Cheating and Sex Addiction

Cheating and Sex Addiction (Full Version)

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Greta75 -> Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 9:50:34 PM)
I feel like it's a trend now that every cheating male is diagnosed with sex addiction. Just referring to Ozzy Osbourne recent cheating incident, and of course the infamous Tiger Woods. First of all, if one has a sex addiction, then why not keep having sex with wife? If that cannot happen because wife does not want sex. Then it's not a fucking sex addiction! That's deprivation of sex. Anyway, I am coming from an angle where I believe, as a female who thoroughly feels sex is an essential need in my life. And I am always straightforward with my men, honest, before we even start dating, that I believe either the guy fulfills my sexual needs, or I find it elsewhere. This is my character. I won't do it behind your back, but I will tell you that my needs are not met. And if you refuse to do anything about it, then I either seek your permission for an open relationship, OR I guess this relationship is not gonna work for me. Problem is, with alot of traditional relationship, I feel like, people still expect people to completely live without sex, IF they love their spouse enough, they shouldn't need sex at all. And then, now, to me, sex addiction is like a treatment for your desire for sex! Crazy!

HoneyBears -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 10:03:20 PM)
- FR - Have you considered the possibility that you might have a sex addiction? (No snark. You just posted that you masturbate during your restroom breaks at work.)

cloverodella -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 10:19:54 PM)
i was going to point out the same thing...

servantforuse -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 10:21:16 PM)
Didn't Bill Clinton say he was addicted to sex ? That pervert might soon be roaming the halls of the White House once again.

DaddySatyr -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 10:26:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: servantforuse Didn't Bill Clinton say he was addicted to sex ? That pervert might soon be roaming the halls of the White House once again. Notice the anti-Christ doesn't call Donald a "womanizer", anymore? Michael

OsideGirl -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 11:05:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HoneyBears - FR - Have you considered the possibility that you might have a sex addiction? (No snark. You just posted that you masturbate during your restroom breaks at work.) Agreed. When it starts controlling your relationships, it's a problem.

Dvr22999874 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 11:07:49 PM)
What's perverted about sex addiction and what did Bill Clinton do that doesn't happen a million times + a day on this ball of mud ? He got a blow job from a willing ( I suppose) female. How terrible. How disgusting. How perverted.

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 11:20:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 ...that I believe either the guy fulfills my sexual needs, or I find it elsewhere. This is my character. I think that makes you a very shallow person, Greta. Sex isn't the be-all and end-all of a relationship. If you honestly feel that sex is paramount, you have a problem. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Problem is, with alot of traditional relationship, I feel like, people still expect people to completely live without sex, IF they love their spouse enough, they shouldn't need sex at all. It's never a black/white situation like you paint it. A really good solid relationship doesn't replace sex but it certainly knocks it off the top perch. I think you are substituting sex for a decent relastionship because you've never had one. [sm=2cents.gif]

BrownEyedGirl45 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/5/2016 11:47:22 PM)
Oh, that bloody word "addiction". Sorry I emptied your bank account again and sold the kids games, but I have a gambling addiction! Sorry I spent all the grocery money on crates of beer, then treated you like crap all evening but I have an alcohol addiction! Sorry I slept with the babysitter and hit on your sister, but I have a sex addiction! Oh bugger off, lol. Seriously. Go whine somewhere else. There is NO excuse for cheating. No excuse for any of those things. Ever.

itsSIRtou -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 2:12:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BrownEyedGirl45 Oh, that bloody word "addiction". Sorry I emptied your bank account again and sold the kids games, but I have a gambling addiction! Sorry I spent all the grocery money on crates of beer, then treated you like crap all evening but I have an alcohol addiction! Sorry I slept with the babysitter and hit on your sister, but I have a sex addiction! Oh bugger off, lol. Seriously. Go whine somewhere else. There is NO excuse for cheating. No excuse for any of those things. Ever. (sarcasm alert!) oh bugger!!, sorry, I got repeatedly told and peer pressured into I can only have one significant other, fuck partner, or relationship at a time started by some religious order that cant follow its own rules (see child sexual abuse) or my own insecurity that Im "not enough" for that person ...or to do otherwise Im "cheating" and I cant stand or have simple empathy for anyone who doesn't, but I have a monogamy addiction!!! Oh bugger off, lol. Seriously. Go be judgmentally sucky somewhere else. There is NO excuse for being judgmentally sucky . No excuse for any of THAT thing. Ever. ( never mind addictions are a real problem for millions of human beings backed by decades of real research...) (end of sarcasm alert!)

