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RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 2:09:39 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		Thanks so much for telling Me what I'm allowed to do and not. I was confused. But now you've set Me straight. I can't thank you enough. Have a nice day

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 2:15:22 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

Thanks so much for telling Me what I'm allowed to do and not. I was confused. But now you've set Me straight. I can't thank you enough. Have a nice day


And i thank You for setting me straight on what is expected in this life. i can't believe that i actually questioned You on this. Good luck in Your search for someone to complete Your life. i'm sure whomever You choose will be an incredibly lucky gal.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 4:18:34 PM   
quizzicalkitten


Posts: 312
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

Well, simply, I'm old school. I was raised and vetted into this Life long before the internet. I believe there is only a few "right ways" and a great many "wrong ways". I witness "wrong ways" in practice all the time. It truly makes Me cringe. I believe in the discipline of mind it takes to properly lead. I believe there's many things that "should be" but aren't because of the deterioration of protocol and the more prevailing free for all attitude. Be that as it may. I can only live this Life the way I know to be correct. As I'm only ultimately responsible for Me and Mine


Define "old school" please. And please also define the term "vetted" as it relates to this "Life".

Honestly, I'm not trying to be disrespectful....I'm just trying to understand where the mindset is coming from.



Read Wanker that thinks hes godly because he caps himself.

I know of no one who was in the lifestyle before the internet who use a capping protocol, and Ive met a fair number of people within my community and others. I know several people who would giggle at the above saying it denotes anything other then ego and feeling better about ones self and they are slaves who started in this life in the 60s.

Also Littleladybug, try reading to love to serve to obey by Mama Vi (Vi Johnson), and Herstory http://www.leatherlibrary.org/HERSTORY.pdf

Both are great personal accounts of what it was like in leather and bdsm back in the days of old (many moons before I was born)

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 6:35:11 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		ya'all are right. I'm an idiot and ya'all know so much more than I. Have a great day and go fuck yourself. Thanks so much an enjoyable and enlightening time

(in reply to quizzicalkitten)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 6:36:12 PM   
quizzicalkitten


Posts: 312
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

ya'all are right. I'm an idiot and ya'all know so much more than I. Have a great day and go fuck yourself. Thanks so much an enjoyable and enlightening time



Putty tat, it was clear you werent that bright from reading your profile....

Dont Claim shit, when your lieing, its REALLY easy to discredit.....

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 6:41:21 PM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		Personally, I have no problem with s-types using initial caps when addressing me or with signing their names in lowercase.
Initially, I was slightly put off by the use of lowercase letters, such as "i" instead of "I" because good grammar was always instilled in me.
(It bothers me when people do this in their text messages instead of taking time to shift back & forth between capital letters.)
I tend to use slashy-speak when differentiating between Dominants, s-types, and S/switches (Top-leaning or bottom-leaning, if known). I tend not to do this when speaking (writing) about ownership with repetitive words (only with the term O/p-Owner/property), nor with pronouns.
I do not, however, refer to myself in pronoun use with initial caps (Me, Myself, W/we, U/us). Call it OCD or whatever, but I prefer to follow standard (proper) English usage.

My last sub used uppercase/lowercase protocol when writing & texting me. When I had asked him about this practice of his, he told me it showed his deference to me.
He did not sign his name with a lowercase letter, though.
I became accustomed to this with him and grew to like it. Nonetheless, I would never insist upon this with another sub.

Now, when replying to messages, at first I did follow written vanilla etiquette in using an initial cap for all proper names.
Then I realized I should address a person how s/he wishes to be addressed, no different than if I only knew their user name.
The way I saw it, no submissive is automatically in a D/s dynamic with me. We are peers.
If a Dom is switching (in reverse to what I was doing) this on you without your consent, what does that tell you?
First, that he is most likely an 4sshat Dom. Second, chances are he will not honor consent with you or any other submissive in whatever capacity.
So yes, I would see that as a red flag. If he impressed you otherwise, then I would send him a message stating in no uncertain terms that you would prefer to be addressed as you have indicated ("You might not have known this, but not all subs/slaves prefer to use all lowercase letters when referring to themselves...), then wait to see how he reacts to this. If he doesn't apologize for the oversight, then I would advise dropping him like a hot potato.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to HeartAndSoul31)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 7:46:32 PM   
SeekingTrinity


Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

ya'all are right. I'm an idiot and ya'all know so much more than I. Have a great day and go fuck yourself. Thanks so much an enjoyable and enlightening time


It's never as much fun to go fuck oneself. Or is that Oneself? Perhaps O/oneself will cover all bases effectively? It truly is so much more enjoyable when someone else is doing the fucking for you. Or is that You? Since we're establishing proper fuck protocol and all. Or is that We're? W/we're?

After all, YOU are the resident expert on capitalization and lower case lettering depending on who is being spoken to


As an aside, I think you guys broke him
Another aside, I find it sad that someone resorts to throwing a fit when folks disagree with them or call them on what they say. Case in point...the quote Ive quoted

< Message edited by SeekingTrinity -- 8/20/2014 8:02:02 PM >

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 8:34:08 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		LOL. No fit is thrown. I just don't see the point of continuing. It's falling on deaf ears that obviously believe they know more than anyone else. In what I like to call the subbie kingdom. It really doesn't make that much difference to Me what anyone else thinks or thinks they know. We've all learned what we've learned and all those things are just what's true for the individual. DesFIP comes from the position of what she learned from the East Coast and her parents friends. My learning comes from the West Coast. Which one's right and which one's wrong? Neither really. Since we've all learned this from different sources and perspectives. So littleladybug doesn't like what I have to say in My profile. Bully for her. I would never contact or consider her in the first place. She's just not My type. There's really not much else to say on the subject except My apologies to the OP for the hijacking of her thread

(in reply to SeekingTrinity)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 8:45:11 PM   
PandoraFoxxx


Posts: 182
Joined: 1/3/2011
From: San Mateo, CA
Status: offline 		Did not you yourself state you knew more than most (being that you came before the internet/ are a bit of a one true way-er?) No offense, babe, but turnabout is fair play. Let's all be good sports twisty-panties *chuckles*

Now, to throw in my 2c being that this is the internet and all that - strangers abound - I have personally found it is a good rule of thumb to approach everyone as a human being first, s/D/Switch-type later. After the whole hey, how ya doin phase. I think there are a great many people - more dominants in my personal experience, but some subs as well - who do not lead with their human side. I liken it to approaching a potential employee during the interview process and leading with I AM YOUR BOSS!! *doom sounds* Vs. Hi there! It's nice to meet you *smile* Tell me about yourself and why you have interest in working for me/this company.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 8:56:53 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		No. I wasn't meaning to state I somehow knew more. Nor was I meaning to imply it. Just giving a bit of background and explaining the reason for My position. Still, it's neither here nor there and the points are obviously moot

(in reply to PandoraFoxxx)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:10:14 PM   
quizzicalkitten


Posts: 312
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

LOL. No fit is thrown. I just don't see the point of continuing. It's falling on deaf ears that obviously believe they know more than anyone else. In what I like to call the subbie kingdom. It really doesn't make that much difference to Me what anyone else thinks or thinks they know. We've all learned what we've learned and all those things are just what's true for the individual. DesFIP comes from the position of what she learned from the East Coast and her parents friends. My learning comes from the West Coast. Which one's right and which one's wrong? Neither really. Since we've all learned this from different sources and perspectives. So littleladybug doesn't like what I have to say in My profile. Bully for her. I would never contact or consider her in the first place. She's just not My type. There's really not much else to say on the subject except My apologies to the OP for the hijacking of her thread



Sorry putty tat, I'm the One who doesnt like your profile. And you with your cap protocol got it wrong. Im a dominant. You can easily tell it by my Rawring really loudly...

Wait you cant because I dont Rawr and go look at me Im domly dom of the realm of all dominates....


You said this was like this before the internet... It wasnt, cap protocol started in IRC and aol chatrooms about 15/20 or so years ago, by men with tiny tiny penises who needed to be capped to feel better about themselves...(Direct quote from one of the dozen people I mention below)

In real life there is no capping protocol, I can call up a few DOZEN people who are from all over the country, and several all over the world who were doing this while you were in diapers and theyd say the same thing.

