RE: Double Standards

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CaptR -> RE: Double Standards (1/15/2016 6:21:44 PM)
Sensitivities obviously effect both genders as well as transgendered. Weight, height, skin color, the list is arguably endless. These days everyone is sensitive to something feeling obligated to cry out "My feelings are hurt!" She doesn't like short/ older/younger men, he doesn't like overweight/tall/ older women (pick your description) and vice versa. He sat in a rocking chair in a room full of long tail cats tossing out the "weight card" true enough but if you're going to call the guy out on anything let it be his lack of diplomacy/ tact. I would suggest if weight is a discussion point substitute it with "fitness level" next time. Everyone has their idea of a perfect partner and bet your ass it'll offend someone somehow somewhere in this "sensitive" society.

ilovestarbucks -> RE: Double Standards (1/15/2016 6:23:20 PM)
u know it seems like everyone has double standards. im not sure what the op is trying to say. is he saying no one should have dbl standards? or is he just complaining about life?

Lucylastic -> RE: Double Standards (1/15/2016 6:25:34 PM)
he doesnt like fat chicks, yet he is always looking for one, then he comes here to whinge about his lack of success, altho given this last , ahem "event" was an idea from a text meme(like damnyouautocorrect) I think he is just looking for attention or humiliation.

CaptR -> RE: Double Standards (1/15/2016 6:27:55 PM)
Apologies to LL. My old eyes and large fingers have once again picked the wrong "reply" button.

Lucylastic -> RE: Double Standards (1/15/2016 6:28:29 PM)
No worries Capt, it happens:)

Wayward5oul -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 6:56:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact quote: ORIGINAL: FelineRanger So what's the problem with someone else applying a similar double standard? From me? None. Personally, I have to go with a person can have any dating preferences that they want. At the same time, if a person is going to have a rigid preference, they also have to accept that it may reduce the number of folks in the dating pool. That's kinda what I was thinking. We all have our preferences. Nothing wrong with that. I don't like blondes. Nothing wrong with them. Could easily name a few that I would consider 'aesthetically pleasing'. But in terms of sexual attraction, I end up just looking right past them. I'm not a size 6. To some men that's a dealbreaker. No skin off my nose. To each their own. No need to go running around crying about it.

SWForidaDom -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 10:00:10 AM)
I think someone who specifies superficial requirements like height, weight, hair color, race etc shouldn't be upset when they get asked about superficial issues themselves. I understand that some people can't get past those unimportant things when looking for bdsm partners, I just know that anyone who can't look past superficial things probably can't get to the dept of the Master/slave dynamic that I require and that is my 'superficial' thing. No judgement about that, it just is what it is, we all have our issues.

Awareness -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 10:20:11 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl And once again, another rant about overweight women. Actually, it's a rant about female hypocrisy - but nice try at playing the victim.

Awareness -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 10:21:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MissKatya Orrrrrr.....dating men shorter than her has lead to awkward and uncomfortable situations so she is opting to avoid that. Men tend to be very fragile when they are shorter than their dates. Something about being emasculated, blah, blah, blah. I'm sure you're familiar with that feeling so the fact that she was trying to avoid damaging your already fragile ego was very thoughtful of her. So her shitty personality is men's fault. Ah, women - when will you start taking responsibility for yourselves.

Awareness -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 10:28:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl The reality is that while the OP may sexually desire females, he doesn't like them. It's evidenced in every post he's made: Women are rude, women have double standards, women don't listen, women listen better when they're punched. Yes and going by your posts, we could conclude the same thing about you and men. In fact, we could conclude that from a variety of the regulars here. You don't really seem to like men unless they're weak and fluffy or chronic attention-whores who kiss your ass. What was that about double standards again?

LadyPact -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 10:33:09 AM)
<Fast reply.> This is kind of why I mentioned the gal I knew from years ago. I saw it as a double standard that she, as a bisexual herself, would not date bisexual men. (Of course, she's allowed to decide who she wants to date or not. That's aside from the point.) She also had her height requirement. That disappointed a few men and some of them were kind of vocal about it. The question that follows is, if you are equating two entirely different things, is that being on a fair playing field? For example, a guy only wants to date athletic women and the woman he's interested in is concerned with the size of his bank account. (That one tends to irritate certain men, so I'm going for it.) What is superficial compared to status? What about submissives who may be new to BDSM only wanting experienced partners? People with education requirements that far exceed their own? (Just trying to encourage conversation because anything is better than team sock puppet.)

