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Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 1:13:13 PM   
Nukldo


Posts: 7
Joined: 2/11/2014
Status: offline 		Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 1:26:41 PM   
ChatteParfaitt


Posts: 6562
Joined: 3/22/2011
From: The t'aint of the Midwest -- Indiana
Status: offline 		You sound like you need to get laid. Hire an escort and practice safe sex.

Then stop watching porn or whatever else it is you're doing to get all worked up. You're in the military right?

So you should be good at self discipline. Practice some.

_____________________________



(in reply to Nukldo)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 2:06:29 PM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline 		That was rather blunt, ChatteParfaitt! Haha

But you are certainly right. Nukldo, this is not addiction - it's desire. Getting yourself worked up over something. You could call it dom frenzy, hormones, working yourself up.

Either way, I recommend finding an outlet. For me, I punch a punching bag till I'm bleeding at the hands and have some sex if I can.

You just need a way to release that coil in your head. Porn, fantasizing, etc all tighten that coil up. Definitely avoid that.

(in reply to ChatteParfaitt)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 2:32:23 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline 		~FR~

So basically, you're saying that you walk around randomly objectifying women who invade your sight-lines and you're wondering if this is healthy or if anyone else does this? Really? This has nothing to do with "being a dom". I think Chatte is right and you've been watching too much porn.

How Do I Stop Objectifying Women?
The Guys' Guide to Seeing Women, Not Objects
How to Stop Inadvertently Objectifying Women
The Harm In Treating Ourselves and Others As Sexual Objects

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to pg4g)
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RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:04:01 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		Uhm, self induced chastity can do that. I face similar problems. You best bet is to find some sort of healthy outlet like the gym. You need coping skills for an unusually high sex drive. Sorry bub! :)

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
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RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:05:50 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

~FR~

So basically, you're saying that you walk around randomly objectifying women who invade your sight-lines and you're wondering if this is healthy or if anyone else does this? Really? This has nothing to do with "being a dom". I think Chatte is right and you've been watching too much porn.

How Do I Stop Objectifying Women?
The Guys' Guide to Seeing Women, Not Objects
How to Stop Inadvertently Objectifying Women
The Harm In Treating Ourselves and Others As Sexual Objects


I thank you for those links, a few of my friends could use them (mostly vanilla).
Let me guess, psych major? (pardon the presumption) :-)

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:06:47 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?


I would be more concerned over getting worked up over random strangers. It would be better to channel all that intensity on one woman who likes it.

Otherwise it's just creepy to be at the freezer section having some dude who is thinking of nipple clamps instead of veggies.

(in reply to Nukldo)
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RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:08:46 PM   
DaddySatyr


Posts: 9381
Joined: 8/29/2011
From: Pittston, Pennsyltucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?



Thoughts are evil and must be controlled (preferably by governments) at all costs.

Don't think this way, anymore.

Wrong-thinking is punishable.

Right-thinking will be just as quickly rewarded.





_____________________________

A Stone in My Shoe

Screen captures (and pissing on shadows) still RULE! Ya feel me?

"For that which I love, I will do horrible things"

(in reply to Nukldo)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:16:20 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1


quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?


I would be more concerned over getting worked up over random strangers. It would be better to channel all that intensity on one woman who likes it.

Otherwise it's just creepy to be at the freezer section having some dude who is thinking of nipple clamps instead of veggies.


Such awesome advice, harder to come into fruition. It's honestly not fun to have a high sex drive, as cute as they make it sound or fun, etc if you don't want to hump every asshole that crosses your path but if he can control his urges through different outlets until he finds his destined one then he'll be fine. (One would hope, I have no idea how men are wired and thank goodness I'm not one) :)

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 2/14/2014 3:18:53 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:25:08 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?



Thoughts are evil and must be controlled (preferably by governments) at all costs.

Don't think this way, anymore.

Wrong-thinking is punishable.

Right-thinking will be just as quickly rewarded.






Oh, settle down.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to DaddySatyr)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:31:35 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Hey OP,

We had a thread like this a good while back.

Now, much as I might give offence to some, I have to admit that I regularly have days where I think bad bad things about women I see randomly.

I'm pretty sure it'll be because I'm horny.

So getting laid may well be the perfect prescription.

Setting aside the paranoid nonsense about government seeking to control our thoughts, it only becomes an issue if you were to find yourself fighting an urge to act out on these thoughts/impulses. That would be fucked up. Governments are pretty ok with people thinking shit, it's when they do shit that things get gnarly.

