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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/12/2014 8:47:26 PM   
NiceButMeanGirl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Hahahaha.... And My post stood.

With this in mind, I'll be really nice. I never saw cuckolding as being about the men. It was about Me being a woman. It was all about expressing (or not) My own sexuality. THAT was a power trip.

Bulls? They aren't the one in control. I never saw it that way.


Right. I think with cuckolding, it's the woman in charge. In charge of her sexuality, in charge of the cuckold's sexuality and, yes, in charge of the bull's sexuality because it's HER that says whether she will have sex with the bull or not. For that matter, she might not even have sex with a bull at all and just let the cuck THINK she is. lol

NBMG


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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 10:22:12 AM   
UllrsIshtar


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I never saw cuckolding as being about the men. It was about Me being a woman.



Interestingly enough, even if you reverse the gender roles, this often still stands. (Not ALWAYS obviously, groups of people never fit into an ALWAYS.)

I have a cuck streak in me. I'd love for my husband to do that type of play with me but... it's all about me and the other woman.
The fact that he's there, getting fucked, whether or not even dominant in bed with the other woman, is sorta circumstantial to mine and her desires.

I know several other female cuck couples/situations where the same thing applies.

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 10:29:04 AM   
GoddessManko


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I've been a cuckholdress. Come here.... Let Me tell you a secret.

I'm fucking in charge. Of My sexuality.... Of yours....

Call yourself the 'big bad bull'. Might want to get yourself in check.




HOT

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 10:29:56 AM   
Lucylastic


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damn, I just had to call my pet over this
"I'm fucking in charge. Of My sexuality.... Of yours.... "

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 11:32:31 AM   
LadyPact


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NBMG, you really did hit the nail on the head, at least with the way I used to do things. I'm not big on casual sex by a long shot, so I worked with the psychological aspect. (Which, btw, is an incredible turn on.) It can be a really powerful thing *if* the person in charge takes control of it all and does things the way they want. This is also why I say I'm not suited for at least 99% of those who say they want to be cucks. For a lot of folks, it's about voyeurism/exhibitionism and that's not always My angle. I prefer that pinch of emotional sadism.

Manko, I think you'd really enjoy a past thread that we had on the subject. It's in the General forum by author Rochesub. There's some awesome stuff in there.

Lucy, I'm glad I was of assistance.


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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 2:17:58 PM   
FieryOpal


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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Manko, I think you'd really enjoy a past thread that we had on the subject. It's in the General forum by author Rochesub.


This might be the one you're referring to, LadyPact, by Rochsub2009 "A serious discussion about cuckolding" http://www.collarchat.com/m_4051501/mpage_1/tm.htm

What I gathered from this (aside from the UllrsIshtar's Cuckqueaning dynamic), is there are two types of F/m cuckolding. Emotional-psychological sadism or mental cruelty, where the cuckolded male partner - customarily the husband - does not actively participate in a threesome/3-way with his Cuckoldress-wife and the bull.

In traditional, if there is such a thing, cuckolding or the kind depicted in FemDom porn, all 3 parties are present together and there are elements of "forced" bi. Often the husband or male partner is latently bisexual in this scenario.

Btw, it isn't unusual for the cuckolded male to also be a chastity slave, where his Cuckoldress keeps him in chastity as a further aspect of "Mental Torment."

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/13/2014 11:57:19 PM   
Daeson


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Maybe as just another straight male dom, but the sound of this situation sounds..well what's the point?

By that I mean, why go thought all of that[ legal,religious,and spiritual] leg work for something that requires none of that. It seems odd to lock two people into a relationship that deep over the idea of the man being [and I'm well aware this is dipping into the wank bank fantasy] in some emotional debt.If its you're thing, hey, awesome enjoy it, just don't throw your self down a hole over something you got off to one time.

Perhaps you should give being a live in chastity boi for a while [work>pleasure] and see if that gives you a feeling of fulfillment.

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 3:18:20 PM   
AlphaFemsRule


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IMO: the Alpha / beta dichotomy is just another form of human interaction that has been sexualized (which is what most of this sub-culture is). In other words: a fetish.

