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RE: What happened to my post? - 12/11/2013 9:14:05 PM   
Moonlightmaddnes


Posts: 958
Joined: 6/4/2012
Status: offline 		Sometimes I am sure people are joking with their posts. You had a different profile with six thousand posts and you start a thread wondering where your post went? hahahaha OK. I have been here, what uh two years maybe and I would know that either it got deleted or the boards ate it.

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Profile   Post #: 21
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/11/2013 9:37:33 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		Ok, so you're different.....just like everyone else.

Most people who feel different just learn to live with what they are given and live a happy life despite what they feel makes them different. Just because you are xxy does not make you different just like being gay or yellow or 7 feet tall doesn't either.



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Profile   Post #: 22
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/11/2013 10:46:48 PM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantalust

I have since found out for I have received a gold message and as to newbie, I was last on here with some six thousand odd posts under a different name. The lesson is never judge a book by it's cover.

And edited to add those who have replied, I have conversed with some on here before, where we enjoyed a mutual understanding where I hope new names and post counts do not diminish respect given?


It would be more wrong of the mods to write to you assuming you had thousands of posts experience, considering the evidence before them says otherwise. They judged based on the information before them. (And the whole point of a book cover is to help you judge a book - no one has the time to read every book in the library to find their information, just as the mods and posters can't be expected to learn everything about you before speaking to you).

Likewise you can't expect people to use their psychic powers and treat you like an old friend if they don't know who you are.

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Profile   Post #: 23
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 12:51:59 AM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		If you lose your post, won't the fence fall down?

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Profile   Post #: 24
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 1:18:37 AM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Hey Tantalust,

I don't think that the board has changed that much, perhaps you were active before I joined.

It does seem like you've got some very very interesting things to say - and I'll admit to not knowing enough about the issues that intersex people face.

If you can figure out why it is your op was deleted, then you should be able to have some really interesting discussions here.

If you can't, then perhaps this just isn't the place for you?

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Profile   Post #: 25
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 5:14:10 AM   
VideoAdminChi


Posts: 3086
Joined: 8/6/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

None whatsoever. Posts evaporate from time to time around here for reasons I can't discern. While normally that phenomenon doesn't bug me, sometimes I've put a lot of time and consideration into a reply only to watch it disappear into the ether. You can ask a mod what gives.


The OP has been told why his thread was removed and how he needs to edit it to repost it.

In general, if your post was removed in response to one that required removal, you may write to me to get your content back to repost.

Rarely, we pull a thread to review and clean it, but if it was so bad as to require pulling, it's probably not coming back.

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Profile   Post #: 26
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 5:47:11 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantalust
as an inter sex male where because I look male I am treated as such. I am not transgender, where there is more understanding for trans than there is for inter sex where in western society the medics try to fix us into one one side of the binary or the other through transgender. I am resisting medical intervention through the belief other societies can accept inter sex so it is time western society learned to do so, considering it considers itself advanced.


That's your problem, not society's. You look male, so people treat you as such. It's YOUR responsibility to let people know you're different, and how you'd want to be treated.
quote:



And why is it people are so aggressive?


Y'know something? I've noticed that in the past few months. I'm not sure what it is. But the level of welcome ain't what it used to be for newbies. Even born-again newbies like you.

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The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

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RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 6:38:58 AM   
MissKittyDeVine


Posts: 1054
Joined: 9/24/2011
Status: offline 		Probably a weary response born of ennui. We've just seen too many new posters blundering in and opening with aggression or petulance.

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Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 6:42:10 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantalust


quote:

ORIGINAL: VideoAdminChi

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDarkArt

None whatsoever. Posts evaporate from time to time around here for reasons I can't discern. While normally that phenomenon doesn't bug me, sometimes I've put a lot of time and consideration into a reply only to watch it disappear into the ether. You can ask a mod what gives.


The OP has been told why his thread was removed and how he needs to edit it to repost it.

In general, if your post was removed in response to one that required removal, you may write to me to get your content back to repost.

Rarely, we pull a thread to review and clean it, but if it was so bad as to require pulling, it's probably not coming back.






Your thread Males are shit was removed. Feel free to change all of the instances of this to question form rather than a statement of fact and repost.

Yes and my form was that of explaining my position and then asking my question, where it was at the end of my statement, whereby viewers may have understood where I derived my question, because in doing so answers to questions may have totally different responses where there is no background information and I was seeking the more intellectual response.

Observe media, journalism, for you will find my prose there, statements before questions asked is standard practice.


Be very careful posting conversations in PMs here on the message boards. That's very likely to get the admins to delete threads as well.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to Tantalust)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 7:53:46 AM   
VideoAdminChi


Posts: 3086
Joined: 8/6/2012
Status: offline 		FR,

It has always been the rule to not discuss specific moderation action. Questions about letters one receives should be asked of the moderator who sent the letter, or to me.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 8:31:51 AM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		Alrighty then. When men see you, and you present to them as a male, they should somehow by some magic mojo realize that you are in fact an inter sex male? Is this what you're saying?

Cause I can see that happening NEVER.

Perhaps you should think about this:

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Dude, this has nothing to do with the forums changing and everything to do with understanding social norms which it seems you have difficulty with, most likely because you're too bitter, jaded and angry to see otherwise.






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Profile   Post #: 31
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 8:53:31 AM   
angelikaJ


Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline 		So, can you express how you would prefer to be treated?

Are you having difficulty in explaining how you are different?

