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RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 8:31:00 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: alongrider

juliaoceania,

Thanks for the advice.I will say that I have removed the pix of the bikes,they where just there to show one of my hobbies.I guess some would say I am a biker but I do not consider myself to be just that.I am very multi-faceted and eclectic,I enjoy theater,comedy clubs,rock-n-roll concerts,classical music,travel,good dramatic moves,movies that some might call chick flicks( never understood that one)a good movie is a good movie.I think guys who use that term have issues with their masculinity,lol.Ridiing and building old motorcycles is just one part of my life.I DO ride bikes and yet I am college educated(Duke University),articulate,intelligent,and have friends that are University professors.I am not sure if you can make a correlation between all bikers and who they are as people.As for the long hair and beard,it's just my preference and not a statement of lifestyle.And to tell you the truth all my past gf's were never biker types at all.
I agree that the longer the laundry list the smaller the audiance,but this to me is the place to stae your preferences,is it not?So why not tell it like it is?Otherwise one will end up with the type of person that one is not really looking for in the first place,right?Correct me if I am wrong.And yes,I am picky,lol
I have also been told that I should not put down in my profile the I am sensitive and caring as that seems to make girls think I am not a strict Dom.That to me seems strange.I am not a hardcore Dom but I am a Dom and like my women to be submissive.I am not sure that the fact that I am sensitive and caring means that I can not be a Dominant.What do you think?


First of all I want you to know that I have nothing against bikers. I do not think they are less educated or less intelligent than any other human being on average. There are "types" and many women look at a photo and assume they know what "type" a man is. I did not see the bikes on your profile, I was going on your hair and beard. Like you have a personal preference, women that you contact have one also... and some of them may prefer the preppie short haired type with a clean shave.

I do not think you should get your hair cut and shave your beard or anything, I was just stating that your appearance would appeal to a certain number of females, but not all of them. Telling me what you did above should perhaps be in your profile? Letting women know you are educated, have diverse interests, and would like to know about theirs is a very appealing thing.... otherwise women can only know that you are a kinky biker type...smiles. Sell everything you have, not just the partial product, and personals ads are advertisements.

When my Daddy first sent me a group of photos of himself there was one of him in a cowboy hat. If he had not discussed sociology with me, and stated his political preferences it is likely I may have not talked further with him based on the cowboy hat. Certain things point to cultural attributes, and it can even work on an unconsious level. I wanted someone that I could fit easily in their life and likewise. If someone was into rodeos, country western, living in a rural area, and conservative... well we would not be a fit...

...my point is that some women may not be into bikes and not know how to fit into your life so they pass on your profile, but if they knew you had many other hobbies they could relate to they may take the time to find out more about you.. does that make sense?

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 8:37:25 AM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline 		I do so wish you were sub lol

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 11:43:24 AM   
alongrider


Posts: 19
Joined: 7/17/2006
Status: offline 		Lol, julia,julia,if I didn't know better I would think you are placing people in certain categories according to their appearance.Someone as intelligent as you ought to know that is a dangerous assumption.As a matter of fact one of the guys I ride my motorcycle with is a tenured professor at a Duke and he has long hair and a much longer beard than I.Do not get me wrong I am not upset,it happens all the tyme,I am just disappointed.As a matter of fact I am a Duke University alum and am intelligent,articulate and multi-faceted. But we all have our preferences and yours is what it is.But I do appreciate the feedback and help with my situation.I DID ask you opinions and a have gotten them,lol. Take good care and remember to keep an open mind and don't always judge a book by its cover. George

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 1:05:38 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline 		Greetings George,

I just wanted to put a note in here that I sent you an email and if you didn't get it, then there may be a glitch in the system. Of course, if you got it.. ignore this post and just read the email! ::laughs::

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 5:46:51 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I will reiterate, I do not judge people solely on their photos, or I would not be with my present Dom.. but if there is nothing but a photo that they present and a list of kinks, I am probably not going to be aware of the person's intellect. Did you change your profile? It reads as less kink oriented if memory serves me correctly. And btw, women have as many preferences as men... and mine are just as valid as yours

Good luck in your search!