In that respect, it has as much realistic, long-term viability as any other fetish (read: none) Once you put it in the context of everyday life, you realize nobody can uphold that fantasy 24/7, whether you're a bull, cuck, hotwife or whatever. It's just not going to happen.

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 3:34:21 PM   
ExiledTyrant


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlphaFemsRule

IMO: the Alpha / beta dichotomy is just another form of human interaction that has been sexualized (which is what most of this sub-culture is). In other words: a fetish.

In that respect, it has as much realistic, long-term viability as any other fetish (read: none) Once you put it in the context of everyday life, you realize nobody can uphold that fantasy 24/7, whether you're a bull, cuck, hotwife or whatever. It's just not going to happen.


I had a lovely chat today with another poster and the Alpha, Beta, and Omega thing was the crux of a long conversation. I used wolves as the analogy, because no matter how civilized we think we have become, we're still animals. That said, I disagree with you about it being a fetish.

Jus sayin
Exiled

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 3:53:29 PM   
AlphaFemsRule


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quote:



I had a lovely chat today with another poster and the Alpha, Beta, and Omega thing was the crux of a long conversation. I used wolves as the analogy, because no matter how civilized we think we have become, we're still animals. That said, I disagree with you about it being a fetish.

Jus sayin
Exiled


Clearly I think such roles exist in human society (just look at my username) and I've written quite a bit myself about animalistic sexuality. But I don't think human relationships perfectly mirror the social structure of wolves or many other animal societies which is what people seem to believe. They do insofar as there are leaders and followers, but that's it. The traits that

Besides, my main point was in reference to OP about the viability of real life, long term relationships fundamentally based on Alpha / beta roles. Not whether those roles exist in the first place.


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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 4:01:50 PM   
ExiledTyrant


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I will buy in that "many" do not, and mirroring the species would be ridiculous, we have choice's and they are enslaved to primal instinct. On a primal level, I see Alpha's, Beta's, and Omega's among our species, functioning much like a wolf pack. As it turns out, the Omega's tend to bleat the loudest about what an Alpha is, or more vehemently, what an Alpha is not, until the Alpha snaps back.

Jus sayin
Exiled

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 4:10:17 PM   
UllrsIshtar


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Just FYI, but the whole Alpha/Beta/Omega structure when it comes to wolves has been disproven for over 40 years. Wolf researchers have been trying to dispel the myth of the Alpha wolf, and it's use as an example for human rank competitions for decades now.

Wolves in the wild live in nuclear families with the breeding couple being at the top of the rank, and lower rankings going in birth order. At the point of sexual maturity, lower ranking (offspring) members go off and start their own breeding couple, thereby automatically becoming the 'Alpha' pair.

The only time you see wolves actual competing for hierarchal status is when they are kept in captivity and artificially forced to live in non-nuclear groups. Otherwise competition for social rank is foreign to these animals, and every single wolf will be both Alpha, Beta and Omega in its lifetime, strictly based on its age.


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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 4:22:42 PM   
ExiledTyrant


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quote:

ORIGINAL: UllrsIshtar

Just FYI, but the whole Alpha/Beta/Omega structure when it comes to wolves has been disproven for over 40 years. Wolf researchers have been trying to dispel the myth of the Alpha wolf, and it's use as an example for human rank competitions for decades now.



I have proof you're full of crap. They say a pic is worth a thousand words, so BEHOLD UNBELIEVER and be edumacated in wolf pack hierarchy!





Attachment (1)

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 5:10:05 PM   
AlphaFemsRule


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Apologies in advance if I'm wrong - but I think you're likely a troll (or at least have strong tendencies in that regard), so I'm not going to spend much time dismantling your statements and forming a rebuttal.

However, I will say that the primary problem with what you're saying is that human nature, behavior and environments are far too varied to create any kind of consistent criteria in which someone can be quantified as an Alpha (or beta, omega, etc...). Yes, you can abstract those terms out to be inclusive of a wide range of personality characteristics (confident, driven, intelligent and so on), but that's as far as it goes. You can literally take someone who is an undisputed 'Alpha' in one situation and within 24 hours run them through the full spectrum of social strata simply by changing their environment and what's valued therein.

