quote:

ORIGINAL: bignipples2share
I could also make the point: There are two counselors, one drug addict. The drug addict goes to one that says there, there, life has been so rough for you, let’s have milk and cookies and do you know that these drugs aren’t good for you, you think you can check in to re-hab anytime soon? The other says, get off the damn drugs, or it’s fucking gonna kill ya and get in re-hab right now, I can drop you off on my way to the hospital. Let’s go.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

LOL, we got A gal from red stick, who found a Master, damn near the day she joined and now out here eating my pie, and a girl from Joisey who wouldn't make a move from it because Minnesota is so backwards, and they are fighting over who has to take my sorry ass............I am in heaven. 

it is all about me,

Ron

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave

I see the point you are trying to make, but in reality no drug counselor is going to say you can check into re-hab "anytime soon". All will encourage for immediately checking in for re-hab and I guess the force at which they push is something they learn to judge through getting to know the person they are dealing with well first. Being professionals and being face to face with these users they are in a position to be able to decide which is the better track to go down. No-one on the internet has the luxury to be able to read how a person as well as a trained individual working face to face and I am sure you'd agree the necessity to be forceful with a drug addict in order to wake him up to save his life has a slightly different urgency than someone having a bad day in a relationship.

quote:

ORIGINAL: bignipples2share
Sorry to take so long to reply, I don't get on here daily.

Not a problem :-)

My point was, this is a forum of many, not professionals, although, some professionals are surely here. The fact remains that it’s still open here for everyone to respond, otherwise, we’d only be able to ask questions of the professionals. Questions get asked here and they get responses from a wide variety of people. Some answer one way, the other in the opposite. I don’t think the person who asks the question can expect, or is really expecting the persons being asked to stick around and evaluate their whole psyche before they can respond and which tactic would be the best. I think of it as a short-hand version of getting many answers to think about in the least amount of time and zero dollars.

I do agree, but my initial point remains that often being forceful or harsh is going to be as affective and pushing crap up hill, having said that, sometimes velvet gloves and tongue are useless too. None of us is able to judge what type or response will best suit someone - so I prefer (whenever possible) to remain as passive as possible.

Yes, I do agree that there is urgency with the drug addict to save his life. Just because we’re talking relationships does not mean there can’t be, or isn’t a time for urgency when someone feels it’s feeling like quicksilver.

I guess some relationships may need dire urgent help, especially if one is being exposed to some sort of abuse etc.

~Big