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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 3:51:27 PM

littleladybug

Posts: 1082
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kallisto

That even though I was young and inexperienced and wet behind the ears, didn't mean that my thoughts and ideas and feelings were inadequate or insignificant or didn't carry as much weight.

Can I get another *amen*?

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 3:53:36 PM

ExiledTyrant

Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

quote:

ORIGINAL: kallisto

That even though I was young and inexperienced and wet behind the ears, didn't mean that my thoughts and ideas and feelings were inadequate or insignificant or didn't carry as much weight.

Can I get another *amen*?

Will a Hell Yes do?

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 3:59:13 PM

shiftyw

Posts: 2837
Joined: 6/6/2013
From: The Shire
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

quote:

ORIGINAL: kallisto

That even though I was young and inexperienced and wet behind the ears, didn't mean that my thoughts and ideas and feelings were inadequate or insignificant or didn't carry as much weight.

Can I get another *amen*?

Here here!

(in reply to littleladybug)

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Post #: 23

RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 4:00:20 PM

littleladybug

Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

Will a Hell Yes do?

Hell yeah!!!

(No real reason for that smiley...except I'm confused as to the lack of the expression on the *spanker*....)

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Post #: 24

RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 4:51:48 PM

pleasesir88

Posts: 17
Joined: 4/24/2011
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

quote:

ORIGINAL: kallisto

That even though I was young and inexperienced and wet behind the ears, didn't mean that my thoughts and ideas and feelings were inadequate or insignificant or didn't carry as much weight.

Can I get another *amen*?

Beautiful!

(in reply to littleladybug)

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Post #: 25

RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 5:10:15 PM

ExiledTyrant

Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

Will a Hell Yes do?

Hell yeah!!!

(No real reason for that smiley...except I'm confused as to the lack of the expression on the *spanker*....)

HELL YES!

(He's really focused)

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/24/2014 5:11:49 PM

littleladybug

Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant

(He's really focused)

Ok, I'll accept that....

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/25/2014 1:30:25 PM

RockaRolla

Posts: 1153
Joined: 1/20/2014
From: South Florida
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"Younger" for me is a few years ago, but:

Most of the people who talk to you (at least in the local scene) have the primary objective of getting in your pants, not being your friend.
This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but if they can't get that much many of them WILL stop talking to you.

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~Roxie

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/28/2014 1:14:47 PM

lthrpup

Posts: 125
Joined: 4/28/2004
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That just about everything to do with WIIWD exists on a scale rather than binary yes/no, so trying to find the right labels for me and my kinks was a fool's errand.

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/28/2014 1:52:13 PM

ExiledTyrant

Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lthrpup

That just about everything to do with WIIWD exists on a scale rather than binary yes/no, so trying to find the right labels for me and my kinks was a fool's errand.

01001001 00100000 01100001 01101101 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 01110100 01100001 01101100 00100000 01100001 01100111 01110010 01100101 01100101 01101101 01100101 01101110 01110100 00101110 00100000 01001010 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01110011 01100001 01111001 01101001 01101110 01100111

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Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/28/2014 2:57:58 PM

DeviantlyD

Posts: 4375
Joined: 5/26/2007
From: Hawai`i
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That reminds me of a joke. Of a sort.

There are 10 types of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don't.

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ExiledTyrant's groupie. Catering to his ego since May 26, 2007. :D

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 11/28/2014 5:44:58 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pleasesir88

Exactly what it says on the tin.

What are somethings that you wish you had known when you were younger/started getting into BDSM?

For me, it was that an older dominant doesn't necessarily mean experienced or trustworthy, and that nothing replaces good ol' discussion on limits and interests.

I wish I'd known it existed!

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 11:22:36 AM

kelvarolvar32073

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Joined: 11/29/2014
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I wish I properly knew how to introduce myself to a sub.

(in reply to kallisto)

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 11:29:57 AM

ExiledTyrant

Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kelvarolvar32073

I wish I properly knew how to introduce myself to a sub.

Okie-dokie... first of all, your profile reads like it was written by a sub. You are the author of your world, by all means use your profile as your creative canvas.

Jus sayin

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Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 1:01:35 PM

Drackula

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Joined: 11/29/2014
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I would never have married my hag wife - I just like using the word hag when I can- one rarely gets to use the word without getting into trouble - althpough the word used correctly makes me smile/laugh (and I am not saying I was her cup or tea – but is a fine example to cite - an I am okay citing myself as some of you know but we divorced many eons ago so everything worked out exactly the way it was supposed to from the beginning; chain of events, predestination, malarkey and quantum pixies.