Example: illiterate NFL player is an Alpha on field and an Omega in the classroom. Or executive Alpha in the boardroom who is a beta in his acting class.

I've known super manly homosexual marines who could probably beat the fuck out of 99% of the men out there, but they aren't Alpha anything in heterosexual social spheres because they don't care about women (in that way) in the first place. Human nature is just too broad to be categorized like this.



< Message edited by AlphaFemsRule -- 3/15/2014 5:11:09 PM >

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 5:21:46 PM   
ExiledTyrant


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AlphaFemsRule

Apologies in advance if I'm wrong - but I think you're likely a troll (or at least have strong tendencies in that regard), so I'm not going to spend much time dismantling your statements and forming a rebuttal.


You honor me /sir, I find it quite a compliment being cast in the same light as the mighty Troll!

quote:


However, I will say that the primary problem with what you're saying is that human nature, behavior and environments are far too varied to create any kind of consistent criteria in which someone can be quantified as an Alpha (or beta, omega, etc...). Yes, you can abstract those terms out to be inclusive of a wide range of personality characteristics (confident, driven, intelligent and so on), but that's as far as it goes. You can literally take someone who is an undisputed 'Alpha' in one situation and within 24 hours run them through the full spectrum of social strata simply by changing their environment and what's valued therein.

Example: illiterate NFL player is an Alpha on field and an Omega in the classroom. Or executive Alpha in the boardroom who is a beta in his acting class.

I've known super manly homosexual marines who could probably beat the fuck out of 99% of the men out there, but they aren't Alpha anything in heterosexual social spheres because they don't care about women (in that way) in the first place. Human nature is just too broad to be categorized like this.


However, I will say the the primary problem with what you're saying is that you want to inundate it with scenario's, circumstances, and/or verbiage to find a niche you're comfortable with. It is what it is, you're Alpha, or you're not.

Jus sayin
Exiled

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 9:02:54 PM   
PeonForHer


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FR

As far as I've seen there's been far, far too strong a tendency for humans to 'read' things from nature in a woefully misconceived way. They'll project whatever qualities onto nature, end up convincing themselves that these are 'objective' qualities . . . then take the third step by holding that we should all learn from said objective qualities by a) picking out how humans compare and/or b) striving to emulate these qualities. To put it in brief: it's a balls up, on top of a balls up, on top of a balls up.

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/15/2014 9:11:46 PM   
ExiledTyrant


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

FR

As far as I've seen there's been far, far too strong a tendency for humans to 'read' things from nature in a woefully misconceived way. They'll project whatever qualities onto nature, end up convincing themselves that these are 'objective' qualities . . . then take the third step by holding that we should all learn from said objective qualities by a) picking out how humans compare and/or b) striving to emulate these qualities. To put it in brief: it's a balls up, on top of a balls up, on top of a balls up.


That's because we'd rather live in denial rather than admit we are more virus like than animal like.

Jus sayin
Exiled

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/16/2014 6:17:33 PM   
LookieNoNookie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NiceButMeanGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Hahahaha.... And My post stood.

With this in mind, I'll be really nice. I never saw cuckolding as being about the men. It was about Me being a woman. It was all about expressing (or not) My own sexuality. THAT was a power trip.

Bulls? They aren't the one in control. I never saw it that way.


Right. I think with cuckolding, it's the woman in charge. In charge of her sexuality, in charge of the cuckold's sexuality and, yes, in charge of the bull's sexuality because it's HER that says whether she will have sex with the bull or not. For that matter, she might not even have sex with a bull at all and just let the cuck THINK she is. lol

NBMG



(Since when have men EVER been in charge of sex?)

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/16/2014 8:45:38 PM   
Darkcast


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quote:

ORIGINAL: AthenaSurrenders

I want sexual intimacy with my husband, so if I didn't see him in a sexual way, I never would have married him. That would still be true if he was awesome in every other respect, and if I could have all the sex I wanted elsewhere. Sex is an important part of my intimate relationships.

