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DadD4SubFems -> RE: Snap out of it! (8/7/2013 7:43:23 PM)
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As someone who was suicidally depressed for a 9-10 month period in his adult life, I can share what worked for me.
First of all, I needed a confidante, someone who had also experienced depression in his or her life. Someone who I could be totally honest with and who was probably 90% listener and 10% respondent. I found that in a woman friend who had a hot tub at her house. We would sit in the tub and talk, and talk, and talk. She never judged me or gave me simplistic solutions. She had been through a similar time in her own life and she shared with me what had worked for her. That helped me to not be so down on myself, for my inability to "just snap out of it." And it really helped me to know that she had been at least as depressed as I was, and yet at the time of our countless conversations, she was an inspiration of recovery. It showed me that my misery truly wasn't going to last forever. (And the hot tub sessions made me sleep better, as well.)
Second, I started seeing a therapist. I could only afford to do so every second week on my health plan at work. He provided a nuts & bolts approach that kept me moving forward. He also helped me to understand what parts of my experience were common among depressed people and which were unique to me. We eventually figured out that my bout of depression was due to post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), from my two tours of duty in Vietnam... in those days, the term PTSD had yet to be coined. Being able to assign a "why" to my depression was very helpful, as I'm a very analytical personality. It helped me to see that I wasn't just "losing my mind." My therapist was a tremendous help and anticipating those sessions gave me something to look forward to.
Third, at my therapist's recommendation, I started going out and walking briskly EVERY day... rain, shine, snow, or blow. In the beginning, I'd log up about a mile, round-trip. Sometimes I'd do it twice a day, if my mood was darker that day. Very soon, I was briskly walking 2-3 miles every day. Within my first couple of weeks of daily walks, I started to feel a mood uplift, after each walk. It would come along about 20-30 minutes after I 'd get home. I'd take advantage of that mood elevation to see to it that I was eating properly. Throw in about 4-6 ounces a day of semi-sweet dark chocolate, spaced throughout the day. It contains a powerful natural anti-depressant and mood elevator. I've been doing that chocolate routine daily, ever since I elevated myself out of that depression in the early 1980's and it still works beautifully!
Frankly, I give a huge amount of the credit for my 9-month recovery to the walking and other forms of aerobic exercise, such as a Jazzercise class that I also signed up for (upbeat music plus exercise combined to be a great healer for me, and I made some new friends, too.). Exercising dumps feel-good chemicals, called endorphins, into your bloodstream, shortly after you complete the exercise. Plus, when you physically exhaust yourself, you sleep better. At least I did.
And bear in mind that the bleakest part of the day is when you get up in the morning. Your morale will typically improve as the day progresses, to the point that the evenings can feel almost normal. My personal mantra, upon awakening in the morning was: "This can't last forever." I would repeat it aloud at least 15 or 20 times every morning, upon awakening. That helped to give me hope, also.
If anything I've shared here might work for you, too, use it with my blessings. Though it might feel that way now, your mood issue truly is NOT going to last forever. The day will come when you can serve as that trusted confidante for another person who is struggling then, as you're struggling now.
And, as was mentioned above in a preceding post, spending time with household pets that love you unconditionally, can be very therapeutic as well.
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