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When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:00:33 PM

TigerBDSM

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Been on CS/CM almost from the beginning. For those who have been on for awhile, when did rude replies become acceptable? !
I view myself as very cordial, yes a dominant man with decades of experience, but never rude. I see, read and hear very rude remarks from newbies. Is this their BDSM?

Post #: 1

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:27:46 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

Thanks for your post.

My own viewpoint is that the Message Boards on this site became rude right about 2011. Perhaps i should say 2010, because a lot of great Dommes disappeared than. But i think the rest left with the CM/CS change over.

If you use Yahoo search ...you will know what I mean.

_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to TigerBDSM)

Post #: 2

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:31:58 PM

TigerBDSM

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Thanks. My orginal point of view is people in general. Either face to face at gatherings, or in reply to an email.

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

Post #: 3

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:38:05 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

Same time frame ... check it yourself.

_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to TigerBDSM)

Post #: 4

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:39:30 PM

TigerBDSM

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Again thanks

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I start and reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

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Post #: 5

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:40:23 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

And right about when FOX News became popular ... if you follow stocks, you know rude and lies are part of the marketing strategy.

_____________________________

Got my second paddle! Finally! :-)

Heck I had one in 2010 .. now in 2013 another! Yes you can say, i am just a gifted slow learner!

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

Post #: 6

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 8:43:07 PM

TigerBDSM

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Made my living for over 3 years on the market.

_____________________________

I start and reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

Post #: 7

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 10:08:10 PM

seekingreality

Posts: 599
Joined: 8/11/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigerBDSM

Been on CS/CM almost from the beginning. For those who have been on for awhile, when did rude replies become acceptable? !
I view myself as very cordial, yes a dominant man with decades of experience, but never rude. I see, read and hear very rude remarks from newbies. Is this their BDSM?

You're talking in vague, sweeping generalizations but ... In terms of personal emails, I find very few people rude ... If you mean in public forums like this, sure, there are lots of rude people ... but there are lots of people who come to the Internet to vent ... I don't think that has anything to do with BDSM... If I am misinterpreting what you mean, feel free to reload, be more specific and try again....

(in reply to TigerBDSM)

Post #: 8

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/18/2015 10:46:49 PM

HoneyBears

Posts: 337
Joined: 11/5/2013
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: seekingreality

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigerBDSM

Been on CS/CM almost from the beginning. For those who have been on for awhile, when did rude replies become acceptable? !
I view myself as very cordial, yes a dominant man with decades of experience, but never rude. I see, read and hear very rude remarks from newbies. Is this their BDSM?

You're talking in vague, sweeping generalizations but ... In terms of personal emails, I find very few people rude ... If you mean in public forums like this, sure, there are lots of rude people ... but there are lots of people who come to the Internet to vent ... I don't think that has anything to do with BDSM... If I am misinterpreting what you mean, feel free to reload, be more specific and try again....

We were also wondering the same thing and assumed you meant replies to messages on the profile side. You would have to be more specific about that, too, because we have no idea what's in your contact messages and what you consider to be a rude response.

Many men on this site find no response to be rude, forgetting that their messages are unsolicited and often target women who have made it clear in their profiles that you (generally speaking) don't meet their specs.

On sites where females are outnumbered and frequently receive inappropriate, off-the-wall messages - many of which are mass-mailed to them without any degree of personalization - one can hardly expect to receive individual responses in return.

_____________________________

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Post #: 9

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 6:48:22 AM

angelikaJ

Posts: 8641
Joined: 6/22/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TigerBDSM

Been on CS/CM almost from the beginning. For those who have been on for awhile, when did rude replies become acceptable? !
I view myself as very cordial, yes a dominant man with decades of experience, but never rude. I see, read and hear very rude remarks from newbies. Is this their BDSM?

Presuming that they are new, they may not know better.
Or they may know, given your detailed profile, that they have nothing to offer you and are just very efficient in conveying that.

