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LadyHugs -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 7:18:03 PM)

Dear joyinslavery, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I'll have to agree with you joyinslavery, as I have always been told some thirty years past and to the present, that the dominant bestows a new collar (not used or re-issued) collars onto their submissive/slave.
 
I've never had a slave or submissive buy their own collar.  I've seen so many submissives buy their own collar and it just shoots their efforts down as a collar means that they are owned.  Other than an unlocked padlock as a clue for a submissive/slave looking but, with experienced and those who's owners gifted their former slave/submissive with a the same collar they wore in faithful service; the collar is on the dominant to purchase. 
 
A length of chain at a hardware store is under $5.00 a padlock a few more dollars.  It its very least--I think somebody is worth that much to bestow the collar on them.  I've seen people go to the Dollar Store, get a choke chain for dogs and lock them on.
 
Leather collars can be purchased and or made.  It use to be where dominants made their own collars, as to put their 'spirit' into the collar and make it unique.  Now, one can buy off the rack per se.  But, I am of the days when we made our own floggers and bondage equipment. 
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs



BenignPlague -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 9:03:33 PM)

Perhaps someone can enlighten me, as my opinion may be considered offensive to some without intending it to be.

Isn't anyone into professional domination simply recognizing the fact that they've found a way to make money off of horny men?  I mean, the abundance on online used panty sales is starting to make me wonder what other sorts of people look at the sites I do (CM, craigslist...forgive me, I like looking for free schtuff).

I have a hard time distinguishing the difference between a prostitute taking advantage of the abundance of horny men with money, and the Pro-domme doing the same thing: someone enlighten me.



Jasmyn -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 9:28:59 PM)

Benign yes and no ... depends what side of the fence someone wishes to sit ... when asking the question ... is a prostitute taking advantage of horny men or is she/he catering to horny men/women/people?  Seems a pretty equal relationship whatever way it's looked at. 

Am so over defending professional domination on these boards ... but suffice to say in response to you Benign, and others who may have these questions burning up their tongues ... get an education about professional domination, and I mean professional domination ... not princesses with paypal ...before making blanket statements and/or generalisations of professional dominants on fetish boards ... and yes before anyone asks..the moderators of this forumn have in the past to be of the same thinking ... the CollarMe website and forumns are for everyone one, including the professionals, and including the princesses.






joyinslavery -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 9:40:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

Benign yes and no ... depends what side of the fence someone wishes to sit ... when asking the question ... is a prostitute taking advantage of horny men or is she/he catering to horny men/women/people?  Seems a pretty equal relationship whatever way it's looked at. 

Am so over defending professional domination on these boards ... but suffice to say in response to you Benign, and others who may have these questions burning up their tongues ... get an education about professional domination, and I mean professional domination ... not princesses with paypal ...before making blanket statements and/or generalisations of professional dominants on fetish boards ... and yes before anyone asks..the moderators of this forumn have in the past to be of the same thinking ... the CollarMe website and forumns are for everyone one, including the professionals, and including the princesses.






I agree that generalizations are generally not helpful, but since you mentioned about the CM mods, let me once again say that IMHO, if anyone is using this site to run a business, CM should charge them for the privilege, plain and simple (and keep it free for the rest of us that aren't here to make money).  And before anyone thinks this is just an attack on pro Dommes, yes, that includes pro subs. 



Jasmyn -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 9:48:40 PM)

Joy ... like Russell so sagely states ... we must learn, each one of us, the world was not made for us... no matter how long you may long for this site or others to be ...as you would want ...fate may nevertheless forbid [that] ...from ever happening..



joyinslavery -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 10:04:02 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

Joy ... like Russell so sagely states ... we must learn, each one of us, the world was not made for us... no matter how long you may long for this site or others to be ...as you would want them...fate may nevertheless forbid them...from ever happening...


Well, thanks for bastardizing a great man's quote. 

Be that as it may, I believe, given time, CM may see the wisdom of charging those you use their site to charge others.  And why shouldn't they?  Use of their site allows for advertising/marketing, a ready DB of customers and exposure one wouldn't ordinarily have.  And they own the channel.  Perhaps I should put it in the form of a formal business proposal for the decision-makers here at CM?  Either way, the fact remains, those who are here for profit should pay for the privilege.  Seems like the decent thing to do anyway.  Then again, I don't doubt that sooner rather than later, we'll ALL be paying to use the site so it's probably mute anyway. 

