Is submission humiliating?

Is submission humiliating? (Full Version)

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TeeGO -> Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:18:18 PM)
There is something inherent in a male submitting to a female that screams the male is humiliating himself in doing so. At least that is the way society view things. Yet, I do feel that myself. I feel that submitting to a female is a humiliating act. That has troubled me until I thought that submission itself is an act of humiliation, whether it’s male to Female, or female to Male, or otherwise. The humbling of oneself to be controlled by another. I guess that is humiliation. This erotic humilation is, I believe, the foundation for my submission. For whatever reason I get a thrill from it. What I'd like to know is if this thinking is solid or am I missing something?

SusanofO -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:29:58 PM)
Some people like being humiliated (me, for instance). I haven't analyzed it all that much. Seriously, to me, there is nothing humiliating about submitting - it feels totally natural. It makes me feel necessary (and protected; can't get enough of feeling protected I guess). So what if you're a guy? If you love it, you love it. Go for it. - Susan

zenofeller -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:30:24 PM)
i wouldn't say female submitting to male is socially humiliating, because historical accident has it that society agreed for most of it's history that is the proper place for any female. there are women still alive today that have in fact raised up with those ideas. humiliation is a very difficult thing to talk about, because it's extremely ill defined. the common easy solution is to say each his own. as such, your thinking can not be but solid, as far as you limit it to yourself. many people would agree with you, saying that humiliation is the foundation of their submission. but you are probably missing something anyway.

Caretakr -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:33:45 PM)
I know about this. Humiliation as an excitement, is based on breaking societal condtioning. It sets one apart from the mainstream, thumbs a nose in the direction of stereotypes, and the politically correct. It's freedom.

CrappyDom -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:44:34 PM)
Teego, While I have never taken a male submissive I have known quite a few. The forms their submission take are highly varied. Some are stoic, some bratty, some submit from a place of strength, others from a place of humiliation. You aren't missing anything, but there is much to see, much to explore, but the most interesting journey is into yourself. Enjoy.

enigmabrat -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:47:33 PM)
No submition itself is not humiliateing... it is beautifull and wonderfull not humiliating

Wulfchyld -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 8:49:28 PM)
TeeGo I would have to say it all depends on where it hits you. I would think some, like Celeste, find great power and reward in submission. benji is very high spirited about his submissive side and wears it like a badge of honor. So again I think it depends on how it hits you.

champagnewishes -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/27/2006 11:34:54 PM)
I am sure that for some subs, this is a form of humiliation and will thrive as such. For me personally, submission has nothing to do with humiliation. Never has submission lowered my self esteem. Just the opposite...it completes me...makes me stronger from the inside out.

DoctorDubious -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:20:06 AM)
Sure, some folks get their jollies from humiliation.... and I say... (warning, joke ahead)... "Less power to 'em". [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m21.gif[/image] But, are submission and humiliation necessarily linked.... ? For me, they are not. Submission is an ancient spiritual path, common in all cultures... My goodness, the second largest religion in the world is called Islam. Islam means submission. DD

Caretakr -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:28:34 AM)
Domination and submision are present in various degrees in us all. They only become more noticable when we move towards the ends of the continuums.

MadameDahlia -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:33:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TeeGO There is something inherent in a male submitting to a female that screams the male is humiliating himself in doing so. At least that is the way society view things. Yet, I do feel that myself. I feel that submitting to a female is a humiliating act. That has troubled me until I thought that submission itself is an act of humiliation, whether it’s male to Female, or female to Male, or otherwise. The humbling of oneself to be controlled by another. I guess that is humiliation. This erotic humilation is, I believe, the foundation for my submission. For whatever reason I get a thrill from it. What I'd like to know is if this thinking is solid or am I missing something? Being humiliated or showing humility? Perhaps both, given the right circumstances... If you've still got the emails we swapped about a month back you already know the way I view the dynamic. But for those who don't... He submits to his Lady (Queen, Princess, etc.) not because he is forced... but because it is in him to show how much he longs to cherish her and how deeply he desires to honor his Lady in both word and deed... While it may not be true for all relationships with an F/m dynamic... it's but one way of looking at what may seem to be to others as peculiar or a socially unacceptable imbalance of power.