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 6:47:04 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		The woman I am looking for may not be the type to "advertise"on a site like this.  What does this mean?  Are you trying to say that your "type" is better than this?  If so, that may be turning off some potentials.  Just a thought.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 7:50:36 PM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: alongrider

juliaoceania,

Thanks for the advice.I will say that I have removed the pix of the bikes,they where just there to show one of my hobbies.I guess some would say I am a biker but I do not consider myself to be just that.


Hmmm...i've been keeping my mouth shut on the boards simply because it is not worth arguing about "real" and "twue".
 
But this i cannot let go.
 
Here are links to a few threads where girls are looking for the biker type.
 
http://www.collarchat.com/m_338118/mpage_1/key_harley/tm.htm#338183

http://www.collarchat.com/m_533468/mpage_3/key_harley/tm.htm#534985

Not to mention the subs on here who commented that they liked the biker look.
 
My profile when i was searching said "Harley riders only".
 
I am about to be a bitch here;
 
Why in the world would you allow yourself to be pussy whipped long distance?
 
Now let's talk about honesty.
 
Are you willing to give up your bikes, your hair, and your looks for a subbie?
 
If you gave all of that up would it change who you are inside?
 
Would it make you not the guy who owned those bikes and loved the wind?
 
Grow a set to go with the look.
 
There are subbies out there who prefer bikers to anything else.
 
Those that are smart enough to realize that riding does not preclude having a brain.
 
 
 

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:08:29 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

When my Daddy first sent me a group of photos of himself there was one of him in a cowboy hat. If he had not discussed sociology with me, and stated his political preferences it is likely I may have not talked further with him based on the cowboy hat.



It is an Australian hat known as a "Squashy" and is worn by Australian cowboys, as opposed to that silly thing that C/W people wear in this country.

I wear it to keep the sun off my face since I work outside all the time.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy



_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:16:03 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Hi!I read your profile as well..Personally thought it was not bad at all.Appearance, attractive..well at least to me..think wearing a shirt would of been a nice touch (just my personal taste)however not bad all around, but as many have stated..maybe you could delve more into the D/s factor.Though I was highly appreciative of your vanilla interests,as it shows you are not solely about kink.Sadly enough though the comment about "she" may not advertise here did kind of turn me off.and again sadly enough your personal appearance preference also disappointed me. I understand personal preference is needful..but I always think sometimes your personal preference in appearance could possibly do you out of meeting the most perfect mate for you. But ach! such is the way of humanity...I wish you luck in your search..Tempting

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:16:58 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline 		 
Hello A/all,

To the OP of this thread, I did want to point something out about my own personal experience.  When I used to write letters to people online, I would get one response back for every 30-50 letters sent out.  This was because I would generally write them the standard "Hey, look at me!" sorts of emails talking in glowing terms about how cool and gnarly and rad I was.  I got the odd response back, generally a negative one.  I thought about it for a bit, and realized that this same profile probably gets 100s of emails a day from people using the "Hey, look at me!" approach.

Then one day I tried a different approach.  I removed a lot of the laundry list of things on my profile about what I liked, and started perusing profiles looking for things they other person posted that I could use as a gambit to start a conversation with them.

One of them, in particular, struck my eye because the person described herself as being liberal minded, an activist, and intention to go to graduate school.  So I thought "gee, Im liberal minded, an activist, and I intend to go to graduate school" so I wrote her a polite note asking her what she planned to study in graduate school.  It was only a matter of time before she required spankings to attempt to cure her judgemental nature and adherence to Marxist twaddle.

So to summarize, I would suggest (if you dont already do this) that you try being interested in the other person and what they want, as opposed to trying to be interesting to the other person for who you are and what you want.  You might end up getting better responses to your queries.

Good luck!