Let me know if you'd like some recommendations on Bertrand Russell.  I doubt his eloquent words regarding renunciation were ever so misused.  I could send you the full quote sometime if you like. 



Jasmyn -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 10:20:16 PM)

Over it



joyinslavery -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 10:43:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jasmyn

quote:

Use of their site allows for advertising/marketing, a ready DB of customers and exposure


It works both ways ... the more numbers, bums on seats, using this site, the more attractive the website to advertisers, the webmasters of this website are no fools ..and more power to them ...the horny net boys and girls with a hand on it will just as likely click on a banner and wank as they would click on a profile ... something I'm sure CollarMe and their advertisers are well aware of ... so be sure to stick that in your proposal when offering CM your unsolicited advice..  

Ps I'm done with discussing the politics of CM as a bdsm/fetish website 


Thanks for making my point.  If you're right, that horny boys and girls will just as likely click on a banner ad as they would to a profile (which I think most here would disagree with), then why NOT treat those profiles the same as the banner ads?  Is it wrong for CM to charge advertisers who choose to put up such banner ads here?  Of course not.  Why then is it wrong for CM to charge for a pro profile?  Isn't it an ad?  Of course it is.  Bums on seats?  I doubt too many of the pros are going anywhere if CM instituted a nominal charge for use of their site.  And even if they did, so what?  I seriously doubt we would hear some great 'sucking sound' as Ross Perot once famously said.  Somehow, I think the site would manage along quite nicely, especially considering those that would be leaving were free users anyway! 

My point is CM needs to view the pro's on this site as a revenue stream.  They have the most to gain (financially) by use of the site.  They also have the most to lose when leaving the site.  CM just needs to recognize that.  Once again, I don't think it's too much to ask from those who use this site for profit to have to give something back for the privilege. 

I'm glad we're having this conversation.  The more it's discussed, the better the chances that CM will recognize the opportunity that exists and, hopefully, stave off the day that we ALL have to pay for use of this site. 

     



MisPandora -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 11:34:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: YourMistress2006

I am new to the Mistress thing. Just wondering if anyone knew of any free sites to find subs? And is Paypal ok to ask for.. I need instructions here.. LOL

I'm wondering what makes you feel qualified in your skills to charge money for what you're doing?



MisPandora -> RE: New Mistress (7/30/2006 11:46:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: joyinslavery

I think if a Dominant asked ME to pay for my own collar, I'd shake my head and walk away.

But, that's just me.

No, you're onto something there.  Personally, the collar is always my property and will always be returned to me should the contract/interest dissolve.  To each his/her own, I suppose.



FelinePersuasion -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 1:19:36 AM)

what about pro submission, can we get ritch that way instead?( giggling)


quote:

ORIGINAL: iliv2servher

quote:

ORIGINAL: IAre you serious?  You are new to this and you're asking about PayPal?  Who on earth is going to pay you for anything? If you have talked with any prodommes you would know that professional domination is not a way to get rich quick.  You need to pay dues and learn what it is all about before going forward with a financial plan.




TeeGO -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 1:53:02 PM)


I know a pro that takes her job seriously. She does not advertise on collarme, she has no intention of doing so. She considers what she does as a service. There are men out there that have needs and cannot find a way to have them met. She feels they deserve quality care. She feels she has great responsibility to them as she gets more personal with them, helping them to discover things and learn. She is sickened by some of the stories they tell of others they have seen and how little care they received.

Myself I feel that the pro's have their place and do provide a service. There are lifestyle subs and there are fetishists. It is to the fetishists that the pros cater to. These men have no desire for real submission, they just want to have their kink fulfilled. The pros provide and make a living from it. I see nothing wrong with that. And let me say I have never seen a pro in their professional capacity and have no desire to do so.



MstrssPassion -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 3:49:51 PM)

I have no issue with pros or their presence here on the boards or any site, so long as they are honest about themselves & what they are seeking. That is all we can ever really ask of anyone on here.

As to whether they should pay for having profile... it wouldn't do any good because they may just cover up that fact in order to post a free profile & then reveal it down the road. This would in turn lead more people to believe that ALL the people on the site are really just out to get their money when they contact a non-pro looking profile & find out different after investing time & effort. (which seems to be the chief complaint of the men on here about pros)

There are so many great ideas that would make this a perfect world (or site) but this isn't a perfect world & the site owners never promised a perfect site. Just a free one... so far. I have had a pay membership on other sites & you know what... there are just as many if not more pros on those as there are here & there darn sure are just as many if not more wankers/irritating jerk-offs.

