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RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 8:51:25 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 141
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 8:54:22 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I'm sorry CD I had no idea you're such a delicate flower. I'll be more careful in the future. <runs>


He's an orchid among the weeds.

Jus sayin

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to LiveSpark)
Profile   Post #: 142
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 8:55:10 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin
You tricky devil...I LOVE that idea.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 143
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:01:19 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Well that's you eliminated from the list of potentials. Thanks for playing.


Oh well, you sound like too much work anyway. Anyone more intelligent than meatloaf is exhausting to deal with.


_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to LiveSpark)
Profile   Post #: 144
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:04:42 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin


That means I'd have to work on my knot tying'... Again too much work!

_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 145
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:24:46 AM   
ExiledTyrant


Posts: 4547
Joined: 12/9/2013
From: Exiled
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin


That means I'd have to work on my knot tying'... Again too much work!


Oddly enough with much proficiency it carries over into "able bodied seaman" licenser.

Jus sayin

_____________________________

Gnothi Seauton
To lead, first follow: Aurelius, Epictetus, Descartes, Sun Tzu, to name a few.

Semper fidelis (which sometimes feels like a burden)

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 146
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:28:53 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I'm sorry CD I had no idea you're such a delicate flower. I'll be more careful in the future. <runs>


He's an orchid among the weeds.

Jus sayin
Purple IS my color...royal, you know.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 147
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:29:07 AM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch

Delete unread means nothing more to me than the person is uninterested. It's no worse than a no reply to an initial greeting. I get that the women here deal with message overload and large creeper population, so I don't judge that lack of courtesy too harshly. There are far worse things to get butt hurt about...

As a cold contact, your message may have landed in that lady's Bulk Mail, and so you didn't fit her mail parameters to begin with. Blank profiles (not that yours is) automatically get routed to mine. You at least have a picture up of yourself, so that does help tremendously. As much as I would like to say that intellect, communications skills, conversational acumen, and a kind heart are more important to me, I still have certain "types" I either go for or which I don't. (I will occasionally make an exception for an impressive and interesting personality.)

I would like to point out that if I'm not mistaken, more men's initial contact messages will get Deleted Unread, unless his response is unsurly as to not fitting the criteria desired (then it may be that message instead).

More women's messages turning down men who don't meet their specs will tend to get Deleted Unread or show as not opened as read, I would presume, both from experience and from what other women have described.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch

But I'll be damned if I write a long insightful message before making initial contact. Those who think they deserve the effort of "something interesting" before replying to a pleasant greeting are thinking just a little too high of themselves.

You are not a male sub among a sea of other male subs on this site. Even then, why shouldn't a woman think highly enough of herself to deserve the best there is? Does a woman have to be a Domme or a S/switch in order to garner any special effort on your part to make a good first impression?

In general and not to make it personal, observation-wise, but are you saying that you know that you aren't the cream of the crop (or have no game) or, rather, that you esteem yourself so highly that you feel a female sub should be the one who gets flattered by your attention? If that's not the kind of read-between-the-lines message an man wishes to convey, then perhaps he should rethink his approach.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 148
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 9:57:59 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal

quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch

But I'll be damned if I write a long insightful message before making initial contact. Those who think they deserve the effort of "something interesting" before replying to a pleasant greeting are thinking just a little too high of themselves.

You are not a male sub among a sea of other male subs on this site. Even then, why shouldn't a woman think highly enough of herself to deserve the best there is? Does a woman have to be a Domme or a S/switch in order to garner any special effort on your part to make a good first impression?

In general and not to make it personal, observation-wise, but are you saying that you know that you aren't the cream of the crop (or have no game) or, rather, that you esteem yourself so highly that you feel a female sub should be the one who gets flattered by your attention? If that's not the kind of read-between-the-lines message an man wishes to convey, then perhaps he should rethink his approach.


My point is when I meet people, I start with a friendly greeting, I don't open with an insightful and revealing dissertation. If my salutation is returned in kind, THEN I'll put more effort into getting to know someone and opening up about myself. I apply the same criteria to online communication. If someone is so passive or jaded as to not feel the need to return a friendly introduction because it's not "interesting enough", we likely won't click anyway, so there's no reason to put forth undue effort up front.


< Message edited by Hotch -- 1/6/2015 10:03:07 AM >

_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 149
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:09:42 AM   
NookieNotes


Posts: 1720
Joined: 11/10/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch
But I'll be damned if I write a long insightful message before making initial contact. Those who think they deserve the effort of "something interesting" before replying to a pleasant greeting are thinking just a little too high of themselves.


