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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 9:52:40 AM   
Lordandmaster


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I KNOW that many people won't "support that stance."  I don't believe "ethics" means "sharing the beliefs of the majority."

See, I've already taken that course in ethics.  But you're missing one important point.  No one ever asked you to endorse what adult human beings do in the privacy of their own home--because, frankly, it's none of your business.  They teach that concept in those ethics classes, you know.  I'm a lot more concerned about people who think they have some kind of right or calling to dictate other people's relationships than I am about people who have unusual relationships.

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

Hey if you wanna support a post that implies it's not unhealthy for a slave to kill herself if her Master tells her too thats your perogative. i doubt many will support that stance.  i personally would hate a newbie reading posts here to get the impression slaves are mindless, self sacrificing, robots who obey irregardless of safety. i won't endorse it ever - if you do i feel sorry for you, you need a course in ethics.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 9:55:32 AM   
angelic


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~fast reply~ to no one in particular (really)... imo, there are things far worse than death.... i do not believe in the fairytale of 'no limits' slaves... just because your (generic usage here) Master hasn't/doesn't/would never... ask something of you, doesn't make you 'no limits'... it means (imo) that you definitely HAVE limits, and so does He. 

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:02:47 AM   
MistressDeAnnya


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In a word- "YES" they have rights. You dont wanna find yourself in a court of law explaining that you did something against someones will ..just cuz its BDSM. They wont buy it.
 
Best wishes,
Mistress DeAnnya

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:10:31 AM   
velvetears


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

I KNOW that many people won't "support that stance."  I don't believe "ethics" means "sharing the beliefs of the majority."

And who said i did?  Having ethics is dealing with values relating to human conduct, with respect to the rightness and wrongness of certain actions and to the goodness and badness of the motives and ends of such actions.

See, I've already taken that course in ethics.  But you're missing one important point.  No one ever asked you to endorse what adult human beings do in the privacy of their own home--because, frankly, it's none of your business.  They teach that concept in those ethics classes, you know.  I'm a lot more concerned about people who think they have some kind of right or calling to dictate other people's relationships than I am about people who have unusual relationships.

And asking a sub to kill herself is a far cry from having an unusual relationship.  It's wrong. You're just too concerned about being "politically correct" to take a stand, well don't, but don't put down others who have to courage to call a spade a spade. 



< Message edited by velvetears -- 9/4/2006 10:11:11 AM >


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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:12:56 AM   
Lordandmaster


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That's absurd.  I am taking a stand.  It happens to be a stand that you don't agree with.

See, you've been confusing "ethics" with "believing the things that I believe"; now you're confusing "courage" with "having the courage to say the things that I believe."

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

And asking a sub to kill herself is a far cry from having an unusual relationship.  It's wrong. You're just too concerned about being "politically correct" to take a stand, well don't, but don't put down others who have to courage to call a spade a spade. 

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:20:53 AM   
velvetears


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Someone should start a thread about the ethics or morality of slave being asked to kill herself for her Master and whether or not anyone outside of that relationship should step in and say it's wrong and not ethical.  i am done debating that here with you LaM - it's not what this thread really is about.  You have your views i have mine and never the twain shall meet.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:23:21 AM   
Lordandmaster


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OK, suppose we say that it's "wrong" for a master to tell his slave to kill herself.  Suppose we say that it's all right for outsiders to step in when a master does something "wrong."

What else is "wrong"?  Who decides what's "wrong"?

YOU?

I sure hope not.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:23:42 AM   
KnightofMists


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quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Any Person of any Orientation has the ability to say No.... The question is... does one wish to accept the Consequences of saying No or Not saying No.... and secondly... what are the consequences? 


Sure, sure... steal my post and look more fab in those leather pants...

dang it!



oh you just want to get into my pants........  and I don't really have a problem with that *G* 

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:27:19 AM   
marieToo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

And I don't believe you're in any way qualified to say what is healthy for all individuals.



If you have a beef with the dictionary definition - take it up with them.

Hey if you wanna support a post that implies it's not unhealthy for a slave to kill herself if her Master tells her too thats your perogative. i doubt many will support that stance.  i personally would hate a newbie reading posts here to get the impression slaves are mindless, self sacrificing, robots who obey irregardless of safety. i won't endorse it ever - if you do i feel sorry for you, you need a course in ethics.


