspiration and love the most powerful. I would agree with this if we inserted "usually". Disecting this a bit, punishment is actually a very, very strong tool. The problem with it is that it comes with a price tag that's sort of nasty. Usually negative incentives bring in resentment toward the leader. So if you punish someone you need to "pay up" or over time you lose them. If, for some reason, the follower doesn't build up the resentment or the leader provides sufficient good things to keep a positive balance then punishment is very, very effective.

crazyml -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 7:41:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hrxxx THATS THE THING, I DON´T CARE Hmm. Do you think that is the kind of thing a "Master" would say?

crazyml -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 7:43:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterCaneman I've kind of held off on responding to this largely because of my handle. I consider myself a Dom more than "Master", and I actually intended my handle to be "Mister Caneman", but I neglected to check my work before hitting the 'accept' button. But I do accept the term when it comes to being in charge, either in the bedroom or in the real world. I have held positions of authority, and I am a master of certain things, so I'm content to let things sit as they are (and at 1200+ posts, I'm not scrubbing it and starting over. Period.) Let me break down on my philosophy on this subject. I am not putting down others who live this lifestyle 24/7 in any respect, but I have always considered The Scene to be nothing more than a particularly rewarding hobby and recreational activity. For me and my partners, with the exception of two who wanted much more than I could give them, this was the dynamic. The ladies I interacted with liked playing, but there was a definite 'end time' for a scene. To live the life the way some folks do would become burdensome to me. I definitely put up a wall between my kink and the real world. This has served me well over the years. I consider myself a controlled, thoughtful, powerful, and sane man. I prefer being the top dog in any situation I'm in, but am smart enough to know when to bend. In the bedroom (or dungeon, if you prefer), I am in charge, but not to the point my partner starts to rethink her decision to consent. I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of someone out of control, and I constantly check myself to avoid that. Master? Dominant? To me, they're an interchangeable title. Others may disagree, and it's their right to do so. I am content with myself the way I am. I may not agree with this in its entirety, but it's still a quality post.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 8:30:14 AM)
I'm not going to go into the difference between a Dom and a Master, other to say that my definitions line up mostly with LP's and not at with Steven's (in fact, we're linearly opposed on this point, but he knows that, and it's mostly a background issue). What I think is interesting to get into, is how I define the difference between a free person, and a not free person, using the OPs profile as an example. To me, a free person is somebody who is capable of making their own choices, is responsible for their own decisions, and who doesn't expects others to give them what they should earn. A not free person expects to be given what they did not earn, doesn't take accountability for their own choices, and is so heavily influenced by their environment that they're incapable of detaching their decisions from it. From the OPs profile: quote: 2. I give my master the right to have power over me. - 13. I will respect my master. - 28. I will not think of others lustfully. - 38. I will blindly trust my master. - 84. I will respect my master and Master's rules. This is the profile of somebody who seeks to be given that which free people would seek to earn. This is the profile of somebody not accountable for their own choices, who would seek to put the responsibility for the choice with others, by getting them to agree to absurd and unfollowable rules so that when things fail, they can put the responsibility for that failure with the slave, instead of with their own failure to inspire. This is the profile of somebody so heavily influences by their environment, that they are incapable of making choices not dictated by it, as is evident by the attempt to seize that which they notice in those who are capable of attracting and keeping slaves by agreement, rather than merit. This, ladies and gentlemen, is the profile of a person who isn't free... i.e. in Gorean terminology, this is the profile of a slave. bows Hereby our exemplifying lecture is concluded and I wish you all a good day. [:D]

SimplyMichael -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 9:11:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JeffBC quote: ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt I'm going to steal this line. TY quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Punishment is the weakest of tools, inspiration and love the most powerful. I would agree with this if we inserted "usually". Disecting this a bit, punishment is actually a very, very strong tool. The problem with it is that it comes with a price tag that's sort of nasty. Usually negative incentives bring in resentment toward the leader. So if you punish someone you need to "pay up" or over time you lose them. If, for some reason, the follower doesn't build up the resentment or the leader provides sufficient good things to keep a positive balance then punishment is very, very effective. Well, I kinda figured this was in the context of a quality adult relationship. As for details, both 3lb sledgehammers and 3oz tackdrivers have their uses...

AlluraVogue -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 2:52:08 PM)
Mental image that came with reading this thread: All of us in a coffee shop, wearing various different colors and stripes on karate belts. Random.

SimplyMichael -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 4:03:02 PM)
Actually, many of have hung out. JeffBC and I used to have coffee together and laugh over posts Nueva Vida and Bita Trouble and I have met any number of times Lady Pact n I spent a drunken evening at Mercnbeths arguing over leather A lot of others I have met like Mercbeth, Steele who gave up on this place Many others I know people in real life who have met them in real life

LadyPact -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 4:09:23 PM)
Yeah, it was still like pulling teeth. (I was actually waiting to see if you were going to have issues with the definitions I had on the matter.)

HarryVanWinkle -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 4:16:05 PM)
I don't bother with the difference between a dom and a master. I'm only concerned with people who know the difference between fantasy and reality and those who don't. From the OP's comments here and profile, I'd put him in the latter category.

LeatherBentOne51 -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 5:16:10 PM)
OP is beyond words therefore I remain silent. LBO51

DarkSteven -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 7:22:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Actually, many of have hung out. JeffBC and I used to have coffee together and laugh over posts Nueva Vida and Bita Trouble and I have met any number of times Lady Pact n I spent a drunken evening at Mercnbeths arguing over leather A lot of others I have met like Mercbeth, Steele who gave up on this place Many others I know people in real life who have met them in real life Just wanted to add that UllrsIshtar and her Dom/husband had dinner with me and my sub a while back.

UllrsIshtar -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 8:07:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarkSteven quote: ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael Actually, many of have hung out. JeffBC and I used to have coffee together and laugh over posts Nueva Vida and Bita Trouble and I have met any number of times Lady Pact n I spent a drunken evening at Mercnbeths arguing over leather A lot of others I have met like Mercbeth, Steele who gave up on this place Many others I know people in real life who have met them in real life Just wanted to add that UllrsIshtar and her Dom/husband had dinner with me and my sub a while back. Yeah we did, had a great time, should do that again if I can ever again make it out of this pit-hole of a town that universe has trapped me in to punish me for all my years of partying and living live fabulously.

RandysBitch -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 8:20:56 PM)
No adjustment, we were perfect from the 1st day we met.

hrxxx -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 9:47:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Slavetrucking really wow you do not really know what a Master is really that's why this is a site for fakes !! A master is raised a Dom is self taught Yes you are right, ther is a lot of fakes her, and that also meens ther is a lot of fake comments on this board.

BambiBoi -> RE: What the difference between Dominant and Master. (6/13/2013 9:53:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hrxxx quote: ORIGINAL: Slavetrucking really wow you do not really know what a Master is really that's why this is a site for fakes !! A master is raised a Dom is self taught Yes you are right, ther is a lot of fakes her, and that also meens ther is a lot of fake comments on this board. Hrxxx, I apologize for my first interaction with you. I was dismissive of you because I felt it would help in defense of a friend. In turn, you made some comments that were less than respectful, but well deserved. I'm willing to put the past behind me if you are. Maybe we can start over? I think the difference between a master and a dominant is that a master has risen to a level of meta-understanding about the field. It is apparent that a master can teach others from his or her experience. I take it you disagree. Why do you disagree?

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