So, I would have been less accepting if i was younger is that not arse for elbow? I as i know some of you are puzzled with my words, here and there, therefore tonight i will explain some
a. “you do not know your arse from your elbow” = to be stupid and unable to understand very simple things. Also add in, the way I used it, it means back to front, the wrong way round, etc.

This must also be balanced with many people know nothing earlier on - or indeed later on - >50% of these so called experienced people who find there way to these sites are infact attached/married – they quickly adopt their relevant persona and lure in the gullable with their malarkey and how experienced they are – which they glean from cavity and any stereotypical comments/stories over all the whole internet.
The mistake is to believe word of the aforementioned lot.

1. We are who we are, who we always were - this cannot be changed, ever. And I am not getting involved into a conditioning, we can change, suppression, etc debate. We cannot.
I thought my wife would change, grow develop - certainly beyond the lights on off stage - this did not occur it got worse
2. Some may flower a little more
3. “older dominant” you need to balance that out with younger, same age – some may know nothing – some may know everything – some may grow and evolve
4. I have seen the world it horrifies me as most people are wrong & I know everything; stereotypical argument kneel before I, and be prepared to do my bidding and have yer cavities stretched - or perhaps I know nothing

Who is to be believed!
Me – perhaps I am a lying construct
Many others – if so? why so? and who is believing them? – this latter lot must all burden an equal responsibility

How do you know, should know etc.

Your only rule - ignore anyone evasive and who cannot reciprocate in and equal fashion and who has no proof of reality - this will get rid of 90% dodgy gits immediately
unfortunately it may well scare the shy.
But at the end of the day if someone has an interest in any type of relationship, yet has no proof of concept, save the usual excuses they should be avoided.

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 2:06:28 PM

Charles6682

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I started in the fetish scene at a younger age. I would not have known then, what I know now. Experience has taught me a lot.

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https://Twitter.com/SubGuy6682

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 5:14:01 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: pleasesir88

Exactly what it says on the tin.

What are somethings that you wish you had known when you were younger/started getting into BDSM?

For me, it was that an older dominant doesn't necessarily mean experienced or trustworthy, and that nothing replaces good ol' discussion on limits and interests.

I wish I'd have known that you marry her mother.

I'd have run like fire.

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Post #: 37

RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/1/2014 5:44:49 PM

SweetForDaddy

Posts: 167
Joined: 5/17/2014
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That being a total bitch probably isn't the best way to find someone who will dominate me.

That I can be a feminist and a submissive.

That it doesn't really matter why I'm submissive (I've spent way too much time pondering this, never come to a proper conclusion and it took me a long time to realise that it doesn't really matter to me why or how, just that I am).

< Message edited by SweetForDaddy -- 12/1/2014 5:46:36 PM >

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/2/2014 6:31:14 AM

CaptR

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Joined: 4/25/2012
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I wish ... I wish I had listened to my mom and not stuck the tweezers into the light socket. Nothing has surprised me more since.
I second Kaliko with her thoughts on intimidation/credit and ET with his on integrity. Yet when I reflect I feel fortunate those things I could wish to know or change occurred. They shaped who I am for better or worse. Gave me confidence, experience, knowledge and wisdom. Not to mention a shit ton of fun and memories to ruminate over the day before I die.

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RE: Things I wish I had known when I was younger. - 12/2/2014 11:26:41 PM

Greta75

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This question stuns me. I've been into bdsm since a kid.
On a level, I know it's not something you tell people that you are into, so I've always been closet about it, as IN, do not share this part of me with my family or vanilla life, but I have always been practicing it guilt free, I never questioned myself about it. I enjoyed it and I just enjoy it. And it always feel like, some things in life are to be enjoyed, but not understood by everybody in this world.

The only one time I ran into a dominant who was a predator was when I took every precaution. You know, hang out as friends first, talk like friends, with no sex or bdsm involve, for first 5 months. Before getting into play, took my time to get to know him.

So I don't know what I can learn from that lesson really, I thought I did everything cautiously and correctly. But maybe what I should have learnt is that, the fact that it took 5 months for me to feel comfortable with him, despite daily chatting and weekly meetings. Should say alot to me. My gut is telling me something is wrong, even though he behaves like the nicest and most perfect man. And the right person should feel right from day 1. It shouldn't take this much time.

The one dom who was my perfect mesh, I jump into play immediately within 48 hours as my gut or my soul recognized him as my master, and I just knew I would be safe with him.

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