Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 7:01:45 AM   
MysticFireTopaz


Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline 		Personally, I prefer "Ma'am," "Lady Topaz," or "Ms. Topaz."  I wouldn't mind being called "Miss Topaz," though I don't get that one often.  I really don't care for subs I don't own addressing Me as "Mistress" and I also don't like it when they simply say "Topaz," either.
 
Frequenty, I get introductory letters using "Mistress" from people I don't know.  I don't go ballistic over it, but simply correct the person and let them know how I would prefer to be addressed.  One thing I did find very offensive recently was a sub I didn't know from Adam signing his e-mail as "Your Slave."  Pretty presumptuous, since I had never met him, let alone accepted him as My slave.  I corrected him once, and he did it again (not very bright).  I corrected him yet again, and he used "YS" (probably a SAM)  At that point, he was blocked.
 
To the OP, it's a pity the Domme didn't understand her when you asked how to address her, because that's the only way to find out a Domme's preferences.  It really does vary by the individual Domme.
 
Lady Topaz

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 7:18:46 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		If someone first approaches me I don't mind a "Ma'am" or a "Ms. TammyJo" (or even Miss) or one of those common polite titles and my last name is fine (if they know it).

At that point I'll ask to be called "TammyJo". If my request isn't followed and no reason is given (there are some valid reasons such as childhood training or the idea that they don't know me well enough to use my first name).

In my opinion (note it isn't a humble opinion here) anyone who expects you to use a particular title with them but is unclear about that upfront does not deserve your further attention.

Personally someone who expected me to use a title upfront at all wouldn't get my further attention but that's just me and mine.

The other side of this is that I expect someone who contacts me to have a "real" name that I may use when addressing and speaking with them. It doesn't have to be their legal name but it really shouldn't be a fetish, body part, or sexual act reference either.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 7:21:55 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I prefer to be called by my name. 

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 8:15:04 AM   
ToGiveDivine


Posts: 650
Status: offline 		Just refer to them as honey, toots (short for tootsie), or Babe - they LOVE that.

Oh yeah, let me know when you are going to do this, I want to watch what happens, er... to you ROFL

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 9:21:07 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		The crappy thing is...it's going to depend on the person and you won't actually know until you ask. Make it your first question. If they yell at you when you feel you've done nothing wrong, then they probably aren't a match for you anyway.

For the record, I prefer Ma'am.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 9:24:18 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline 		I prefer to be addressed by a stranger as Pandora, Ma'am if they're feeling extremely formal.  Mistress comes only from owned property, and on rare occasion, Goddess from a preferred slave.

BUT --

I am clear to give this instruction early on in a conversation.  It's childish and stupid to throw a tantrum over being called something incorrectly if you've not given the instruction.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 9:28:40 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline 		Whatever happened to a polite gentleman just ASKING what she prefers to be addressed by before he goes and says something stupid?

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 9:40:26 AM   
HamiltonCoDomme


Posts: 30
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		MisPandora,

Amen!

Once again you have hit the nail on the head!

Mistress Jamie
a/k/a HamiltonCoDomme

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 9:43:30 AM   
michaelGA2


Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline 		well...i know one thing Dommes don't wanna hear...

"Hey You"

LOL


_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to HamiltonCoDomme)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 10:06:23 AM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline 		bad joke



 - R

< Message edited by UtopianRanger -- 10/18/2006 10:12:53 AM >

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to Lorelei115)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 11:01:43 AM   
VampX


Posts: 23
Joined: 10/16/2006
Status: offline 		you just need to be polite like you are adressing any other person

________
bloodthirsty

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 11:18:30 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		I prefer "Miss" or my name.  I can't remember if it's specified in the profile or not, but I am one of the ones that HATES to be called ma'am - however, as long as the person stops calling me ma'am after I mention that I hate it, then it's no big deal, because I know it's simply meant to be respectful.  Now, if the person continues to call me ma'am after I've stated my preference, then they are gone - because ignoring my preference shows great disrespect.

I'm with whoever said that someone who flies off the handle about a title isn't worth your time anyway - just move on to someone who is more reasonable and mentally stable (or at least more reasonable).

(in reply to VampX)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 1:36:21 PM   
DocB70


Posts: 2
Joined: 10/17/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with others when they say the best thing to do is simply ask how to properly address someone.  You don't know if you don't ask.

With me personally, Mistress is reserved for those I own.  Ma'am is an acceptable form of approach, to a degree, but it can get old and it does make me feel old as well.  I am use to being addressed by my earned title of Doc.  I feel being addressed as Doc shows me just as much respect as Ma'am.

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 2:27:09 PM   
Samwhiplash


Posts: 191
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		I hate Ma'am with a vengance - agghhhhh.

I like Mistress (which I do not necessarily equate solely with ownership) and in vanilla circumstances I like Miss.

As everyone else said.... definitely do ask before you get into a lengthy chat.

(in reply to DocB70)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 2:31:01 PM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		oh and another thing...once she gives her preference, use it.  Do not berate her on how odd she is for her preference.  I had that happen to me recently when someone kept calling me "Miss".  I said I prefer "Ma'am" and he said well that just makes you seem old and you are not old.  I'll call you Miss.

Guess how long that conversation lasted?

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 2:52:41 PM   
Aji


Posts: 14
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline 		when it comes to my master, (i know this isnt a mistress but you can make it so) i like to use "my lord". you can use "my lady" as well but i like that. iono just makes them seem so more honored and cherished. :)

(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 3:07:10 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline 		I like to be a-dressed in them thar leathers and boots. 

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to masochistboy)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 7:49:51 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Samwhiplash

I hate Ma'am with a vengance - agghhhhh.

I like Mistress (which I do not necessarily equate solely with ownership) and in vanilla circumstances I like Miss.

As everyone else said.... definitely do ask before you get into a lengthy chat.

And me, I equate "Miss" with my being 6 years old, in a pinafore, crinolines, white gloves and maryjanes.  My brain explodes when someone calls me that as an adult.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 7:52:31 PM   
michaelGA2


Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline 		i seem to be wasting some good funny comments as of late. guess not many appreciate my humor...LOL

_____________________________

Are we having fun, yet?

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? - 10/18/2006 8:20:54 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline 		I prefer Ma'am, and the term Mistress is reserved for someone who is collared to me.  Just for the record, hello sunshine is not a great way to greet me, chuckles.

(in reply to michaelGA2)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: How do Dommes prefer to be addressed? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094