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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 9:19:20 AM

FieryOpal

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Has anybody else noticed a pattern here? ALL of the ladies posting pro-bisexual male are bisexual themselves. (The same on a different thread about sissyCDs.) Birds of a feather flock together. It would appear that if you're a bisexual male, don't expect to be on a straight woman's relationship radar, unless you want to remain in the Friend Zone. Just saying.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 9:48:02 AM

littleladybug

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

Has anybody else noticed a pattern here? ALL of the ladies posting pro-bisexual male are bisexual themselves. (The same on a different thread about sissyCDs.) Birds of a feather flock together. It would appear that if you're a bisexual male, don't expect to be on a straight woman's relationship radar, unless you want to remain in the Friend Zone. Just saying.

An interesting point...and probably as good an explanation as any. *s*

What always strikes me with these sorts of discussions is how they inevitably come back to how "sad" it is that people aren't more open-minded in who they choose to have a relationship with. My list of likes and dislikes would get me into a lot of legal trouble if I were interviewing someone for a job or housing. (And, I would wager most other people's "lists" would get them into the same trouble.) But, what it comes down to, to me, is that this is not relevant in screening for interpersonal relationships. We like what we like. Period. Even if, for argument's sake, those "likes" or "dislikes" come from the most closed-minded attitudes....it's simply not relevant.

Who I choose to have a relationship with, on any level, is my own personal choice. And, who is anyone to crap on it?

Sure, one can think of how many wonderful people I am excluding because of the choices that I make, and I'm sure there's some validity to that. But, this isn't "littleladybug's all-inclusive love fest"....it's what, at the end of the day, will fulfill ME the most. And, that includes, but is not limited to, sexual attraction. Certain people fit the bill, and others don't. Simple fact of life.

Because I don't feel attraction toward bisexual males doesn't mean I am "hating on them"....much in the same way that I don't "hate on Dommes" because I don't feel that attraction.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 10:04:34 AM

FieryOpal

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

What always strikes me with these sorts of discussions is how they inevitably come back to how "sad" it is that people aren't more open-minded in who they choose to have a relationship with....

Who I choose to have a relationship with, on any level, is my own personal choice. And, who is anyone to crap on it?
<snip>

You know what it is, don't you? Males en masse are always trying to hedge their bets. Quantity over quality. Once they *grow up*, then it suddenly hits them that maybe they should be more selective for a change, and that each and every one of us deserves to find a suitable match for ourselves.

At the expense of sounding corny, though, I have no issue with whom anybody chooses to be happy with. By this, I mean that there is no impunity where love is concerned. The only issue I have, which I keep to myself for the most part, is the absence of love or the pursuit of pleasure for one's own pleasure's sake which will necessitate using others and thereby devaluing them and devaluing oneself in the process. Love trumps all.

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Post #: 23

RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 10:14:47 AM

RockaRolla

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I don't intend for this thread to turn into a "how sad it is" fest. And I hope that doesn't happen. I posed this question because I've encountered it so often, and it's a phenomenon I don't understand.

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Post #: 24

RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 10:49:26 AM

MariaB

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I certainly don't look down on people who are strictly straight. Each to their own and all that. We fall for people because of chemistry and chemistry is all that matters. There are a lot of myths around about bi men which seems pretty unfair... They must be promiscuous, they are sexual deviants, they haven't grown up yet, the reality is they are really gay and they often run off with other men, or they need another man in their lives. Just as each and every man is different so too is each and every bi male.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 11:08:55 AM

littleladybug

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quote:

ORIGINAL: RockaRolla

I don't intend for this thread to turn into a "how sad it is" fest. And I hope that doesn't happen. I posed this question because I've encountered it so often, and it's a phenomenon I don't understand.

I understand where you are coming from. And, I hope that, in turn, you understand where I am as well.

Honestly, I don't think that there's going to be any "black and white" explanation that will come out here. As I mentioned, I think FO's response is as good as any. I believe that we, at the end of the day, are products of what we know and who we are. And that is reflected in who we choose to have in our lives.

Now, in terms of "women being bi" being more acceptable... I keep going back to a male acquaintance of mine, and a conversation that we had several years ago. Literally, I remember exactly where we were when this topic came up....it was just that meaningful to me. He asked me.. "damn....was EVERY woman bi when they were in college?". That was...as he saw it...a "thing". And, he didn't like it. He actually went so far as to say that he would give his eye teeth to be with a woman who didn't have "that experience" simply because she felt like she should.

