RE: Contracts

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: Contracts

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Contracts

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Contracts - 11/15/2006 8:23:14 PM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Nah, I don't want to rescue ownie; in my yoot I could have, perhaps...but she is gonna have to walk over here now, I ain't got the steam.

LOL,
Jet Li

Man, ain't that the truth. Ron, have you noticed the days don't get shorter and the hills don't get lower? Its a bitch, ain't it? (or as they say in Milwaukee, "aina-hey?"

LaTigresse: Thats okay Ron, we will just have to get together someday around a campfire drinking and talking about the good old days.......... today I feel 94 instead of 44.

I will bring the bourbon.

Bourbon? you BETTER invite ME, wench!

Consider yourself invited........all this after one hot toddy with a liberal and I mean LIBERAL dose of MakersMark in a cuppa hot tea.....and Nyquil. Can we say nighty nite LeeAnn?!?!

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Emperor1956)

Profile

Post #: 41

RE: Contracts - 11/15/2006 8:43:46 PM

beltainefaerie

Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline

I have a contract, though I do like the term covenant, as that is more accurate. It helped us set out what everyone was comfortable with. Master is definitely a man of his word and the contract is a reminder of our agreements. My Love (husband) and I initially drafted the contract as to what would be acceptable and put any hard limits in place. I was actually quite surprised at some of what was perfectly fine with him. Next came the dialogue with my Master and His lady and made minor changes according to their parameters. When everything was agreed upon, we all signed it. We don't actually need to refer to it, as we all agreed to it. There was a miscommunication on one point initially, but generally it has worked well for us. The piece of paper is not important, but the dialogue and trust that forged it are incredibly important. Even the miscommunication was minor, because we discussed it as soon as we realized it and it actually seemed to strengethen trust between all parties in the way it was dealt with. Especially for my Love who is not part of the power exchange dynamic (except in "owning" my heart and allowing me to be slave to another), it was important to lay down what could and could not be done with his wife. Anyway, that's what worked for us.

(in reply to meatcleaver)

Profile

Post #: 42

RE: Contracts - 11/15/2006 10:52:19 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: QuietDom

I thought the idea of a slave "contract" (scare quotes, since it has no genuine legal validity whatsoever) was rather silly. Then I read Miss Abernathy's book, which discussed in some detail exactly why such a document can be appealing and reassuring to a sub -- now I rather like the idea.

Writing out what you want, what you need, what behavior you expect as well as what you have to offer is incredibly helpful and reassuring to a slave. They like to know what the rules are, how they are to be applied and under what conditions. It creates a sense of security.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to QuietDom)

Profile

Post #: 43

RE: Contracts - 11/16/2006 4:47:44 AM

adaddysgirl

Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunnydays

i personally dont beleive in them... but.. thatbeing said.. the ones you can print off area very good start for communicating.. and also thought provoking...i had never head of alot of hte stuff listed..so i researched...became alot more informed adn therefore was able to communicate with Master about hings we had never even thoght of...

contract no...a tool for exploration...oh my god yes

So although you don't actually use them, you used them as a reference point when starting out with your Master? Hmmm....i wonder if others begining new relationships might find this useful as well. Good point sunnydays.

DG

(in reply to sunnydays)

Profile

Post #: 44

RE: Contracts - 11/16/2006 4:50:14 AM

adaddysgirl

Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline

So for those of you who do use contracts (or covenants)....do you find yourself updating these as you go along? If so, what types of things do you change?

DG

(in reply to adaddysgirl)

Profile

Post #: 45

RE: Contracts - 11/16/2006 5:28:18 AM

Littlepita

Posts: 1430
Joined: 10/6/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

So for those of you who do use contracts (or covenants)....do you find yourself updating these as you go along? If so, what types of things do you change?

DG

My Joe wrote our contract in great detail according to what we wanted out of our relationship. The ones you get offline weren't suitable in our opinion. We signed the first one in March when we first moved in together and we evaluate the contract every 3 months and will for the first year. After that we hope to have a much shorter contract that says exactly what we are about in as few as words as necessary. I love the idea of calling it a covenant and will have to tell him about that.

_____________________________

“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

(in reply to adaddysgirl)

Profile

Post #: 46

RE: Contracts - 11/16/2006 5:44:39 AM

byule

Posts: 31
Joined: 11/1/2006
Status: offline

It seems in a mutual relationship whether that be of slave or sub. That respect will and should come into play. In the vanilla world a contract is a pre nupt. So you tell me if there is a contract for marriage and one partner is protecting his or her investment should there be a contract that is not as legally binding. But in most states if you are together long enough then you are considered married anyways.

Now the short version. To each there own.

(in reply to meatcleaver)

Profile

Post #: 47