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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 4:51:10 PM   
LTRsubNW


Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: someonesbitchboy

We all have word processors with spell check nowadays so, there’s no reason for spelling errers.


("Errors")

(There's an "edit" button, top right).

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 6:17:06 PM   
Ava82


Posts: 55
Joined: 1/2/2006
Status: offline 		*shrugs* I think it's the only first impression one can make on the internet, so I try to make it a good one.  That's all.

(in reply to LTRsubNW)
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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 6:19:30 PM   
adommeforu


Posts: 847
Status: offline 		If W/we were able to spell correctly, there would not be a need for the spell checker, however, My bloody PC does not know this and allows all sorts of crap through, and as I cannot spell in the first place, how am I supposed to argue or correct the bloody thing lol

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 6:24:53 PM   
songofeire


Posts: 40
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: someonesbitchboy

"Loaded with spelling and grammar mistakes and online terminology better suited for  the profiles stay up there for long periods of time without ever being corrected. "

There is no subject or predicate in the above sentence. It is an incomplete sentence, a fragment, and non-grammatical.

SongOfEire


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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 6:28:35 PM   
adommeforu


Posts: 847
Status: offline 		Oh well spotted, songofeire.....Brava.

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 7:07:43 PM   
lovetokissnylons


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/17/2006
Status: offline 		Claire, that's marvelous, but ..... what's a "plonker" ?

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 7:40:03 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline 		BUT I R TEH DOMINATE MISTRESS.  U WILL NEEL 2 ME RITE NOW.  IF U DO NOT THEN U R NOT REEL SUBMISIVE.  I HAVE MENY YRS EXPERENCE IN DOMINATE.   WHEN U SUBMITE 2 ME U WILL BE COLLARD & BRAND.  WITH RED HOT IRON.  ON TEH FORE HEAD.  & U WILL B KEPT NEKKID & CHANED 2 DUNGON FLOOR 24 HRS A DAY.  IN UPSIDE DOWN SUSPENSHUN.  I AM REEL DOMINATE.  ALL OF YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.  

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 8:33:43 PM   
defiantbadgirl


Posts: 2988
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline 		Everyone makes occasional mistakes in grammar and spelling, however spelling simple words incorrectly is a huge turn off.

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 8:38:38 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I am very forgiving on spelling.  Since I have a bit of dyslexia and tend to invert letters , or miss doubled ones when I type, I dont see it fair to hold that against someone else. However, grammar and use of actual words as opposed to abbreviations is another point entirely. While I can forgive poor spelling, building basic sentences to get your point across is not too much to ask.  If you dont have the time to spell out a 3 letter word like YOU, what sort of image is that giving to a potential owner who is ging to expect attention to detail and investment of time? Were those other 2 letters realy that much of a time crunch that you couldnt be botehred to put them in?
At least in my opinion, even without a great grasp of spelling, a letter that looks thought out and like a bit of effort was put in scores far higher than one where web-slang and sentence fragments make it necessary to reread several times before we can figure out what it meant.  Also, typing an entire first letter in CAPS is annoying, Id almost prefer all lowercase, since thats easier to read.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

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VampiresLair

(in reply to defiantbadgirl)
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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 8:42:27 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		You value spelling and grammar a great deal, I am sure it will be something that you make sure any dominant person courting you has going for them. I did not expect perfection in a dominant person, but I certainly took note when a well compose email that addressed my profile was sent my way, and yes I wanted to talk with only those with an good grasp of the English language.

That being said, I did not make the leap that just because someone did not have good spelling, use a spell checker, had only a rudimentary level of skill with written language that this meant they would make a bad dominant. They would not make a good dominant for me, but I assume that they will find someone else that has the same interests, habits, and pastimes as they do. I have zero interest in sports for example, I would make a sports nut very displeased. I would make a dominant that was not intellectually inclined unhappy also.

I think if you looked at it the other way around it might be illuminating for you. You would probably bore the tears out of many doms with your nit-picky ways and anal retentiveness. This does not make you unsuitable, just unsuitable to a certain percentage of available doms... you need someone like you. I would just caution you from judging the honor and integrity of someone based upon whether they use spell check... Ted Bundy was very articulate.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 10/25/2006 8:43:03 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to someonesbitchboy)
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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 9:35:49 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

You value spelling and grammar a great deal, I am sure it will be something that you make sure any dominant person courting you has going for them. [...]
I think if you looked at it the other way around it might be illuminating for you. You would probably bore the tears out of many doms with your nit-picky ways and anal retentiveness. This does not make you unsuitable, just unsuitable to a certain percentage of available doms... you need someone like you. I would just caution you from judging the honor and integrity of someone based upon whether they use spell check... Ted Bundy was very articulate.


