Kana
Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Greatlilbabygirl
Being active in the lifestyle for only a year now, I've struggled from the beginning to find my place, my niche in the wide world of kink. I know that PE is the most enticing and most comfortable aspect of BDSM that I've tried. I truly enjoyed the PE relationships and interactions I've had, but I've consistently ran into a wall. More experienced lifestylers have told me I'm not "a submissive" and I'm decidedly not dominant in bed or while scening. I don't naturally gravitate towards a Top role but conversely I don't fall easily into submission either.
I'm not a submissive but I long to submit. I'm not a Domme, I don't want to take control. I'm somewhere in between with no one to turn to and no hope of satisfaction and that more than depresses me. So what am I? It seems to matter to others when they talk to me, so I guess I must try and figure it out.
What are the possibilities? What questions or options do you think I haven't been asking myself or exploring? I need your seasoned, sage opinions and advice.
Thank you
Think less.
Do more.
For crying out loud, people make this waaaaaaaaaay to difficult, especially for some reason chicks.
Break things down.
People are ridiculous things, convoluted, creative, full of conflicting emotions, desires, virtues, vices, issues. They are freaking complicated. There ain't no label that can adequately define or capture the entirety of the complex thing that is a person.
You are a human being. So be.
Be in the act of being.
Life ain't an equation to be solved or a riddle to be answered, it's an experience to be indulged and savored.
Stop trying to be whatever.
Just be you.
That oh so simple to say and incredibly difficult task of just being the you you were created to be.
Find a Guy (Or a gal or a He/She or a Herm or a Dog as long as its over three, I don't care, whatever strikes your fancy) that has rocks in his head that fit the holes in yours. Find someone you click and mesh with.
Amazingly enough, when that happens, all these things people stew about labels, sub/slave, limits, all that crap, it tends to just disappear when the right person is there.
A final thought.
People change. We grow.
The person that you are now, that walks into an interaction now ain't gonna be the same person in a year or fie or ten. You'l be different. He'll be different. The ways you interact will be different, some voluntarily, some not so much.
That's life.
As for what others say, hmmmmmmm, all I'll say there, and that includes this little missive is, as always, consider the source. In the end, no one knows you like you do, and no one else can define or limit you or place labels on you unless you allow them to.
Just saying'
_____________________________
"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST
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RE: What am I? - 
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