Lies In A Profile (Full Version)

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masterLon3446 -> Lies In A Profile (11/20/2004 4:59:48 AM)

Why do women lie in thier profiles?, if they seek one thing and ask for something else, I do not understand. I have read profiles of ladies that say height/weight no problem and age no problem, when I email them they write back "sorry your too old for me" or "your too big for me" this is becoming irritating. Some write back and say they want "realtime only", problem here is they have not even taken the time to read my profile as I clearly state that is exactly what I am seeking, I do not cyber period. I have been in this lifestyle for 40 years, still I do not understand women..lol. Some say they are slaves, but they do not want a Master/slave relationship, others say they are submissive only and not a slave, but they seeking a Master. I am sure that men lie in thier profiles also, but I am a heterosexual male and do not look in their profiles. Women ask for a picture, when one is sent, no more communication, They ask for regular emails addresses, when one is sent they never answer, They promise they will email, but they never do. they do not answer emails, I have two emails I sent out almost two weeks ago and no answer yet, heck they haven't even read them yet, but, they have been online almost everyday. Now i am wondering if this site only for pretenders, liars and fakes......just like that other site "AFF". Maybe I am seeking a woman that no longer exists, a slave, that I can love protect and cherish for the rest of my life...The posts made on the message boards are very intelligently written. from some very responsible people, I do not agree with all the posts but, I do respect thier posts. so some people here do have intelligence and are real... Be happy..
MasterLon



merrymasochist -> RE: Lies In A Profile (11/20/2004 5:39:13 AM)

~sympathetic smile~
i wish i could offer you some insight, but the situation you speak of can be found on both sides of the coin... online services can often be likened to panning for gold... one has to sift through a lot of sand to strike the jackpot... the best advice i can give you is to keep being honest and keep trying... i wish you well and better luck in your search...
sincerely,
merrymasochist



EStrict -> RE: Lies In A Profile (11/20/2004 7:38:58 AM)

Merry has it right Sir...

As you mentioned, you have read the boards. If you read *ask a submissive/slave*, *general* and even the *lounge* you will often see complaints about the lying online. There is also the simple anonymity of online means that it's so much EASIER to lie. Granted, people who want to be dishonest can be so as easily in person as online, but the type of lies are not always the same.

After all,, in person you can *single* while the sig. other is sitting in a bar that you are *forgetting*, and you can *say* you are 25 when you are 30, BUT you can't be 5'4 102 when you are really 5'7 and 245. You can take your time, write, rewrite, proof, and do spell and grammar checks online (lol, but I'm sure you have noticed how many don't), but you can't sound like you have brain when you are speaking live and you are really just full of it....

As far as the age/weight issue... I've known people who *think* they don't care about such things (and in general or for friends they don't), but they just are attracted to a certain type... and though there are people who are not in this for sex, if they feel no attraction at all (no spark, chemistry, what have you), isn't it better they be honest?

One last thing... isn't it better to learn about the problems up front than to waste weeks or months and *then* have them tell you they just aren't interested?

Have faith though... there are people out here who say what we mean and mean what we say....



MistressDREAD -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/8/2004 6:45:59 PM)

Lon
I am no slave but I am a Alpha Dominant Poly Gorean Woman whom would appreciate a email from a Dominant Man of experiance once in a while being the Widow of Two, for conversation and discussion and I think it is You whom has limited Your self in what You will accept in open conversation only seeking that * One perfect slave for You. I have always returned emails. The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly. ~wicked smiles~
I have no lies in My profile and live up to anything and everything that I post there.
Im always open to making a new freind and I am in Florida.



Suleiman -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/8/2004 7:33:43 PM)

Hey - I lie in my profile all the time. If people actually knew that I was a single, attractive, uneducated, independantly wealthy, slender, athletic, incredibly hot woman, I'd be inundated with offers!



perverseangelic -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/8/2004 7:54:12 PM)

I think sometimes people thing others are lying because both parties are working under different definitions of the same word or phrase.

Elsewhere on the boards someone mentioned that he had selected chastity as an interest, but was put off when a dominant person expected 100% fulltime chastity. To the person who put it as an interest, chastity meant occational periods in a chasity device. To the other, it meant full time.

I think that sometimes people come in with vastly different deffinitions and expectations for the same sets of words. Often, instead of taking time to realize this, they dismiss the other person as a liar, a fake or a wannabe because the two are using words differently.

I notice this happens on the boards, too. It makes sense, of course. There isn't a coherent dictionary of universally accepted definitions for many of the terms used here.



