Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Submissives & Bondage


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Submissives & Bondage Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 2/28/2014 8:48:16 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pg4g

Well I'm also they guy angry in chains on his knees. Apparently he likes me in my camouflage pants and shirtless once I get home from a deployment. Not all fun and games for me.

Ok well I guess it is. So sue me hehe

Oh yeah, the shirtless with camouflage would do it for me, but soon to be pantless.
No angry guy part. Willing compliance. Maybe a slight protest here and there, once he's spread-eagled.
You do have hand and foot signals, or not?

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 2/28/2014 9:36:57 PM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal


quote:

ORIGINAL: pg4g

Well I'm also they guy angry in chains on his knees. Apparently he likes me in my camouflage pants and shirtless once I get home from a deployment. Not all fun and games for me.

Ok well I guess it is. So sue me hehe

Oh yeah, the shirtless with camouflage would do it for me, but soon to be pantless.
No angry guy part. Willing compliance. Maybe a slight protest here and there, once he's spread-eagled.
You do have hand and foot signals, or not?


I'm generally angry cos I lost the fight or I woke up chained... That and I'm about to be beaten and tasered and then fucked for hours without mercy. So I'm either angry or moody. And generally extremely sarcastic.

What do you mean by hand and foot signals?

< Message edited by pg4g -- 2/28/2014 9:38:24 PM >

_____________________________

Switching: the best of both worlds.

It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. - Rocky Balboa

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 2/28/2014 10:11:51 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pg4g

What do you mean by hand and foot signals?

Oh, I meant safety signals, in place of a safe word.

You know, in case you're gagged.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 2/28/2014 10:19:38 PM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline 		Yeah I got a hand signal for when I'm gagged. Not allowed to use it unless I'm in danger of major injury, others involved or interfering with work. If I use it due to pain or dislike, I just get tortured more.

[Edited for clarification]

< Message edited by pg4g -- 2/28/2014 10:26:15 PM >

_____________________________

Switching: the best of both worlds.

It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. - Rocky Balboa

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/1/2014 5:37:21 AM   
bondman53


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/18/2014
Status: offline 		Most D/s activity is performed for the sub's pleasure. I wouldn't Imagine there are many women, wives, girlfriends, etc who would want a boyfriend who wanted to be tied up and left in the spare room while she sat downstairs watching telly. It's all just games, and mostly for the sub's pleasure. Truly dominant women, i mean the real ones who dominate there partners even if they don't want to be dominated are about as common as unicorns thank god,

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/1/2014 6:52:21 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

Most D/s activity is performed for the sub's pleasure.

Assuming you mean BDSM, not Dominance/submission, none of the men with whom I have had kinky sex would agree with that.

I didn't understand the rest of your post enough to parse it.

(in reply to bondman53)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/1/2014 3:45:17 PM   
sodsta


Posts: 246
Joined: 7/19/2006
From: London, England
Status: offline 		For me it's pretty simple. I like to try and fight back, and if I'm tied up it makes it a lot harder. I like the struggle and the adrenaline. I like feeling helpless when I'm essentially having the crap beaten out of me.

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/1/2014 9:55:34 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		My kid was in the hospital two months ago. She wasn't allowed to eat solid food but was fed via an IV.

Although she got all necessary nutrients through the IV she still enjoys eating. She enjoys the taste, the feeling of fullness.

Why isn't it redundant to eat when you get get the nutrients in another way? Because it just feels better.

Same with bondage. It just feels good. I don't lie there bound thinking about how submissive I am. I just get incredibly turned on.

I don't even view it as a d/s activity. To me, putting the bag of Brussel Sprouts back on the shelf at the grocery store when he told me to is a lot more submissive. Getting tied up and turned on is just fun.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/2/2014 7:55:24 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

I don't even view it as a d/s activity. To me, putting the bag of Brussel Sprouts back on the shelf at the grocery store when he told me to is a lot more submissive. Getting tied up and turned on is just fun.


Amen to all of the above!

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/2/2014 8:16:41 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		I think the op, like a lot of people who do s & m, has the mistaken idea that bondage is just a precursor to s & m.

It isn't. It's a full fetish just by itself. We don't do s & m, barring light spanking and such. Bondage for us is what s & m is for the op. And the only think it's a precursor to is hot sex.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/2/2014 9:58:42 PM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline 		I suppose I just thought about people tying the other up and having sex with them, and if the person is submissive anyway, wanting to do whatever the dominant person wanted, then it seemed somewhat redundant.

But I of all people should know that it isn't just tied into S&M. I restrain my partner, and I don't hurt him. He's not a masochist, and if I did hurt him, he'd leave me. My restraining him is actually about him showing he trusts me NOT to hurt him despite the vulnerable position he's in.

And I didn't even think of the fetish of bondage itself! What was going wrong with my mind when I posted this?



_____________________________

Switching: the best of both worlds.

It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. - Rocky Balboa

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/2/2014 10:40:06 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pg4g

I suppose I just thought about people tying the other up and having sex with them, and if the person is submissive anyway, wanting to do whatever the dominant person wanted, then it seemed somewhat redundant.