Of course, there are a lot of other issues going on here...but the point of it is....we are products of what we know. Porn...from the dawn of porn....has extolled the virtues of woman on woman. To say that it's routine is to undersell it. The hot guy looking on as the women pleasure themselves? Yup....

And, we, as women, have bought into it. And men have as well. It is not only accepted, but *expected*.

So, to compare *that* to bisexual males? Apples and freaking chimpanzees.

(in reply to RockaRolla)

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 11:30:27 AM

Lucylastic

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Im straight....I enjoy bi men, Im also over 50 and Ive had bi guys in my life since I was a teen...I consider myself fortunate to have known them....I lost my virginity to one.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 11:36:48 AM

PeonForHer

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quote:

I posed this question because I've encountered it so often, and it's a phenomenon I don't understand.

I've sometimes speculated that while women, in the round, want to branch out into new roles, they'd like men to stay largely as they are - as the 'devils women know', or as the ever-reliable rocks in the choppy seas that are their modern women's lives. Or some such stuff, which I freely admit is woolly and half formed in my head. Gawd knows. But I *have* noticed, for sure, an odd sort of conservatism regarding men amongst women (again speaking as a general thing), even those women who are keen kinksters. This subject reminds me of some research I once saw that showed that new mothers were in general a *lot* less keen to see their young sons playing with 'girls' toys' than they were to see their daughters play with 'boys' toys'.

Myself, I once calculated, in my late twenties, that I'd had 25 sexual partners (all female). Of those, only 3 had *not* had sexual fantasies that involved other women. Four of them had had female partners in the past. But it never once exercised me, with any of them, that I was twice as likely to be jilted because these women had the choice of both sexes rather than just one. And it never did happen.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 1:49:25 PM

IrishMist

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David is bisexual.
He still has sex with men.
I think it's hotter than fuck lol.
Maybe because to me, it is so primal and animalistic ; both of which are turn on's for me in men.

And yes, not only have I watched, but I have participated

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 1:53:33 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

Has anybody else noticed a pattern here? ALL of the ladies posting pro-bisexual male are bisexual themselves. (The same on a different thread about sissyCDs.) Birds of a feather flock together. It would appear that if you're a bisexual male, don't expect to be on a straight woman's relationship radar, unless you want to remain in the Friend Zone. Just saying.

I don't know FO lol.

I am straight

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 1:55:54 PM

Lucylastic

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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

David is bisexual.
He still has sex with men.
I think it's hotter than fuck lol.
Maybe because to me, it is so primal and animalistic ; both of which are turn on's for me in men.

And yes, not only have I watched, but I have participated

this

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 2:17:19 PM

PeonForHer

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Heh. Remember LadyPact? The one thing that would get her zooming like a hungry eagle into a thread was the subject of male-on-male gristle-gobbling. Yep, by god does that give some women the jollies.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 2:19:38 PM

Lucylastic

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yes, yes it does:) purrrrrrrrrrrrrrs

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 2:20:29 PM

IrishMist

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Heh. Remember LadyPact? The one thing that would get her zooming like a hungry eagle into a thread was the subject of male-on-male gristle-gobbling. Yep, by god does that give some women the jollies.

oh hell fucking yea lol

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 2:44:36 PM

xgender

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From: A psych ward east of the Mississippi
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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

You know what it is, don't you? Males en masse are always trying to hedge their bets. Quantity over quality. Once they *grow up*, then it suddenly hits them that maybe they should be more selective for a change, and that each and every one of us deserves to find a suitable match for ourselves.

At the expense of sounding corny, though, I have no issue with whom anybody chooses to be happy with. By this, I mean that there is no impunity where love is concerned. The only issue I have, which I keep to myself for the most part, is the absence of love or the pursuit of pleasure for one's own pleasure's sake which will necessitate using others and thereby devaluing them and devaluing oneself in the process. Love trumps all.

There seem to be some generalizations made (I imagine in an effort to understand) that are definitely unfair. FieryOpal, I think your experiences are coloring your perception a bit more than most when it comes to men...Whatever the reason - and as a male - I think you've missed the mark...

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 5:06:44 PM

FieryOpal

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quote:

ORIGINAL: xgender

There seem to be some generalizations made (I imagine in an effort to understand) that are definitely unfair. FieryOpal, I think your experiences are coloring your perception a bit more than most when it comes to men...Whatever the reason - and as a male - I think you've missed the mark...