Nvernilla -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/8/2004 8:28:15 PM)

Hmmmm I havent had this problem at all. As far as *figuring out* the fair gender, as long as you have the mindset that they can be understood as a gender and don't see them for the individuals they are, you may be wondering for a long time. None of us are identical and neither are they...Mike



Falcor64 -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/8/2004 9:20:25 PM)

Lon,
Even if 95% of the folks on the site are liars, pretenders, & fakes, if you give up, who gets hurt?

An alternate view,

Falcor



BeachMystress -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/9/2004 12:28:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Suleiman

Hey - I lie in my profile all the time. If people actually knew that I was a single, attractive, uneducated, independantly wealthy, slender, athletic, incredibly hot woman, I'd be inundated with offers!

Damn, was gonna snap you up till that whole woman part [:)]

quote:

ORIGINAL: masterLon3446
Maybe I am seeking a woman that no longer exists, a slave, that I can love protect and cherish for the rest of my life...




I actually agree with everything posted so far.. *watches for the sky to fall* My bit to add is one I'm starting to become known for.. the ole get yourself to a munch tune. (I actually have people mailing me on the regular site for how to find a munch near them :-) )

OH.. LOL, I just looked.. you're up in Hawthorn. I'm down in Newport Beach. Are you part of the local scene? I've liked everyone I've met in our local area except one drunk Dom who tried to get me to sub to him at Passive Arts last weekend. It was pretty obvious I am Domme.. Not only was I holding a double headed flogger, I had two mostly nude men at my feet! We're not talking a mistake. *sighs*

Are you a member of Lady Badger's Event's group? She gathers all the local happenings and posts them in one place. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SoCalSMEvents/ I think you'll do a lot better in a real time setting than on one of these sites. I see most everyone I've met in real time on here, so there are a lot of local "real" D/s people on Collarme. (The ones that weren't here before, I drag on for the forums. These forums are some of the best I've found. Even when people disagree it doesn't turn into a flame war. I love that level of maturity!) Go to one of the munches. :-)



lovingmaster45 -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/9/2004 4:16:18 AM)

I just looked at your profile. Here is my assessment. First, you have no pic on your profile. Second, your profile is BLANK...does that mean you are also a blank? Third, you are old ( I am older) and old guys have to put out more effort to demonstrate they are not like all the other old farts all of us come across in our daily lives. I am VERY prejudiced against people my age. (Much the way a middle-class well-educated black male must feel towards ghetto trash black males) Most men my age give other men in our age group a bad image. Fourth you are very overweight; it shows you lack discipline to control yourself; yet you seek to control others?

But mostly; your grammar is horrible. I think I was in the third grade when I learned the difference between your and you're; did you miss that day?

None of my subs would ever reply to a Dom who could not spell and put a proper sentence together.



INSIDEYOURMIND -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/9/2004 5:52:29 AM)

People lie in their profiles because they can.

That being said, I agree with all the information given here.

I fish, if I throw a bare hook out, I ain't gonna catch anything, but if I present the fish with something they like, I will get bites, and if I throw out a bait just right, and in the right spot, I catch a good one.

Take the time and write a clear, well written profile, show that you put a great deal of time and thought into it. Let them know that you are someone they would want to be interested in, and show them a photo, if you are ugly, or out of shape, maybe there is someone out there that likes your kind of ugly or out of shape.

People are going to lie, they do it everyday, they see it on TV, they read it in the newspaper, there are many on this site that do, but more do not.

You say you are looking for a woman to cherish and love forever, it may take a while to find her, I say take the time, and you will. I did, and you read of sucess stories all the time.

As far as the other sites regarding BDSM, and the lifestyle, I have found most of them lacking exactly what this site has, Honesty.

I have attached a link about people and their online lives, its a long read, but well worth reading. I may answer some of your questions.

"Sex in the Digital City" by Nicholas Thompson



Jasmyn -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/9/2004 6:46:51 AM)

MasterLon mentioned enjoying the intelligent thoughts posted on this site but I don't believe he expected to be attacked for his grammar by these same intelligent people?

Loving I do wonder however why you have such a hate for your fellow age group? Wouldn't having ability the to accept that you yourself have aged and so well be enough reason for you NOT to care about the thoughts, actions and shapes of others your age? Or is it that you simply hate being 'older' and find some comfort in blaming others for creating the ageist attitudes people your age face, rather than just accepting an aged age *is* the issue fullstop and you can't do a damn thing about it?

I do smirk at the irony of someone telling someone else they must somehow lack self control in away that implies their lack of self control somehow reflects on the dissenter because they simply fall in the same age demographic. Perhaps you should engage some self control yourself and not let it worry you next time?

------------------


MasterLon when looking for anything online I have largely found profiles can be inadequate and a great time waster Myself, largely one dimensional and do little to reflect the personality behind the nick, including My own at times... but do persevre. Contributing to the forums here is a great way for people to get to know the man behind the nick.