Velvet: 

Some people think its sick.  Others think its heaven.  And its ok for you to find it sick, or wrong or abusive or 'unhealthy' as you put it..  And its ok to say it,  if you want to,  and argue against it.   We dont need qualifications to judge any type of relationship as healthy or unhealthy, we only need core beliefs;  and we all have those.
In my experiences I have found that some (not all) who do practice or have practiced  that level of slavery believe themselves that its 'fucked-up', but they crave it.  Anything  less is simply not potent enough for them.  You dont need to bleed for any slaves who live this way, honey.  There are slaves who would take any pain their Master wishes to deliver,  up to and including being torn from stem to stern in a brutal ass rape.  And you know what?  The same slave will thank Master for it---just for the honor---for the very priviledge of being the one he chooses to hurt.   And its as special to them as it is sick. 
 



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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:38:52 AM   
xkittenishx


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very, very well put marieToo!... as I was contemplating my own reply you managed to put down what I was thinking... (In probably a much more eloquent way then I would've!)

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:42:05 AM   
Tikkiee


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quote:

Some people think its sick.  Others think its heaven.  And its ok for you to find it sick, or wrong or abusive or 'unhealthy' as you put it..  And its ok to say it,  if you want to,  and argue against it.   We dont need qualifications to judge any type of relationship as healthy or unhealthy, we only need core beliefs;  and we all have those.
In my experiences I have found that some (not all) who do practice or have practiced  that level of slavery believe themselves that its 'fucked-up', but they crave it.  Anything  less is simply not potent enough for them.  You dont need to bleed for any slaves who live this way, honey.  There are slaves who would take any pain their Master wishes to deliver,  up to and including being torn from stem to stern in a brutal ass rape.  And you know what?  The same slave will thank Master for it---just for the honor---for the very priviledge of being the one he chooses to hurt.   And its as special to them as it is sick. 

Very nicely put Marie


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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:43:26 AM   
Lordandmaster


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I'm going to make a self-serving pitch for people to visit the poll I just started about TPE:

http://www.collarchat.com/m_569926/mpage_1/key_/tm.htm#569926

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:46:33 AM   
Homestead


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That's pretty much it, the inexorable potency and reality of the total loss of control to another's will. We manage this in different ways. I simply choose to practice it in ways that do minimal damage. It's a selfish thing, I want my property to be well adjusted and functional. I want the value and useablity to increase.

What others do it up to them.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 10:59:28 AM   
prpackaged


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Good discussion.  Again we have a difference of time frames.  Both slaves and subs need to negotiate the terms of their surrender before the relationship is consumated.  Since we do not have a legal system that allows slavery, the ultimate decision always come when the partner walks away from the relationship.  I would think that a slave would have no choice in a situation while a sub can negotiate the scene from moment to moment.  Am I reading this correctly?

Aside from that, the analogy of the car really hits home.  Given that a slave is property then it is incumbent on the master to care for his/her property.  Should the slave be exhibiting behavior that shows the possibility of damage then the master needs to back out and renegotiate the actions.  This choice of always having ones own way does not lead to much of a relationship. 

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 11:07:00 AM   
ownedgirlie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Homestead

That's pretty much it, the inexorable potency and reality of the total loss of control to another's will. We manage this in different ways. I simply choose to practice it in ways that do minimal damage. It's a selfish thing, I want my property to be well adjusted and functional. I want the value and useablity to increase.

What others do it up to them.

This is an assumption that was not made by some who were replying to my post.  It just so happens that my Master currently prefers his slaves to be alive, else they would be of little use to him. 

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 11:10:19 AM   
velvetears


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quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

Velvet: 

Some people think its sick.  Others think its heaven.  And its ok for you to find it sick, or wrong or abusive or 'unhealthy' as you put it..  And its ok to say it,  if you want to,  and argue against it.   We dont need qualifications to judge any type of relationship as healthy or unhealthy, we only need core beliefs;  and we all have those.
In my experiences I have found that some (not all) who do practice or have practiced  that level of slavery believe themselves that its 'fucked-up', but they crave it.  Anything  less is simply not potent enough for them.  You dont need to bleed for any slaves who live this way, honey.  There are slaves who would take any pain their Master wishes to deliver,  up to and including being torn from stem to stern in a brutal ass rape.  And you know what?  The same slave will thank Master for it---just for the honor---for the very priviledge of being the one he chooses to hurt.   And its as special to them as it is sick.  
 


Thank you marieToo for a very thoughtful and considerate post. i agree people should decide for themselves how they should live their bdsm relationship. my beliefs, values, ethics and such are just that mine.  Others will have different beliefs, ethisc and values.