Taking tongue out of cheek here and dropping the I R TEH DOMINATE act, I would have to say that literacy and the ability to articulate clearly and expressively is also a specific requirement of mine.  Or perhaps you could call it a fetish. 

I'm a science geek and an avid reader.  I tend to write (and talk) like a professor lecturing, or so I'm told.  I like books better than food and I frequently have my nose buried in one.  I don't do an intellectual schtick on purpose to impress people. It just feels natural and appropriate to express myself this way.  It's part of who and what I am.  It doesn't make me better than anyone who isn't wired this way, but it does make me more comfortable around other people who are wired the same way I am.  Eg, other geeks and nerds. 

And yeah, most people who aren't wired this way are likely to be bored silly in a conversation with me, which is as likely to wander down alleyways of science fiction and fantasy literature as it is to touch on biotoxicology, sports nutrition and science, taxonomy or biology.  And in turn I am going to be bored with someone who can't or won't hold up their end of a geeky conversation. 

PS - I am not Ted Bundy, nor his evil twin sister. 

< Message edited by Najakcharmer -- 10/25/2006 9:36:42 PM >

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 10:32:54 PM   
someonesbitchboy


Posts: 3
Joined: 7/16/2006
Status: offline 		Thank you to all who posted honest and helpful opinions.  And also to those who had fun with it-- they were good for a laugh.  I'll ignore all those who took it personally and decided to be less than constructive... I knew there would be a few there always are.  I wasn't trying to insult anyone really.
As for my own mistakes... like I said, we all make mistakes.  Although, the one 'errer' was by design...gimme a break I am using a spell checker here, it was supposed to be funny... actually making a spelling error of the word 'error'... get it?  The other was an unfinished bit of editing.  Oops.  Moving on.   So, I guess for some it's a question style?  That's cool.  But I can see the difference between someone who is intelligent and knows what they're doing and just wants to write that way and another who... well, doesn't have those qualities.

I may have come off as anal retentive or nit-picky, but I'm not talking about the odd mistake here or there.  Nor am I judging the entire person based on their writing.  But, lets face it, the profile is usually the first impression you have of someone and, for a while at least, all you have to go on.  I mean there are profiles out there (and I really meant to concentrate more on the profiles and not emails and postings so much) that are really horrendous and essentially unreadable.  “BUT I R TEH DOMINATE MISTRESS.  U WILL NEEL 2 ME RITE NOW.  IF U DO NOT THEN U R NOT REEL SUBMISIVE.”  That was written in this posting as a bit of humor, but that’s not too far from the truth for the more extreme examples of what I’ve seen out there.  We’ve all seen them.  And these people expect any kind of power exchange to take place?  And if you tell me that you haven’t seen and summarily dismissed a profile or email like the parody above then I would say that you’re probably lying.

The real issue for me is the exchange of power.  I'm handing my safety and very life over to another person and there needs to be trust built and confidence instilled right from the start, in my nit-picky opinion anyway.

Thanks again to all those who helped.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to another forum-- perhaps one dealing with psychology-- and see if anyone can tell me why so many people take a general question/comment (that isn’t even directed at them) so personally that they then lash out with insults and criticism just to make themselves feel better.

(He strolls out of the room before the grenade goes off.)

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 10:44:26 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Please do not misunderstand, I am a geek too, and I stated in my post that I would want someone that I believe to be my intellectual equal, or nearly so, I have found someone that I think is my intellectual superior.

I was just stating that the OP seemed to be denigrating to people that were not on par with their written communication skills, while we all have personal quirks that we like, we should not assume that because someone else is not a genius that does not make them unworthy...

Lots of jerks can spell well..and lots of nice people cannot.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/25/2006 10:56:25 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

And these people expect any kind of power exchange to take place?  And if you tell me that you haven’t seen and summarily dismissed a profile or email like the parody above then I would say that you’re probably lying


I would dismiss them because they would not be suitable for me, but that does not make them totally unlovable and destined to die alone and childless. There is someone for everyone, and I know there are functionally illiterate people all over the USA, it would be more productive to try get the next generation to be more literate than it would be to pick on people that are not or believe you are superior as a human being. I would rather date someone who was functionally illiterate because of a learning disability or because of hardships as a child than someone who had a superiority complex.. but that is just me.

quote:

The real issue for me is the exchange of power.  I'm handing my safety and very life over to another person and there needs to be trust built and confidence instilled right from the start, in my nit-picky opinion anyway.



I did not know that spelling and grammar made someone uber domly...Um, I think that if you believe this, that should guide and direct you, but to assume that everyone should ostricize dom/mes who do not use spell check and do not have a great grasp of English language and bash people like you are seemingly are doing is another story. I am anal about some stuff, but I do not project that on to others... that would be a futile endeavor.

