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subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:14:52 AM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
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i am wondering, what happens when a sub loses his/her temper? allow me to elaborate.

recently, i applied for a job with a company i used to work for and (due to some unforeseen personal issues) i was left (it's a long story)...the company opened a location here in town and i applied. was even called in before the application process begain by the owner/manager to meet and discuss my experience and knowledge. the manager appeared pleased with me...yet, after going through all the red tape and putting in a lot of effort in this, i was not hired.

the manager has only been with the company 6 months and i was with the company for 2 1/2 years. they even told me, of all the applicants, i had the most experience. i also heard from several applicants that a few of them had never worked in this field before. they all were sure i would be the first to be hired. everything pointed in this direction. even the manager's attitude had lead me to believe i would get the job.

as a sub, which of course, they are unaware of this fact, do i have a right to be anger or upset? how should i deal with this situation?

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RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:19:25 AM

nessalovestats

Posts: 23
Joined: 10/10/2006
Status: offline

i think you hae every right to be angry or upset, you were mislead and it is a common human reaction to vent these problems...

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Post #: 2

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:19:39 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

Accept it. You were not hired. End of story.

/shrug

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We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
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Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

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Post #: 3

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:21:54 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

Being submissive doesn't mean you are devoid of emotions.

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Post #: 4

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:23:22 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Being a submissive doesn't mean you cant stand up for yourself in your other aspects of life outside BDSM. I have to be very assertive and sometimes aggressive at my job and this doesn't make me any less of a slave. It is called standing up for yourself.

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RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:25:08 AM

MissyRane

Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline

Sure you can be pissed off.
Here it's started to work the way that people over 40 are just too old to be hired into positions, companies prefer the novices. It's caused a lot of debates and there was this time where the more experienced people were told to pack their bags and then they couldn't get another job 'cause they're too old. The companies have started to change this habit a little bit now since they realise it's not very wise to fire the experienced folks and they kind of lose in the long term when only hiring complete novice. I would be pissed off, but hey you didn't get the job - shit happens, they didn't want your skills and so be it, it doesn't do any good to rant about it really.

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Post #: 6

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:25:24 AM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline

thing is, i was the only white person to apply, also, the application process was routed through the Employement Office and previously, i had inquired about opening my own store for the company and was contacted by the franchaise recruiter to begin the process. i put that on hold to see if i could get in with this store. since this occured, i have continued the process and am planning on just opening up my own. with my knowledge of everything, i have high hopes of making a good go at it.

hopefully, this will lead to a better store and i will have more people visiting me than this manager.

(btw, the company in question is Fuddrucker's and i know i can make this work)

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RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:26:26 AM

eroticangel

Posts: 272
Joined: 2/13/2006
Status: offline

as submissives we are allowed to have emotions..... just from reading your post tho, i would imagine the fact that you left the company before may have had something to do with it.

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Post #: 8

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:26:48 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

I am trying to understand what being submissive has to do with work. In my opinion they are two seperate issues. I am a dominant yet have a boss. Yes, I am lucky in that I have alot of leeway in how I accomplish my job, how I deal with the guys that work for me but still, I do not own the business, I have to run the business as the owner deems fit. Sometimes I do not agree, sometimes the owner changes his mind based upon my opinions, sometimes he doesn't. Sometimes I piss him off and visa versa. It is a job, it is not my life nor does it define me as a person. I would be a dominant even if I was the janitor at McDonalds, granted, I would probably end up managing the place within a few months, that is my work history. But the fact is the job is not me, it does not determine how I relate to people outside of the job.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Post #: 9

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:34:11 AM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline

after going through all the chocolate in the house, i took a long walk (to the convienince store for more chocolate). the store is a mile each way. ate half the chocolate on the walk home and am in the process of finishing it off this morning. chocolate, it's what's for breakfast.

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Post #: 10

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:44:09 AM

Morrigel

Posts: 492
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2
as a sub, which of course, they are unaware of this fact, do i have a right to be anger or upset? how should i deal with this situation?

Being a sub in your interpersonal/sexual relationships has nothing to do with being angry about work. So long as you don't go home and try to "take it out" on your mistress, I guess...

Regardless, how you should feel and how you should deal with the situation are two separate issues. How you should feel? Seriously annoyed, if not genuinely angry. How you should handle it? Probably wisest to maintain a mask of perfect politeness and solicitude, ask those who claimed to think well of you for recommendations, and send out a blitzkrieg of resumes and applications to find new work. You never know--you might find a new job which would be much better.

-M

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Post #: 11

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:47:33 AM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline

well, i think my best route at this point is to continue with the franchaise process and make a better store than the one this novice manager is opening (he admited to only being with the company for only 6 months)

i don't think the kid knows what he's doing...LOL

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Post #: 12

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:51:21 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

Then you'll get the last laugh.
And yes...laughing is also allowed even though you are submissive.

Edited to add...Good luck.

(in reply to michaelGA2)

Post #: 13

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:52:38 AM

smilezz

Posts: 2156
Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline

Well you just don't have anything nice to say do you? *laughs*
/shrug /sigh /yawn i think i have covered a few of the boredom marks.

Happy Saturday!!

~smilezz~

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Post #: 14

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:54:32 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

/sigh

Ok, you left the company previously due to personal issues. Obviously, they keep records of such things and probably noted that with your new application.
Perhaps your previous work xp with them left something to be desired? I don't know; I am not privvy to such information.
In regards to your now claim that it's because you are not black...well, all I can say is that before I believe this, I want to see the applications of EVERY person who applied for that same job.
Also, I would ask, when you applied did you mention that you were more interested in opening your own store? That may have had something to do with it also.
/shrug
Like I said, your post comes off more as poor me scenario, let's blame everyone else kind of thing; then a genuine request for advice or help. Of course, my vision may be colored by my view of you from these boards; which we all know does not constitute a knowing of someone on a personal level .

Either way, I stand by what I said earlier. You did not get the job. Accept it and move on.

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

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Post #: 15

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:58:07 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: smilezz

Well you just don't have anything nice to say do you? *laughs*
/shrug /sigh /yawn i think i have covered a few of the boredom marks.

Happy Saturday!!

~smilezz~

Not today no. My BS meter is full .

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to smilezz)

Post #: 16

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:58:27 AM

jthorne

Posts: 99
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

La Tigresse...couldn't have said it better!

(in reply to Kalira)

Post #: 17

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 6:59:20 AM

smilezz

Posts: 2156
Joined: 6/18/2004
Status: offline

LOL!!!!!

_____________________________

=It's not my fault that when I was a baby I was dropped in a box of Glitter & I have been shinin' ever since=

�*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,.-:* � �*:-.,_,-:* �

(in reply to Kalira)

Post #: 18

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 7:01:25 AM

michaelGA2

Posts: 1533
Joined: 4/26/2006
Status: offline

my previous work with the company was exemplory (not sure that's spelled right), i was often called in on days off to either train newbies, cover for someone who called out, or was requested by guests that would only come in if i were working. many a time, i covered the entired dining area solo because others wouldn't come in for some reason or other. i trained more people doing server work than the person that was assigned to do so, because i did a better job...i was the best (still am)

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Post #: 19

RE: subs and displays of anger - 10/21/2006 7:04:32 AM

jthorne

Posts: 99
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline

The word is exemplary, Michael.

If you love the job so much, then do go ahead and pursue your own franchise. I still fail to see what your rejection from a job has to do with your sub-ness. I'm of the firm opinion that one shouldn't mix the lifestyle into work...unless you're in the life for a living! *wink*

(in reply to michaelGA2)

Post #: 20

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