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Love? - 10/28/2006 7:47:43 AM   
onlythewindknows


Posts: 259
Joined: 10/22/2006
Status: offline 		OK i am listed as vanilla to the left, and this is kind of a big question, and i know this gets touched on a bit here and there, BUT...

To me it is clear that there is a zone where many (most? all?) subs/slaves adore and perhaps truly love their Masters.  I am still unclear about the other way around.

This question is not meant generically but to Your own experience.

Have You/would You/could You really love, perhaps (by however You might define it) be in love with a sub/slave or is there a level of control that would prevent it from happening or at least from it being revealed to her OR would that feeling blur the power exchange and perhaps even cause You to sever ties with her? Or would it make the whole thing stronger?

I know this sounds naive on some level but i mean it as an essential question and am interested in individual perspectives.

Also, i don't want this to go on a "what is love" tangent - let "love" be whatever You find it to be in Your direct experience.


< Message edited by onlythewindknows -- 10/28/2006 7:57:32 AM >
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 7:51:02 AM   
Level


Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		I've had one submissive, and I loved her very much. It did not affect our D/s aspect very much at all.
 
All things are possible, and the potential is there for any kind of relationship.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 7:53:20 AM   
LadyMarmalade1


Posts: 103
Joined: 2/26/2006
Status: offline 		I cannot speak for the Masters, but i am a Mistress and I love my slave very much.  As we get deeper in Ds and as we are together longer, I love him even more. 
I think it makes everything that much stronger, but I imagine there are others who disagree.
I am sure there are many Masters who love their slaves/subs.  I guess it all depends on the people involved.

Lady Marmalade 

(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 8:13:12 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		yes... I am very much in love with alandra and kyra.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 8:57:16 AM   
gandalf0297


Posts: 148
Joined: 8/6/2006
Status: offline 		Love certianly adds an interseting dynamic to the mix.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 9:11:24 AM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		http://www.collarchat.com/m_651231/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#651253
What's love got to do with it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_632033/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#632105
Loving your property

http://www.collarchat.com/m_609494/mpage_2/key_love/tm.htm#609934
Ownership and Love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_545462/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#545482
What does love got to do with it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_538921/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#538965
The Loving Dom

http://www.collarchat.com/m_499831/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#499881
Don't fall in love with your dom

http://www.collarchat.com/m_477568/mpage_3/key_love/tm.htm#484997
How common is it to fall in love with a submissive or dominant?

http://www.collarchat.com/tm.asp?m=423736&mpage=1&key=love&#423879
Love and Ms

http://www.collarchat.com/m_282567/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#282615
submissive/slave romantic love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_269031/mpage_1/key_love%252Csubmission/tm.htm#269120
Falling in love with Mistress

http://www.collarchat.com/m_248492/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#248492
true love in a relationship

http://www.collarchat.com/m_236486/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#236486
balancing commitment and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_199915/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#199915
love in bdsm

http://www.collarchat.com/m_166085/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#166085
love and D/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_65043/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#65043
love and bdsm (the unfettered heart)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_150281/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#150281
Is it normal to fall in love with your dom during training?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_125880/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#125880
not allowed to love him, what do I do?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_119832/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#119832
being owned or being loved

http://www.collarchat.com/m_97124/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#97124
subs/masochists and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_31285/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#31285
can love get in the way?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_14998/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#14998
love in d/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2491/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#2491
is love important in a relationship?



_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 9:44:21 AM   
onlythewindknows


Posts: 259
Joined: 10/22/2006
Status: offline 		wow LuckyAlbatross - awesome - thanks for the effort in posting this list!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 9:51:15 AM   
charismagirrl


Posts: 297
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		i definitely love my Master/Daddy-completely and fully and he loves me in the same type of way.He actually was in love with me before i could allow myself to fall in love with him.

Personally, i think it makes us much stronger and it will also make it easier for him to push me to further places. He has gone to great lengths to make sure that i am secure in his love for me so that when he does some of the nasiy things he does or wants to do to me/with me that i will know that they're coming from a place of love.

Atleast in our case (and i can only speak of us and no one else) the absence of love would make it impossible for us to do the things we do or will do.


_____________________________

For today i won't say but...
For today i wont say just...
For today i will simply obey....
For today i will trust that You are right...
For always i will be your imperfect slave

http://www.mycollarspace.com

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Love? - 10/28/2006 6:19:19 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		We've discussed this as it worries me that his feelings for might make it impossible for his to draw a line. However he assures me this is needless. I am probably indulged more because he loves me, he wants to do nice things for me, make sure I'm not overworked etc. Which is quite different from him feeling that he has to do things or else I might leave. It's very much his choice, and that's what matters to me.

