RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 4:20:00 AM

kiwisub12

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For most of the time I was married, my sex drive was in the toilet - because I worked outside the house, had two kids and did all the housework. For me, foreplay would have been help with the dishes or vaccuming or almost anything that gave me a bit of time to get some energy. My ex - needless to say - didn't get this. There is a reason he is an ex - thoughtless, cruel, unreasonable - you choose.

If husbands realized that touching someone and doing something thoughtful - like changing the sheets or washing the rugrats - was amazing foreplay, they might get more sex in their marriage. Oddly enough, I don't think they want to.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 6:35:57 AM

Duskypearls

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Personally, my libido is either thwarted or enhanced depending upon the quality and caliber of a man.

The door to my libido is locked shut when a man is immature, unbalanced, selfish, disdainful, inconsiderate, careless, negligent, inconsistent, thoughtless, insensitive irresponsible, lazy, shallow, rude, hurtful, weak and dishonest.

When I come upon one who has high standards for himself, is honest, scrupulous, accountable, attentive, respectful, introspective, self-disciplined, prudent, courageous, considerate and strong of mind and heart (in a healthy and positive way), the lock on my mind and heart comes flying off of the door, of its own accord.

In the presence of a trustworthy man my libido awakens and blooms gloriously, and puts and keeps me "in heat."

To me, there is no greater aphrodisiac, and when that occurs, sexually, I can neither give enough, nor get enough.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 8:36:06 AM

Zonie63

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quote:

ORIGINAL: egern

I do not know where to put this, so I put it here:

This is an interview with an author publishing a new book on women's sexuality.

Women and sex: the myth-buster

"..a new book by the American author Daniel Bergner, called What Do Women Want?"

What always strikes me is that whenever someone writes a new book on "what do women want," it always seems like all the other umpteen million books on the same subject were all wrong, and this is the book that's right.

The article mentioned some element of science to it, with some experiment where women and men are hooked up to some machine to test their sexual arousal. I was never quite sure how these machines were supposed to work or how reliable they are. They make me think they're something between a lie detector test and those cheesy "sex appeal test" arcade machines which I haven't seen in years.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 9:51:23 AM

egern

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quote:

The one odd thing, though, is that almost every study says a significant percentage of woman have a hard time having an orgasm or even having one at all, if so, how does that play into this? Do they have a problem because they suppress their sexuality, as this guy says, is it physical, or it is that their lovers/husbands suck in bed? (I ask this seriously)....if women are so overtly sexual, then why do so many have trouble with the basic drive of sex, orgasm/pleasure?

I think it is the different upbringing men and women experience and the cultural down fall from religion, which also hits non-religious people.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 9:59:59 AM

egern

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quote:

What a load of crock. Anthropologically speaking, women are always going to be attracted to monogamy. Men like to know the child they are helping to raise is theirs, and women need the security it provides. Humans raise their children for such a long period of time, that security is essential for successful procreation. This is written into our DNA.

No one has ever proven any such thing in any DNA.

Many primates are not monogamous at all, and they get along fine. In most species the mothers raise the off spring themselves, without any help from any 'fathers'. I can't believe people keep repeating this nonsense.

Considering the fact that women can now decide not to have kids if they do not want to, and can support themselves as well as a kid, this does not sound very reasonable.

Speaking for myself, I have never been monogamous, and I know a lot of poly people who aren't either, and I do consider myself abnormal in any way.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 10:03:17 AM

egern

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quote:

I appreciate the idea that women's sexuality has been misportrayed for years, that women for example don't have a high sex drive, women aren't capable of 'carousing' the way men do, there is the pseudo evolutionary idea men want to spread their seed around, women want a monogamous relationship, a lot of bullshit. Women are supposedly not into visual stimulation when it comes to sex, what studies have shown is that women react differently to visual stimuli and to what kind, but they do react. The fact that women can have more orgasms then men, can go a long time without having one, could be biological, that it would tend to allow her to have sex with more than one man and guarantee she got pregnant (I am not saying I believe that or not, just saying it has been posed).

I also think the basic message is that women are not necessarily mono - a refreshing idea and just as scientific - if that's what it is - as what you mention in your first paragraph.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 10:27:08 AM

tazzygirl

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quote:

Many primates are not monogamous at all, and they get along fine. In most species the mothers raise the off spring themselves, without any help from any 'fathers'. I can't believe people keep repeating this nonsense.

And there are some primates who mate for life. And there are many who are monogamous.. not sure where you are going with that.

quote:

I also think the basic message is that women are not necessarily mono - a refreshing idea and just as scientific - if that's what it is - as what you mention in your first paragraph.

And what this woman is saying telling you is that to keep me, better make sure I dont have a reason to look elsewhere.

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RE: Women and sex: the myth-buster - 7/9/2013 11:14:00 AM

ChatteParfaitt

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What I stated was my opinion, but feel free to continue to mock years of anthropological research.

Excerpts from an article entitled Are Humans Meant to be Monogamous?

"The human species has evolved to make commitments between males and females in regards to raising their offspring, so this is a bond," said Jane Lancaster, an evolutionary anthropologist at the University of New Mexico. "However that bond can fit into all kinds of marriage patterns – polygyny, single parenthood, monogamy."

The human species is somewhat unique amongst mammals in that fathers do invest in raising children .

"We do know that in humans we do have this pretty strong pair bond, and there's more paternal investment than in most other primates," said Daniel Kruger, a social and evolutionary psychologist at the University of Michigan's School of Public Health.

A very interesting articles entitled Are Human Monogamous or Polygamous?

The article concludes humans are monogamous-ish. In other words, as the sub titles states, it's complicated.

BTW: The above article has some ideas about penis spikes, or the lack of them.

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