Women Who Dislike Dominant Women

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Lashra -> Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:36:20 PM)
How do you feel when you hear another woman say that she dislikes dominant females, because she feels that we are betraying our gender by not living in the submissive role? And to take this further she also states that we are bringing down men with our fight for equality? When I hear a woman state this I do tend to loose respect for her as a woman(as I do men who say it as well). Now that maybe wrong of me, but I do. I look at her as if she were a 3rd gender or something. Because I honestly cannot understand how she thinks this way or why she believes what she does. With that said I understand everyone is entitled to their own opinions and they will not always agree with my own. I was raised to believe in equality between the sexes and in all people regardless of your sex, race, religion etc. That is the type of household I was raised in and my Mother chose to stay home, it was a choice not something that was forced upon her. So to me if a woman wants to live in the usual gender role its not a big issue or if she wants to get out and work its not big deal. But for some women they seem to really have a problem with other women who choose not to stay at home living under a man's rule. I don't get it at all. For years we have heard some (not all) men say these sorts of things regarding women and after awhile I know I just tend to mentally throw them on ignore. But for me when I hear this coming from another woman I find it quite disturbing. What I find even more disturbing is when a woman bashes equality and then takes up the male side of it. It almost seems to me as if this woman were trying as hard as she could for male acceptance and she is willing to turn her back on her sisters to gain that. To me male approval falls very low on my list of importance in life. I consider Me and my unmentionables happiness to be at the top of the list and that includes being my own person with the freedom to do what it is I wish to do in life. Is that so wrong? I'm curious to see what others think about this. ~Lashra

SexyFemDom -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:45:04 PM)
Sometimes people hate and judge what they fear.

starshineowned -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:51:57 PM)
Greetings..~smiles~ Has no issue's with Dominant women until the point they cross the line and try to act like Men or compare themselves equally to Men. Females are not equal to Men. Men are not equal to females. Were different for many reasons..the main one that sticks out is survival, and thankfully has carried us this far. That reason doesn't seem as needed these days as it once use to..but if all forget that reason..eventually it will come back to bite us in the ass. Well Wishes starshine Happy slave of Master Delvin

LaTigresse -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:53:03 PM)
I have read/heard that thought process also. While I obviously do not agree with it I just kind of lump it into the same category as the people that come beat on my door to try and save me by getting me to come to their church. I know I am never going to agree with them and I know that there is a good chance they will never be able to understand where I am coming from either. Call me crazy but I guess more than anything else I feel pity for them. Anyone that narrow minded is a sad individual. While I firmly believe that yes, many women are submissive and that is their happy place in life, for them to tell me it is MY place also is offensive. In my happy place none of it is not gender specific and I respect each person's, male or female, right to be the human being they feel most comfortable being. Whatever that is.

dicipline2 -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:56:10 PM)
How does dominant women keep men down? and why would those women who choose to remain in traditional gender roles really care? lol... I think a dominant woman is a wonderful thing and I enjoy the fact they stand their ground. On the flip side of the coin, women who enjoy giving in to their male counterparts are not doing anything wrong either. It is a personal choice that is based on personality. I found this disturbing trend you describe common among Gorean types. They seem to think it is natural for a woman to be subservient to the man. I dont think nature has anything to do with it. In a partnership between man and a woman the goal is to serve each other even within the traditional roles. In the old days a man would serve his wife and family by hunting to provide food or working a job to provide for them, the latter being more modern. He would also be willing to lay down his own life to protect his wife and his children. A woman would care and nurse the children and generally run the household as well as possibly working. She would insure the family ran in a cohesive manner. In both examples the man and woman serve each other for the greater good of their futures and that of any offspring they had. The fact is, no sex is the "natural boss" of the other. period. we adapt and choose to live they way we want.... so Lashra...I agree 100% with you.

