RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman

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PeonForHer -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 2:52:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Phoenixpower Indeed...I know this from the UK and Germany as well...its not an american thing... No, it's not, unfortunately. Most of the women I know here in the UK have made similar complaints at one time or another. I suspect that the root problem is such men either don't know, or don't care about, just how threatening that kind of behaviour can be. But that's really just to state the bleeding obvious, I suppose.

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 2:56:35 PM)
I must have been very fortunate then. I have lived in a number of large towns and cities all over the UK and not seen any of this type of behaviour at all, not anywhere. Even when wife#1 (aged 21) wore micro skirts, stockings and barely-legal tops showing off her huge boobs did we see this.

crazyml -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 2:56:56 PM)
Alrighty I think that you'd have to be a pretty fucking stupid man to try to find an excuse for the harassment the woman received. Who the fuck do they think they are? total fucking strangers interfering with another person's right to get on with their shit without having their train of thought interrupted. Now, I do think that context is important and that in some cases a "have a good day" isn't out of order, even to a stranger - but the remarks this woman received were pretty obviously a result of her being objectified.... treated like a piece of meat. What sort of over inflated self-image must they have to believe that a complete stranger would give a flying fuck about their opinion as to her attractiveness. Yes, it's easy to say "oh, they're just being friendly" - and it could be that they genuinely think that they are "just being friendly" but that doesn't excuse it. If they are really into "being friendly" and they knew that their un-asked for intrusions into her life were offensive to her they'd shut the fuck up. I think another poster has made this point already, but I used to have to work with a tosser who regularly wolf whistled girls, and then got into a proper piss if anyone wolf whistled his sister. Hypocritical little turd. I think that men who are stupid enough to call out like this should at least be given one chance to understand that their "friendliness" is actually harassment, after that they should be called out for being mysgynistic little stains

SweetForDaddy -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 2:58:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Charles6682 I've spoken up. Like I said before, some guys need to stop acting like animals when women walk down the street. Stop blaming the female because she is wearing something and then blame her because she shouldn't be wearing tight clothes or whatever. How about a man take responsibility for his own dam actions and stop acting like an animal. I sadly did see the other video of the girl being abducted in Philly a few days ago. Its crap like that, which is very disturbing. That lady didn't do anything but walk down the street and some piece of human trash waits and then abducts her. This is no laughing matter. Not all men are animals like that. Perhaps it is time for the men who do care about these issues, to stand up to the jerks who think women are nothing more than a sex object. Yes, I am a male sub and respect women anyways. But it goes beyond that. This is a human rights issue that must be dealt with. I've read a lot of interesting books on feminism lately. Feminists make some very good points. The only one things about the nazi-feminists that I disagree with is that all men are bad. That kind of thinking only divides people who do care with the "us vs them" mentality. There are some good men who do care and want to help to make a positive differences in the world, for ALL Humans. I am one of those guys. I'm glad you spoke up, I don't think this will really change unless men are behind it too, I was really disappointed with how most of the guys on Youtube commented, I expected men to care more. As for standing up for the jerks...I do wonder if a lot of men are scared of these guys too, like the worst of them are obnoxious, loud and have no obvious social skills and people like that are unpredictable. The risk of confronting them is probably too high for men to call them on verbal abuse alone. I actually agree with that decision really, I mean I would prefer to be cat called and walk on than have someone get into a physical fight over it. But its like a bullies in the playground kind of dilemma, what the hell do you do with them.

SweetForDaddy -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:24:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GoddessManko I think the issue is not that it's being done but the frequency of it. I am not sure if it's a male thing on a biological level. Twice RIGHT NEXT to me, there has been a collision. One time, yes...I was wearing a kimikal corset and miniskirt, feeling frisky. But the other time, I had on a really nice cropped neck sweater and decently mid thigh skirt. A collision, lol. I've actually seen this too, with a friend of mine though. It's some crazy shit when guys are crashing their cars because they are leering at some woman on the street. I don't think its biological though, I mean men do have self-control don't they, otherwise all men would do it.

shiftyw -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:24:54 PM)
Crazyml that is pretty much how I feel. And when women do it to men, I feel it's as rude. And even if the guy is brad freaking pitt it is still entitled rude behavior. i also think it does come down to what Marc said like three pages ago.

