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XianDominSJ -> RE: "Christian" BDSM? (11/4/2006 6:54:42 AM)
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Wow, this is been quite a thread. I guess I should de-lurk here for a minute. Starting back in 1998 I was involved with the only (as far as we knew) Christian BDSM group online. The group was formed a year prior when a couple of Christians hanging out in USENET groups got tired of the abuse, snide comments, and general venom directed towards Christians. As I told a friend recently, "…we knew the inside of the closet as well as we knew the inside of a church." Indeed, the predominant attitude in evangelical Christianity is that BDSM is abusive and is totally inappropriate for a Christian. As zuma noted a couple days ago, we indeed were "birds of a feather" who simply wanted to flock together, so to speak. We simply wanted a place where we could be open about our kink, faith, struggles, life in the closet, family concerns, etc. Since our early foundational work in the late 90’s a number of BDSM groups claiming to be Christian have risen and fallen, ranging from fundamentalist groups (i.e., non-homosexual, male-only headship, etc.) to some more liberal groups where you can do anything/anyone you want as long as you call yourself a Christian while you're doing it.
That said, I do want to address the assertion I've seen that "Christian BDSM" seems either oxymoronic (like military intelligence) or an unnecessary qualification (like "microbiologist BDSM").
I'm sure you've all seen how the number one newbie question is some variation of, "What is the difference between a slave in a submissive?" Well, in Christian BDSM groups arguably the number one topic is, "How can I be a Christian and do BDSM?" Needless to say we spent years going around that question ad nausea. The bottom line is, it depends on what you believe Christianity requires of you, and what "things" you believe are involved in BDSM. Actually, in the groups, a basic question was more often phrased something like: "If Christ came to set us free, isn't bondage a sin?" [For the curious, the answer to that question goes something like this: As Christians, bought with a blood price by our new master, Christ, we are His slaves, slaves to righteousness, and no longer slaves to sin. This is not, however, to be interpreted that we don't sin, only that we should understand that a way has been bought for us that we would not be trapped in a hopeless cycle of bondage to sin. From the Christian theological perspective it's not a matter of whether to be in bondage or free, but to what/whom we will be in bondage. Ergo, bondage, especially as a metaphor, is not at all inappropriate or without Biblical precedent.]
Second, "Christian BDSM" is not an unnecessary qualification to define our lifestyle and practice. As a prefix to the practice, the name means something. Some have tried to reverse those two, putting the BDSM before the "Christian" part, wherein their BDSM beliefs/morals (or lack thereof) define their Christianity, rather than the other way around. But I also call myself a Christian Dom for the same reasons I prefer the term "Christian BDSM." Simply put, my Christian faith informs, shapes, compels, and restrains me in how I conduct myself as a Dom. As we've all probably heard, the bottom line Golden rule is to do unto others as you would have done unto you. Okay, that's the basics. But what about His other examples and lessons -- grace, love, mercy, patience, self-sacrifice -- that a Christian leader/Dom must demonstrate? We've heard it said around here and in other places, a "master" must master himself before he can master another. While around here that may only carry the weight of mere opinion, in Christian D/s or BDSM we would recognize that as a doctrinal imperative since that statement nearly exactly mirrors a couple of Biblical texts explaining the qualifications for church leadership. Another example: Since throughout the New Testament the relationship between Christ and the Church is expressly called a marriage (Christ as the bridegroom, the Church as the bride) the nature of that marriage informs our understanding an expression of Christian marriage in general. So if someone raises the question, "In what ways, and how far, should the church obey Christ?" the answer would be, "Totally and in all things." Well, with that in mind, we've got all kinds of interesting discussions regarding Total Power Exchange relationships as a reflection of the Christ-Church marriage relationship. Anyway, those are but a few examples of how the unique theology and intimate imagery influences many of us who practice "Christian BDSM."
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