RE: not obeying a mistress

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LadyEllen -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 4:58:56 AM)
shamed - OK, so it seems your hard limits would be physical discipline and humiliation? Why then are the following listed as "lives for" in your profile? - Canes & crops, whipping, face slapping, CBT (which all sound like things you dont like according to your posts here) + begging, humiliation (which again sound like things which you dont like according to your posts here). I'm confused. I also read in your profile text that you have been discharged by one Lady for posting here without permission? Are you sure that a lot of what you have written here is not from the basis of disappointment in being discharged by this Lady? Are you projecting that disappointment at all dominant Ladies? Are you feeling anger at your former Lady in the way that one might feel in a vanilla break up? I could understand it from that basis. E

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 5:56:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shamedmale And I dont know about you but any domme who has face slapping , whipping or spanking in his or her repertoire is not particularly worthy of respect in my view. As the incomparable Lady Ellen has pointed out - you have these listed on your own profile as part of your repetoire, so this statement is highly hypocritical. Both whipping and spanking are very popular among both submissives and Dominants, so much so I get emails on a regular basis asking for precisely such activities from males subs like yourself, and it's rare that I go to a BDSM party or club where someone does not ask me come up to me and request such activities. If corporal activities are so far beyond your scope to comprehend that those that engage in them might just find them enjoyable AND that <gasp> they can be done quite safely without any injury, then I suggest to you that perhaps you are entirely too close minded to get involved in this lifestyle. You will not find success in finding someone real who has not either done these activities or finds them intriguing to some level. You will not find success getting out and going to a party or a club to meet people only to condemn them for enjoying these activities - you will find yourself on the outisde very quickly with no chance of getting back in. quote: Certainly dommes who feel males are worms are not worthy of respect in my view. I mean would you like to be slapped around or referred to as a worm. In my view whether its male or female its quite offensive but thats just my view. As a matter of fact, quite a few enjoy just that. What of it? Once again, your OWN PROFILE indicates that ou are "worthless" i.e. not worthy of respect yourself. They don't have to be activities that interest you - that's why there's these things called "hard limits" (although if you are online only - I suppose that means you're just not interested in typing about them?). The problem with your view is that it's clear you haven't spent much time actually learning about all of this - if you had, you'd have seen that these are very popular, very safe, and widely engaged in activities.

shamedmale -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 6:00:37 AM)
i listed these interests over two years ago when i knew absolutely nothing about BDSM. i now know i only listed these because the fantasy of having these things done to me appealed but once the reality dawned closer i chickened out. i mean i could not in all reality stand the pain of being tortured whipped or face slapped.

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 6:04:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shamedmale i listed these interests over two years ago when i knew absolutely nothing about BDSM. i now know i only listed these because the fantasy of having these things done to me appealed but once the reality dawned closer i chickened out. i mean i could not in all reality stand the pain of being tortured whipped or face slapped. BOLLOCKS. You joined this site 5/15/06, not "over two years ago". Just because they don't appeal to you, how does that automatically make them "wrong" for everyone else? In that case, let's outlaw curry because frankly it's a flavor I just don't like, so clearly any of you who enjoy it are just wrong.

shamedmale -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 6:14:52 AM)
well it seems like 2 years its that long ago and by the way i changed the name of my profile just i was not always shamedmale i was a different name before that which i cant remember now. As for the lady who discharged me a woman of greater integrity and honesty i do not know. It was simply that i could not in all honesty be a slave to her in the way she requested, she may or may not invite me back probably as a citizen and not as a slave i was incredibly stupid got bored one day and ignorantly and stupidly posted something idiotic to another woman which the lady picked up on and i was rightly and justly dismissed

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 6:21:12 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: shamedmale well it seems like 2 years its that long ago and by the way i changed the name of my profile just i was not always shamedmale i was a different name before that which i cant remember now. As for the lady who discharged me a woman of greater integrity and honesty i do not know. It was simply that i could not in all honesty be a slave to her in the way she requested, she may or may not invite me back probably as a citizen and not as a slave i was incredibly stupid got bored one day and ignorantly and stupidly posted something idiotic to another woman which the lady picked up on and i was rightly and justly dismissed We're really not concerned about if you changed your name or not. The fact is those activities are listed NOW, TODAY in a profile that you opened less than six months ago, not over two years ago. And the way your profile is today indicates that you LIVE for these oh so disrespectful activities that you profess to think others are so disrepectable for enjoying. Pot. Meet Kettle.

