LadyPact
Posts: 32566
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Potential trigger warning.
quote:
ORIGINAL: NookieNotes
I think it's utter shite. It's exclusionary and smacks of high school.
I go out of my way to teach people to interact better. I WANT people to learn how to connect with others. Most humans can only be their best human selves in connection with other humans they can learn from and grow with.
Give them the chance.
Many will not take it. And that's OK.
But to suggest that some people do not "deserve" to learn how to interact successfully? Ugh! What horrible snootiness. For shame.
I completely disagree with you and I've even got some reasons as to why I believe differently that you.
I feel that I should put the disclaimer in here that everybody, regardless of gender or role is going to get their share of crap email on the internet. The type might vary depending on the category a person happens to fall into but people know what type they get depending on who they are. If the implied genders of the original had been reversed, something along the lines of female Dominants initiating emails, wanted to be the Dominant of the male submissive they are writing, the high majority of the time, we know where this is going. It's about making somebody's wallet lighter, via (some) fin kink, pay for play, driving traffic to pay sites, and various other things. That makes it a very useful red flag.
The same happens to males on the other side of the slash that get emails from the hot looking young babe, who immediately say they want to 'serve' the male Dominant they are contacting. Again, high majority of the time, there is some angle coming that involves money. Transportation/relocation costs, pay off the "debt" to the former Master, hard luck stories, etc, etc. If I even said the words "Grapevine, Texas," all of the long term posters would be able to name <insert scam description here>. Again, very useful red flag.
Women, of course, are the receivers of different kinds of crap emails. Anybody can see this for themselves if they choose to have a look at the black and white site under that interesting group called "Return to Sender". Read the opening post of each thread for a few pages. I just did a test run on this and I came back with people who had abusive messages, racist slurs, proposition of gang bangs, (would you be willing to tease and service a room full of men) one who messaged the woman saying he would love to massage her udders, (in that terminology) and various other things. Thousands upon thousands of examples.
But, that's not the real story because the guys who send that crud via email are not living in an internet vacuum. High majority of the time, men DO know how to interact with women, start conversations, etc because men are our co-workers, neighbors, fellow participants in our kink communities, the guys who initiate conversations while standing in line at the grocery store and every other place that men and women interact in the face to face world. Some of them just CHOOSE not to act the same way they would in the real world because hey, it's the internet.
As a Dominant woman, I do get a certain kind of crud via email. It's never (or very rarely) anything that people say to me in person. General fantasy crap like they want to lick (slobber) on my shoes, or kinks they want me to do to them, or (the one that makes all roll our eyes) about how they want to "orally service" me for hours. We all know castration guy, trash bag guy, mosquito guy, cigarette burn guy, because these are the guys that spam darn near every woman on the site.
What I get as crap is nothing compared to what some submissive females get. The stuff I get is usually about what people want done to them as far as the "crud" category goes. The female s-types get the awful stuff that men tell them they specifically want to do to them. How they want to rape them, even writing out and sending the very detailed way about how they'll do it. Messages about how they (the male sending it) wants to mutilate the person. Let's not forget the emails that include the topics that aren't even permitted on the forums:
quote:
Subjects which are unacceptable regardless of circumstance include, but are not limited to - minors engaged in sexual activities, bestiality, incest involving minors, necrophilia, snuff and criminal activities
Those topics absolutely do show up in some of the female submissive's email.
When they get that stuff, no, I'm not going to encourage them to try to "teach them how to interact better". I'd rather see them report those type of emails to the site rather than try to interact with them because when those guys get a response, they keep doing it.
The discussions about emails that we have on the forums are always interesting. However, it's not often that it's the male members of the forums who actually NEED the pointers on how to send decent emails. A high percentage of the male Dominant forum participants are actually really nice guys. The problem tends to be that the other guys screw it up for them.
_____________________________
The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT
Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD
Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.
Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread
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RE: The order of things in online conversations as I se... - 
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