LadyEllen -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 12:58:27 PM)
Pretty much with you on all that Lashra - though you almost lost me with the "sisters" bit - brought back some nightmarish images of feminist zealots with that one LOL! If its a choice to do the traditional female gender role, I have no problem with it. If its a choice to go out to work, I have no problem with it. I just cannot put up with the idea of my daughter being forced to do one, when she'd prefer to do the other, in either direction. She's a person too, after all. My only issue with all this, is that women too often try to compete according to male values and methods, which are often against their natures - I wish more women would compete in the workplace using female values and methods. I dont mean sleeping one's way to the board by that either, before any smartass comments! That said, I think your closing paragraph did indicate one thing - that women do tend to have different priorities to those of many men. Personally I would like to see mothers being able to remain at home with their children, rather than being forced to go out and work, but too often its the latter and not the former, because caring for her children (which is her first priority) means she must earn money to feed them rather than raise and nurture them. E

thetammyjo -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:09:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: starshineowned Greetings..~smiles~ Has no issue's with Dominant women until the point they cross the line and try to act like Men or compare themselves equally to Men. Females are not equal to Men. Men are not equal to females. Were different for many reasons..the main one that sticks out is survival, and thankfully has carried us this far. That reason doesn't seem as needed these days as it once use to..but if all forget that reason..eventually it will come back to bite us in the ass. Well Wishes starshine Happy slave of Master Delvin Are you sure you are using the word equal the best way? Sounds more like you are using "equal" to mean "identical". No two people are identical but why would you as a woman not want to be equal to men in terms of economic, political, educational, and other areas of life? I can understand why you as a slave would not want to have the same equal rights and responsibilities as your chosen master but do you apply that to all men? Do you expect that of all women?

starshineowned -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:19:29 PM)
Greetings..~smiles~ Believe Ma'am if you re-read what this girl wrote..you will find no inferences regarding the use "equal" being applied to equal rights for Men or women. Well Wishes starshine Happy slave of Master Delvin

LadyEllen -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:22:34 PM)
I'd have to support starshine on this one - men and women are not equal, in the sense that one is the same as the other. The biological differences and the imperatives arising from that are obvious factors in making them not the same! However, men and women should be treated equitably, and have equitable opportunity and choice. Thats the point. E

amaidiamond -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:25:34 PM)
I have no problem with Dominant woman, I could not see myself submitting to a woman in the long term though there are Dominant women I like and respect who I have scened with on occasion because I am naturally submissive to males not females, I do not understand Dominant women but also I do not understand Dominant men or sub males either because I am none of those things. Each to their own I say

TheShadows -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:35:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lashra How do you feel when you hear another woman say that she dislikes dominant females, because she feels that we are betraying our gender by not living in the submissive role? And to take this further she also states that we are bringing down men with our fight for equality? SNIP I feel like telling her to worry about her own business before sticking her nose into mine, but I usually don't. She can dislike me as a Dominant Woman all she wants. I believe she's betraying the female gender 1000% worse than I ever could by trying to shove every woman who happens to be dominant under the bus to promote the greater good of men, just because she identifies as submissive. If I were to venture a guess, this particular brand of female is usually the one you'll find crawling behind the Male Supremacist whilst he's spouting that "all Dominant Women are really submissive....they just haven't found the right Master yet" garbage. She's entitled to her opinion, but she's not entitled to shove it down my throat. In closing, it makes me sick. As always, YMMV... MrsShadows

DiannaVesta -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:37:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SexyFemDom Sometimes people hate and judge what they fear. That is so very true!

Lashra -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 1:43:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen I'd have to support starshine on this one - men and women are not equal, in the sense that one is the same as the other. The biological differences and the imperatives arising from that are obvious factors in making them not the same! However, men and women should be treated equitably, and have equitable opportunity and choice. Thats the point. E LadyEllen, again you have worded it so much better than I[:D] Yes I totally agree with your statement. ~Lashra

starshineowned -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 2:34:33 PM)
quote: "Until equality for all is achieved, the world will remain fragmented and inhumane." If you could Ma'am..give this girl alittle more insight as to what exactly it is you feel is currently un-equal in our society? Well Wishes starshine Happy slave of Master Delvin

MissyRane -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 2:44:43 PM)
well I don't know..I don't know any women in Iceland that know what a dominant woman is even though they may be behaving like them...but I know I luv them[:)] ahem...well Lady Heather in CSI ..they found her kinda strange but then they didn't even know what she was[8\|] and they didn't really think about it it's ya know..all in the movies.