PeonForHer -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:33:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1 I must have been very fortunate then. I have lived in a number of large towns and cities all over the UK and not seen any of this type of behaviour at all, not anywhere. Even when wife#1 (aged 21) wore micro skirts, stockings and barely-legal tops showing off her huge boobs did we see this. To be fair, it could be because I lived in areas that had very UKIP-style cultures for much of my life.

PeonForHer -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:45:37 PM)
quote: And when women do it to men, I feel it's as rude. It's as rude, but rarely as potentially dangerous. I assume the potential for danger makes the big difference - what makes a mere annoyance something that's actually unsettling. Sometimes I try to imagine what it'd be like if half the adult population were a third bigger and stronger than me, more aggressive - especially sexually .... It's difficult, of course. Moreover, those are things that most feminists I've come across take as 'self evident' and don't bother to talk about, mark you.

YouName -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:52:14 PM)
freedomdwarf; what you may have seen being done to your 21 year old wife may not be the whole story, considering that these guys also see you...with her. Seriously, they may be dim, chauvinistic and horny but even they might not want to get beaten up. Crazyml, they are probably anything but mysogonists ;) Generally I think we are all making to big of a deal of this for several reasons! 1. Video is probably semi fake 2. Other people have done it before and in a far more interesting way, the girl confronting the people that call her out was interesting. 3. More serious shit happens, shit people sadly don't react to. I think someone posted about this but there is a video out there of a social experiment where something that clearly sounds as rape is heard from a van. Like 50% of the people just walk past. People walk past people dying in the streets. I really can't give more than two fucks about this and even that's stretching it.

SweetnStormySub -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:54:16 PM)
FR Just caught a news item out of Detroit. On video, the abduction of a young woman was captured. There's no audio, and it's so disturbing. She was walking home when this happened. Surely there is enough light left in this world to combat this evil.

SweetForDaddy -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:56:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: And when women do it to men, I feel it's as rude. It's as rude, but rarely as potentially dangerous. I assume the potential for danger makes the big difference - what makes a mere annoyance something that's actually unsettling. Sometimes I try to imagine what it'd be like if half the adult population were a third bigger and stronger than me, more aggressive - especially sexually .... It's difficult, of course. Moreover, those are things that most feminists I've come across take as 'self evident' and don't bother to talk about, mark you. Thats how I feel about it too, its the physical strength differences that make it more threatening for a woman, it's about power. Some guy did a video on the same theme, but it was like a joke really, the two videos couldn't really be called similar. He did get comments but I don't think he felt any fear during his little jaunt. I honestly think a lot of men would love it actually, or at least think they would, which is maybe why a lot find it hard to empathise with us.

PeonForHer -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:58:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SweetnStormySub FR Just caught a news item out of Detroit. On video, the abduction of a young woman was captured. There's no audio, and it's so disturbing. She was walking home when this happened. Surely there is enough light left in this world to combat this evil. I saw that item, too. Seriously disturbing. That poor woman really did look like she was fighting for her life.

YouName -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:58:29 PM)
That's horrible. Detroit, the higher you're up the harder you fall. In my country there are some nice projects. For example in this town experiencing some serious sexual assault cases in recent past some girls who are unemployed started a Girl Taxi to take women from the city centre to their homes, for free. Other people in the town are giving them free petrol and food and such. There's some light out there!

shiftyw -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 3:58:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: And when women do it to men, I feel it's as rude. It's as rude, but rarely as potentially dangerous. I assume the potential for danger makes the big difference - what makes a mere annoyance something that's actually unsettling. Sometimes I try to imagine what it'd be like if half the adult population were a third bigger and stronger than me, more aggressive - especially sexually .... It's difficult, of course. Moreover, those are things that most feminists I've come across take as 'self evident' and don't bother to talk about, mark you. I'm purposely avoiding that topic so as to not be crucified or burned at the stake

YouName -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:05:49 PM)
Nah mate, the people who would crucify you over that are stupid. Of course there's a difference. Generalization is good. It is the way we identify the part of the world around us about which we aren't sure. Far more men rape women out in the streets than the other way around. There is a muscle ratio there. When someone approaches you this way you know they want something else from you than the time or a few quid for parking. But there's also the context. A busy street should feel a bit safer than a quiet alley and immediately the persons intentions become more suspect as well. But in that case I'd almost rather want the potential rapist warning me than staying quiet.