Instead of being a jerk, say your sorry for your fuck up, own your shit, and move on from it. The only reason why we (read I, Im making an assumption about the others here) are still playing with you is because your a mouse thats still squeaking, and as much as my mother has tried to smack it out of me, I still play with my food....

< Message edited by quizzicalkitten -- 8/20/2014 9:12:23 PM >

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:14:39 PM   
SeekingTrinity


Posts: 1834
Joined: 5/29/2012
From: The 'burbs of Portland, OR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

LOL. No fit is thrown. I just don't see the point of continuing. It's falling on deaf ears that obviously believe they know more than anyone else. In what I like to call the subbie kingdom. It really doesn't make that much difference to Me what anyone else thinks or thinks they know. We've all learned what we've learned and all those things are just what's true for the individual. DesFIP comes from the position of what she learned from the East Coast and her parents friends. My learning comes from the West Coast. Which one's right and which one's wrong? Neither really. Since we've all learned this from different sources and perspectives. So littleladybug doesn't like what I have to say in My profile. Bully for her. I would never contact or consider her in the first place. She's just not My type. There's really not much else to say on the subject except My apologies to the OP for the hijacking of her thread


So telling people to go fuck themselves because they don't agree with you isn't throwing a fit? That's how grown folks handle business? If that's the case, Im doing it wrong then because I find it being offensive to tell people to go fuck themselves. But that's just me of course. People disagree with me all the time. No need for me to be a dick about it if and when they do.

You came off as believing you know more than other folks, you know. You told OP that what she was annoyed with was just part of establishing protocol in BDSM. That might be how you do it, but other folks like myself don't feel the lack of capitalization when someone types any sort of pronoun referring to me diminishes my dominance if that is how Im interacting with a submissive type.

And no, this capitalization/lower case online stuff is not a west coast thing. I've lived here my whole life save for two and a half years spent living in Texas. It's not a west coast thing. It's an online thing pure and simple. Living this stuff in reality will prove that capitalization/lower case doesn't establish squat.

< Message edited by SeekingTrinity -- 8/20/2014 9:57:24 PM >

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:22:57 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

No. I wasn't meaning to state I somehow knew more.


How cute. Shall we review the tape?

quote:

Well presumptuous or not. All it is, is establishing simple protocol. you identify as submissive. Therefore you're lower cased. Just as a dominant is upper cased. It's just a simple establishment of place. It's not meant offensively. This is a BDSM website after all. Where dominance and submission should be established from the git go. Don't like that? Perhaps BDSM and the protocols that go with it isn't right for you


Pretty much sounds like you said that if you do not like the protocols within the framework of BDSM that people shouldn't be into BDSM. Sounds like you not only said that your way was not only correct, but others should reconsider the lifestyle if they disagree. Let me give you a hint... lean close to the monitor so you can hear me whisper... I don't follow your fucking protocols, nor do I observe anything as trite as capitalization to infer my dominance.

Now, go ahead and suggest that I shouldn't be in the lifestyle. I fucking double dog dare you.

You opened this can of worms for yourself and now seem to not like that people have taken an opposite viewpoint. You have been presented with information about why some protocols were established and followed fairly strictly, they made perfect sense. My set of rules do not apply to you, nor should they. My way is not the one twue way, but the way that works for me and my slut. Frankly, I do not care whether anyone else approves of my methods or not, but I am certainly humble enough to know that what might be to my liking would appall someone else.

You are merely one of many who have stated that their observation of some things is the way to do it and any other way is wrong. You certainly will not be the last one to do so either. The fact that we are on a BDSM website already establishes the kinky side, how we manage our profiles further defines what we identify ourselves as being whether dominant, submissive, switch, top, bottom and so on. People that like the capitalization thing don't bother me in the least, I don't care for it myself because I think it is silly, but if it is important to them then I respect their desires. My slut did the capitalization thing with me once. I asked her to stop because with me, it was not what I was interested in seeing from her. Believe this or not, it mattered more to me to find out if we had something in common that would warrant further investigation and possible relationship.