At the point that I had posted, this was an accurate, preliminary assessment. I have seen this trend in my own experience as well. That other straight women have come forward helps to open up a dialogue, does it not? In any event, the OP's objective was to gain a better understanding of what were her own impressions at the time. Broader insight shouldn't have a downside.

As for hedging our bets, many of us gals do the same, but usually on a smaller scale.

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 5:16:06 PM

xgender

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Ya, stupid me, I tried to live vanilla and monogamously for the first 49 years of my life. And I've always been a very faithful partner (believe me on this one, lol), so no hedging my bets. Also, I love differently. I fall easily deeply and unconditionally. I also let go almost as easily. It makes me a good match for the poly lifestyle; along with the fact that I have a varied and voluminous sexual appetite - more than I believe can be met by one person...

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RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 5:23:55 PM

Marini

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

Has anybody else noticed a pattern here? ALL of the ladies posting pro-bisexual male are bisexual themselves. (The same on a different thread about sissyCDs.) Birds of a feather flock together. It would appear that if you're a bisexual male, don't expect to be on a straight woman's relationship radar, unless you want to remain in the Friend Zone. Just saying.

I have noticed this and you beat me to the punch!
I have been online for years, and on Collarme for years.
I read profiles from Dominants, submissives, men, women, straight, gay, and bisexual.
I am nosey like that.
I have noticed that many straight women, state they are only interested in straight men.

I have noticed that MANY of the women that are open to/or seek bi-sexual men, are often bi-sexual, this may not always be the case, but I have found it often to be the case.

I am terminally straight, and I just prefer a straight man.
No-judgement and certainly no hatred or dislike, just my preference.

< Message edited by Marini -- 10/30/2014 5:26:30 PM >

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Post #: 38

RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 5:27:31 PM

GoddessManko

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

Has anybody else noticed a pattern here? ALL of the ladies posting pro-bisexual male are bisexual themselves. (The same on a different thread about sissyCDs.) Birds of a feather flock together. It would appear that if you're a bisexual male, don't expect to be on a straight woman's relationship radar, unless you want to remain in the Friend Zone. Just saying.

Wow FieryOpal, really?
So now you are going to categorically label us as being biasedly inclined to bisexual men because we are bisexual ourselves? As if your opinion isn't just completely doused in prejudice and bias itself. I tried to ignore your sexuality bias but for some reason you are the greatest advocate against something that doesn't concern you at all. Nor do you have the scope of what ANYONE'S individual thoughts are on sexuality though self dubbing yourself an expert on something you know little to nothing about. Here is a bit of an epiphany for you.
Not all CDs, transgendered or sissies are at all inclined to those of their birth gender. Not all of them see themselves as feminine AT ALL. Some just enjoy the taboo like I do. You enjoy but a tiny drizzle of what I would consider kinky and of course a lot of our interests may seem "bizarre" or "out there" to YOU, but they work for us, and there's nothing at all wrong with that. You stick with your tiny little list of kinks and we'll stick with our array. I like being explorative AND a LOVING DOMME.
I noticed something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT than you did, the age gap of those more accepting of differing sexualities than those who are not. I am sure back when bisexuality was very tongue in cheek, many gay men hid in the closet and tried to work both sides of the fence to the best of their ability. Only to come out later as gay,totally believable. Harvey Milk was assassinated in San Fran for being gay only a few decades ago which is now the gay and millionaire mecca of the US.
Sub men are now faced with that "inner turmoil" currently where they somehow have this warped perception their submissive role is a "new concept" or something they cannot keep in the closet (or dungeon for that matter). It's not, people need to just respect each other's kinks and sexual preferences. It's promising the younger generation understand that overall. "Jus' sayin"- ET.

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Post #: 39

RE: Why the hate on bi men? - 10/30/2014 5:32:45 PM

Marini

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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Heh. Remember LadyPact? The one thing that would get her zooming like a hungry eagle into a thread was the subject of male-on-male gristle-gobbling. Yep, by god does that give some women the jollies.

oh hell fucking yea lol

Funny thing is, I enjoy gay porn {men and women}.

I think male on male action is hot as hell.
I even fell for the cutest gay male couple that I met in San Fran, and I had fantasies...oh hell thats another story.

I don't even enjoy bisexual porn.
lol
I like them gay or straight.
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Live and let live, as always.
Peace

< Message edited by Marini -- 10/30/2014 5:37:32 PM >

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Post #: 40

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