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planomaid -> RE: Humiliation and the Insecure Dominant? (7/5/2006 6:16:56 PM)
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ORIGINAL: MistressDREAD
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I meant for that to be addressed to those people who enjoy inflicting pain and suffering on others not because their victim enjoys it (or even fully consents to it), but because they get off on others suffering for their own amusement or purpose. I personally think they are really no better than say people like Pol Pot or Joseph Mengele. Yeah, pretty heavy company there, but I really dislike those kinds of people and I tend to avoid interacting with them as much as possible.
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I was asking about someone who identifies as a dominant as a way to prey upon the unsuspecting. These people are (hopefully) shunned by the community because they give all of us a bad name. They are the ones who lure people into bad situations,
My kink is not yours. My releases are not like yours. What you feel is right I feel is wrong and what I feel is right you feel is wrong. Who is right and who is wrong ? I say We are both equally right in Our wrongs, dont like that reality then you are biased, intolerant to differance you dont agree with, and on the edge of being seen as normal. GASP!
I as a Dominant am deemed by many to be a preying Bitch because I humiliate unsuspecting. Again Ill say, its one of My perversions and no I will NOT be shunned by the very community thats very base is here for those like Me who form the
unaccepted norms of society. We dont give all bad names, on the contraray its those like vanilla subbies who give this alternate lifestyle the bad name in their tempts to try and conform Us to a way thats more accepted to society as a whole.(Im never gonna be there nor have a desire to be. ) We will NEVER be accepted as such by the majority and if you cannot handle such maybe being a nonconformist in a conformist society is not for you even if you have hung around for 20 plus years. My humiliation ways has nothing to do with insecurity as a Dominant but has everything to do with gaining reactions from certain people to find what lies underneith their role or personna here online on sites where I seek to find the deaper person as well as in real life introducing the majority to the minorities like Me to My kind of lifestyles ways. I suppose if you are not a Sadist or a masocist who seeks out Our kinks it is next to impossible to understand. But sugar coated niceness just totally gags Me and I will never be one of these kinds of conforming folks. Nor do I tempt to hide who or what I am from the masses here because it is very important for all to better understand Us who stand on the extream side of the right far from the soft side of the left. Good subject, One I am addressing in other areas here as well currently.
I wasn't aware that by stating preferences and likes/dislikes that would automatically equate me with being biased and intolerant. I never said that my opinions were the defacto standard of the community. What I DID say that was that I didn't like to associate with people who were cruel and vicious without regard to others. To the best of my knowledge, a sadist who inflicts their kink on a non-masochist, with no regard for the care of their bottom, is usually shunned by the community. It could be different in other communities, but not in mine. We have people in mine who will cheerfully take a bullwhip to you, for their pleasure, for yours, and for the crowds. But they won't do it to someone that cannot take it or does not consent to it. Experimentation to find out what a bullwhip feels like is one thing, abuse without consent is another.
There are many "flavors" of the lifestyle. Some dabble (vanilla), some are hardcore (chocolate), and many lie somewhere between them(neaopolitan?). Shunning you, interacting with you, or not, is my choice. Just as it is your choice to do the same. So long as you gain the acceptance and agreement of those you humiliate and those in the vicinity when you do your humiliation, then I have no issue with that. Everyone is in agreement with your actions. It may not be my kink, but that does not mean what you are doing is wrong. But if you do so nonconsensually, then I would take issue.
Just as you state, we have disparate views of things. You have chosen one path, I another. It's not to say I have not beat, whipped, flogged, spanked, fucked and generally inflicted pain on someone else for their enjoyment. I have. And I will most likely in the future if that is what my partner enjoys. It's not my particular kink, but it is theirs. I do not derive joy from the act, but I do enjoy and share in their pleasure.
As you have stated, if you are not into "sugar" then you will not understand me - it works both ways. While we may not agree on things, that does not mean we cannot discuss our views, our kinks, our opinions and learn from each other. If not technique, then at least understanding, and if not that, then at least tolerance.
You should not hide that which you are. There is no reason for that here. Be WHO you are, WHAT you are, and be proud of it. It is apparent that you are already doing so, and that is good. Not just for you, but for others as well. I think it highly unlikely that a person will be integrated into all the various lifestyles for many various reasons. Huzzah for you! Huzzah for me! Huzzah for everyone between!
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