But I of all people should know that it isn't just tied into S&M. I restrain my partner, and I don't hurt him. He's not a masochist, and if I did hurt him, he'd leave me. My restraining him is actually about him showing he trusts me NOT to hurt him despite the vulnerable position he's in.

And I didn't even think of the fetish of bondage itself! What was going wrong with my mind when I posted this?


Nothing wrong with wanting to know what other people get out of it. I wonder this myself at times. For instance, I get offers of "free" service subbing left and right, no strings attached. Right. (Even if so, I can't accept those kinds of lopsided offers.) Invariably, after I've turned them down - mainly male subs but occasionally a bisexual female sub will offer maid service - they will drop the hint that they REALLY LIKE BONDAGE. I'm thinking to myself WTF?

I can see bondage being a fetish with subs, and the Dominants who get into rope-typing artistry (I don't have the patience for that sort of artistic self-expression! I want to get to the sex acts. ) I view bondage for utilitarian purposes or else incorporated into BDSM not for its own sake, as more of a kink (for me) rather than a fetish. That's why I avoid fetishy bondage-type male subs because I don't consider we have compatible kinks in this regard. Am I making any sense to you, pg4g? In other words, I'm only interested in the restraint aspect of it, not confinement or keeping my partner bound for any considerable duration. This is also why I have no interest in plastic wrap, skintight rubber wear, strait jackets, and I find hood-wearing creepy as well as using pantyhose as a head covering.

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I think the op, like a lot of people who do s & m, has the mistaken idea that bondage is just a precursor to s & m.

It isn't. It's a full fetish just by itself. We don't do s & m, barring light spanking and such. Bondage for us is what s & m is for the op. And the only think it's a precursor to is hot sex.

No question that bondage is separate from S&M. I don't do S&M either, and don't count spanking, hair pulling (more like grasping, not done hard), man-handling, light swats or a slap in the face (if sub gets into that) as being sado-masochistic. Not into inflicting pain nor immobilization--I want to keep things interactively erotic.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/3/2014 12:11:19 AM   
pg4g


Posts: 296
Joined: 12/31/2013
From: Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal
I can see bondage being a fetish with subs, and the Dominants who get into rope-typing artistry (I don't have the patience for that sort of artistic self-expression! I want to get to the sex acts. ) I view bondage for utilitarian purposes or else incorporated into BDSM not for its own sake, as more of a kink (for me) rather than a fetish. That's why I avoid fetishy bondage-type male subs because I don't consider we have compatible kinks in this regard. Am I making any sense to you, pg4g? In other words, I'm only interested in the restraint aspect of it, not confinement or keeping my partner bound for any considerable duration. This is also why I have no interest in plastic wrap, skintight rubber wear, strait jackets, and I find hood-wearing creepy as well as using pantyhose as a head covering.


I agree. I'm not into just tying up for confinement's sake, and plastic wrap, straight jackets etc do nothing for me. You and I do seem somewhat aligned in that way. Restraints are there not for the restraints, but for the man/woman held inside those restraints. It's a means to an end - control.

_____________________________

Switching: the best of both worlds.

It ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. - Rocky Balboa

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/3/2014 2:48:47 PM   
mummyman321


Posts: 2102
Joined: 10/31/2005
From: Dusseldorf
Status: offline 		I met a Domme once who loved to beat on a man with no bondage. She wanted to see how much he could take before his body would give in. I can say I really hated that experience. I love the bondage aspect. I am a submissive and I give my submission willingly. But I do like to be able to struggle when being beat on/teased. It allows me to exert all my energies into the play. I do not hold back. This does several things for me and my Domme. The fact I can brace during in impact allows me to be able to take a much harder hit and more of them. It also allows my Domme to use more of her energy. She can let the flogger or paddle fly with all her might. So it lets us both not to holdback and to fully get into the scene.

There is also a very mental aspect of bondage. While I do give my submission willingly, the knowledge that I really do not have a choice in the matter while I am bound is an incredible turn for both of us. I may not want to say no, but having that choice detracts from the scene. Having that choice taken away allows me to go into sub space so much deeper. And for my Domme it is an incredible turn on knowing she is free to do want she wants and I could not stop her even if I wanted to. Complete physical and mental power exchange. It is a wonderful thing.

_____________________________

Life - Its not about where you are but about the journey to get there - I prefer to choose the road less traveled

(in reply to pg4g)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Submissives & Bondage - 3/4/2014 10:30:51 AM   
ClassAct2006


Posts: 318
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline 		I don't think any dominant boyfriend I've ever had would agree everything was for my pleasure. I suppose they would probably say they do not want to do it with someone who is not submissive and hates it all which is slightly different, but I have never felt I controlled what went on or gave a shopping list of what I require in any sense at all.

If the dom wants to use bondage then he can. I don't want to say what's allowed or not allowed as long as I'm not damaged.


quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

Most D/s activity is performed for the sub's pleasure.

Assuming you mean BDSM, not Dominance/submission, none of the men with whom I have had kinky sex would agree with that.

I didn't understand the rest of your post enough to parse it.


(in reply to kalikshama)
Profile   Post #: 55
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Submissives & Bondage Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094