Even from your posts, I don't have any idea of either what your expectations are or how in an ideal world you want people to view you and treat you.

There are people whose gender identity does not define them, just as there are people whose sexual identity (what all their varied preferences are) does not define them.
And there are some people whose fetish or kink or gender preference have become their identities and they can not see that by doing so they have put themselves into a box.

We are not mind readers.

Perhaps this will help you better get across your wants and needs:
http://www.cnvc.org/learn/nvc-foundations

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Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 9:10:16 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline 		FR~

I think most of the problem is that people, for whatever reason, who carry a huge block on their shoulder, expect other people to make allowances for their views or behaviour.
Unfortunately, most societies don't or won't do that.
If you are considerably different in some aspect that causes you problems within society, the onus is usually on those being different to either hide that difference (and live with it) or to openly tell/show society how and why you are different and also how you would like to be treated.
Unfortunately, not many humans are gifted with mind-reading skills or exceptional insight to know what is going on inside.

There are many who are very different and make a good life for themselves.
Sadly, just like OP, many are just uber-angry because other people cannot understand their inner anguish.
For those carrying such a burden... make yourself clear and unambiguous so others know what you are about.
Being angry at the world is soo self-destructive and just not worth it.

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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 10:47:10 AM   
Tantalust


Posts: 32
Joined: 12/3/2012
Status: offline 		Externally I am male albeit an underdeveloped male, I still have my teen physique, internally I am not wholly male in that and it has been observed by friends at my local munch that my body language isn't male, it's more female than anything else. But because I look male, I am treated as male and one's appearance is that cover a book is judged by. Can anyone see the problem as far as meeting others is concerned?

Now chuck in a bit of autism and what do you have.

But I am arriving at the distinct impression males are born condemned through the actions of a minority, where that minority paints all males even those that are not very male.

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Profile   Post #: 34
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 11:08:22 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Tantalust
But I am arriving at the distinct impression males are born condemned through the actions of a minority, where that minority paints all males even those that are not very male.

That is your problem to deal with, unfortunately.

Even though people have told you that your mannerisms and body language are more female than male, that in itself, doesn't make you female.
This is something you need to deal with yourself and not rely on others to do that for you.

And as a 'normal' male, I do not find any inherent condemnation from a minority.
I suspect this is the root source of your huge chip on your shoulder.
You need to make your own person and disregard what other people say to a certain degree.
You appear to be saying you are built male but want to be female because others have indicated your body language is female?
That seems to be an internal struggle that only you can really deal with.

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Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 12:19:27 PM   
Rochsub2009


Posts: 2536
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

Likewise you can't expect people to use their psychic powers and treat you like an old friend if they don't know who you are.



I've been trying to figure out why he won't identify himself. Any old friends would probably like to know that he's back. Others many understand how to treat him if they can recall his 6,000 posts. His desire for anonymity is baffling.

Also, I have been trying to think of how I would treat someone like him on a first face-to-face meeting. He says that he looks like a guy. So that's how I would treat him. I'm not sure how I'd know that he desired to be treated as a woman (at least I assume he wants to be treated as a woman).

I hope that the OP at least understands how his situation is a bit confusing. He can't blame us for not knowing how to behave in a situation that most of us have never faced before. IMO, becoming angry isn't the right response. IMO, he needs to be patient.....VERY patient. Expecting total strangers to understand his situation, and respond to him accordingly, is both unrealistic and unfair. As others have stated, we can't read minds. So how are we supposed to know that he's not a "normal" guy?

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Profile   Post #: 36
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 12:26:12 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It may be natural for you to respond with anger, but is that helping you connect with others or does it make things worse?

If your anger is making you more isolated and more angry, then I would strongly suggest you learn new ways of coping. Because doing the same thing over and over while expecting a different response is a good definition of insanity.

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Profile   Post #: 37
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 12:35:19 PM   
AthenaSurrenders


Posts: 3582
Joined: 3/15/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009


I've been trying to figure out why he won't identify himself. Any old friends would probably like to know that he's back. Others many understand how to treat him if they can recall his 6,000 posts. His desire for anonymity is baffling.



Is there any forum rule that prevents me from posting the old username? I don't think he's really trying to hide it as such since he's given a huge number of clues and expects us to treat him as though he were the poster we used to know.

_____________________________

Being your slave, what should I do but tend
Upon the hours and times of your desire?

(in reply to Rochsub2009)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 1:48:02 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		To the best of My knowledge, we've only had one semi-regular forum poster who has identified as xxy over the past five years. Pretty simple deduction.

OP, are you willing to alter the post that was removed with the recommendations that the Mod gave you? It's kind of hard to discuss a post we've never seen.


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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What happened to my post? - 12/12/2013 3:15:58 PM   
VideoAdminGamma


Posts: 2233
Status: offline 		If the OP does not wish to post his previous user name then by default anyone posting it would be borderline posting it in a negative fashion. That is against the forum rules. If the OP wishes to divulge that information, it is on them.

Thanks for making CollarMe a better place,
Gamma


quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders


quote:

ORIGINAL: Rochsub2009


I've been trying to figure out why he won't identify himself. Any old friends would probably like to know that he's back. Others many understand how to treat him if they can recall his 6,000 posts. His desire for anonymity is baffling.



Is there any forum rule that prevents me from posting the old username? I don't think he's really trying to hide it as such since he's given a huge number of clues and expects us to treat him as though he were the poster we used to know.



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Profile   Post #: 40
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