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(in reply to TigerBDSM)

Post #: 10

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 6:59:57 AM

Spiritedsub2

Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline

Fr

I have frequently found that being uninterested in a man who messages me is interpreted as rudeness by the man. There is a weird "dynamic" on this site whereby male strangers who label themselves "dominant" then assume they are entitled to a degree of responsiveness from the submissive women they randomly message and call a woman rude when she doesn't provide them that. Very common behavioral pattern here.

I don't know if that is the situation with this OP.

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Post #: 11

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 7:13:33 AM

Musicmystery

Posts: 30259
Joined: 3/14/2005
Status: offline

It's a wider trend -- disagreeing with someone generally in our culture has become labelled "rude."

That's self-serving bullshit, of course, but increasingly common.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 12

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 7:22:29 AM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

Being rude online is commonplace.

Why you think this is relegated to BDSM or newbies is puzzling.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 9/19/2015 7:28:38 AM >

(in reply to Musicmystery)

Post #: 13

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 10:48:35 AM

ilovestarbucks

Posts: 86
Joined: 9/12/2015
Status: offline

My grandmother used to be a cashier at Stater Bros. She said that in the 80's & 90's there were plenty of rude people with short fuses. However, after they were rude they often would come back in and apologize. "Hey, I'm sorry I was rude but I've had such a rough day. Sorry." However, around year 2000 it all changed. So many rude people and no one comes in to apologize anymore.

(in reply to sexyred1)

Post #: 14

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 11:29:50 AM

LadyBerry

Posts: 39
Joined: 9/7/2015
From: Oregon
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

Fr

I have frequently found that being uninterested in a man who messages me is interpreted as rudeness by the man. There is a weird "dynamic" on this site whereby male strangers who label themselves "dominant" then assume they are entitled to a degree of responsiveness from the submissive women they randomly message and call a woman rude when she doesn't provide them that. Very common behavioral pattern here.

I don't know if that is the situation with this OP.

I can tell you that the same dynamic is present in a not-insignificant portion of the "submissive" men who message me.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 15

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 12:11:17 PM

OSGRedux

Posts: 21
Joined: 9/17/2015
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

Fr

I have frequently found that being uninterested in a man who messages me is interpreted as rudeness by the man. There is a weird "dynamic" on this site whereby male strangers who label themselves "dominant" then assume they are entitled to a degree of responsiveness from the submissive women they randomly message and call a woman rude when she doesn't provide them that. Very common behavioral pattern here.

Very much this.

My profile says "Just here for the forums"

I get an email "Not looking for play? I live in <town next to me>"

I respond, "Just here for the forums" seems pretty self explanatory"

I get called a rude bitch.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 16

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 12:46:19 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

The fact that your expectation is that every sub will kowtow to you because you chose dominant from a drop down memo is your fault. It doesn't obligate any of us to do so.

If you don't read a profile and listen when it says no one over 30, and you assume that because you're so special, it shouldn't apply to you, again that's your fault.

If you ask for advice here, expect to get that, not hand holding. Mollycoddling people doesn't teach them anything. Blunt cold truths may.

However, feel free to label me rude because you didn't get the answer you were looking for.

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Post #: 17

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/19/2015 2:15:32 PM

TigerBDSM

Posts: 40
Joined: 7/30/2004
Status: offline

Thanks to everyone.

_____________________________

I start and reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

(in reply to TigerBDSM)

Post #: 18

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/20/2015 1:59:49 PM

Killerangel

Posts: 1169
Joined: 8/3/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

Fr

I have frequently found that being uninterested in a man who messages me is interpreted as rudeness by the man. There is a weird "dynamic" on this site whereby male strangers who label themselves "dominant" then assume they are entitled to a degree of responsiveness from the submissive women they randomly message and call a woman rude when she doesn't provide them that. Very common behavioral pattern here.

I don't know if that is the situation with this OP.

This x 1,000.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 19

RE: When did rude become acceptable? - 9/21/2015 6:28:53 PM

crumpets

Posts: 1614
Joined: 11/5/2014
From: South Bay (SF & Silicon Valley)
Status: offline

I realize the OP is trying extremely hard to be super polite, but, I find the profile picture to be rude, in effect (and probably even against the TOS).

(in reply to Killerangel)

Post #: 20

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