FirmhandKY
Posts: 8948
Joined: 9/21/2004
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quote:
ORIGINAL: happypervert
I really don't see the point, and I'll admit that I may have made a mistake. I thought you were making those disparaging remarks intentionally and then trying to pull an Eddie Haskell on us by pretending you didn't mean it; now I think you are just just a willfully ignorant regarding your snotty remarks even after you've been called on it by LaM, me, justheather, philosophy and others. So it would be a waste of time for me to pull examples because you'll just offer more disingenuous explanations that make sense only to you.
So I apologize for giving you credit for being more clever and self aware than you are; I won't make that mistake again. And if you think I'm being snotty here, you're right! I just wonder why you can detect it in the posts of others yet fail to see it in your own (or just won't admit it).
happy,
No hidden meanings or sarcasm meant in my reply here at all (but I hope you don't mind a little levity).
But I did want to address you. Normally, I'd just ignore such a comment, but I see you at least trying to meet me half-way, although I can tell it's hurting you. 
None of us are perfect, and I don't claim to be. I can be sarcastic, and I know how to hurl an insult as well. I also know that often times what comes across in the written word seems to have a greater sting than what is said, with all the other available paths of nuance and conversation. We see a post and have the time to ponder all the possible negative ways that it could have been meant.
I'm also aware that some people don't always understand things that others write simply because they have a different experience in life. That's not a dig about education, or intelligence. If we were all the same, we wouldn't have anything to talk about, and forums such as this wouldn't exist.
When I am just "having fun" on the forums, I'll joust with anyone, perhaps add a little snappy remark, or such. Pretty common I think.
But the fact that you couldn't come up with any of my "insults" or "snarky" remarks is for a simple reason: except for the one time I intentionally made one to heather (and identified it as such) I made none.
What I did do, and freely admit, is challenged some people. I held a mirror up to them to let them see what I saw. Doing that generally doesn't make people very happy, and I do it at a risk. I am aware of that, and accept it.
I'm a believer that you can't really change people. They have to change themselves. When do they change? Generally when they are caught in "cognitive dissonance". When they recognize that they believe in two things, at the same time, and both of them can't be true. It sets up an internal conflict, and is the one of the rare times that growth can occur in an adult.
But people don't like dissonance. They react to it. Often times they attack, especially when someone gets close to the mark on an observation or comment that endangers their world view on something. It's a defensive reaction, and completely normal.
They lash out at the person who causes that feeling of unsettledness. They, in hindsight, see all of that person's comments in the most negative light. It's a feeling that may or may not be based in actual reality, but it certainly becomes their reality.
There are rare individuals who are able to face the dissonance, and grow. I think you are one of those people.
That makes me glad, and I hope it doesn't offend you.
FirmKY
< Message edited by FirmhandKY -- 11/10/2006 11:02:28 AM >
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Some people are just idiots.
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