When I see profiles, posts, emails with major grammar and spelling problems I do not spend a lot of time thinking about it, but that is just me.

quote:

Thanks again to all those who helped.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to another forum-- perhaps one dealing with psychology-- and see if anyone can tell me why so many people take a general question/comment (that isn’t even directed at them) so personally that they then lash out with insults and criticism just to make themselves feel better


Let me know how that goes, will you?

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 10/25/2006 10:58:46 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to someonesbitchboy)
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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 12:17:00 AM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: someonesbitchboy

But, I find it very disconcerting when I look at some profiles on this site and others of people who consider themselves dominant but seem to write on an elementary school level.  Loaded with spelling and grammar mistakes and online terminology better suited for  the profiles stay up there for long periods of time without ever being corrected.


No one is perfect.  Everyone makes mistakes.  But, if you really expect anyone to take you seriously as a Master, Mistress, Goddess or anything like that, then shouldn't you take great care in how you present yourself?  I expect a master/mistress to be very much in control, have a great attention to detail and always know exactly what he or she wants at all times or, at the very least, know how to project that image.



On the other side of the coin, would you really write-off a potential partner simply because his/her English doesn't come up to scratch?

My English is awful simply because I had no interest in English Language when I was at school. As soon as I could make my own choice on subjects to study I binned it.

Surely content is more important than the style? i.e. what a person has to say rather than how he/she says it?

It is possible to have strong opinions supported by facts that are worth hearing without being an English student. To discard these simply because an apostrophe is out of place seems on the harsh side.

Also, I'm struggling to see how sub-standard grammar can be translated into a lack of control. It seems to me that a lack of interest in English Language as an educational route is more appropriate.

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Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 12:35:16 AM   
meatcleaver


Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline 		Ghengis Khan didn't have much of an education but he kept control reasonably well.

As for a sex partner I don't care if she leaves the 'found' out of profound and just leaves me the 'pro'. A man doesn't need a genius to give him a BJ though intelligence is always welcome and she does needs to know 'blow' is merely a figure of speach.

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 12:52:27 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Wizard needs food badly.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Najakcharmer

ALL OF YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.  

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RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 5:13:04 AM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline 		On balance, control can be measured by various means. In my opinion, the odd spelling mistake is not a valid measure. However, when I see a post lacking structure and paragraphs I instinctively feel the poster lacks organisation and control.

Exploring the above further into wider society, we all have human frailties. The art of being in control is allowing the fragile arm of your personality the room to manouevre only in the right environment. If an issue is pissing you off then you can't allow it to gnaw at you as it will begin to dominate/control your personality and relationships with others. If you're not happy with something then do something about it to change it. Until you've changed it then only open up your frailties to the select few in the right environment i.e. those who you know have the will and capacity to support you (rather than every Tom, Dick and Harry).

In sum, in my opinion, the definition of being in control is working/controlling the various arms of your personality to your benefit. Ultimately, I can't see how a few spelling mistakes or poor grammar impact on this definition.



_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to someonesbitchboy)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 9:10:19 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Wizard needs food badly.


And that warrior chick moans like she's totally turned on every time she gets smacked by an orc, while the elfboy giggles.  There is definitely something kinky going on in Gauntlet. 

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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: On grammar, spelling and first impressions - 10/26/2006 9:27:40 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: someonesbitchboy
That was written in this posting as a bit of humor, but that’s not too far from the truth for the more extreme examples of what I’ve seen out there.  We’ve all seen them.  And these people expect any kind of power exchange to take place? 


The really sad part is that I've amused myself by going into a chat room in exactly that persona....and won my bet with the other folks who were physically in the room watching the screen by getting offers to submit to me on webcam within a minute or less.  A femdom (or a big hairy dude pretending to be a femdom) doesn't *have* to be articulate or even vaguely literate to generate plenty of immediate interest.  The quality of respondents is highly debatable, but they do fit the bill for delivering immediate gratification and thus effective positive reinforcement of the behavior. 

There will always be a market for female dominants regardless of how poorly they present themselves.  Consequently they don't get much effective negative reinforcement for their lack of effort.  One would suppose that given a more competitive environment with stronger selective pressure from their target audience, men of the same caliber would learn to improve their personal presentation.  For whatever reason that doesn't seem to be the case, and we remain innundated with "I R TEH DOMINATE" profiles from both genders.

There really is a good illustration of some interesting principles in psychology here.  There have been some good papers in the last few years on Internet addiction, online social interaction and the evolution of language and communication in the new global village.  I don't have my links handy, so if you find any good ones, or more recent ones I haven't seen, post'em on board please?

(in reply to someonesbitchboy)
Profile   Post #: 40
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