Greta75 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 2:25:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1 I think that makes you a very shallow person, Greta. Yea, but I have so many male friends who I don't have sex with. And they would do anything for me, and I would do anything for them. So to me, the only point of a husband, is SEX! Otherwise, His just like my brother. What is the differentiating thing between a male spouse and a brother, IF there is no sex? Please explain to me. I sleep with my male best friends and brothers on the same bed without sex, we can live together in harmony without sex, we can love and be there for each other without sex. But It's not romantic because THERE IS NO SEX! I grew up sharing a bedroom with my brothers, we sleep on the same bed. So to me, they do everything husbands do for me, except they don't have sex with me. Thus to me, a husband must have a sexual relationship with me. They are there for me when I need help, they are there for me when I cry. They take care of me when I am ill. They are like, just husbands without sex to me. So I don't need a husband for that. I got brothers, and I got male BFFs for that. To me the purpose of a spouse is to provide sex. I mean, after I divorced, my brother moved in with me, and took care of me, like he practically replaced my husband, EXCEPT he doesn't have sex with me. When ya brothers can do everything husbands do. You really need a husband who will have sex with you. Because my brothers come running whenever I call them for anything. They'd do anything for me. No husband will beat them in loving me. My cat died, they'll drop everything to make sure I am okay. Like I said my brother moved in with me to take care of me when I was going through my divorce, and only moved out after his absolutely sure I am okay. If I just need some manly handy man help at home, I just call my brothers and they are there. If i need company, if I am sad, if I need to talk, they are there. My male BFF is precisely that way too. He couldn't bare seeing me unhappy for anything, and he'll always be there. But he doesn't have sex with me, even though he could ha! So thus his not husband material. I feel like I have so many different men in my life fulfilling alot of things. I have people for support, I have people to talk to, I have people who will help me for like anything. And I have people for company, lots of platonic male company. The only thing missing in my life is a man who will be in my bed every night and have sex with me at the frequency I would like.

itsSIRtou -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 2:29:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DaddySatyr quote: ORIGINAL: servantforuse Didn't Bill Clinton say he was addicted to sex ? That pervert might soon be roaming the halls of the White House once again. Notice the anti-Christ doesn't call Donald a "womanizer", anymore? Michael notice after spending millions of taxpayer dollars going after a "womanizer" ....the gop has one for a candidate??

Greta75 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 2:47:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HoneyBears - FR - Have you considered the possibility that you might have a sex addiction? (No snark. You just posted that you masturbate during your restroom breaks at work.) No, because I am very disciplined about sex. There is nothing wrong in healthy masturbation in my private time. I like the sensation of cumming, it's relaxing, it's kegal exercises, keeps you tight, if you kegal together with it. And it's the most natural way of releasing happy endorphin and relaxing sensations. I often see it as a healthy thing, just that, people are soo taboo about it. I see it no different from stretching in between work. Some people choose to cat nap to relax if they work in companies with napping pods. I choose to masturbate to relax. But the thought of sex addiction is like, I would fuck anybody who wants to fuck, when I am the fussiest person and have very precise criteria on what I am looking for in fuck buddies, and will patiently not compromise and wait until a man fulfills ALL criteria. So I can live without sex for extended periods of time, with no urge to compromise on what I expect in a sexual partner. It also lead me to find my best sex, precisely the way I imagined perfect sex to be like. Patience and keep looking and do not settle. Just that unfortunately, his heavy traveling job cause him not to provide me with the frequency that suits me. And I bet Tiger Woods and Ozzy do not fuck just anybody who want to fuck them either. But they do have choices laid out there, I don't think they have sex addictions. They just have smorgasbord of temptations to choose from, and it takes very good self-discipline that I think with most ordinary men will find it hard to resist too, if hot young women keep pursuing and throwing themselves at them at the level that celebrities gets them.

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 3:04:20 AM)
Nice fielding. But with all your 'explanations' of how your life is, you are missing a major piece of life's puzzle. You put sex at the top of your list and won't compromise at all. You treat everyone around you like a friend or a commodity. From all of your posts, the missing thing is companionship, love, and togetherness. The feeling of wanting to be with someone just because it makes you feel good just to be with them. You seem to be completely devoid of personal passion. For you, if it doesn't have a specific purpose, you don't consider it. Everything is black and white with you. No wonder you are still single with nothing more than acquaintances to do jobs for you or fuck the living daylights out of you. You are a very cold person. Cold and calculating and to me, very selfish.

NookieNotes -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 3:38:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 quote: ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1 I think that makes you a very shallow person, Greta. Yea, but I have so many male friends who I don't have sex with. And they would do anything for me, and I would do anything for them. So to me, the only point of a husband, is SEX! Otherwise, His just like my brother. What is the differentiating thing between a male spouse and a brother, IF there is no sex? Please explain to me. I sleep with my male best friends and brothers on the same bed without sex, we can live together in harmony without sex, we can love and be there for each other without sex. But It's not romantic because THERE IS NO SEX! I get this. Sex, to me, is a very important indicator of a relationship. Not the only, but very important. If a relationship begins with excellent sex, and ends in a fizzle, there are usually many reasons that are not sex, but they show in the sex. A husband/BF is not only for sex, but I want my sex life with my primary to be the best I've ever had, and for it to be frequent. If it begins to slack off, I look to other aspects of the relationship which are likely faltering.