Awareness -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 11:06:13 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact <Fast reply.> This is kind of why I mentioned the gal I knew from years ago. I saw it as a double standard that she, as a bisexual herself, would not date bisexual men. (Of course, she's allowed to decide who she wants to date or not. That's aside from the point.) She also had her height requirement. That disappointed a few men and some of them were kind of vocal about it. I've run into that quite a few times. Bisexual women who - like a fair amount of heterosexual women - feel that bisexuality compromises a guy's masculinity. I never real thought of it as a double-standard - although it is - since from my perspective it reduces the number of potential competitors and that's advantageous to me. Bitching about someone's choice is weak. Regardless of what kind of interaction occurs between myself and a woman, my personal attitude is to attempt to behave with dignity. And believe me, I've had some significant provocation. Women, when rejected - either initially or later on - certainly behave every bit as badly as men do. Men will abuse you privately - women will try and abuse you publicly. quote: The question that follows is, if you are equating two entirely different things, is that being on a fair playing field? For example, a guy only wants to date athletic women and the woman he's interested in is concerned with the size of his bank account. (That one tends to irritate certain men, so I'm going for it.) If a woman's primary concern is his bank account, then he knows he's buying a whore - and it's up to him to decide if he wants to engage with that or not. To a certain extent, men and women follow their evolutionary pathways toward success. Men look for physiological markers of health and fertility. What we deem 'attractive' is a combination of those markers which indicate a probability of good genes. To a certain extent, women will look for the same thing, but seem more hardwired to seek men with social dominance and aggression - as these indicate a probability of ensuring her offspring's survival. quote: What is superficial compared to status? What about submissives who may be new to BDSM only wanting experienced partners? People with education requirements that far exceed their own? Online, everything is superficial, because attraction is dictated by our real-time interactions with the person walking, talking, gesturing and being smelt by us. (Pheromonal attraction is relevant here). When you say "submissives" and "people", I read "women". First, because the majority of women enjoy having a guy to look up to. One who can teach them. And secondly because male submissives don't really have much of a fucking option. They're exceedingly fortunate to get any play, let alone turning it away from women with insufficient experience or education (the silly little teen and 20's "prodomme" blood-suckers excepted). I don't necessary find these things shallow, I just think a lot of people on both sides are turning away others who they'd probably really enjoy. Primarily because online interaction provides such a facile view of who someone is, but also because online interaction gives the illusion of a buffet of options. Whereas in truth it's more about sorting the wheat from the chaff - and frankly, most people are incredibly unskilled at doing so.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 1:28:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom quote: ORIGINAL: OsideGirl So, I wonder how the OP would have felt if the woman in question had asked him about his income, account balance or credit rating. I'm getting the impression that you don't grasp what "double standards" are. Let me give you an example. 1a. A married woman does not have a job because she feels that it is the mans place to support his family and survives on his paycheck. ACCEPTABLE 1b. A married man does not have a job because he feels that it is the woman's place to support her family and survives on her paycheck. LABLED AS AN ABUSIVE HUSBAND WHO TAKES ADVANTAGE OF HIS WIFE Are you able to grasp this? If not, I'll give more examples. Try moving out of the 50's dear, but your grasp on reality is not that great

JanahX -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 1:31:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stef quote: ORIGINAL: MuscleBoundDom Both men and women are accused of double standards. I was texting with a woman and she wanted to know how tall I was. I told her 6'. She said that is acceptable. She is 5' 11" so she only wants to date men who are 6' or taller. I asked her how much does she weigh? She said, "What!?" I told her when she gets on the scale, what is the digital number that appears? She told me I'm rude and shallow - what does weight have anything to do with anything? I told her I'm fit so I want to only date fit women. She then cussed me out. You sure do whine a lot for a "dom", MuscleHead. RIGHT? I'm betting he's one of those guys that has over 300 selfies on his f.b. page. Kissing his abs... making love to the mirror.

blackgirls -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 11:24:20 PM)
I like large women because they are more comfortable to lie on and have more to hold onto when one is pumping pussy. Sadly too most women go off sex far too quickly. Most men still want intercourse from puberty to senility. When a woman have lasting monogamous relationships with men they must realize that intercourse is important to a man and that rationing or denying it does not keep a relationship sustainable. Even the domme women have the urge for motherhood unless frigid are lesbian. Semen is good for the vagina and it is were nature intended ejeculated semen to be stored. The vagina is the natural home of the penis.

blackgirls -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 11:40:09 PM)
Kiss kiss, puss puss, osidegirl let's your husband I and you go riding together? Yssssou would make a great pony slave girl when not engaged in obnoxious and power crazy misconduct. lady Pact and Lucylastic can join you and it would be good to see you harnessed naked together, 6 bouncing breasts as you trotted along and all different shapes and sizes. Then a vigorous roughriding pussy pumping session mounting each mare in turn to reward all the hard work pulling men around private grounds who all have randy erect cocks and semen to ejeculate into the pussy. Giddy up girl, trot on.