PeonForHer -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:08:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shiftyw quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: And when women do it to men, I feel it's as rude. It's as rude, but rarely as potentially dangerous. I assume the potential for danger makes the big difference - what makes a mere annoyance something that's actually unsettling. Sometimes I try to imagine what it'd be like if half the adult population were a third bigger and stronger than me, more aggressive - especially sexually .... It's difficult, of course. Moreover, those are things that most feminists I've come across take as 'self evident' and don't bother to talk about, mark you. I'm purposely avoiding that topic so as to not be crucified or burned at the stake Why? Would talking about even such simple and obvious matters as this get you maligned as a 'feminazi' or similar?

shiftyw -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:29:12 PM)
We were already told in this thread that a personally responsible lady would learn self defense or carry a gun. We were also told that was a reasonable thing for a 14 year old. I am trying to not "make every man a rapist" Having already gone three rounds with another poster, I really wish to not be victim blamed again honestly. To me it is a huge factor. A guy can likely outrun, out hit, and out fight me, even given any training. I agree it is a huge factor in why it being done to females is intimidating. I also just feel women have no way to respond to this which is comfortable. Engaging them may go well, it may not, it will certainly encourage the behavior, which is at least irritating. If you call them out, they might get really aggressive. If you ignore them they might follow you for five blocks. A man is completely putting you in a position where they hold all the cards. It is objectifying and in my opinion, more often then not, aggressive. Obviously context is important. Even a hello can be scary in the appropriate context.

smileforme50 -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:33:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SweetForDaddy quote: ORIGINAL: Charles6682 I've spoken up. Like I said before, some guys need to stop acting like animals when women walk down the street. Stop blaming the female because she is wearing something and then blame her because she shouldn't be wearing tight clothes or whatever. How about a man take responsibility for his own dam actions and stop acting like an animal. I sadly did see the other video of the girl being abducted in Philly a few days ago. Its crap like that, which is very disturbing. That lady didn't do anything but walk down the street and some piece of human trash waits and then abducts her. This is no laughing matter. Not all men are animals like that. Perhaps it is time for the men who do care about these issues, to stand up to the jerks who think women are nothing more than a sex object. Yes, I am a male sub and respect women anyways. But it goes beyond that. This is a human rights issue that must be dealt with. I've read a lot of interesting books on feminism lately. Feminists make some very good points. The only one things about the nazi-feminists that I disagree with is that all men are bad. That kind of thinking only divides people who do care with the "us vs them" mentality. There are some good men who do care and want to help to make a positive differences in the world, for ALL Humans. I am one of those guys. I'm glad you spoke up, I don't think this will really change unless men are behind it too, I was really disappointed with how most of the guys on Youtube commented, I expected men to care more. As for standing up for the jerks...I do wonder if a lot of men are scared of these guys too, like the worst of them are obnoxious, loud and have no obvious social skills and people like that are unpredictable. The risk of confronting them is probably too high for men to call them on verbal abuse alone. I actually agree with that decision really, I mean I would prefer to be cat called and walk on than have someone get into a physical fight over it. But its like a bullies in the playground kind of dilemma, what the hell do you do with them. A form of bullying....that is exactly what it is. Women do what they were taught to do when they were kids and other kids said rude things to them....ignore them and just keep walking. It's a way to handle the problem....but not necessarily the best way to handle it.

SweetnStormySub -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:36:46 PM)
@shiftyw ^5s. You expressed it brilliantly. That one who trivialized and mocked those of us who have been attacked needs to address her own issues before she tries to wear a judge's robe.

DerangedUnit -> RE: 10 hours of walking in NYC as a woman (11/4/2014 4:39:36 PM)
I think it has a lot to do with area, cant speak for other countries but for me it's always been worst in cali, where as in the northeast you can start a conversation with guys on the street of a big city and walk away when you are done talking. It seems worst in areas with high cost of living probably because people have to be more agressive to get by and that's seen as the desirable demeanor.... I've never had a problem in Detroit but I wasn't there for long enough to make a direct comparison.

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