Greta75 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 3:45:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NookieNotes A husband/BF is not only for sex, but I want my sex life with my primary to be the best I've ever had, and for it to be frequent. If it begins to slack off, I look to other aspects of the relationship which are likely faltering. I see so many other areas of my life being completely fulfilled. The only thing missing in my life is regular sex at the frequency I would like it that would involve having a man permanently sharing a bed with me every night. Of course what makes that more difficult is, although I say "sex" generically but sexual compatibility is important. We also need to love the exact same things in sex. Otherwise, the sex is not enjoyable for me, then it may be me who doesn't want to have sex. Thus I still see that as the number 1 criteria. Because I believe, if sex is good, I will be happy, I can compromise on EVERYTHING else to make him happy. As long as his someone who is happy to have sex at a frequency I want. And I am straight forward and honest about it to any man I meet that I am interested in, because in relationships, it's important to want the same things and move in the same direction and be in the same wavelength. Especially after my divorce, my x-husband was my best friend and like everything to me. But after my divorce, I start meeting people who can be what my x-husband was to me, without any sex involve. And bonding with them, and I feel quite happy about that. All that is missing is the level of sexual connection and sexual frequency I want. Actually, the level of sexual connection I want is achieved. I have found it. Very happy about that. Now is looking for that, plus someone who is available for the frequency I need. That's why in many ways, I don't really need a spouse. I just need a long term regular fuck buddy who has the time and availability and who is interested in starting a family together with me. When it comes to children, everything goes out the window, their welfare is priority beyond our personal wants. That's standard procedure. Raising children will probably make frequency for sex difficult, but still, children grow up eventually, so it still needs to be a dude who wants as much sex as I do, so that when kids are more independent, we can go back to our frequency.

Greta75 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 4:02:54 AM)
quote: For you, if it doesn't have a specific purpose, you don't consider it. You mean you want to be with a woman who doesn't serve a specific purpose for you? Don't lie please. Your purpose may not be her sexual service to you, because you don't view that as important in a spouse. But I am sure your wife meets your needs, which are your specific purposes in what you want in a woman. Whatever they are. It's like basic functioning of life. Why do people do charity? The specific purpose is it makes them feel good about themselves that they are doing something to help society. That is a specific purpose. Everybody has specific purposes for everything. I am friends with someone because that person makes me feel happy and makes me laugh. That is a specific purpose. Most people will befriend people who make them feel good about themselves. People are also willing to do things for me, because obviously, I have done things for them when they needed me. It's all reciprocal. If there is one thing I think I am great at, I have been a damn great sister to my brothers and I am very proud of our dynamic because it's extremely loving towards each other. And their devotion to me, is highly commented by my friends who sometimes think my brothers act like my lovers. Being the eldest, I nurtured that lovey dovey relationship. I wanted a very close family, and my brothers were the first closest thing to me as family that I can control to make it my family, and alot of the dynamic, is nurtured since they were young, I gave them unconditionally, they gave me back unconditionally, since I cannot control my parents behaviour towards me. Like why would I be with a friend who constantly makes me unhappy? That would be associating with someone who does not serve any positive specific purpose to me. Its such a silly comment. Would you marry a woman who does not bring any positive things into your life? It's hypocritical to say, you don't practice the same things. Sex is not the only thing that could be a purpose. It could simply be how a person makes you feel. That is a purpose that person brings.

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 4:18:24 AM)
quote: When it starts controlling your relationships, it's a problem. I disagree, I wouldn't put up with a sexless relationship.

freedomdwarf1 -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 5:00:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 quote: For you, if it doesn't have a specific purpose, you don't consider it. You mean you want to be with a woman who doesn't serve a specific purpose for you? Don't lie please. Your purpose may not be her sexual service to you, because you don't view that as important in a spouse. Again, such a black and white PoV. I didn't say it wasn't important, just that it isn't the star at the top of tree. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 But I am sure your wife meets your needs, which are your specific purposes in what you want in a woman. Whatever they are. It's like basic functioning of life. Yes. And it's NOT centred around sex. There's a whole shedload of things that are just as important as sex. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Why do people do charity? The specific purpose is it makes them feel good about themselves that they are doing something to help society. That is a specific purpose. I don't do charity. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Everybody has specific purposes for everything. I disagree. I am with my partner just because I want to be with her. She brightens my day just by being there. This is something I don't get from your posts - you come across as cold. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 I am friends with someone because that person makes me feel happy and makes me laugh. That is a specific purpose. Most people will befriend people who make them feel good about themselves. People are also willing to do things for me, because obviously, I have done things for them when they needed me. It's all reciprocal. Tit-for-tat. Cold and calculating. quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Its such a silly comment. Would you marry a woman who does not bring any positive things into your life? It's hypocritical to say, you don't practice the same things. Sex is not the only thing that could be a purpose. It could simply be how a person makes you feel. That is a purpose that person brings. All I get from you is me-me-me. You sound like one of those people that give presents with the expectation of getting one back. I know someone like that. A very selfish person that I don't pass the time of day with if I can help it.

ThatDizzyChick -> RE: Cheating and Sex Addiction (8/6/2016 6:08:27 AM)
quote: There is NO excuse for being judgmentally sucky . No excuse for any of THAT thing. Ever. But what if they have an addiction to being judgmentally sucky?

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