Besides, the guys who lament the 'friend zone' don't want to be placed there permanently by having a no-sex marriage. They don't WANT a platonic relationship with her, otherwise just being friends would be fine. They want to be in her pants. Why would they get into an arrangement which guaranteed both that they were never going to get what they want, and that they are never going to be able to move on?

From the woman's point of view, the only problem with the friend zone is the implication that she somehow owes a man sex because he's been nice to her. Having male friends is great. It's not a problem at all. Finding out those male friends are upset about being 'friendzoned' is hurtful, because they're essentially saying that I have no value as a friend, only as a potential sexual partner and our friendship has been a ruse.

So yeh. Great for your friends but not something I can imagine catching on.


I have to disagree with your comments about guys that lament the "friend zone." Not every guy that gets upset about being "friendzoned" sees the woman as a potential sexual partner. And thinking that is ridiculous.

From a guy's point of view on the friendzone. Sometimes we really, honestly, believe, that the our friend is actually the one. And some of us just want one chance, that first date. If that spark turns out not to be there, fine at least we got the chance. If it leads to the woman realizing that the guy is maybe the one and thus it goes to a relationship that's more than friends that's also fine. We just want the chance.

I'll throw a perfect example from my own life experience. I've had a crush on my best friend for the past 7 years (i met her 9 years ago in high school). Slowly over those first 2 years i've realized just how much we have in common, how much we're compatible together, how we can fight over stupid shit and just make up afterwards like it was nothing, how we're a perfect match.

She's been there for me for my relationships, when i was feeling down, dumped, or just angry and she's listened. And I've been there for her through her ups and downs, watched her date douchebag after douchebag after douchebag, after crazy guy, after suicidal guy, after douchebag, and just sat in the backfield. I was there for her just to listen to her problems. If she was having relationship issues I was there just to listen. And for years she talks about how she always ends up dating the crazy ones, the liars, the abusers, the cheaters and how she can't find someone that's "normal"


I've tried to get just one date with her, one chance for a romantic evening with her but me and her have this weird thing going where we never both seem to be single at the same time.

Finally the opportunity happened. but when it came up it just seemed to get brushed off. I ended up doing the only thing I could think of doing to get my chance. I confessed my feelings for her. I told her I love her as more than a friend and all I wanted was one chance, one date. And I WAS NOT just saying that because in reality, it's true. I love her and honestly think she's the one. We're just compatible in every single way and just seeing her even for a brief second brings a smile to my face and makes my day. Heck I graduated High School a year before she did and would wake up in the morning and give her a ride to school just to see her for those brief 10 minutes.

Why am I telling you guys all this? Because I'm trying to show my feelings for her. And I wish u could all see how I am around her because it's a lot easier to see my feelings than for me to put it into words.

Anyway, after I told her I got the one response I dreaded. "I don't want to date you because I don't want it to ruin our friendship". Ok yes I've seen relationships where 2 friends start dating, it goes horribly wrong, and they're not friends anymore. But just because a relationship doesn't work out doesn't mean that 2 people still can't be friends. I've seen it, hell I've been in one with a childhood friend and me and her are still just as close today as we were before we started dating. And if I didn't truly love her I wouldn't be willing to put it all on the line because I wouldn't want to lose my best friend. But damnit I truly think she's the one. And even if it didn't work, I've never been an ass about a breakup and am still friends with most one my exes (....well all but 1 but that's a different story to tell where what she did was unforgivable)

And in the end, not only was I told she would never date me, I didn't even get that one chance.

Anyway, back to where this post started, Why am I telling you guys all of this? Because not every single guy that hates the friendzone wants to just get into a girls pants. Me, and I'm sure other guys out there, hate it because we'll never get that one chance to show we can be more than a friend. That we can be the one.

/EndRant

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RE: Cuckolding, as a solution to the Friendzone - 3/16/2014 10:36:59 PM   
stef


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkcast

From a guy's point of view on the friendzone. Sometimes we really, honestly, believe, that the our friend is actually the one.

You can really, honestly believe whatever the hell you want. It doesn't change a thing. If she doesn't feel it too, you're not entitled to a chance to "prove her wrong". Get over it.

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