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Noah -> RE: How does a Dominant decide to be (or not) a Daddy Dom? (8/20/2006 9:53:29 PM)
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ORIGINAL: NastyDaddy
Thoughtful and well spoken commentary which seemed to wind up with a collective reasoning that one should not judge a book by its cover, that within the book may lie many-splendored things. This logic is universal is it not, and not associated merely with ''fluffy bunny'' and/or ''goo-goo ga-ga'' D/d roles as you referred to them.
I think so, yes.
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You seem to have linked D/d to D/s alone and used the example of a Master buying a slave to break her... or what-have you. I don't buy into the logic that D/d is limited to D/s pairings and does not or cannot entail M/s pairings. The success of any BDSM relationship, or pairing is limited only to the interactions of the pairing. Trying to establish formal doctrine and dress codes for any relationship is unimaginative at best, as interations in life are not merely all tailored scripted events...
I'm not sure why you imputed this linkage to D/S alone but I apologize for giving that impression. In fact one of the thoughts that motivated my post was that the strong emphasis on the Nurture and Protect in several posts here and elsewher might tend to obscure the possibility of D/d being as SM as you like. One slice of the many splendors you referred to.
D/s, S/M and D/d can surely come together in one relationship.
As to dress codes and stuff, I guess they would ony be imaginative in the cases where they were ... imaginative.
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One thing I've noticed is there seem to be fewer sadists and masochists within the realm of D/d on a whole. SM seems to be afforded ample opportunity of fluttering between M/s and D/s, not being linked specifically to either, while often SM enthusiasts seem prone to push or guide D/d away from what they may consider to be their home turf, whether it be M/s or D/s.
So I guess you and I have made some of the same observations, if what you are talking about are comments in venues like this. That said I don't put too much stock in my readings of these boards as statistically representative of what people are actually doing out there. I'mnot a big scenester and even someone intimately familiar with "the scene" in every corner of the would have from that limited insight into what those outside "the scene" care about and are doing. I'm sure lots of happy people are doing lots of interesting things and just not talking about it in places like this.
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Regarding filial relationship development, how can you propose that babygirls are created by a/the relationship... when many people naturaly identify in the role and seek their counterpart... sans any actual training or relationship conditioning, molding, breaking, etc. Who made who?
I'm sorry I wasn't more clear. Those comments addressed the nature of actual, real life, every day filial relationships. One is born into them, and then one's offspring are. And then there you are with a sort of permanent, immutable thing, unique in its givenness.
A BDSM relationship modeled in some way on an actual filial relationship could focus upon this or not focus upon it. I was pointing to it as an aspect that could set apart the D/d "role" relationship from any other role relationship which might or might not also prominently feature Nurturance and Protection.
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Daddy does not "make" a babygirl... he forms her from the potable clay she consists of... he shapes, molds and forms her under an umbrella of nurturing and protection. Her filial development is usually not of his doing... it comes from within the babygirl, not the Daddy who merely creates a nurturing and protective environment for her filial stage of development/predisposition to thrive and flourish.
The ds in D/d relationships (who may or may not identify whatsoever as "babygirls") are obviously not created by the relationship, but in the actual thing that is the model for this sort of role, the female person and the daughter role arise together and as apects of one another, rather completely and permanently entwined.
I think that in the end we are in pretty close agreement once things are sorted out. Thanks for posting.
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