Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance?

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Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/26/2006 8:23:21 AM

Shyamanty

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/3/2006
Status: offline

Hello.
This is my situation: in live in a country were this lifestyle is very hard to cultivate (pardon my lousy english, it's been years since I've last wrote something in this language) so it is very unlikely for me to find a mistress.

That leaves me with 2 options: move away (wich I can´t) or find a Mistress elsewhere.
Is an online Dom/sub relation possible? And how? Or is this simply impossible?

Post #: 1

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/26/2006 8:29:12 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Shyamanty

Hello.
This is my situation: in live in a country were this lifestyle is very hard to cultivate (pardon my lousy english, it's been years since I've last wrote something in this language) so it is very unlikely for me to find a mistress.

That leaves me with 2 options: move away (wich I can´t) or find a Mistress elsewhere.
Is an online Dom/sub relation possible? And how? Or is this simply impossible?

Some people have Ds relationships that are only online.

I did it once for over a year when I was just starting out -- I got lucky and the young man I had was complerely honest and himself which I discovered when we finally met face-to-face. It just isn't enough for me -- not enough return for the effort.

I personally don't want that so when someone writes to me who lives more than a few hours away I always say "I'm in into online or long distance relationships.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 2

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/26/2006 8:35:28 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Shyamanty

Hello.
This is my situation: in live in a country were this lifestyle is very hard to cultivate (pardon my lousy english, it's been years since I've last wrote something in this language) so it is very unlikely for me to find a mistress.

That leaves me with 2 options: move away (wich I can´t) or find a Mistress elsewhere.
Is an online Dom/sub relation possible? And how? Or is this simply impossible?

It's not impossible. Be open and honest with what you seek (reality vs. fantasy) and reach out to those who say they seek an online relationship. Please don't target people seeking RT relationships who are not within your means of getting to travelwise or through moving. Doing that sort of thing is disrespectful of other's time and shows you're more interested in what you're after rather than being sensitive to their needs as well.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 3

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/26/2006 8:47:45 AM

Shyamanty

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/3/2006
Status: offline

Thank you the kind and quick answers.

(in reply to MisPandora)

Post #: 4

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/26/2006 12:31:31 PM

crouchingtigress

Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline

D-life is as real or as surreal as you wish to make it...imo..

i have had incredible, powerful, humbling experiences on-line but once i moved to r/l it was hard to re-create that on line

_____________________________

Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 5

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/27/2006 7:02:48 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

It is possible though it is not nearly as fulfilling (IMO) as real life. Good luck, though. Maybe you will stumble across someone unexpectedly

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 6

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/27/2006 7:18:36 AM

subdi

Posts: 2
Joined: 7/27/2006
Status: offline

I am very new here and in a distance relationship with me in Australia and my much loved Dom in the USA. I have been collared for nearly a year now. Whilst it can never be as fulfilling as a r/t relationship it can work so very very well when the right one is found.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 7

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/27/2006 10:45:06 PM

coca

Posts: 53
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

if you ask this question to yourself how will you answer?

will you choose to have a relation in realtime or will you choose it online? i think the right answer is you have to live it , so that you can understand what you like , what you dont.
it is better when you are having in rt experience , it helps you to understand yourself..
but , if you dont have ANY chance to live it in real life.. So , everything is again up to you..

You have to answer , will you be satisfied as a sub to be dominated from a long distance? will you feel really that you are giving your owner yourself totaly or serving Her or Him.?
everything what you are doing or what you will do has a reason... it is simple : You are choosing what you want!

if you want to try the long distance D/s , try it... and try the best what you can...

regards
coca

(in reply to subdi)

Post #: 8

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 1:46:28 AM

Shyamanty

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/3/2006
Status: offline

Well, up 'till now (my english sucks, I know) all the answers have been useful to get me thinking.
I admit I would prefer a real-time, face to face, D/s relation but I'm stuck on this little place, tied with my job and other obligations (is it writen like this?

) and I just can´t pack up and go, leading to if want to be someone's sub/slave it will have to be on-line. Unless I get a HUGE lucky strike, wich I do not think so..
Bottom line, I'm just another mental case...

(in reply to coca)

Post #: 9

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 5:05:22 AM

totalservant

Posts: 32
Joined: 7/8/2005
Status: offline

now looking to your profile, I see you are living in portugal, I am sure there are many dommes in Portugal, Spain or France...hey Paris is only a few hrs driving away...So I dont see why your are limiting yourself to just cyber

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 10

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 8:13:18 AM

HarryVanWinkle

Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline

I just searched and and found thirteen Dominant Women's profiles in Portugal. Have you tried them?

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 11

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 8:22:25 AM

Shyamanty

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/3/2006
Status: offline

titleAndStar(25,0,0,false,"","")
Vanilla

Posts: 25
Joined: 7/8/2005
Status: offline

now looking to your profile, I see you are living in portugal, I am sure there are many dommes in Portugal, Spain or France...hey Paris is only a few hrs driving away...So I dont see why your are limiting yourself to just cyber

If it was that simple to find a Domme in Portugal, I would be asking a totally diferent question, believe me (not trying to be disrespectful)..
There are people in Portugal on follow BDSM as lifestyle,yes, but it is a very tightly knit circle (hope the phrase is well written!) and incredably hard to get in. If my purpose was to just "get off" once and a while, I would be looking for a pay-Domme, wich is something I do not want. I look for a commitment in a Master-servant bond, in friendship and respect, not market exchange. It's been really great having all this feedback to my post (a dumb one!) but as you can see, I'm on a thight spot!