I couldn't disagree more. Not only do I write something thoughtful and tailored to whomever I'm writing, when I do write to tohers, those types of messages are the ones I read as well.

And to be clear: I have no messages go into bulk mail (never bothered with settings), and I read and respond to every message I get, even if it's "No, thank you."

As far as messages, though, and relationships, I'm more of the mindset of win, or fail spectacularly. I don't mind losing when I do my best. I hate losing for being lazy (and winning while being lazy is just icky).

_____________________________

Nookie
--
https://datingkinky.com

I Write! A few of my books on Amazon: http://amazon.com/author/msnnotes

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 150
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:11:40 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin


That means I'd have to work on my knot tying'... Again too much work!


Oddly enough with much proficiency it carries over into "able bodied seaman" licenser.

Jus sayin

Yep, I know... "The rabbit comes out of the hole, goes around the tree and back in the hole" :D

_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 151
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:16:31 AM   
FieryOpal


Posts: 2821
Joined: 12/8/2013
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch

My point is when I meet people, I start with a friendly greeting, I don't open with an insightful and revealing dissertation. If my salutation is returned in kind, THEN I'll put more effort into getting to know someone and opening up about myself. I apply the same criteria to online communication. If someone is so passive or jaded as to not feel the need to return a friendly introduction because it's not "interesting enough", we likely won't click anyway, so there's no reason to put forth undue effort up front.


Again, since we're speaking from polarized perspectives (as F/m-M/f counterparts, not in a complementary fashion), and I assume you wouldn't ordinarily be contacting a Domme, Dommes do get contacted by Doms. They know they're reaching for a longshot in the vast majority of cases, so they do take the time to personalize their messages.

The gist of it is that when somebody, whether male or female, takes the time to personalize their message, their chances will be greater of eliciting a response. All it takes is a sentence to show that you've actually read through their profiles and/or journal entries. What works for you individually is your own prerogative.

The only kinds of messages I have Deleted Unread are those which are obscenely obscene, vulgar, or which come with a Bulk-Prevented-From-Messaging warning and/or is clearly a form letter mass-mailed to every Domme across the globe.

_____________________________

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. - Lao Tzu
There is no remedy for love but to love more. - Thoreau

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 152
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:18:54 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch
But I'll be damned if I write a long insightful message before making initial contact. Those who think they deserve the effort of "something interesting" before replying to a pleasant greeting are thinking just a little too high of themselves.


I couldn't disagree more. Not only do I write something thoughtful and tailored to whomever I'm writing, when I do write to tohers, those types of messages are the ones I read as well.

And to be clear: I have no messages go into bulk mail (never bothered with settings), and I read and respond to every message I get, even if it's "No, thank you."

As far as messages, though, and relationships, I'm more of the mindset of win, or fail spectacularly. I don't mind losing when I do my best. I hate losing for being lazy (and winning while being lazy is just icky).

Thank you for being considerate enough to respond with a "Thank you, but no". You have no idea how well received that small courtesy is. I respect that kindness very much.

And of course, any communication, even the initial contact should be written for the individual, nobody likes to feel like they're getting a mass mailer.

_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to NookieNotes)
Profile   Post #: 153
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:22:26 AM   
Bhruic


Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline 		I do find it amusing.

I have read your profile. You "run" a profile, offer sessions, expect a tribute, and make it clear that it is all for you and you care nothing "in the slightest" for the needs of the potential "slave". I find it disingenuous in the extreme to make the claim that you are not a FinDomme.

So yes... I find their reactions to you amusing, but probably not for the reasons you do.

I also find it amusing that you claim it doesn't bother you. Expressing compensatory amusement that someone thinks they have "the upper hand" while declaring to no one in particular your opinion that they did not get the upper hand, is pretty obvious evidence that your ego was bruised.

< Message edited by Bhruic -- 1/6/2015 10:32:22 AM >

_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to Kana)
Profile   Post #: 154
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:24:25 AM   
Hotch


Posts: 267
Joined: 5/13/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: FieryOpal


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch

My point is when I meet people, I start with a friendly greeting, I don't open with an insightful and revealing dissertation. If my salutation is returned in kind, THEN I'll put more effort into getting to know someone and opening up about myself. I apply the same criteria to online communication. If someone is so passive or jaded as to not feel the need to return a friendly introduction because it's not "interesting enough", we likely won't click anyway, so there's no reason to put forth undue effort up front.