The point wasn't if a slave objected to the pain her master subjected her to, it was to taking her very life.  Is there never a point as human beings (put aside being dom subs slave etc) that we say this is simply wrong.  Suppose a Master wanted to train a slaves unmentionable to be a slave? Do we turn a blind eye? What about the case in Germany where those gentlemen got together and one canibalized the other with his consent?  Can someome who thinks so little of their own life that they would allow another to take if from them really give consent?  Don't we as thinking human beings have to question what is happening??  This lifestyle is about SSC - nothing safe or sane about being asked to kill yourself. 

< Message edited by velvetears -- 9/4/2006 11:29:28 AM >


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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 11:15:35 AM   
Lordandmaster


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See, this is a great example of how you seem to assume that anyone who doesn't make the same choices you would make must not really be in a position to give informed consent.  If people don't believe what you believe, they must be insane...

Oh, and leave children out of this.  Aside from the fact that we've been talking about relationships between adults from the start, bringing up children is likely to get this whole thread pulled.

quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

What about the case in Germany where those gentlemen got together and one canibalized the other with his consent?  Can someome who thinks so little of their own life that they would allow another to take if from them really give consent?  Don't we as thinking human beings have to question what is happening??  This lifestyle is about SSC - nothing safe or sane about being asked to kill yourself. 

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 11:56:42 AM   
puella


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hehe... I would look wretched in your pants.

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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 12:33:29 PM   
ImpGrrl


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears
i agree people should decide for themselves how they should live their bdsm relationship. my beliefs, values, ethics and such are just that mine.  Others will have different beliefs, ethisc and values.


First you said this, and then you contradict it with:

quote:

The point wasn't if a slave objected to the pain her master subjected her to, it was to taking her very life.  Is there never a point as human beings (put aside being dom subs slave etc) that we say this is simply wrong.


My stance - if it's between two freely consenting adults, it's not my business.  It might be *absolutely* "wrong" in my eyes - but it's none of my business.

quote:

Suppose a Master wanted to train a slaves unmentionable to be a slave? Do we turn a blind eye?


This is not between two adults - it wouldn't count in the realm of "consensual".

quote:

What about the case in Germany where those gentlemen got together and one canibalized the other with his consent?


Between two consenting adults - not my business.

quote:

Can someome who thinks so little of their own life that they would allow another to take if from them really give consent?


You are putting your filters on it - how do you know that's how he felt?  Perhaps he felt so *highly* of himself and his flesh that he wanted to share it with others.  Odd hypothetical, but really - how do you know?

quote:

Don't we as thinking human beings have to question what is happening??


Sure, question it.  Questioning is good.  Decide for yourself whether that would be acceptable in your life.  And, if you aim to be slave, make good and sure your choice of owner reflects that.

quote:

This lifestyle is about SSC - nothing safe or sane about being asked to kill yourself.


"This lifestyle" isn't about any such thing.

First - "SSC" really only applies to *play*.  A decision such as whether to kill oneself because one's owner ordered one to is probably not play.

Second, not everyone lives by "SSC", even *in* play.

Third - there are far worse things than death.

I was going to take a separate reply and respond to the objections to my last post in this thread, regarding "no limits" etc, but I think I'll do it here.

I stand by my statement that all human beings have limits.  But mostly the "no limits" people read that and think I'm judging what limits people have, or "everyone should have death as a limit" or whatever.

My ideas on limits aren't that simple, or that ignorant.

Those who can truly call themselves "no limits" are slaves who have found an owner who shares their limits, or who has no interest in exploring those areas.

If someone believes that they truly have no limits, I posit that they probably haven't come across them yet.  And really - good for them. 

Not everyone would list death for their owner as a limit.  Not everyone would consider mutilation or killing another  - or any of those other ones usually mentioned in the "dreaded death thread" - a limit.   Like it or not, not all people have a moral issue with dying or killing or all of that other stuff.

But I still say there *is* a limit.  There is *something* which could make them reconsider the relationship.  Maybe it's being treated nicely.  Maybe it's being given equal authority.  Maybe it's topping the owner, or any other seemingly mundane thing.

And likely, those things match the things the owner won't do - and thus become moot within the relationship.

But they're still there, and they're still limits.

All people have limits.  One who aims to be slave has a responsibility to themself to figure out what theirs are - to figure out which ones are real and which ones can be gotten over, too - and to choose an owner accordingly.

I"m sure many "no limits" people still disagree with me, and that's ok.  Because really - it's between two consenting adults, thus it's none of my business.  But I do enjoy discussing things like that in fora like these.