(in reply to charismagirrl)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 3:05:16 PM   
TexasMaam


Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline 		In a word, yes, both requited Love, and otherwise. TM

_____________________________

~ My opinions are not necessarily those of the management... ~

(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 3:23:27 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline 		A parent loves their child yet maintains authority in the relationship.

A person loves a dog but has no problem disciplining it or keeping the roles in tact.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to TexasMaam)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 3:32:07 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I love my sub with all my heart and he loves me just as much. I can't imagine a relationship without it, for me it would be pretty empty.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 3:38:58 PM   
angelspassion4u


Posts: 632
Joined: 7/17/2006
From: Angels
Status: offline 		I could never be in a relationship without love. I have to be in love with the person to be totally free to give my submission to them.  That is just me.

_____________________________

Recommends books by Victoria Morris through Pink Flamingo publishers.
"You can PLEASE some people some of the time, most people most of the time, but NEVER all the people all of the time."

(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 4:19:39 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline
quote:

Also, i don't want this to go on a "what is love" tangent - let "love" be whatever You find it to be in Your direct experience.


Was thinking about that. Love, whatever it is to each individual usually amounts to some kind of connection, bond whatever. Do we really want to give ourselves to someone who can't/won't feel that, seems that would be setting ourselves up for an abusive relationship.

Saying that, I don't believe there can be a healthy D/s relationship without some form of  love, whatever people conceive it to be.


_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to angelspassion4u)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 4:29:28 PM   
Caitriona


Posts: 327
Joined: 8/28/2006
Status: offline 		I loved (and married) my Dom before we started exploring a D/s dynamic.  I cannot imagine having a D/s relationship that was not this deeply intimate.

However, I feel it makes the power exchange more difficult since I did not enter into the relationship in this role.  It is something that required a change in perspective for me -it has not been easy but it has been worth the struggle.  With each day that passes I am more comfortable and fulfilled in my role as his submissive. 

I would imagine that coming into a relationship knowing your expected role (and what it entails) might be easier - especially when you know that role exists within a relationship where you are loved.  I do not think that this would be without its "bumps in the road" but I think they might be less severe than what I went through.

My Lord desires to have a slave in the future, and he will love her, in a way that is different but no less valid than how he loves me.


_____________________________

Property of Shadowraven
Serving alongside ciarra

(in reply to angelspassion4u)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 4:32:21 PM   
Kaledorus


Posts: 95
Joined: 9/4/2006
Status: offline 		Even in the most extreme forms of slavery, e.g., Gorean, Norman writes about Masters falling in love with their slaves and how important it is, out of love itself, to be strict with such slaves.

Outside of the Gorean context there are also absolute Master-slave relationships where the Master loves His slave.

I think it only human that such would happen.
Although there are cases where the slave may not be loved but that is true of all too many relationships today.


(in reply to onlythewindknows)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 5:32:16 PM   
mistresssavanna


Posts: 46
Joined: 8/15/2006
Status: offline 		D/s in it's ultimate form, does NOT exist without love on some level.

Regards,

Mistress Savanna

_____________________________

President
The International Core ~Cc

(in reply to Kaledorus)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 6:31:47 PM   
dixicritter


Posts: 17
Joined: 1/31/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Caitriona

I loved (and married) my Dom before we started exploring a D/s dynamic.  I cannot imagine having a D/s relationship that was not this deeply intimate.

However, I feel it makes the power exchange more difficult since I did not enter into the relationship in this role.  It is something that required a change in perspective for me -it has not been easy but it has been worth the struggle.  With each day that passes I am more comfortable and fulfilled in my role as his submissive. 

I would imagine that coming into a relationship knowing your expected role (and what it entails) might be easier - especially when you know that role exists within a relationship where you are loved.  I do not think that this would be without its "bumps in the road" but I think they might be less severe than what I went through.



I could've written this about Daddy and I.  I couldn't agree more.  I know for me love is definately needed too.

(in reply to Caitriona)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 7:01:51 PM   
SlaveAkasha


Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline 		I can't answer for Master, but I can answer that I do love him.  He tells me he loves me and he shows me he loves me in hundred different ways. 
 
I think it is very much possible to love someone and still be their Master/Dom.
 
Kasha

_____________________________

Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry shit continues just shoot me now please.
~ Tank Girl

www.peta.org
www.goveg.com

(in reply to dixicritter)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Love? - 10/29/2006 7:49:37 PM   
Master2akasha


Posts: 35
Joined: 9/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveAkasha

I can't answer for Master, but I can answer that I do love him.  He tells me he loves me and he shows me he loves me in hundred different ways. 
 
I think it is very much possible to love someone and still be their Master/Dom.
 
Kasha

   I love my slave with all my heart.. even when I use her as a cheap toy she still knows that I love her.

(in reply to SlaveAkasha)
Profile   Post #: 20
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