I joined this site right after it started. I have truly met far more genuine & sincere people here than any other site I have ever belonged to... before b.com went to pay I met lots of interesting people & I enjoyed the boards... since it went to pay I don't receive any mail at all & the boards become such a mess I can't keep track of topics anymore. ALT really doesn't have a great deal of thought or time invested in their boards/blogs & they seemed to focus on upgrading their chat features. I'm not a chatter so again I lost interest on the site. I still get lots of mail, but can only see thumbnail images on profiles. By far I like this site over the others & if I had to pay for a site... I'd pay for this one out of those three mentioned here. I haven't really looked at many other sites.

[sm=wave.gif] As a side note... If there are so many gosh darn pros on this site offering services... why the heck do I have so many men soliciting me & offering me tributes? Do we actually have a shortage of pros on the site & the paying clients are now contacting the non-pros? Or are a majority of the pros advertising on this site a joke & the guys who pay know enough to not bother with these types?

Kinda makes me go hmmmm [sm=confused.gif]



Misstoyou -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 4:32:46 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

[sm=wave.gif] As a side note... If there are so many gosh darn pros on this site offering services... why the heck do I have so many men soliciting me & offering me tributes?



I love this question! Isn't that the truth. Based on the offers that even middle-aged-me gets, YourMistress2006, as a sweet young thing, will have plenty of offers of tribute without any marketing...which it looks like she's discovered since the paypal reference has been removed from her profile.



joyinslavery -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:02:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Misstoyou

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

[sm=wave.gif] As a side note... If there are so many gosh darn pros on this site offering services... why the heck do I have so many men soliciting me & offering me tributes?



I love this question! Isn't that the truth. Based on the offers that even middle-aged-me gets, YourMistress2006, as a sweet young thing, will have plenty of offers of tribute without any marketing...which it looks like she's discovered since the paypal reference has been removed from her profile.


Yes, but I think there's a clear distinction between tribute that is demanded and tribute that is offered from a sincere heart. 

Then again, when it's offered out of sheer desperation, it beomes something much more pathetic.



Misstoyou -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:19:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: joyinslavery

Yes, but I think there's a clear distinction between tribute that is demanded and tribute that is offered from a sincere heart.

Then again, when it's offered out of sheer desperation, it beomes something much more pathetic.


Agreed. Although, quite frankly, a lot of "tribute" offers I receive are neither, simply a "submissive" male trying to get what he wants on *his* terms.



MstrssPassion -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:25:54 PM)

Maybe I should have elaborated or picked a different word, so don't think of tribute as the way many of us may view it... look at as some guy offering hundreds of dollars to me in order to get my attention... tribute, generous gift or 'even how much would I need to pay you' has been only a few different ways this topic of accepting payment has been presented to me.

I just don't get it.



MissAlison -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:27:17 PM)

Just a quick note, then I will drop it altogether....when I mentioned My sub buying her own collar, I said FIRST collar.....by first collar I mean a collar to signify My consideration of them, not the collar I give them if and when I put them under ownership. Perhaps this is wrong. Every O/one is entitled to their opinions, and I dont fault any of Y/you for Y/yours. Just felt the need to point that out, before an opinion is formed about Me that I am not the Domme I portray Myself to be.



joyinslavery -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:40:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissAlison

Just a quick note, then I will drop it altogether....when I mentioned My sub buying her own collar, I said FIRST collar.....by first collar I mean a collar to signify My consideration of them, not the collar I give them if and when I put them under ownership. Perhaps this is wrong. Every O/one is entitled to their opinions, and I dont fault any of Y/you for Y/yours. Just felt the need to point that out, before an opinion is formed about Me that I am not the Domme I portray Myself to be.


Ma'am, I'm sorry if I came across as confrontational.  I truly believe everyone has a right to do things as they see fit and in a way that works best for them.  You did indeed say first collar and I think that if that works for You, that's all that matters. 



stef -> RE: New Mistress (7/31/2006 5:41:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BenignPlague

I have a hard time distinguishing the difference between a prostitute taking advantage of the abundance of horny men with money, and the Pro-domme doing the same thing: someone enlighten me.

How are these poor men being taken advantage of?  A service is being provided and someone is paying for that service.  It's the same as getting a haircut, a massage, having someone change your oil, or paying the kid down the street to mow your lawn.  Who in any of these instances is being taken advantage of?

~stef



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