The only other advice I'd give you, is don't let this shit fuck with your work life. If you're a military officer, I'm imagining you've worked hard to get there, it would be an awful shame if horniness had an impact on your professional behaviour.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to Nukldo)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 3:34:07 PM   
SylvereApLeanan


Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

I thank you for those links, a few of my friends could use them (mostly vanilla).
Let me guess, psych major? (pardon the presumption) :-)


You're welcome. Nope, not a psych major, but I do enjoy the psychological aspect of WIITWD. I also try to be aware of social issues and how the BDSM scene encourages and protects predators by legitimizing things like objectification of random women, and making them seem like a normal part of kink. If your established partner likes objectification and consents to it, that's one thing. When you're doing it to random strangers without their consent, that's creepy.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl
"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:27:42 PM   
Nukldo


Posts: 7
Joined: 2/11/2014
Status: offline 		Not the responce(s) I expected but I appreciate the honest feedback and I am embarrassed. I have taken the advice to heart and have learned a great deal. Thank you.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:34:16 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Hey,

So this is a genuine question...

Can you honestly say that you've never seen someone and wondered what it would feel like if he slipped his cock into you?

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:43:14 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		It's called frenzy. It's pretty common when you're new to this.

It's like a kid being given 20 bucks and told they can have anything they want in the candy store. Obviously they don't think about stomach aches and cavities.

But you are presumably an adult so you should be able to control yourself. Go work out. Volunteer. Do something other than think about your dick.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to crazyml)
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RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:49:00 PM   
crazyml


Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline 		Was that in reply to me or a FR?

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:50:12 PM   
smileforme50


Posts: 1623
Joined: 1/24/2013
From: DelaWHERE(?)
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?


It's times like this that actually make me feel glad that I am overweight.....there's a lot less chance of my being the one being looked at in such a way while I'm in the supermarket.

_____________________________

“Give it to me!” she yelled
“I’m so fucking wet! Give it to me now!”

She could scream all she wanted…..I was keeping the umbrella.

(in reply to Nukldo)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 5:50:45 PM   
TieMeInKnottss


Posts: 1944
Joined: 9/6/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Nukldo

Thanks all for taking a minute to read this. Although I am not completely new to the lifestyle it has been laying dorment within for a few years and I have found this site. My trouble is that like an addiction the Dom that was buried inside me has surfaced with a vengeance. Every where I go I find myself looking differently at women. "How would that ass look with a few well placed welts on it" or "that ass is pretty small my aim would have to be good", or today at the freezer section of the grocery store, "what amazing nipples I wish I had clamps." Even when a was virgin newbe I did not thoughts like this. To top it off, I am a military officer and am being called "sir" all the time which really should not effect me the way it has the last couple days. Anyone else experience anything like this?


First"...I had to laugh about the effect of being called "sir". I have always joked that I would have never made it in the military because I would be in a state of constant arousal with all those men making me call them "sir"

Second..I have a really high sex drive (more like a guy than a woman's) so I understand those thoughts except mine are more along the lines of "oh...my....with arms like that I bet you could throw me down and....." Hey, as long as it stays in my head and I don't TELL the man I am mentally undressing him or objectifying him...than it is NOT crazy!! It is a whole other story if you become the old, crazy man who approaches young woman at the mall and offer to pay their college tuition if they just go in the dressing room with you for a minute!

Last, some of us don't recognize what is "different" or that what we like/want is normal and something that interests others until we are older... When you first realize that it is POSSIBLE, it is the equivalent of the "kid in the candy store"-initially you want to sample everything and gorge yourself. The good thing is, that mature people hopefully have more self-control and ability to see the potential pitfalls...

(in reply to Nukldo)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 6:21:32 PM   
LafayetteLady


Posts: 7683
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Northern New Jersey
Status: offline 		I'm with CrazyML here. We are all guilty of "inappropriate" thoughts at one time or another. If thinking sexual thoughts about someone we find attractive but not acting on them comes down to lack of consent, then everyone on the planet is a criminal.

For a vanilla person, a girl (as crazyml said) might think about how a good looking guys cock might feel. Does she get his consent first? No. Is she "objectifying"the guy? Sure.

A vanila guy might think about a girls lips on his cock or how tight her pussy is. Does he ask her if he can think this about her first? Of course not. Objectifying her? In the literal sense of the ter, yea.

Kinky people think kinky sexual thoughts. It is no more actinging without consent than the above examples. To say the OP is doing so...well it is taking feminism a bit too far.

How about people who when they are alone and decide to masturbate think of some hot person that crossed their path? Should we berate them as well?

Chatte hit the nail on the head here. The OP needs to get laid. Unles and unttil he attempts to act on those thoughts with strangers, he is doing nothing wrong. Of course if his mental fantasies are dtrimental to his daily life, a problem also.

Just one other thought...do all the dommes here with photos honestly believ no guy has pulled up mental pictures of you for their spank bank?

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Healthy Addiction? - 2/14/2014 6:24:21 PM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TieMeInKnottss

First"...I had to laugh about the effect of being called "sir". I have always joked that I would have never made it in the military because I would be in a state of constant arousal with all those men making me call them "sir"


Trust me, it gets old quick. I worked in an office with just male officers all day for the last year. Sir, sir, sir, sir, salute when walking past, sir, sir.

But I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the idea of rank. If I was to get into the D/s side more, I'd probably either want to be treated just as a superior or subordinate military rank. And then the superior fucks the subordinate hehe.

(in reply to TieMeInKnottss)
Profile   Post #: 20
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