Are you a slave are a submissive?

Are you a slave are a submissive? (Full Version)

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chattelmansub -> Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/9/2015 11:05:15 PM)
Whichever you are please define exactly what either of those terms mean to you and are they interchangeable are separate servile descriptive terms?

stef -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 12:11:44 AM)
No.

Kana -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 12:44:05 AM)
Nothing and no

peppermint -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 7:21:22 AM)
There is nothing exact about it.

spellslave -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 8:03:31 AM)
I am a submissive because I often take that role socially and sexually. Pair that with a hint of pet/primal behaviour. I am a slave, only to my partner-owner. I am his, to order as he wishes, within the limits we have agreed on.

Bunnicula -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 10:03:22 AM)
I'm a slave to my Master and to him alone. Everyone else wearing the 'dominant' badge can go take a long walk off a short pier. Our definition involves a lot of detailed discussions about limits, aligning our limits and agreeing on taking responsibility for each of our parts in the relationship. I have

Bunnicula -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 11:10:22 AM)
Random word excision from the end of the last post! What I meant to say was... I have no interest at all in anyone else's opinion on my definition of my role, my Master's definition of my role and his role, and their view of my relationship.

spellslave -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/10/2015 11:52:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bunnicula Random word excision from the end of the last post! What I meant to say was... I have no interest at all in anyone else's opinion on my definition of my role, my Master's definition of my role and his role, and their view of my relationship. If there was some way to 'like' this post, I would.

wannapleez -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/11/2015 6:50:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: spellslave I am a submissive because I often take that role socially and sexually. Pair that with a hint of pet/primal behaviour. I am a slave, only to my partner-owner. I am his, to order as he wishes, within the limits we have agreed on. While I respect and appreciate this distinction, I'd fine-tune it for myself. I will be a submissive and/or slave to any woman, but only if I choose to put myself in that position. Case in point: One Mistress I had was polyamorous. One time when I went to her house, she had another sub with her. He tried to tell me what to do, and I would have none of it. His gender did not play into that decision; it was simply because he wasn't my Dom or Master or anything. He was just a random schmuck to me. This means that I may have multiple partners (as long as they are all cool with the polyamory) and "partner" is defined loosely. It probably contains some naughty element, but doesn't have to. Further, in any such relationship, either "slave" or "submissive" might apply. Even then, I wouldn't necessarily call them "interchangeable", but more so individually applicable based on the relationship and/or the activities being performed by one or both of us. To be clear, this is my own personal position. The only thing that I'll say about anyone else's position is this: if they say that their position is definitive and universal, they're full of shit.

wannapleez -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/11/2015 6:51:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Bunnicula I have no interest at all in anyone else's opinion on my definition of my role, my Master's definition of my role and his role, and their view of my relationship. So did you just comment to tell us that you weren't going to comment?

Bunnicula -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/11/2015 11:32:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez So did you just comment to tell us that you weren't going to comment? no

DesFIP -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/11/2015 12:51:05 PM)
Like the bunny, I'm not an anything. I'm his something. And that's a totally different kettle of fish.

MoxieMcfly -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/12/2015 6:46:14 PM)
I think of submissive as more of a personality trait than a role or dynamic. Many relationships both inside and outside of this subculture, have one partner who is more dominant and one who is more submissive. I think of Master (or Mistress) / slave as being a specific type of relationship inspired by historical slavery. (But that is just me and my idea of it.) Personally, I have my own terms I use such as houseboy/girl, sissy maid, servant, pet, doll, property, personal assistant, etc. I like terms that speak to the specifics of what I am seeking.

littleclip -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/13/2015 5:55:52 AM)
I am service oriented I trust my owner with my life so I use the slave title but I am what my owner wants me to be

bduduty -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/13/2015 6:42:34 PM)
When I use the word "slave" I'm referring to someone who is in a position of absolute subservience to the will of a master with no consideration for their own preferences. A "live-in slave" is someone who is like this in all areas of their life. A "sexual slave" is someone who is like this only in the sexual areas of their life. When I use the word "submissive" I'm referring to someone who prefers a partner who takes control and makes the decisions (a "dominant"), but this is for the mutual satisfaction of both partners. A submissive does not stop having preferences in this type of relationship, it is just up to the dominant partner to decide where, when, and how those desires are expressed. For example, consider a traditional straight vanilla relationship. In this type of relationship, usually the man is dominant (takes control and makes the decisions), while the woman is submissive (lets the dominant male decide when/where/how her desires are expressed). However, in a traditional, straight, vanilla relationship, a man is not a "master" and a woman is not a "slave" as her preferences and desires are an important part of the equation. Since the original question called for me to say which one I personally am: I'm a bisexual switch that prefers being submissive. I prefer a dominant woman that tells me when and how to please her, and makes the decisions about when and how she is going to pleasure me.

DesFIP -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/13/2015 7:46:16 PM)
You're allowed to define words for yourself. However, since the rest of us don't share your definition, what's important is that you don't stop with just giving the label. You need to define it for potential partners. Me? I define sub as someone who has turned over authority in certain negotiated arenas of his or her life. Slave, someone who has turned over authority in all or almost all arenas. What you're missing in your definition is that many owners do take into account the preferences of their partners. Because that's what people who love each other do. So The Man isn't going to demand I go to a horror flick festival since he knows I won't sleep as a result. And since he cares about me, he's not going to demand things that will give me anxiety attacks. That's him making the decision to take my preferences and well being into account. And thus, when I demur going to a movie, I'm doing so with the authority he delegated to me. I said almost all since you can't turn over authority that others have over you or that you have over others, unless those others are capable of giving and do give informed consent. Meaning your owner can tell you to quit your job, but he can't tell you how to do it. Your manager is the only one with that authority. You can't, and shouldn't, give over authority over your children. Because they haven't accepted your new partner as a parent yet, and allowing the new partner to make decisions could well cause them major difficulties and that's wrong.

WickedsDesire -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/14/2015 9:03:21 AM)
I am muffin. But I am both slave and submissive to my cats

wannapleez -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/16/2015 10:14:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP You're allowed to define words for yourself. However, since the rest of us don't share your definition, what's important is that you don't stop with just giving the label. You need to define it for potential partners. This. This. 1000 times this.

seekingreality -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/16/2015 4:34:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: chattelmansub Whichever you are please define exactly what either of those terms mean to you and are they interchangeable are separate servile descriptive terms? The two terms have no exact meaning to me. I prefer just the generic description of "submissive" and I get into the specifics of my brand of it with people I want to share that information with. By and large, I find labels worthless because there is no agreed-upon definition of the labels.

dreamlady -> RE: Are you a slave are a submissive? (11/16/2015 8:05:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WickedsDesire But I am. . . submissive to my cats Hey, I know the feeling all too well. Ok, I won't lie. Those furry little rascals have cuteness factor multiplied to the umpteenth power, and I cannot resist. Their other currency is lots of blinky kisses and snuggly lap-kittiness. They pretend I'm their Owner and they pretend to not understand a word of English, like they suddenly turned into Chinese-language cats. DreamLady

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