Greta75 -> RE: Double Standards (1/16/2016 11:46:18 PM)
quote: I think someone who specifies superficial requirements like height, weight, hair color, race etc shouldn't be upset when they get asked about superficial issues themselves. I 100% agree. I'm one of those who have very specific height and weight requirements. As I like tall and heavy men. I have a soft hair colour preference as I like black hair. Don't have an eye colour preference, but will go crazy for emerald green. I think a Pakistani girlfriend of mine must have been wearing contacts, but I remembered vividly, her eyes were beautiful, absolutely gorgeous. Emerald green. Sometimes she's hazel, but she swears the hazel were the contacts and her green eyes were the original, so I don't know. That was the moment I fell inlove with emerald green eyes. And I always say to men, I'm an overweight UK size 12. Most women here are UK size 4 and below. So being three times bigger than regular women here, I am the elephant. So usually I tell the men straight that if I am too fat, please walk away from me now! And let's not continue this conversation. Generally with 99.9% of local men, they wouldn't touch me with a ten foot pole, my weight disgusts them and that's their personal taste, because UK size 12 here is seen as obese. But that's why I always end up with Caucasian men, because they don't think I am overweight and actually find my size quite pleasant to look at. Also they tend to be bigger than me. Local men tend to be lighter and smaller than me. There will always be someone out there who likes the way you look. Just move along from those who don't appreciate your physicality and move on to those who do. quote: I understand that some people can't get past those unimportant things when looking for bdsm partners, I just know that anyone who can't look past superficial things probably can't get to the dept of the Master/slave dynamic that I require and that is my 'superficial' thing. I really don't believe in this. When one talks about physicality. It could be as basic as for example, not wanting to be someone half your height. Wanting someone with full functional limbs. Wanting someone who is not blind. All are physical abnormalities. We all have our standards. I think to say to have physical standards will take away from the depth of the relationship is ridiculous.

Greta75 -> RE: Double Standards (1/17/2016 12:00:29 AM)
quote: 1b. A married man does not have a job because he feels that it is the woman's place to support her family and survives on her paycheck. LABLED AS AN ABUSIVE HUSBAND WHO TAKES ADVANTAGE OF HIS WIFE The way you phrase this is so wrong. A married man does not have a job, because he married a woman with very ambitious career ambition, and his willing to sacrifice his own career to take care of the children full time and allow his wife to chase her dream career! Such men are model men for career minded women. In my country, there are beginning to have more marriages like this, where women are becoming more ambitious, and marrying men with lower ambition, so the man can quit his job, take over care of his children, and let his wife focus on her career. These women gets the envy of some of their friends, because, she has a loving husband at home, strong and secure enough to give up his job for her. And take away the burden of bringing up children from her. Some women really loves their job these days. And they need a supportive spouse to allow her to excel in her job without distractions. We also have divorces in such marriages, and the man gets custody, child support, as well as maintenance. No double standard. It's all very fair. If the dude is the house husband, there is no way the woman is getting custody. There would be enough damning evidence that she's too absorb with work to care properly for the kids. And I challenge any man to juggle 3 kids and housework. 24/7 job. Most men will find it more difficult than their day jobs. So kudos to any man willing to do this job. Find a woman who is obsess with her career, she will love you for wanting to stay at home and just take care of her needs and her family needs.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Double Standards (1/17/2016 1:52:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: So, I wonder how the OP would have felt if the woman in question had asked him about his income, account balance or credit rating. I would indeed think that I have some hideous sort of woman on my hands should she ask questions of that nature. It would instantly trigger that feeling of 'You need to find a different sort of man entirely, because your idea of a relationship is anathema to me'. Like it or not, women are measured by the size of our bodies and men by the size of their wallets / how far they are up the hierarchy (whatever the hierarchy is). Your response is most likely along the same lines as a woman has about the weight / size question. warmly, sunshine

PeonForHer -> RE: Double Standards (1/17/2016 4:17:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: So, I wonder how the OP would have felt if the woman in question had asked him about his income, account balance or credit rating. I would indeed think that I have some hideous sort of woman on my hands should she ask questions of that nature. It would instantly trigger that feeling of 'You need to find a different sort of man entirely, because your idea of a relationship is anathema to me'. Like it or not, women are measured by the size of our bodies and men by the size of their wallets / how far they are up the hierarchy (whatever the hierarchy is). Your response is most likely along the same lines as a woman has about the weight / size question. warmly, sunshine (Hey Sunshine, nice to see you again! :-)) Ach, it's just not my world. I don't come into contact with wallet-lighteners. They simply aren't my type and, by now, I can recognise them just by the way they dress. They wouldn't go for me and I wouldn't go for them. Simples, really. Since I also have the odd brain cell, I've learned over the years not to ask directly about a woman's weight. Way, way too sensitive a matter. That's something I'll work out discreetly, by means of clues from her profile, and what she says to me. I think I've learned, over the years, what is and is not a sensitive matter to broach with women in general. (It'd take a particularly thick bloke to fail to realise that weight is a sensitive issue for women, I'd assume.) If a woman hadn't learned the equivalent re men, then that woman would not be for me. She'll be a bit stupid, or a bit nutty - and I don't deal with stupid or nutty women any more. That's all there is to it.

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