Caretakr -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:42:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MadameDahlia quote: ORIGINAL: TeeGO There is something inherent in a male submitting to a female that screams the male is humiliating himself in doing so. At least that is the way society view things. Yet, I do feel that myself. I feel that submitting to a female is a humiliating act. That has troubled me until I thought that submission itself is an act of humiliation, whether it’s male to Female, or female to Male, or otherwise. The humbling of oneself to be controlled by another. I guess that is humiliation. This erotic humilation is, I believe, the foundation for my submission. For whatever reason I get a thrill from it. What I'd like to know is if this thinking is solid or am I missing something? Being humiliated or showing humility? Perhaps both, given the right circumstances... If you've still got the emails we swapped about a month back you already know the way I view the dynamic. But for those who don't... He submits to his Lady (Queen, Princess, etc.) not because he is forced... but because it is in him to show how much he longs to cherish her and how deeply he desires to honor his Lady in both word and deed... While it may not be true for all relationships with an F/m dynamic... it's but one way of looking at what may seem to be to others as peculiar or a socially unacceptable imbalance of power. We are worlds apart from the world. And the realities that we create within our spheres are as valid as any other.[;)]

onyurknees -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:47:29 AM)
TeeGO, IMO, submission comes from a place of strength that permits the submittor to give it all up because his (or her) inner core is so solid. If it feels humiliating - and there is no doubt that our societies on earth for the most part have viewed a male submitting to a Female as a humiliation - then you simply have to ask whether that feels right for you or not. I believe that if it does, then society can go hang and you should revel in your 'humiliating' submission. Submission or humiliation (humbliing) are only negatives if they ultimately make us feel negative about ourselves. If they give us thrills, a sense of completion or wholeness, then rock on and enjoy every brilliantly humiliating moment. After all, no man is more a man, a whole and delightful being, than when he is at (or under) the foot of a Woman... or so it feels to Me... but I might be a tad prejudiced in that matter...[;)] Lynn

MadameDahlia -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 12:51:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Caretakr We are worlds apart from the world. And the realities that we create within our spheres are as valid as any other.[;)] Grins My reality tends to change on a daily basis... and also sometimes varies depending on how much sugar I've had. Hurray for sugar!

Lordandmaster -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 1:08:22 AM)
If it works for you, that's really all that matters. quote: ORIGINAL: TeeGO What I'd like to know is if this thinking is solid or am I missing something?

Caretakr -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 1:15:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MadameDahlia quote: ORIGINAL: Caretakr We are worlds apart from the world. And the realities that we create within our spheres are as valid as any other.[;)] Grins My reality tends to change on a daily basis... and also sometimes varies depending on how much sugar I've had. Hurray for sugar! And let's not forget caffiene,wheeeeee!!!!!!![:D]

meatcleaver -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 1:41:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zenofeller i wouldn't say female submitting to male is socially humiliating, because historical accident has it that society agreed for most of it's history that is the proper place for any female. there are women still alive today that have in fact raised up with those ideas. Society agreed nothing and nor was it an accident (it can't be both anyway). Society whether for economic and social reasons or for genetic reasons (who really knows) developed that way. We now live in a modern technological society were the division of labour along the line of the sexes is no longer necessary for the most part.

darkinshadows -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 2:08:17 AM)
No it isnt humiliating - unless you want it to be. If it suits you - go with it. But submission isn't humiliating from everyone. And sometimes - it is on only specific occassions. Everyone views it differently. Peace and Rapture

RavenMuse -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 2:27:56 AM)
I can't speak for male to Female submission but I've delt with enough girls over the last 25 years that I can say with certanty that female to Male submission in the main has nothing to do in the slightest with humiliation. For most of My girls it has been a natural and even freeing/liberating experience. Given them a sense of security and safety in being who they are rather than being what society tells them they should be. Several have said quite the opposite, that when forced into vanilla settings and expected to be an equal to someone they have started caring about, THAT feels humiliating to them. Forced to sit there uncomfortably and accept him 'serving' her when every part of her nature wants to serve him. (Not the same as when a Master 'decides' to do something for his girl... the diffrent dynamic and reasons take away the discomfort and allows even passive submission!)

irishbynature -> RE: Is submission humiliating? (6/28/2006 2:48:37 AM)
If that element of submission is what thrills you then I think you're on the path of still learning and understanding your own limits. Humiliation isn't my path or thrill but it certainly shouldn't lessen your experience (smiles). To each his/her own...enjoy the discovery[;)] Irish

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