MisPandora -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 2:50:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dicipline2 I found this disturbing trend you describe common among Gorean types. They seem to think it is natural for a woman to be subservient to the man. I dont think nature has anything to do with it. In a partnership between man and a woman the goal is to serve each other even within the traditional roles. Perhaps you wouldn't be so disturbed if you understood that the premise comes from a fictional book series. If you'd have ever read the books, you'd really understand it. It'd be hard to live life as a Star Trek character and espouse that "culture" if you didn't get sci-fi or had never seen Star Trek, wouldn't it?

LadyEllen -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 2:55:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lashra quote: ORIGINAL: LadyEllen I'd have to support starshine on this one - men and women are not equal, in the sense that one is the same as the other. The biological differences and the imperatives arising from that are obvious factors in making them not the same! However, men and women should be treated equitably, and have equitable opportunity and choice. Thats the point. E LadyEllen, again you have worded it so much better than I[:D] Yes I totally agree with your statement. ~Lashra Lashra - thank you so much for that. Its nice to know that someone I regard so highly, could find something admirable about me too! E

Squeakers -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 3:02:48 PM)
i don't have a problem with Dommes in general however i do have a problem with a woman becoming Dominant simply because she has been abused in past relationships and feels she needs to be assured that she will never be abused again or needs to pay back men in general and chooses a male sub to in turn abuse. i am not straight so i would not call a Domme Ma'am unless my Male counterpart asked it of me yet i would not call another Dom Sir unless it was asked of me to do so. i do feel that i should be submissive to a man and that for me it is the natural order of things however, in reality i really would not be submissive to all men or for that matter just any man and although Domme's may not be my thing--i can't say i dislike all of them. i have met a few who are very good and regardless of how i feel the natural order of things should be---there are those select Dommes who are right where they need to be.

Najakcharmer -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 3:14:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: starshineowned Has no issue's with Dominant women until the point they cross the line and try to act like Men or compare themselves equally to Men. Females are not equal to Men. Men are not equal to females. Were different for many reasons..the main one that sticks out is survival, and thankfully has carried us this far. That reason doesn't seem as needed these days as it once use to..but if all forget that reason..eventually it will come back to bite us in the ass. Well, what do you define as "acting like a man?" Back in the 1940's, if a woman wanted to wear pants instead of a skirt, play any kind of sports, climb a tree, shoot a gun, learn martial arts, work outside the home or have a life that didn't revolve around some guy, that would be frowned on as "acting like a man". In the 1800's, a woman who actually wanted to be literate would have been chided for "acting like a man". Sorry, but if "acting like a man" is defined by a society that wants to take away my right to live my life to its fullest, fuck that shit. I respect other people's right to live their life in the way that makes them happy and self-actualized, but the moment somebody tries to tell me that I can't do this or that or the other thing because that is "acting like a man", they have crossed a line. I have the right to live my life too, and I'm exercising it. If anyone tries to get in the way of me living my life or doing my job, there will be serious trouble. I do not tolerate people interfering in my life because they think I should be living it according to their moral standards. Gender isn't particularly relevant to performance in jobs that don't involve heavy physical work. So yes, I expect to be compared equally with men and women on the basis of my actual performance and my professional ability, not my gender. Terribly selfish of me, I suppose. Also, does this mean you think that gay, genderbent and transgendered people are somehow wrong or bad for being who they are?

LadyEllen -> RE: Women Who Dislike Dominant Women (10/10/2006 3:54:44 PM)
Now, I'm not sure if I got this right - even after several edits! but here goes - Women "acting like a man" - I have to say this is also a problem for me. Women are not men. Women are women, and valid in their own right. They dont need to act like a man in order to be valid people. Some women dont seem to understand this, and end up playing a male role according to male rules, which all but very few will win at, and only at the cost of what it is that makes them feminine, which only leads to disrespect for women. Women doing things traditionally falling within the range of normal male gender role - this is entirely different to women acting like men. Women are quite capable of performing any task that men might traditionally do within the male gender role - including heavy labour, by the way. As long as they remember at all times to be themselves - and not fall into the trap of acting like men in accomplishing whatever male role activity it is on which they are engaged, instead playing a male role according to female rules, then very many will succeed, preserve their femininity and achieve respect for women. E

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