As for your profile and knowing what to write don't despair, take your time, have clear thoughts and purpose within it. And ask around your friends what they think are your qualities, it may suprise you...think how best to put them in writing the leaves the reader wondering, wanting to know more.

It has taken Myself sometime to finally get an online profile I feel reflects Me the Dom and Her needs right now without going into much rhetoric...it garnishes the desired responses now, where in the past My profiles' largely attracted guys seeking sex because I mentioned Fem Domination without succinctly pointing out what that actually would/could entail.

Welcome to the boards and good luck on your search.

I kind of liken what people say on their profiles to a woman getting wolf whistled at.. if the admirer fits the bill of what she wants to attract then the age/weight no problem claim becomes a non issue and isn't a lie..but if the admirer wolf whistling falls outside these preconceived notions of what they want to be admired by they will take the wolf whistle as a non event. Unfortunately, when people say age/weight not an issue they already have a preconceived idea of what their definition of 'acceptable age/weight' is.

Write a profile to be 'admired' and you'll get wolf whistled at ;)

Jasmyn



[image]local://upfiles/14851/8F76A4ED6BAE49408FC9566FA5486310.jpg[/image]



BeachMystress -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/9/2004 8:24:57 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lovingmaster45
Fourth you are very overweight; it shows you lack discipline to control yourself; yet you seek to control others?

But mostly; your grammar is horrible. I think I was in the third grade when I learned the difference between your and you're; did you miss that day?

None of my subs would ever reply to a Dom who could not spell and put a proper sentence together.


When you start bashing someone else's grammar, it is a good idea to check your own. A semicolon is never used to join three sentences.



masterLon3446 -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 5:18:16 AM)

Thank you for your assessment. First I deleted the picture and profile in order to make a better one soon and to upload a better pcture also soon. We all have our opinons of each other I am sure, but I shall not say what I personally think of you, I shall not judge you based on what words were spoken here, Have a good day..

MasterLon



masterLon3446 -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 5:25:00 AM)

BeachMistress, I have read many of your replys to others and respect your thoughts, I am in a realtime BDSM club called Threshold, located in No.Hollywood. I often go to munches and D's discussions. I participate as often as I can in realtime. I am a member of several egroups and post often. I was old school taught and Threshold is a modern BDSM club, We are teaching each other many things, Theshold and myself...Thank you for the link..

MasterLon




masterLon3446 -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 5:34:23 AM)

I wish to personally thank each and everyone here, That has been so nice, As to give me thier opinions. I have read everything and shall keep trying, Again, Thank you....

MasterLon




srahfox -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 6:11:13 AM)

When people want something baddly enough, they will often do anything to get it. Which I believe why there are so many lies and liers out there. There are those who are truthful out there. Everytime the thought crosses my mind... well, no one would know... I slap myself and make the choice to be as honest as I can. I feel it gains nothing to lie, but not everyone sees that. Those who are honest are here, just keep looking.
Grammer. You know what, I know my grammer sucks, but I have always thought (And been told) that I manage to express myself quite well despite that. (Thirteen schools in eleven years will do that to you) I try to keep that in mind when I am reading someone's profile. You can have perfect grammer and spelling and still be an idiot or a jerk.
Age? I've always liked men older than me. (I have no idea how I ended up with a man all of 3 days older than me) Maybe it's the thought of experiance, I have no idea. I told my Master once that if we weren't together and his father wasn't married... I'd definately give him a good hard look. :)
Keep looking. She's out there.



t22tango -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 6:25:51 AM)

I guess I'm the oddball. For me at least, it is easier to be honest here because I'm anon. If I can't be real here, then I can't even be honest with myself. I see that as a problem. I first need to be honest with myself, and then honest to those I interact with.



srahfox -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 7:48:43 AM)

I try to be honest in everything I do, here is nothing different. I can see how some might feel they just want a little something extra in their life, and in order to have it they must lie. Or perhapes they feel someone wouldn't like them if they wrote as themselves. When I wrote my profile I tried list things I thought someone might be turned off by. If they don't like it, don't write me. At least I would know I did my part and was as honest as I could be.



LadyPatrice -> RE: Lies In A Profile (12/10/2004 5:15:35 PM)

Well, you will really appreciate that little gem when you find her, eh? I know I will too:-) This is a wonderful medium, the internet, but it just is not like physical reality. I know you have probably heard this but, you might try going to events, munches etc.

Actually I have met some good friends starting out online but no one to really be mine. Not that special one. I am always hopeful though.

I understand you were discouraged when you wrote this. Maybe you feel better today. I hope you do. Let us know.

Lady Patrice



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