whitebottomboy
Posts: 11
Joined: 12/9/2014
Status: offline
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I have found this thread to be fascinating and educational.
The subject of the OP reminds me of the people who adamantly claim that you should not be allowed to call the music you make Bluegrass if you are not performing the exact songs that appear on Bill Monroe albums and must be singing the harmony parts exactly like they do on the record.
So I am not surprised that people chime in to say there is no one carved-in-stone way to be dominant or submissive. But in my short time reading about such things across the world wide web, I often see people claiming there is, and someone isn't a "true dominant" or whatever if they do not do things a certain way. I also found it interesting that almost all of them are male.
But as to THIS thread, it appears as if you are all talking about the same thing, when you aren't.
All the opinions here seem valid to me, despite contradictions, because some of you are referring to a slave while others are talking about their boyfriend. And in several cases you are someone with multiple slaves or subs and likely have varying degrees of physical and emotional intimacy with them.
If anything, it brings home just how personal D/s oriented things really are.
Also, the subject concerns having sex with a sub. I would assume that refers to more than intercourse, and basically anything that would be considered "sexual relations."
Having traditional sexual intercourse to its conclusion could be considered quite differently from tying someone down and manipulating them sexually with your hand or implements. But some would still consider the latter as "having sex with a submissive" regardless of whether there are orgasms or "an exchange of bodily fluids" involved, or if the sub is a paying client or your husband.
I found this thread because I got on here to post a related query.
I may be about to begin my first real life experiences under the tutelage of a lifestyle domme. She is more domestic than dungeon oriented and not a player in the wider public scene. This could possibly evolve through a boarder "dating" relationship, to become a sexual relationship in the "significant other" way.
But it is made clear it would forever be devoid of male-penetrate-female intercourse.
I had wondered how common or atypical that was in the F/m D/s BDSM world. But this thread seems to suggest that what is most common isn't just not having traditional coitus intercourse, but not having any sexual relations at all that could be described as "having sex with a submissive."
And I wonder if that is an accurate assessment in the opinion of those who are reading or taking part in this thread.
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RE: Sex with submissives - 
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