LadyEllen -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 6:35:58 AM)
Ok shamed - describe for me your idea of your perfect relationship with the Domme of your dreams? I'm genuinely interested and also would like to understand you better. E

shamedmale -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 8:50:13 AM)
my philosophy is rather simple i would do tasks for a Domme much as I would do for anyone else like round the house tasks, housework, yard work, office duties that sort of thing but i would expect not to be asked to do humiliating or menial tasks, toilet training is a no no, face slapping is a no no cbt no no, what im saying basically is i would serve a dominant willingly and do it for nothing as long as respectable hours were kept not more than 9 hours per day for me but i dont subscribe to the idea that a woman is superior to me except in fantasy, in reality i would not like to serve a female supremacist, i wouldnt be into any punishments of any sort, after all on thinking about this im a human being not a dog not a worm not an inferior male, im actually a human being who needs love and affection much as anyone submissive or dominant would

shamedmale -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 8:54:19 AM)
Respectfully Lady Ellen none of this is relevant. I am NOT seeking anyone at this time. I am in actual fact going to serve the Lady who discharged me after a period of banishment but NOT in the manner I served before this. I will serve her should she so wish to accept me back. That is her prerogative. Meantime I do not seek anyone else. However I do thank you for your patience and support. It is much appreciated

LadyEllen -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 9:12:23 AM)
shamed - I wasnt cracking on to you or anything OK!? So, what I feel you want then is a mild D/s relationship? One in which you are the equal of the Lady, but happy to submit to her in that you wish to serve her because you love her and wish to please her? You value the value she places on you through her love and affection for you, and the only discipline element in the relationship would be her voiced or unvoiced disapproval of the tasks you performed, and consequent withdrawal of her love and affection because of her displeasure in the performance (rather than in you as a person)? If that be the case, then I would say you shouldnt have that many problems in fulfilling that kind of relationship within a fairly normal marriage. That seems to be the way that things work in many marriages I've seen - the wife withdraws her love in order to discipline the husband to her way of thinking. The husband is happy to do anything to show his love for his wife, and she is happy to have such a devoted husband willing to make her happy. If he doesnt do those things that make her happy, she becomes unhappy and he knows about it. The thing is, I wish you had said this stuff in the first place, rather than going on about all the stuff you dont like or want. Its fairly rare on here to come across a submissive male who knows what he wants, and doesnt claim to be something he isnt (ie no limits and all that stuff). Its OK to choose any flavour you want, you know? Not everyone likes all the flavours and some people like some flavours but not others - no one expects you or wants you to be anything that you arent, as that just wastes the time of anyone who might be interested in you based on what you say you want, when you dont want it at all really. There is no one, despite any protestations to the contrary, that has no limits. I suggest you rewrite your profile forthwith, and hope you will remain on the site and forums, as we could do with more people who know what they want, and know the difference between real life and fantasy! Good luck with your Lady too! E

shamedmale -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 1:31:48 PM)
and just for interest sake are you domme or switch, it says you are switch is that correct

LadyEllen -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 2:41:41 PM)
Hi shamed - I'm.........er........complicated! Yes - lets just say I switch E

damia -> RE: not obeying a mistress (11/5/2006 4:11:46 PM)
If She likes brats, then yea, go ahead and disobey (as long as it's not a rule that she's said not to disobey under no circumstances). A Dom/me who likes brats will, i think, tell their sub such as part of communication, and may even make hints at rules that are 'okay' to break. Like, maybe S/He says 'these are deal-breakers' (rules NEVER to be broken) and 'these will end in a very harsh punishment' (probably not a good idea to break these unless you want that extreme punishment). i talked to one sub (who is a brat) who once hid some of her Master's toys and told Him she thought they might play a game of Treasure Hunt. He went along with it, found all the toys, then proceeded to use them all on her, thus punishing her for her bratiness. my advice: don't disobey unless She likes it. A Dom/me who doesn't like a brat is going to punish a disobeying sub according to the contract whether they are new or not. If you are under a contract with a Mistress, you know the rules and have agreed to them. Don't break your promise to abide by them.

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