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:20:19 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Oh yes I forgot my P.S....you stated to Julioocenia..not to judge a book by its cover...in your appearance preference are you not as well doing just that?...Tempting

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:20:57 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

Sinergy

One of them, in particular, struck my eye because the person described herself as being liberal minded, an activist, and intention to go to graduate school.  So I thought "gee, Im liberal minded, an activist, and I intend to go to graduate school" so I wrote her a polite note asking her what she planned to study in graduate school.  It was only a matter of time before she required spankings to attempt to cure her judgemental nature and adherence to Marxist twaddle.



Yes, and I was so impressed with your approach I even overlooked the cowboy hat... but alas, my judgmentalness will always threaten to rear its ugly head... good thing wooden soup spoons are cheap

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 9:24:44 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Edited because I misunderstood...smiles

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 12/1/2006 9:43:47 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 10:22:16 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		....all is well...Tempting

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 10:32:16 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sinergy

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

When my Daddy first sent me a group of photos of himself there was one of him in a cowboy hat. If he had not discussed sociology with me, and stated his political preferences it is likely I may have not talked further with him based on the cowboy hat.



It is an Australian hat known as a "Squashy" and is worn by Australian cowboys, as opposed to that silly thing that C/W people wear in this country.

I wear it to keep the sun off my face since I work outside all the time.

Just me, etc.

Sinergy




Well that changes the whole thing entirely! An Aussie cowboy is completely different from an American one... although I am not sure exactly how they are different I am sure that they are...

BTW, I am sooooo glad I did not judge you by one tiny photo of you in the "squashy", and instead relied on the kilt photo to guide me in the determination of your Domly quotient....Big Smiles Daddy!

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Needing your Help - 12/1/2006 10:33:29 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

....all is well...Tempting




_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Needing your Help - 12/2/2006 3:55:23 AM   
ScooterTrash


Posts: 1407
Joined: 1/24/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: alongrider

Take good care and remember to keep an open mind and don't always judge a book by its cover.

Good point alongrider, and yes, there are many who do not understand that there are many bikers who probably defecate more class & intelligence each morning, than they will ever have. It looks like you are being attacked (no polite way to put it) by some folks who are so judgmental, they have even managed to make their way to my block list, so I wouldn't sweat the little stuff. Sure, I have some preconceived notions of certain "types", but I give them a chance, something that some are not doing for you. I don't care for snooty "Greenpeace " personalities, but I don't have to prejudge them, after they open their mouth (or their modems), then they remove all doubt about their self centered ways.

Just be yourself, maybe be more descriptive in your profile and the right match will come along. I'd keep the pics of the putt in as well, even though it's only one aspect of your being, the fact that you are a biker as well as many other things, can be very appealing to many.

_____________________________

Formal symbolic representation of qualitative entities is doomed to its rightful place of minor significance in a world where flowers and beautiful women abound.
-Albert Einstein

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Needing your Help - 12/2/2006 4:07:06 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		i am absolutely attracted to bikers, long hair and hairy chests and i would have written back in a heartbeat had i been contacted *grin* 

Sir, i wouldn't have removed the bike pics, if that's what You are into then wouldn't You want to find someone who appreicates Your interests?  i have said before that i don't think a profile needs to be a full-disclosure statement but it should reflect what is important to You.



_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to alongrider)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Needing your Help - 12/2/2006 4:11:05 AM   
SirDiscipliner69


Posts: 2607
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened
i am absolutely attracted to bikers,


Some just do not like bikers no matter how nice they really are due to stereotypes...shame

SPANK THE BOOTY
http://www.funny-base.com/games/spankthebooty.html
 
 
Ross

Bon D' Age' : BDSM
http://tinyurl.com/ygblqt
Designermite :
http://tinyurl.com/ueov5
Soul of Motorcycle Art
http://tinyurl.com/ybg73a


(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Needing your Help - 12/2/2006 4:13:45 AM   
Quivver


Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

The woman I am looking for may not be the type to "advertise"on a site like this.  What does this mean?  Are you trying to say that your "type" is better than this?  If so, that may be turning off some potentials.  Just a thought.


Yea, what's with that? 
but on another note:  the bike is you, leave the pic. 
as for your personal preference ... we all have one, yet few get what we want.

.......................................Later!

_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 40
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