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RE: Do slaves have the right to say no? - 9/4/2006 12:44:06 PM   
marieToo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

Velvet: 

Some people think its sick.  Others think its heaven.  And its ok for you to find it sick, or wrong or abusive or 'unhealthy' as you put it..  And its ok to say it,  if you want to,  and argue against it.   We dont need qualifications to judge any type of relationship as healthy or unhealthy, we only need core beliefs;  and we all have those.
In my experiences I have found that some (not all) who do practice or have practiced  that level of slavery believe themselves that its 'fucked-up', but they crave it.  Anything  less is simply not potent enough for them.  You dont need to bleed for any slaves who live this way, honey.  There are slaves who would take any pain their Master wishes to deliver,  up to and including being torn from stem to stern in a brutal ass rape.  And you know what?  The same slave will thank Master for it---just for the honor---for the very priviledge of being the one he chooses to hurt.   And its as special to them as it is sick.  
 


Thank you marieToo for a very thoughtful and considerate post. i agree people should decide for themselves how they should live their bdsm relationship. my beliefs, values, ethics and such are just that mine.  Others will have different beliefs, ethisc and values.

The point wasn't if a slave objected to the pain her master subjected her to, it was to taking her very life.  Is there never a point as human beings (put aside being dom subs slave etc) that we say this is simply wrong.  Suppose a Master wanted to train a slaves unmentionable to be a slave? Do we turn a blind eye? What about the case in Germany where those gentlemen got together and one canibalized the other with his consent?  Can someome who thinks so little of their own life that they would allow another to take if from them really give consent?  Don't we as thinking human beings have to question what is happening??  This lifestyle is about SSC - nothing safe or sane about being asked to kill yourself. 


I probably missed this part (death) somewhere along the line.  No, I wouldnt think its ok to give your life in such a way, though some would argue that giving your life for your country, your freedoms,  or to save another person drowning in a river would be honorable. 
In an Ms Ds or any other type of relationship, the giving of one's life would be something that I would consider wasteful not to mention immoral.  A dead slave is of no use to most Masters anyway.  And really, can you imagine someone trying to explain that one to the cops?  "Honest officer, she did it cuz I wanted her to prove her devotion to me".

The reason I posted to you here  (and I was trying to avoid this thread, other than to read it) is that, I see/saw myself in your words.   I think where you're coming from is a place that I try to touch on from time to time on these threads. 

The thing is this....In my world, its not ok to exploit the naive, its not ok to deceive, and its not ok to take advantage of the weak-minded.  I would definately consider that dishonorable.  Now, there are people in all walks of life, all genders, vanilla, flavored or what have you, that victimize people in a myriad of ways every day, many of them in their interpersonal relationships.  I dont think thats ok either.   I judge that as wrong, I judge that as dishonorable, I judge it as every dirty filthy word the english language can offer to describe it as sinful.  BUT that is not the same thing as someone who chooses to be in twisted relationship because their desire for 'twisted' over rides their concern for what is healthy for them.   Like you, I used to get all riled up over this stuff.  All riled up over the type of Masters that would put a suction hose down your throat, suck out your soul and replace it with their own.  This is what I consider jokingly as the "lobotomized slave". They do exist.  They dont live as lovers or spouses, they dont live with the right to be comfortable, or the right to complain, or the right to say no, or the right to expect anything, or the right have anything more than a hole in the ground to piss in...but as long as no one STOLE those rights from them by way of deceit,  and as long as the slave chooses to give up those rights...How could it be wrong?  I can still see it as unhealthy, or sick or dark  but maybe some people like and enjoy unhealthy and sick and dark.   I know its hard to get past this.  When I tell you I struggle with this every day of my life, Im not kidding you.  I struggle with it in the worst possible way, because Im the "junkie" who resists the line of cocaine. Why? Because common sense overrides my desire for the high.   I choose a more "sane" version of Ds because at this time in my life, risk is not a luxury I can afford.  But I can so understand those who choose this now.  For a long time, I couldnt accept it, because it wasnt in line with my choice and my own NEED to convince myself that this type of relationship is wrong.  (amayos has taken the brunt of this, because he represents to me, all that I wish I could hate)  Master and slave could have been replaced in my mind with the terms "Thief and victim".  Its hard to wrap your mind around the idea that there are some people who would rather be the shit on the bottom of Masters shoes, than be his princess. But they do exist, velvet.  When you accept that they are there not by way of victimization, but by way of choice,  you will be less upset by these types of subjects.  Take it from me. lol. 

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