Again, since we're speaking from polarized perspectives (as F/m-M/f counterparts, not in a complementary fashion), and I assume you wouldn't ordinarily be contacting a Domme, Dommes do get contacted by Doms. They know they're reaching for a longshot in the vast majority of cases, so they do take the time to personalize their messages.

The gist of it is that when somebody, whether male or female, takes the time to personalize their message, their chances will be greater of eliciting a response. All it takes is a sentence to show that you've actually read through their profiles and/or journal entries. What works for you individually is your own prerogative.

The only kinds of messages I have Deleted Unread are those which are obscenely obscene, vulgar, or which come with a Bulk-Prevented-From-Messaging warning and/or is clearly a form letter mass-mailed to every Domme across the globe.

I can only speak for myself, but all communication should be personalized. You're trying to make acquaintance with someone, not spam the whole site. I've had very pleasant communication with tops and bottoms of both genders here. After all, people are people first, its shared interests that lead to how a relationship developes.

_____________________________

Dont worry about avoiding temptation because as you get older, temptation will avoid YOU.

(in reply to FieryOpal)
Profile   Post #: 155
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:43:09 AM   
Bhruic


Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: theprlncesslucy

I'm retiring from this conversation as anything I say is met with disbelief. I could say I have met a lot of people from here and fetlife in the last 3 months and all ended well, but no point. I don't think you guys realise it, but most of your assumptions have been based on what I look like. For a fetish site I find that quite narrow minded.


That is not true in my case... My impression of you comes from what you have written in your profile, which represents you as a somewhat reprehensible person.

_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to theprlncesslucy)
Profile   Post #: 156
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:45:31 AM   
Bhruic


Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: smartsub10


quote:

ORIGINAL: theprlncesslucy

I'm retiring from this conversation as anything I say is met with disbelief. I could say I have met a lot of people from here and fetlife in the last 3 months and all ended well, but no point. I don't think you guys realise it, but most of your assumptions have been based on what I look like. For a fetish site I find that quite narrow minded.


This is just too funny. I've been following this thread for a while and cannot see, for the life of me, how you came to that conclusion.


How?... clinical narcissism.



_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to smartsub10)
Profile   Post #: 157
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 10:55:15 AM   
Bhruic


Posts: 985
Joined: 4/11/2012
From: Toronto, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: domincalifornia

I think it's more likely that people knew she was a domme and were just sending out form letters to her without reading her profile or skimming it. When she responded, they probably read her profile, saw she was after money, and blocked her. That seems more likely to me than that a great mass of people are missing that she lists herself as dominant.


Personally, I doubt people would have lost interest even if she wanted money... It was more likely this statement:

"It is about me and what I want. I do not care about your needs in the slightest."

I suspect that the number of people who's kink is to be utterly disregarded is somewhat small. Everyone wants something for their money usually.

_____________________________

pronounced "VROOick"

(in reply to domincalifornia)
Profile   Post #: 158
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 1:03:27 PM   
LiveSpark


Posts: 808
Joined: 12/25/2014
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ExiledTyrant


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Hotch, the trick is to always negotiate when she is bound and gagged. So if anything should become a problem you can say "You didn't mention that being a problem".

Jus sayin


That wouldn't work with me because the first thing we would be negotiating is being bound and gagged

Jus sayin

_____________________________

I've been here as MontrealPhoenix, zephyr and
TheFireWithinMe.

I also have the sarcasm gene which is NOT to be taken seriously.

If you fall I'll always be there to catch you ~ Floor

(in reply to ExiledTyrant)
Profile   Post #: 159
RE: Deleted Unread - 1/6/2015 1:21:28 PM   
LiveSpark


Posts: 808
Joined: 12/25/2014
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark


quote:

ORIGINAL: Hotch


quote:

ORIGINAL: LiveSpark

I also have a fairly detailed profile so those messages asking me what I'm looking for will show as deleted unread because it's clear they didn't bother to read my profile. BTW one dom-type wrote to say I'm "awfully picky for a sub" lol. Yep deleted.


Ewww... Nothing worse than a "picky sub". That is a sure fire way to have your wife beater wearin' omnipotence brought into question.



Well that's you eliminated from the list of potentials. Thanks for playing.


Oh well, you sound like too much work anyway. Anyone more intelligent than meatloaf is exhausting to deal with.



Ah so you're not looking for an actual human being. That definitely leaves you out.

_____________________________

I've been here as MontrealPhoenix, zephyr and
TheFireWithinMe.

I also have the sarcasm gene which is NOT to be taken seriously.

If you fall I'll always be there to catch you ~ Floor

(in reply to Hotch)
Profile   Post #: 160
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