(in reply to totalservant)

Post #: 12

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 10:46:51 PM

MasterWIL

Posts: 3
Joined: 7/28/2006
Status: offline

A couple of years ago. I would have said something quite negative on this subject. NOW, I can quite honestly say , I have experienced ( am experiencing ) a VERY fulfilling online D/s relationship.
I am not saying, it is without it's very real problems - but the person I backed into having the relationship I now have WITH , is priceless in what she brings into my life.

_____________________________

Best Regards,
Master WIL

*Integrity, is NOT a just word, or "old fashioned notion." - Yours Truly

"Do not go where the path my lead, but go where there is no path and leave a trail."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 13

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/28/2006 10:50:06 PM

MasterWIL

Posts: 3
Joined: 7/28/2006
Status: offline

PS....I may be new here, but I can assure all - I am NOT "Vanilla" !

_____________________________

Best Regards,
Master WIL

*Integrity, is NOT a just word, or "old fashioned notion." - Yours Truly

"Do not go where the path my lead, but go where there is no path and leave a trail."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

(in reply to MasterWIL)

Post #: 14

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 7/29/2006 6:11:48 PM

subdi

Posts: 2
Joined: 7/27/2006
Status: offline

You have to answer , will you be satisfied as a sub to be dominated from a long distance? will you feel really that you are giving your owner yourself totaly or serving Her or Him.?
everything what you are doing or what you will do has a reason... it is simple : You are choosing what you want!

Very true. Once you know within yourself what you need and want you can then try and find it. It also requires mindset for this to work well between you.
We found each other by accident, in another group and started chatting. I really can't remember how the topic even came up as we talked about anything and everything. So yes, you can get lucky.

but the person I backed into having the relationship I now have WITH , is priceless in what she brings into my life.

Thank you sir. You know the feeling it totally reciprocated.

(in reply to MasterWIL)

Post #: 15

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 8/3/2006 2:15:11 AM

Shyamanty

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/3/2006
Status: offline

I've had a luck strike and found myself a (somewhat) Mistress.

We've knowned each other for a long time and last week after a party (and to much wine; portuguese, strong good stuff, try it out!) during a LONG talk (and some more wine) at her home things got a litle nasty and we ended up in bed, where I confessed my taste for BDSM. She had never thought on it but got interested and decided she wanted to try it out. RESULT: can´t call her a true Mistress yet, but we are working on each other fast! Already bought a few toys, and we're going for the long road with each other.

It really seems somotimes miracles DO happen!

(in reply to subdi)

Post #: 16

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 8/3/2006 2:27:12 AM

Sylverdawn

Posts: 1123
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Congratulations. The joy is in the journey not in the destination and it sounds like your on quite the ride.

_____________________________

“When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.” Elyane Boosler

Being a women is hard work Maya Angelou

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 17

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 10/28/2006 12:02:11 PM

PrincessDonna

Posts: 189
Joined: 7/7/2006
Status: offline

I travel the west coast alot and have found that some subs find it erotic,never knowing when the mistress is going to show,and we do alot on web cam.Instructions are still instructions,and punishment is still just that! I have one that changes little things around in the house while I'm gone just to see if I'll notice when I get back that she did it without my permission,still a little insecure that one but shes breaking in well.

(in reply to Sylverdawn)

Post #: 18

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 10/28/2006 2:00:26 PM

submit2one

Posts: 26
Joined: 7/3/2005
Status: offline

Fascinating. A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, and a new toybox and Eureka!
Two New BDSM Stars are born!
ya, right.
s2one

quote:

ORIGINAL: Shyamanty

I've had a luck strike and found myself a (somewhat) Mistress.

We've knowned each other for a long time and last week after a party (and to much wine; portuguese, strong good stuff, try it out!) during a LONG talk (and some more wine) at her home things got a litle nasty and we ended up in bed, where I confessed my taste for BDSM. She had never thought on it but got interested and decided she wanted to try it out. RESULT: can´t call her a true Mistress yet, but we are working on each other fast! Already bought a few toys, and we're going for the long road with each other.

It really seems somotimes miracles DO happen!

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 19

RE: Is it possible to have a D/s relation by distance? - 10/28/2006 3:51:18 PM

LadyAlaria

Posts: 11
Joined: 7/22/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Shyamanty
Is an online Dom/sub relation possible? And how? Or is this simply impossible?

Yes it is possible although not the best way to experience a D/s relationship. Nothing compares with being face-to-face in a r/t environment. I am currently in a LDR out of necessity, definitely not by choice. To make it work, there is email, cam, online chats and phone with the possibility of visits. It takes a lot of patience and willingness on both parts to make it work and I wish you the best of luck!

Alaria

(in reply to Shyamanty)

Post #: 20

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