You made a mistake. Flailing around at people afterward and backpedaling is kind of ridiculous when, by your first post in this thread, we all know that it happened. No one is asking you to apologize for making the mistake, what they are saying is that if the protocol matters to you, that is fine, what matters to them is important to them and not necessarily for you or in need of your approval.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:36:35 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		No. The only mistake I made was posting to this thread in the first place. What I think of all you is really irrelevant. But I will say it's not good. So let's leave it at that and I'll go My way while you all go yours. Thanks. See ya

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:45:09 PM   
Gauge


Posts: 5689
Joined: 6/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

No. The only mistake I made was posting to this thread in the first place.


Well, you got one thing right.

quote:

What I think of all you is really irrelevant.


Well OK, two things right.

quote:

But I will say it's not good.


I will toss and turn all night.

quote:

So let's leave it at that and I'll go My way while you all go yours. Thanks. See ya


You won't stay away. I bet you anything.

Look, just admit the mistake you made and all will be forgotten, and maybe laughed at sometime down the road. Adding to a colossal blunder is bad form.

_____________________________

"For there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men." Herman Melville - Moby Dick

I'm wearing my chicken suit and humming La Marseillaise.

(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 9:58:37 PM   
MistressDarkArt


Posts: 5178
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

<snip> I witness "wrong ways" in practice all the time. It truly makes Me cringe. <snip>


What makes me cringe are anonymous folks casually chatting on a board capitalizing 'Me' in the middle of a sentence. This is a written medium; proper grammar, syntax, spelling and punctuation are notably appreciated. I assume English is your first language.

I'm a dominant who received my education on the west coast as well, so what's your excuse?

Welcome to the boards. There is a wealth of knowledge, comradery and good will given freely here when one approaches with their heart, instead of their ego.

Best of luck in your endeavors.




(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/20/2014 11:46:25 PM   
ChrchofDrk


Posts: 304
Joined: 7/24/2013
Status: offline 		At least I'm not so ashamed of Myself as to keep My profile hidden. Best of luck in your endeavors as well

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/21/2014 3:30:57 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline 		FR

Some capitalise 'Peon', some don't. I don't care. I take the first as good manners in the standard way; I take the second as good manners in a non-standard way because it shows recognition that I'm a sub. I'm good either way.

As for other bits of protocol - like the capitalised 'Me' and 'Mine': again I don't care. But I will say that in general I quite like D/s protocol because I find it somewhat horny. Anything that gives me even a semi-stiffy is, ipso facto, correct.

So there it is: I have Spoken and the matter is resolved.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to ChrchofDrk)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/21/2014 3:34:48 AM   
PeonForHer


Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

So there it is: I have Spoken and the matter is resolved.


I wrote 'Spoken' that way as a joke but, on reflection, I think it's pretty cool. I want my (hypothetical) femdom to write it that way on selected occasions, too. Yes. Sausage time for peon/Peon.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com


(in reply to PeonForHer)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Is it me or does this annoy anyone else? - 8/21/2014 4:39:11 AM   
AKinkCounselor


Posts: 53
Joined: 8/12/2014
Status: offline 		Firstly, to the OP, I'm not really adding anything, apart from agreement with the fact that whatever turns you on is your thing, if that's capitalisation, then that's cool, if its not, well, that's cool too.

Secondly, apologies to the OP for the continuation of the hijacking!

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gauge


quote:

ORIGINAL: ChrchofDrk

No. I wasn't meaning to state I somehow knew more.

How cute. Shall we review the tape?


But I just wanted to say how much I do love these threads! - thanks for the chuckle Gauge / churchofdrk


Thirdly, I was reading your profile - with interest - churchofdrk, your journal talks of 'earning' the title of master. I'm curious if I wanted to be a master, is there like an exam or something I'd need to take? Is there a course? maybe a home study guide? - thanks (in advance) for your help :)

and again, apologies to OP, i just couldn't help myself

(I've really screwed up the capitalisation here, I Just don't know what i am any more)

(in reply to Gauge)
Profile   Post #: 60
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