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RE: Old adages - 7/11/2013 8:12:55 PM

littlewonder

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RE: Old adages - 7/11/2013 8:42:59 PM

stef

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Joined: 1/26/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Yeah, really.

Perhaps this adage would be more appropriate for certain folks here to remember:

It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt.

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RE: Old adages - 7/11/2013 8:43:16 PM

Duskypearls

Posts: 3561
Joined: 8/21/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SeekingTrinity

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

quote:

ORIGINAL: wckdmnd

and because you've never heard of it. it can't possibly exist can it. this is becoming tiresome

What got your panties in a bunch??? I was not saying it was or was NOT a adage I pointed out that after more years than I care to count being active in the BDSM community I've never heard it said.

So knock that chip off your shoulder and stop being so defensive.

BadOne

I'm thinking that all us not tripping over ourselves in a rush to agree might have started the journey of the undies into the Crack of Ass. The fact that a number of us who have been in BDSM for a bit haven't heard of this particular gem caused the twisting.

I nominate this for Sunny Quote of the Day. Hugely funny!

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RE: Old adages - 7/11/2013 10:28:15 PM

tazzygirl

Posts: 37833
Joined: 10/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wckdmnd

No. Not tiresome because you've never heard of it. It's old to me because I heard it first 30 some odd years ago. It's not old to others cause they never heard it before. ok. why then, whether it's old or not to an individual, does that make it a sticking point? I'll admit. I'm offended by tazzygirl and stef and if I said why, I would break the ToS. But I've always found them to be offensive creatures. So, it's nothing new. Anyway, my take on the adage is that a sub is born means that as she/he grows up from a wee babe to an adult. The influences that are in their lives give them the raw materials of submission. Same with a dominant. But it's just raw material. It takes training to make the sub into a slave. Same as it takes training to make the dominant into a Master. So either is made. That's all really

Im curious if I should be upset or throwing a party at this point. Your opinion of me hardly matters, nor mine of you, I am sure.

I am also curious about the fact that if you have heard this adage for years, why isnt it popping up on a search feature? I am sure you are not the only one to have posed such a belief, yet its difficult to find another source...and I am rather good at finding sources.

Something else that has my curiosity peaked... you didnt start posting until July, yet you insist you have always found me offensive.... what was your other screen name? I find it extremely hard to believe this is the first name you have posted under.

I dont expect any answers really. You have not managed to give any to date, so I dont expect a change in the future.

Just crazy lil things that make me go... hmmmmm.

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RE: Old adages - 7/17/2013 10:06:20 PM

JeffBC

Posts: 5799
Joined: 2/12/2012
From: Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: wckdmnd
Using the old adage a submissive is born a slave is made. a dominant is born a Master is made. Why does it seem to be so much easier for most to accept someone who claims themselves to be slave than those that claim themselves to be Master?

I like kumquats.

I don't know what any of those words means on someone's lips... dom, sub, slave, master? Damnit, I lost my BDSM dictionary. I'm generally uninterested in the labels. I want to grok the person.

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RE: Old adages - 7/17/2013 10:31:53 PM

tazzygirl

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quote:

Damnit, I lost my BDSM dictionary.

Im sure you can find it in the Domme handbook.

http://www.collarchat.com/fb.asp?m=4499318

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RE: Old adages - 7/18/2013 12:23:02 AM

MalcolmNathaniel

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Joined: 9/20/2010
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FR:
All generalizations are false. Including this one. - Mark Twain.

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RE: Old adages - 7/19/2013 7:53:00 AM

graceadieu

Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BambiBoi

We assume following is easier than leading.

People tend to assume someone a "master" maintains ties with the community, has practiced with various implements, has amassed a valuable arsenal of toys and knowledge, is balanced in work and life, plots and plans elaborate scenes. A slave just says "yes" and complies.

Most people don't give slaves enough credit for how hard their place actually is. A careful read of Dyfrynt's post confirms this notion. Dyfyrnt treats slave and sub almost the same, in that a person can be born as either. However, while he mentions a person can be born a dom, he does not deign to suggest one can be born a master. I agree, mastery takes practice. The point is that we're content to say slavery is a natural condition, that does not require practice... Just a submissive with deeper limits.

I think you're right about why people feel that way, but that the idea is very false.

Serving someone (whether you call it slave or sub) on an ongoing basis is a lot of work. It's intimately learning someone else's needs, wants, and preferences - emotional, physical, financial, domestic - and how to meet them and even anticipate them. It oftentimes involves learning new skills and overcoming significant fears and hangups, and may require putting in significant hours on top of a full-time job.

In some ways, I think the dominant/master has the easier role, because their job is to say "do this" - the sub/slave's job is to make it happen. To me, saying a slave or sub has an easy job is like saying a sergeant in the army has an easy job because a CO tells them what to do.

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